1. Hey, Charles, can we talk in
the briefing room for a sec?Copy !req
2. There's a question
I gotta ask you.Copy !req
3. Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
4. It's happening.Copy !req
5. Jake is gonna
pop the question.Copy !req
6. He's gonna ask me to
be his BM.No.Copy !req
7. BM, best man,
is a common abbreviation.Copy !req
8. No one but you
has ever used it.Copy !req
9. I am so relieved.Copy !req
10. I thought maybe he was gonna
ask one of Amy's brothersCopy !req
11. or, ugh, Sarge.Copy !req
12. Hey, man, come on.Copy !req
13. Charles!Copy !req
14. Okay, so I know
this is a lot to ask...Copy !req
15. No, it's not.
I want to do it.Copy !req
16. You want to cover my shift
this weekendCopy !req
17. so I can go to
the White Plains MallCopy !req
18. and meet Darryl Strawberry at
the opening of a cellphone store?Copy !req
19. Yes.Copy !req
20. It's exactly what I was hoping
you'd ask.Copy !req
21. Great. Thanks.
You sure it's okay?Copy !req
22. Mmm-hmm. Mmm-hmm.
Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
23. I'm very happy about it.
It'll be fun. It'll be fun.Copy !req
24. Uh, look at my smile.
Have to go now.Copy !req
25. Surprise!Copy !req
26. Oh, my God!Copy !req
27. Jake!
What do you say, bud?Copy !req
28. Will you be my BM?Copy !req
29. Yes!
Yes, a million times, yes!Copy !req
30. In your face, Terry!Copy !req
31. What? I'm holding
a sparkler for you.Copy !req
32. I helped organize
a lot of this.Copy !req
33. Well, you can stick that
sparkler up your butt.Copy !req
34. I'm the best man!Copy !req
35. Captain, allow me
to introduce youCopy !req
36. to major East Coast
arms dealerCopy !req
37. Dan "Daniel" Valdano.Copy !req
38. That's right, his nickname is
longer than his actual name.Copy !req
39. Why's that, Terry?
'Cause he's a dick.Copy !req
40. We got a warrant to bug him,
but his house is a fortressCopy !req
41. and he never goes anywhere
in public.Copy !req
42. Luckily,
CI just gave us a break.Copy !req
43. Valdano's gonna actually
leave his houseCopy !req
44. to go to a high stakes
poker game this Friday.Copy !req
45. If we can get a seat
at that table,Copy !req
46. we can lose this watch to him.Copy !req
47. And guess what.
It's...Copy !req
48. Bugged!
Yes, it's bugged.Copy !req
49. Good guess, Captain.Copy !req
50. The plan is, we go to
the club tonight,Copy !req
51. show off our poker skills,
and get an inviteCopy !req
52. to the high stakes game.Copy !req
53. All we need is $15,000
to get in the door.Copy !req
54. That's a lot of money.
How are your poker skills?Copy !req
55. (BLOWS RASPBERRY)
