1. Oh. Come here. Come here,
come here, come here.Copy !req
2. You got to see this.Copy !req
3. I'm about to give
Captain Holt his gift.Copy !req
4. Oh! Did he lift his
"no gift" policy?Copy !req
5. No, he didn't.Copy !req
6. But I figured out
a way to buy him somethingCopy !req
7. and trick him
into accepting it.Copy !req
8. You are bad.Copy !req
9. I know, right?Copy !req
10. Wait. You're making fun of me.Copy !req
11. Mmm-hmm.
Well, I don't care.Copy !req
12. He would never
open a gift, right?Copy !req
13. But what if his gift
didn't look like a gift?Copy !req
14. He would open it?
Exactly!Copy !req
15. I left it in
a cardboard box on his desk.Copy !req
16. There's no card,
just the words, "Open now,"Copy !req
17. which I wrote
with my wrong handCopy !req
18. so he wouldn't
recognize my handwriting.Copy !req
19. Captain.
Santiago.Copy !req
20. Peralta.
Sir.Copy !req
21. So just to recap,Copy !req
22. you left an unmarked package
on a police captain's deskCopy !req
23. on a random Monday,
with a suspicious messageCopy !req
24. written on it that looked like it
was scrawled by a crazy person.Copy !req
25. Bomb! There's a bomb!Copy !req
26. Everyone out! Let's go,
let's go!Copy !req
27. This is not a drill!Copy !req
28. Let's go!Copy !req
29. Great gift, babe.Copy !req
30. Ho, ho, ho, Jake.Copy !req
31. Special delivery
from Santa's elf.Copy !req
32. Merry Christmas.Copy !req
33. Heart Attack soda.Copy !req
34. Holy crap!
I love this stuff!Copy !req
35. You know, technically,
it's just carbonated fudge.Copy !req
36. I know.
I thought they banned it.Copy !req
37. Not in Syria. They use it to
induce labor in goats.Copy !req
38. And your real
present arrives tomorrow.Copy !req
39. There's more?
Charles, this is too much.Copy !req
40. Nonsense!Copy !req
41. It was just a lot of
time and a lot of money.Copy !req
42. Oh.Copy !req
43. Gina! I screwed up.Copy !req
44. I forgot to get
Charles anything.Copy !req
45. Oh, well, I always knew
he would die of sadness.Copy !req
46. I'm such a selfish jerk.Copy !req
47. I was just so focused on Amy's
gift that I completely spaced.Copy !req
48. His present to me
was so personal.Copy !req
49. All right, think.
What does Charles love?Copy !req
50. Gross food, tan pants,
MasterChef Junior.Copy !req
51. Ooh. I could call up
one of those kidsCopy !req
52. and offer them
a free trip to New York.Copy !req
53. I wouldn't do that. Right,
'cause I'm a stranger,Copy !req
54. and I shouldn't be
luring them out of state.Copy !req
55. Good call.
Jake, just go to Goodwin's.Copy !req
56. They're open late,
and they have everything.Copy !req
57. Right. Smart.
Please come with me.Copy !req
58. Please, I need help
picking something out.Copy !req
59. Please, Gina?Copy !req
60. I'll take a pic of Terry
in the locker room for you.Copy !req
61. No towel, with his
foot up on the bench.Copy !req
62. Towel on,
still wet from the shower.Copy !req
63. I'm in.Copy !req
64. Hey, guys. What's up?Copy !req
65. Nothing.
Nothing.Copy !req
66. Hey, Diaz, are we still on for
the Polar Bear Swim tonight?Copy !req
67. It's either that or go caroling
with my family, so, yeah.Copy !req
68. I'd rather walk into
the freezing ocean.Copy !req
69. Wait,
what? You guys are doing the polar swim?Copy !req
70. Why didn't you ask me?Copy !req
71. Oh, we didn't think
you'd be interested.Copy !req
72. Yeah, you're always cold.Copy !req
73. You brought a blanket
to a Mets game in mid-July.Copy !req
74. This one thinks
July 18th is mid-July.Copy !req
75. You guys think I'm some kind
of wimp, but I'm not.Copy !req
76. I am tough, and I'm strong,Copy !req
77. and I love to splash
around in chilly water.Copy !req
78. It's not chilly, it's as cold
as the waters of Cocytus,Copy !req
79. the frozen lake of hell.Copy !req
80. I'll see you there.Copy !req
81. I can't wait
to dunk my junk.Copy !req
82. Okay, gang. I'm out.Copy !req
83. I'll be back on the 27th.Copy !req
84. I've got two
days of family time.Copy !req
85. Do not attempt
to contact me.Copy !req
86. I do not want
a repeat of last yearCopy !req
87. when Scully called me 50 times
on Christmas morning.Copy !req
88. No. I called you once.Copy !req
89. My butt called
the other 49.Copy !req
90. Yeah, well, my brother-in-law,
Zeke, was real judge-yCopy !req
91. about how much my
phone was buzzing.Copy !req
92. Somebody's got a lot
of business to tend to.Copy !req
93. Who are you?
Barbara Corcoran?Copy !req
94. He didn't even make me
one of the good Sharks.Copy !req
95. I'm clearly Lori.Copy !req
96. Nobody call me.Copy !req
97. Gina.Copy !req
98. It's our first annual
Boyle-Linetti Christmas.Copy !req
99. Are you excited about
going to town on Daddy's nog?Copy !req
100. Christmas is canceled.
Charles ruined it.Copy !req
101. I'm gonna be a little late.Copy !req
102. I got to help Jake
do some shopping.Copy !req
103. Oh. Last-minute gifts.Copy !req
104. Ooh. Who didn't
make the cut?Copy !req
105. Tell me, Jake, who's the poor
sack at the bottom of your list?Copy !req
106. Actually, Amy.Copy !req
107. Amy?
Yeah.Copy !req
108. Uff. That's bad.Copy !req
109. Just give
her whatever you got me.Copy !req
110. Really?Copy !req
111. But then I wouldn't
have a gift for you.Copy !req
112. Would you be
cool with that?Copy !req
113. No, that would
eviscerate me.Copy !req
114. I'll get my coat. I'm gonna
help you find something for her.Copy !req
115. Oh, that's not necessary.Copy !req
116. Jake.Copy !req
117. Also not necessary
to touch my face.Copy !req
118. It's Christmas.
A time for friendship.Copy !req
119. Damn it. All right.Copy !req
120. I guess you'll just
have to distract himCopy !req
121. when we get to the store.