A'ight.Copy !req
56. Good.
A'ight.Copy !req
57. Hecka good.
A'ight.Copy !req
58. So good.
Perhaps I should seeCopy !req
59. for myself.Copy !req
60. Oh. Do you play?
I am...Copy !req
61. A'ight.
Damn, Cap.Copy !req
62. Are you secretly cool?
Well, poker is just math,Copy !req
63. so I guess it depends on
if you considerCopy !req
64. the mathematician
Carl Friedrich Gauss cool.Copy !req
65. I do not.Copy !req
66. All right,
let's play some cards.Copy !req
67. Sarge asked me to help you
guys with some filing.Copy !req
68. Holy crap, this is gonna take
all day.Copy !req
69. Yup, it's what we call
an all-dayer.Copy !req
70. How long did it take you two
to come up with that?Copy !req
71. That was a two-dayer.Copy !req
72. Okay, well,
hand me some files.Copy !req
73. You're not gonna bother
actually walking?Copy !req
74. Why should we?
We can work from down here.Copy !req
75. I'm sitting down
as long as I can.Copy !req
76. I'm not getting out
of the chairCopy !req
77. till it's time to go home.Copy !req
78. Ugh.
Oh, typical standing elite.Copy !req
79. You couldn't sit all day
if you tried.Copy !req
80. What? You don't think I could
outlast you turds in a chair?Copy !req
81. Honey, you don't have
the ass for it.Copy !req
82. Let's talk terms.Copy !req
83. Both cheeks on the cushion
at all times.Copy !req
84. Obviously.
Bathroom breaks?Copy !req
85. Two and a half minutes
every three hours.Copy !req
86. But you gotta roll the chair
fully into the stall.Copy !req
87. Obviously.
Okay.Copy !req
88. Let's do this.
Welcome to the Buttlympics.Copy !req
89. I call to order
the meeting of investorsCopy !req
90. in the forthcoming Charles
Boyle owned-and-operatedCopy !req
91. food truck venture.Copy !req
92. I know I'm the only investor,Copy !req
93. but is it cool
if I take minutes?Copy !req
94. Yes.
Put this down, we got a truck.Copy !req
95. What? Really?
That's huge.Copy !req
96. Take a look.Copy !req
97. Is that the NYPD police
auction site?Copy !req
98. Yeah, that's how I found out
about it.Copy !req
99. And there's our baby.
Isn't she a...Copy !req
100. Murder truck?Copy !req
101. That's the truck from
the Tinga Time Taco murders!Copy !req
102. Yes, two brothers were
using a taco truckCopy !req
103. to move heroin and then were
killed by the cartelCopy !req
104. that supplied them.
Not just killed, Boyle.Copy !req
105. Dismembered.
Right in the truck.Copy !req
106. Right in our truck. That's
why it was such bargain.Copy !req
107. Everyone else was like, "Ooh,
there's a knee in the fryer.Copy !req
108. "I don't want to sell food
out of this."Copy !req
109. They found a knee
in the fryer?Copy !req
110. Exactly. You get it.Copy !req
111. Well, now I get to go
pick it up.Copy !req
112. Oh, almost forgot
my hazmat suit.Copy !req
113. And...
I win again.Copy !req
114. Which is not surprising, given
how you are both terrible.Copy !req
115. You don't even know
the terminology.Copy !req
116. What are you talking about?
"Hit me."Copy !req
117. That is blackjack.Copy !req
118. Snake-eyes.
Craps.Copy !req
119. Go Fish.
And I believe that isCopy !req
120. Go Fish.
Fine.Copy !req
121. Jake stinks, but I can play.Copy !req
122. Yes, but you have a rather
unfortunate tell,Copy !req
123. your right breast.Copy !req
124. Oh, no.
My cards are terrible.Copy !req
125. Sure they are.Copy !req
126. Damn it, Eugene,
you sold me out!Copy !req
127. Captain, do I have a tell?Copy !req
128. No, you don't understand
the game well enoughCopy !req
129. to have a tell.
Yeah, that makes sense.Copy !req
130. What about you?
What's your tell?Copy !req
131. It is subtle.
You will never discern it.Copy !req
132. Oh, really?
Well, challenge accepted.Copy !req
133. Tell me a lie.Copy !req
134. You're both great at pokerCopy !req
135. and I'm not gonna cancel
the mission.Copy !req
136. Nope, I couldn't see it.
Wait, what?Copy !req
137. You're canceling the mission?
You can't do that.Copy !req
138. This is our only shot
at catching Valdano.Copy !req
139. It's a foolish plan.
Neither of you have any chanceCopy !req
140. of making it to the VIP table.Copy !req
141. But maybe you could.
What if you played?Copy !req
142. No, I don't gamble anymore.Copy !req
143. A few years back I had
a minor addiction,Copy !req
144. specifically involving...Copy !req
145. The ponies.Copy !req
146. I'd like to bet $20,000 onCopy !req
147. Yabba Dabba Doo.Copy !req
148. Sadly, Yabba Dabba Doo
stumbledCopy !req
149. and had to be put down
in front all of us.Copy !req
150. Oh. That's fun.
Wait.Copy !req
151. What if I never went
inside the casino?Copy !req
152. I could be outside
in a surveillance van,Copy !req
153. telling Peralta what to do.Copy !req
154. Smart. That way you never
technically gamble.Copy !req
155. Right.
I don't know.Copy !req
156. Addiction is nothing to
fool around with.Copy !req
157. I had food issues.
I ate a crate of hams once.Copy !req
158. Yeah, and look at you now.Copy !req
159. You're like a super-jacked
He-Man guy, right?Copy !req
160. It's settled, we'll go with
the Captain's plan.Copy !req
161. Here's your persona. You're
Billy "Big Time" Jankowski.Copy !req
162. You wear sunglasses,
headphones,Copy !req
163. and an unwashed hoodie.Copy !req
164. You normally gamble online,Copy !req
165. from your mother's basement,
where you live.Copy !req
166. Seems unnecessary.Copy !req
167. The hoodie hides your
sunglass-camera's electronics.Copy !req
168. I more meant the living in
my mom's basement virgin vibe.Copy !req
169. You added the virgin,
but I like it.Copy !req
170. It's part of your
backstory now.Copy !req
171. But...
You're a virgin.Copy !req
172. That's an order.Copy !req
173. But I don't want to be
a virgin again.Copy !req
174. (OVER RADIO) Okay,
I'm approaching the table.Copy !req
175. Evening, gentlemen.
Let's play some cards.Copy !req
176. And now, Peralta,
say the following...Copy !req
177. I'm coming in under the gun,Copy !req
178. and I've 15K behind.Copy !req
179. Okay.Copy !req
180. Action's on you.Copy !req
181. Mmm, tasty.
Raise it 500.Copy !req
182. Raise it five hundo.Copy !req
183. Made up my own.
What?Copy !req
184. I'm just talking to myself.Copy !req
185. I'm used to playing online,
so it's not weird.Copy !req
186. Well, well, well.Copy !req
187. You flopped the absolute nuts,
Peralta.Copy !req
188. Go all in.Copy !req
189. Are you sure?
On the first hand, Captain?Copy !req
190. It's what the math dictates.Copy !req
191. At this moment, there are no
two cards that can beat Peralta.Copy !req
192. I'm all in.
And now they all foldCopy !req
193. like so much
recently dried linen.Copy !req
194. I'll call.
What an idiot.Copy !req
195. Two players.Copy !req
196. What?
Full house wins.Copy !req
197. Yes!
No, he won, not you.Copy !req
198. You're out of chips.Copy !req
199. Oh, well, that sucks.Copy !req
200. Guess I'll just head back
to my mom's basement.Copy !req
201. I'm a virgin.Copy !req
202. All clear. No poopers.Copy !req
203. Repeat, no poopers.Copy !req
204. That was a disaster.Copy !req
205. I thought Holt was supposed
to be great at this.Copy !req
206. Any poopers?
All clear.Copy !req
207. What happened, Captain?
(SCOFFS)Copy !req
208. That imbecile
in the trucker hatCopy !req
209. hit both his runners
and sucked out on the river.Copy !req
210. Yeah, he did.
What does that mean?Copy !req
211. Not to worry.Copy !req
212. The odds of that happening
again are infinitesimal.Copy !req
213. Not that it matters.
Since we're out of money.Copy !req