On it.Copy !req
122. I'll take him to
housewares and I'll ask himCopy !req
123. the difference between
a skillet and a frying pan.Copy !req
124. That'll buy you six hours.
Perfect.Copy !req
125. Gina,
you just saved Christmas.Copy !req
126. It's what I do.Copy !req
127. Every damn year.Copy !req
128. Good night.
Good night.Copy !req
129. Wait! No, no, no,
no, no! Don't lock the door!Copy !req
130. I just need to
buy one thing.Copy !req
131. I'll be so fast,
I won't even pay!Copy !req
132. How did that not work?Copy !req
133. Hey, there's still people in
there. They're not closed.Copy !req
134. First time at a retail store,
Oliver Twist?Copy !req
135. They lock the doors,
but if you're still inside,Copy !req
136. you get an extra 15
minutes to finish up.Copy !req
137. Oh. Perfect, so we should just try and
sneak in an entrance through the back.Copy !req
138. Boyle, you'll have to stay
here. It's too dangerous.Copy !req
139. No way I let you
take that risk alone.Copy !req
140. Damn it, you are loyal.Copy !req
141. Shall we?Copy !req
142. Whereas, with the skillet,Copy !req
143. the approach to fish skin
is completely different.Copy !req
144. Uh-huh. And your spatula
technique is completely intuitive.Copy !req
145. Please, tell me more.
Okay. I got it.Copy !req
146. They're closing. Let's go.Copy !req
147. Let's take a peep
at that purchase.Copy !req
148. Cologne?
Uh, it's perfume.Copy !req
149. For a lady. Woman.Copy !req
150. It's called
"Canyon Stank."Copy !req
151. It's got a man
riding a burro on it.Copy !req
152. Oh! Does it? I didn't notice.
I just like the way it smelled.Copy !req
153. I wear this cologne, Jake.
I'm a Stank man.Copy !req
154. Um, I don't know,
maybe just subconsciouslyCopy !req
155. I wanted Amy to
smell more like you.Copy !req
156. Okay, little creepy, bud.
Coming on real strong.Copy !req
157. Wow, the tables
have really turned.Copy !req
158. Shut up! Keep walking!Copy !req
159. Shoot!
The store is being robbed!Copy !req
160. Come here.Copy !req
161. All right, just slowly back
up. There's a door behind us.Copy !req
162. We just have to get outside
and call the Nine-Nine.Copy !req
163. Go.Copy !req
164. Just head for the vault.
We're good.Copy !req
165. Lock 'em up!
They're sealing the exits.Copy !req
166. Oh, my God.Copy !req
167. It's real-life Die Hard.Copy !req
168. I mean, "Oh, no! Crime."Copy !req
169. They've taken all
the security guards.Copy !req
170. I left my gun in my locker.
Are you carrying?Copy !req
171. No, mine's at work.Copy !req
172. Boyle Christmas charades
can get pretty competitiveCopy !req
173. and it's best not to
have firearms around.Copy !req
174. We don't need guns.
I have a lighter, okay?Copy !req
175. We get some hairspray,
make some flamethrowers.Copy !req
176. Let's fry these bitches.Copy !req
177. No one is
frying any bitches.Copy !req
178. Charles, did you
call this into dispatch?Copy !req
179. Yes, but I can't get in touch
with anyone from the Nine-Nine.Copy !req
180. Right. Amy, Rosa, and Holt
are having the time of their livesCopy !req
181. splashing around in the freezing,
filthy ocean.Copy !req
182. I'll try Terry.Copy !req
183. Thank you for
this amazing year.Copy !req
184. Thank you for
the food in front of us.Copy !req
185. And my family,
which is my number-one priority.Copy !req
186. Much more than... Phones.Copy !req
187. Just take the call,
Barbara Corcoran.Copy !req
188. This better be
an emergency.Copy !req
189. There better be
a gun to your head.Copy !req
190. Charles, Gina, and I
are in a hostage situation.Copy !req
191. Oh God, I shouldn't
have said the gun thing.Copy !req
192. Terry regrets the way
he answered the phone.Copy !req
193. We're at Goodwin's.