214. Oh, but we're not.Copy !req
215. Where'd this come from?
It's my money.Copy !req
216. There are 25 ATMs
in this place.Copy !req
217. Even the fire exit has one.Copy !req
218. You want us to use
your own money?Copy !req
219. You sure that's a good idea?Copy !req
220. I haven't placed a bet
or touched a card.Copy !req
221. I'm fine.Copy !req
222. Technically that is true.Copy !req
223. Trust me,
the math is in our favor.Copy !req
224. All right, let's get back in
there and suck out two runnersCopy !req
225. down by the river.Copy !req
226. Did I say that right?
Not even close.Copy !req
227. Yeah, I didn't think so.Copy !req
228. Still, let's get in there
and suck 'em out.Copy !req
229. No time like the present.Copy !req
230. And no place to do it like
the men's bathroom,Copy !req
231. to leave from hereCopy !req
232. to go do what we're
talking about.Copy !req
233. Ugh.
Nine hours and 55 minutes.Copy !req
234. Is it?
I feel like I just sat down.Copy !req
235. I have no feeling down there
whatsoever.Copy !req
236. (GROANS)
I haven't in years.Copy !req
237. I'm doing great too.
This has been a piece of ca...Copy !req
238. Oh, butt cramp.
Butt cramp!Copy !req
239. That sounds painful.Copy !req
240. I bet you could use
some electrolytes.Copy !req
241. Give me that! That's mine.
Come get it.Copy !req
242. You'll never catch me!Copy !req
243. Oh, won't I?Copy !req
244. Oh!Copy !req
245. (EXHALES DEEPLY)
Cramp over.Copy !req
246. And so is our shift.Copy !req
247. Ha.
And you thought I couldn't...Copy !req
248. Wait, what are you doing?Copy !req
249. You thought we were done just
because our shift was over?Copy !req
250. Amateur.
Oh.Copy !req
251. So you wanna take this thing
into overtime?Copy !req
252. Fine.
I got no place to be.Copy !req
253. Neither do I.Copy !req
254. I never do.
Then it's agreed.Copy !req
255. The games continue.Copy !req
256. (OVER RADIO)
And now you're going to...Copy !req
257. Fold.
Fold.Copy !req
258. Fold.
Fold.Copy !req
259. Fold.
Fold.Copy !req
260. Should we consider
cutting our losses?Copy !req
261. Hush, Sergeant.
Our cards are coming.Copy !req
262. And there she is.Copy !req
263. You won.Copy !req
264. I won.
You won!Copy !req
265. Won again.
That's our straight.Copy !req
266. And again, again.
Hot damn!Copy !req
267. Peralta, say "hot damn."Copy !req
268. Hot damn!
Now you say it.Copy !req
269. Hot damn!
Full house.Copy !req
270. Eights over threes.Copy !req
271. Good.
Now say to the dealer...Copy !req
272. Well, this has been fun.Copy !req
273. But I'm sick
of playing withCopy !req
274. wittle wittle babies.Copy !req
275. Is there a table for people
who wear big boy pants?Copy !req
276. Actually, there's
a private game on FridayCopy !req
277. I think you might like.Copy !req
278. Much obliged.Copy !req
279. Hey, there, bud.
Hey.Copy !req
280. Can we talk about the
murder truck we just purchasedCopy !req
281. with our very
hard-earned money?Copy !req
282. Oh, Amy, wait till
you see her.Copy !req
283. I spent all night
pressure-washing her,Copy !req
284. and she is spotless.Copy !req
285. Yeah, it's just,
what if word gets outCopy !req
286. that our food truck was
the site of a double homicide?Copy !req
287. What if word gets out?Copy !req
288. It's in the "Our Story"
section of the menu.Copy !req
289. We're calling it Murder Truck!Copy !req
290. We are?
Yeah!Copy !req
291. It was your idea.
No, it was my greatest fear.Copy !req
292. I can't believe you're leaning
into the murder thing.Copy !req
293. Well, it'll get people
talking.Copy !req
294. Check out the menu.Copy !req
295. It's printed
on a crime scene photo.Copy !req
296. Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.Copy !req
297. Charles, we're gonna
lose all of our money.Copy !req
298. Are you worried?Copy !req
299. Oh, okay, I see
what's happening.Copy !req
300. Starting a business
is very scary.Copy !req
301. But I promise you,
once you see our truck,Copy !req
302. you'll feel a lot better.
Come on.Copy !req
303. No, no, no, no, no!
My truck!Copy !req
304. My beautiful truck!Copy !req
305. Someone ripped her apart!Copy !req
306. Please tell me you
got insurance.Copy !req
307. I did.
Okay, thank God.Copy !req
308. Coverage starts tomorrow.Copy !req
309. Well, Valdano's gonna
be there tonight,Copy !req
310. and the recording device in
the watch is transmitting.Copy !req
311. I feel like Bond.
Terry Bond.Copy !req
312. Well, technically I'm
the one wearing the watch,Copy !req
313. so that would make you Q
at best.Copy !req
314. - Terry Q.
- Yeah. Way to roll with it.Copy !req
315. Come on, let's tell Holt
we're prepped for tonight.Copy !req
316. I gotta say, I was wrong
about him.Copy !req
317. He had no problem
walking away last night.Copy !req
318. He left a lot of hams
in that crate.Copy !req
319. Juicy.Copy !req
320. Spiral-cut, honey-sweet,
but salty...Copy !req
321. Sarge, come back to me.
What?Copy !req
322. You're the one that
brought up ham.Copy !req
323. That was you.
Yes, yes, come to papa.Copy !req
324. Raise it a grand!
Call. Raise.Copy !req
325. A pair of candy canes.
I'm all in, baby.Copy !req
326. What are you doing, sir?Copy !req
327. Working the case. Sharpening
my poker skills for Valdano.Copy !req
328. Mmm-hmm, mmm-hmm,
and why are you watchingCopy !req
329. this children's
beauty pageant?Copy !req
330. For fun, obviously.Copy !req
331. No, Jayla,
don't drop the baton.Copy !req
332. No, I had so much
riding on you!Copy !req
333. Oh, no.
He is deep in the ham crate.Copy !req
334. Are you sure about this?
Yes.Copy !req
335. Captain Holt's been in
his office gambling for hours.Copy !req
336. Our only choice is to cut off
his internet.Copy !req
337. No, I mean, are you sure
you know how to do that?Copy !req
338. Of course. I just have
to pull this...Copy !req
339. Oh!Copy !req
340. Argh!
Wrong wire.Copy !req
341. Yep, we'll...
We'll fix that later.Copy !req
342. And...Copy !req
343. What the hell?
Got it.Copy !req
344. Having trouble with
your internet, sir?Copy !req
345. He's not here.
Where'd he go?Copy !req
346. Roof.Copy !req
347. What are you doing?Copy !req
348. Trying to pick up a Wi-Fi
signal from across the street.Copy !req
349. I've got $8,000
riding on little Jayla.Copy !req
350. Don't you think you have
a bit of a problem here, sir?Copy !req
351. I'm in complete control.Copy !req
352. Now, Terry, come over here
and dangle meCopy !req
353. off the edge of this building.Copy !req
354. Sir, I am not going
to dangle youCopy !req
355. off the side of this building.Copy !req
356. You're fired. Peralta, let
me climb onto your shoulders.Copy !req
357. I can't...
You're fired.Copy !req
358. No one works here anymore.Copy !req
359. Look, we need to have a real
talk about your gambling.Copy !req
360. Relapsing is nothing to be
ashamed of.Copy !req
361. A couple years ago on
my birthday I treated myselfCopy !req
362. to one piece of pizza.Copy !req
363. I woke up the next morning in a
Sbarro on the Jersey Turnpike.Copy !req
364. It wasn't even open!Copy !req
365. That's not what's
happening here.Copy !req
366. I'm not weak like you.
I can stop whenever I want.Copy !req
367. Then stop.
I don't want.Copy !req
368. Now if you'll excuse me,Copy !req
369. I'm going to go to
the Acai Bowl internet cafe.Copy !req
370. Got a lot of money riding on
the NLCS,Copy !req
371. whatever the hell that is.Copy !req
372. We can't let you do that.Copy !req
373. And how exactly
will you stop me?Copy !req
374. We'll call your husband.Copy !req
375. No.Copy !req
376. No, I can't put Kevin through
this, not again.Copy !req
377. You're right.
I've lost control,Copy !req
378. and I'm taking myself
off this case.Copy !req
379. And I'm not going anywhere
near gambling again.Copy !req
380. You promise?
From the bottom of my heart.Copy !req
381. It's a dead issue.Copy !req
382. I'm proud of you, sir.Copy !req
383. So am I, Captain.Copy !req
384. So I'm sorry. Terry,
you went to Jersey for pizza?Copy !req
385. I had a problem, man!Copy !req
386. Right, sorry.Copy !req
387. Ugh, how long have we
been sitting?Copy !req
388. My butt's lost track
of time.Copy !req
389. Coming up on 32 hours.Copy !req
390. (SIGHS)