There are multiple gunmen.Copy !req
194. They've blocked
all the exits,Copy !req
195. they've taken
the security guards hostage,Copy !req
196. and we're looking
for a place to hide.Copy !req
197. It's awesome.Copy !req
198. Awesome?Copy !req
199. Awesomely serious.Copy !req
200. I am not enjoying this,
no matter how much it isCopy !req
201. 100% my favorite
movie come to life.Copy !req
202. The important thing
is keep Gina safe.Copy !req
203. You have a civilian with you.
I'm on the way.Copy !req
204. Cool.
Also bring a pic of yourselfCopy !req
205. in a towel coming
out of the shower.Copy !req
206. Can't explain why, okay?
Gotta go, bye.Copy !req
207. There's a serious situation going
down they need my help with.Copy !req
208. Did one of your detectives lose
his head up his own butt?Copy !req
209. You don't even
have a job, Zeke!Copy !req
210. You know what,
I'm not supposed to be bringing this up,Copy !req
211. but I'm bringing it up!Copy !req
212. I'm sick of hearing
you "got things brewing."Copy !req
213. You ask me, the only thing
you got brewing is a pot of BS!Copy !req
214. Kids, I love you.
Sharon, you are perfect.Copy !req
215. Zeke, get a job!Copy !req
216. Okay, we should
be safe in here.Copy !req
217. This place
looks good.Copy !req
218. Good? It's great!Copy !req
219. Santa's chair.Copy !req
220. All right,
ESU's on their way.Copy !req
221. Our top priority is
keeping Gina safe.Copy !req
222. Keeping me safe?Copy !req
223. I'm gonna help you
take these guys down.Copy !req
224. No, you're not doing anything
like that. You're not a cop.Copy !req
225. I've watched what
you do for six years.Copy !req
226. It's not that difficult.Copy !req
227. "NYPD. You're under arrest."Copy !req
228. That
was clearly an impression of Charles.Copy !req
229. But stay here with him
while I do some recon.Copy !req
230. Wait, shouldn't we
all stick together?Copy !req
231. Someone has to assess
the situation, Boyle.Copy !req
232. Plus, we're trapped,
on Christmas,Copy !req
233. with a bunch of bad guys
who are very likely German.Copy !req
234. This is my
John McClane moment.Copy !req
235. Okay. You're gonna
need a tank top.Copy !req
236. You can have mine.
No need.Copy !req
237. I snagged this
on the way here.Copy !req
238. "Baby Grrl?"Copy !req
239. Yeah, they didn't
have the best selection.Copy !req
240. I'll probably
just skip the tank.Copy !req
241. Yeah.
I will return.Copy !req
242. Okay. Gina.Copy !req
243. You all right?
You look pretty cold.Copy !req
244. I'm not. I'm actually
hot.Copy !req
245. Hot, and ready to get this
super-fun thing over with.Copy !req
246. First, a toast.Copy !req
247. Great.
Let's drag this out.Copy !req
248. To the sea.Copy !req
249. To the sea!
Hear, hear!Copy !req
250. I wasn't done.Copy !req
251. Chill, Amy, let him
finish his ocean toast.Copy !req
252. Thank you, Rosa.Copy !req
253. I'm reminded of
a beloved Christmas carolCopy !req
254. by English poet
Christina Rossetti.Copy !req
255. "In the bleak mid-winter,
frosty wind made moan,Copy !req
256. "Earth stood hard as iron,
water like a stone."Copy !req
257. Moan, stone, phone.
We get it.Copy !req
258. Down the hatch.
Let's get this over with.Copy !req
259. Whee!Copy !req
260. No!Copy !req
261. Oh, my God!Copy !req
262. Excuse me, Sergeant Jeffords
with the Nine-Nine.Copy !req
263. I've got two detectives
and a civilian in there.Copy !req
264. Who's in charge?
I am, ding-dong.Copy !req
265. The Vulture?Copy !req
266. That's right.
It's me.Copy !req
267. In the flesh.Copy !req
268. Happy Kwanzaa.Copy !req
269. Oh, man.
You can't say that.Copy !req
270. Mmm.Copy !req
271. All right, let's see
what we're dealing with.Copy !req
272. I'll call you... Klaus.Copy !req