I miss the little things.Copy !req
391. Showers.
Feeling my feet.Copy !req
392. Standing.
I miss my home chair.Copy !req
393. You miss a chair?Copy !req
394. I just want to walk up to
the hot dog stand out frontCopy !req
395. and get a fresh wiener.Copy !req
396. Oh, man. Why did you say
that? Now I want one.Copy !req
397. So you should go get one. Oh,
and let you win?Copy !req
398. You're just trying to get us
to stand up.Copy !req
399. No.
We should all go get one...Copy !req
400. In our chairs.
She's right.Copy !req
401. The only thing holding us
back is society.Copy !req
402. Mmm.
So good.Copy !req
403. I got it. No.
(MUSIC DISTORTS AND STOPS)Copy !req
404. My ass.
It left the chair.Copy !req
405. I'm sorry, man.Copy !req
406. No.
It was my time.Copy !req
407. It's our time, too.Copy !req
408. We've been through hell
together.Copy !req
409. Now we stand together.Copy !req
410. Nope.
Legs are dead.Copy !req
411. Going down.Copy !req
412. Charles,
what are you doing?Copy !req
413. I know having our truck
smashed to bitsCopy !req
414. was a bit of a setback, but
don't worry, I have an idea.Copy !req
415. The truck was
deconstructed so we do...Copy !req
416. Not have a business anymore?Copy !req
417. No.
We do deconstructed food.Copy !req
418. For instance, a deconstructed
meatball sub,Copy !req
419. a meatball, rolled in
breadcrumbsCopy !req
420. with a caramelized tomato
sauce drizzle.Copy !req
421. Taste it.
Charles,Copy !req
422. I appreciate that you're
trying to fix this situation,Copy !req
423. but you don't have to.Copy !req
424. I have great news.Copy !req
425. I know who robbed us.Copy !req
426. The cartel who did
the taco truck murdersCopy !req
427. ripped apart the truck,
because there was heroinCopy !req
428. still inside it.Copy !req
429. We found opioid traces
behind the fridge.Copy !req
430. I had forensics scour
the truck for DNACopy !req
431. and we got a match,
a cartel enforcer.Copy !req
432. Do you know what this means?Copy !req
433. The truck becomes
a crime scene again.Copy !req
434. Yes! It's been impounded.
We get our money back!Copy !req
435. Great.Copy !req
436. I'm glad you get
your money back.Copy !req
437. You can invest it in somethingCopy !req
438. you actually believe in
instead of...Copy !req
439. My balls.Copy !req
440. Now if you'll excuse me,
I have 50 pounds of meatCopy !req
441. I have to return
before it goes rotten.Copy !req
442. Like my dreams.Copy !req
443. There's Valdano.
The watch is transmitting.Copy !req
444. All you have to do is lose it
to him.Copy !req
445. Worst of luck to you.
Don't worry, Terry.Copy !req
446. I'm about to crap the bed.Copy !req
447. Evening, gentlemen.
Ready for some poker?Copy !req
448. That's why we're here.Copy !req
449. (LAUGHS) Good one, stranger.Copy !req
450. I'll take 150.Copy !req
451. Hot damn!Copy !req
452. Four queens.Copy !req
453. I call this hand
the Golden Girls.Copy !req
454. Damn it.
Oh, you would look at that.Copy !req
455. My mom's calling me.
She's flipping her lidCopy !req
456. because she found all my
nudie mags in the basement.Copy !req
457. Anyways, BRB.Copy !req
458. What happened to not wanting
to gamble anymore for Kevin?Copy !req
459. Sir, you are spiraling. You
lied straight to our faces.Copy !req
460. Well, that's on you.Copy !req
461. If you could spot my tell,
you would've known.Copy !req
462. Fine.
What's your tell?Copy !req
463. Let's just say,
I'm doing it right now.Copy !req
464. I'm doing it at this
very moment.Copy !req
465. Is it standing up?
I've just done it again.Copy !req
466. Whoops, there's another time.Copy !req
467. I don't understand.
Even if you wanted to gamble,Copy !req
468. why come here,
where we'd be?Copy !req
469. I lost a lot of money
on lame little Jayla,Copy !req
470. and I realized that's because
I've been gamblingCopy !req
471. instead of being down here
doing what I'm good at. Math.Copy !req
472. Now go get Valdano
before you blow your covers.Copy !req
473. I'm off duty, what I do on my
own time is my own business.Copy !req
474. Unlike you two who are still
on the clockCopy !req
475. and are now being bad cops.Copy !req
476. Wow, listen to youCopy !req
477. talking all smooth.Copy !req
478. But you can't fool us, sir.Copy !req
479. You might as well face it.Copy !req
480. You're addicted to math.
Robert Palmer.Copy !req
481. Come on, Sarge.
Let's go.Copy !req
482. So you're a cop.Copy !req
483. (SOFTLY)
There was a pooper.Copy !req
484. Sorry about that.Copy !req
485. Crisis averted, I told her
I read the magazinesCopy !req
486. for the articles.
She totally bought it.Copy !req
487. Wait a sec,
where are you going?Copy !req
488. Got called away on business.Copy !req
489. Come back next Friday, I'll
take your money from you then.Copy !req
490. Well, we'll just see about
that, Mr. Cool Voice.Copy !req
491. His voice is really cool.Copy !req
492. So I understand you're a copCopy !req
493. who's trying to bring me down.Copy !req
494. Why don't we take
a little drive?Copy !req
495. Why did you stay at the table
so longCopy !req
496. after Valdano
was already gone?Copy !req
497. It would've been suspicious
if I left right after he did,Copy !req
498. so I played a couple hands.Copy !req
499. Come on, let's grab Holt
and get out of here.Copy !req
500. Wait.
Where's Holt?Copy !req
501. So what was your plan, cop?Copy !req
502. Does it matter? We failed and
now you know we're onto you.Copy !req
503. You get to come out ahead
tonight,Copy !req
504. provided you don't do
anything dumb right now.Copy !req
505. My colleagues are calling,Copy !req
506. probably wondering
where I am.Copy !req
507. Then put their minds at ease.Copy !req
508. Yes?
Captain.Copy !req
509. We're leaving. Where are you?Copy !req
510. I've already left.
I don't enjoy being judged,Copy !req
511. so I'm on my way to
Atlantic City for the weekend.Copy !req
512. I'll be gambling.Copy !req
513. No, sir, please just
come back, okay?Copy !req
514. Terry and I will keep you
company.Copy !req
515. We'll go to a museum.Copy !req
516. One of the boring ones
with no dinosaurs.Copy !req
517. Forget it.
I shouldn't've answered.Copy !req
518. Bye-bye, Toxic.Copy !req
519. Bye-bye, Party in the USA.Copy !req
520. Hey, Charles.
What are you doing?Copy !req
521. I'm deleting all the upbeat
music off my computer.Copy !req
522. I know you're down, but...Copy !req
523. Bye-bye, Swish Swish Bish.Copy !req
524. Look, I feel really bad
about the way I treated you.Copy !req
525. Well, you shouldn't.Copy !req
526. You're the only one who saw
that my dream was stupidCopy !req
527. and then you got me
all my money back.Copy !req
528. Well, after you left,
I tried one of your meatballsCopy !req
529. and then another.Copy !req
530. And another.
I couldn't stopCopy !req
531. because they were
so damn good.Copy !req
532. Really? You liked them?Copy !req
533. I loved them. I should have
tried them earlier.Copy !req
534. I lost track of the fact
that this whole thingCopy !req
535. was supposed to be about
your food.Copy !req
536. I think we should buy
another food truck.Copy !req
537. You do?
Yes.Copy !req
538. But I have some conditions.Copy !req
539. One, it
cannot be a crime scene.Copy !req
540. Two, you have to get insurance
on day one.Copy !req
541. Three, you have to keep
dreaming up amazing things to cook.Copy !req
542. You're so good, Boyle.Copy !req
543. Deal!
We're gonna buy a food truck!Copy !req
544. We're gonna get a food truck!
Yes!Copy !req
545. Stop!Copy !req
546. I ate too many meatballs.Copy !req
547. Oh.Copy !req
548. Where we going?
Atlantic City.Copy !req
549. That's where you told
your friends you'd be,Copy !req
550. so that's where
they'll find your body.Copy !req
551. I'm a captain in the NYPD.Copy !req
552. Yeah, and you're also
a known gambling addict.Copy !req
553. You lost all your money
in ACCopy !req
554. and then drowned yourself
in the ocean.Copy !req
555. (ALL GRUNT)
Stay down!Copy !req
556. NYPD!
Keep your hands on the wheel.Copy !req
557. (SIGHS)
Hey there, Captain Holt.Copy !req
558. We just saved your
big ol' butt.Copy !req
559. Hello, Dan "Daniel" Valdano.Copy !req
560. Guess what?Copy !req
561. You're a dick!Copy !req
562. Yeah.Copy !req
563. How did you find me?Copy !req
564. We traced your phone
and tracked down the limo.Copy !req
565. Wait. How did you even know
I was in trouble?Copy !req
566. I figured out your tell.Copy !req
567. When you're lying,
you use contractions.Copy !req
568. Lots of 'em.Copy !req
569. I've lost control.Copy !req
570. I'm taking myself
off the case.Copy !req
571. I've just done it again.Copy !req
572. Whoops. There's another time.Copy !req
573. I shouldn't've answered.Copy !req
574. Shouldn't've answered.Copy !req
575. Shouldn't've...Copy !req
576. It was the "shouldn't've"
that finally tipped me off.Copy !req
577. I've never heard you use
a double contraction before.Copy !req
578. And you never will again.Copy !req
579. I was at rock bottom.Copy !req
580. I feel so embarrassed.Copy !req
581. I understand.
I've been there.Copy !req
582. I once ate a box of uncooked
rice in a movie theater.Copy !req
583. Wow, really?Copy !req
584. Jake.
I'm sorry.Copy !req
585. I owe you two a tremendous
debt of gratitude.Copy !req
586. I was overwhelmed
by my addictionCopy !req
587. and you were there for me.Copy !req
588. Of course, sir.
We'd do anything for you.Copy !req
589. Perhaps you two would take meCopy !req
590. to a meeting of
Gambler's Anonymous.Copy !req
591. Absolutely.
And, Jake, before we go,Copy !req
592. I need to admit one more
thing. Of course, anything.Copy !req
593. When I made you tell
that tableCopy !req
594. that you were living
in your mother's basement,Copy !req
595. it wasn't for the case.Copy !req
596. I was just messing with you.Copy !req
597. Oh, well played, sir.Copy !req
598. But the joke's on you.Copy !req
599. My mother has a fantastic
basement.Copy !req
600. Title of your sex tape.
Too soon?Copy !req
601. All right, let's go.Copy !req
602. Hey, standing desk.Copy !req
603. Look who's taking care
of herself.Copy !req
604. Someone's not sitting down
on the job.Copy !req
605. Hey.Copy !req
606. Sitting down on the job
is damned hard work,Copy !req
607. and those heroes prove it
every day.Copy !req
608. Mad respect.Copy !req
609. Okay. Sorry.Copy !req
610. Seriously, you guys should
stand up once in a while.Copy !req
611. You know, for your hearts.Copy !req