273. You will be Gunter.Copy !req
274. With the little
dots over the "U."Copy !req
275. Jurgen.Copy !req
276. Hey, Matt.
Are you in position?Copy !req
277. I'm here.Copy !req
278. Oh, great,
the bad guy's name is Matt.Copy !req
279. Hey, sorry that
took so long.Copy !req
280. Gina, you doing okay?
You scared?Copy !req
281. I'm scared you won't let me
make a flamethrowerCopy !req
282. and use it
to throw flame.Copy !req
283. You're right.
I will not do that.Copy !req
284. You're gonna stay
here and keep hiding.Copy !req
285. Boyle and I are
gonna handle this.Copy !req
286. Here's the situation.
Twelve terrorists,Copy !req
287. one cop.
Just the way he likes it.Copy !req
288. Who's he?
Me!Copy !req
289. Why are you
calling yourself "He"?Copy !req
290. Because that's the tagline
from the Die Hard poster,Copy !req
291. and also my high
school yearbook quote.Copy !req
292. I knew I recognized it.
Next time, lead with that.Copy !req
293. Right. Sorry. Also,
there aren't 12 of them.Copy !req
294. There are seven, and they're
not terrorists, they're robbers.Copy !req
295. They brought drilling
equipment to break into the safe.Copy !req
296. Okay, so it's really seven robbers,
two cops, and one Gina.Copy !req
297. Yes. Exactly.
Yeah.Copy !req
298. Where's Gina?Copy !req
299. Gina?Copy !req
300. There she is.
She went for the hairspray.Copy !req
301. She is incorrigible.Copy !req
302. Who are you? Come here. No!Copy !req
303. No, no, no, no.
Jake, they're taking Gina.Copy !req
304. Yeah,
I know. We're looking at the same thing.Copy !req
305. What? They got Gina?Copy !req
306. I told you to watch her!
I know.Copy !req
307. I am so sorry, but I promise you,
we will get her back.Copy !req
308. Oh, this is bad.Copy !req
309. I got to report
this to the Vulture.Copy !req
310. He's in charge.Copy !req
311. Oh! The Vulture?Copy !req
312. I thought he was on his
massage tour of Southeast Asia.Copy !req
313. He's leaving tomorrow.Copy !req
314. That's why he wants
this over quickly.Copy !req
315. He wants to storm
the building. No!Copy !req
316. No, no, no.
That is a bad idea.Copy !req
317. Look, we still
haven't figured outCopy !req
318. where they're holding Gina
and the rest of the hostages.Copy !req
319. If you guys come
busting in here,Copy !req
320. things could go
sideways real fast.Copy !req
321. That's what I told him,
but then he justCopy !req
322. repeated it back to
me in a lady's voice.Copy !req
323. Listen to me, Sarge.Copy !req
324. Boyle and I can take
these guys out one by oneCopy !req
325. and no one will get hurt.Copy !req
326. Just ask the Vulture
to give me some more time.Copy !req
327. He'll be reasonable.Copy !req
328. What am I talking about?
It's the Vulture.Copy !req
329. Tell him Tila Tequila's doing
a free show in Central Park.Copy !req
330. Then how come Tila
just posted a selfieCopy !req
331. from the Kid Rock
show in Daytona, bro?Copy !req
332. Yeah, I follow her. You know
what? I know what's going on here.Copy !req
333. Jake wants to go solo,
and he's trying to steal my thunder.Copy !req
334. He's inside and he has
eyes on the situation.Copy !req
335. Look, I'm in command here.
Look around you.Copy !req
336. I control all of this.Copy !req
337. You see that guy behind you?
That sniper?Copy !req
338. He'll shoot
whoever I tell him to.Copy !req
339. Even you.Copy !req
340. No, I won't.
Fine.Copy !req
341. Then, he'll sit on any
rooftop I tell him to.Copy !req
342. Hey,
go sit on that rooftop, guy.Copy !req
343. Look, just give
Jake a chance.Copy !req
344. If he fails, then you
can storm the building.Copy !req
345. I'll give him a chance to
sit on his little white buttCopy !req
346. and wait for me
to come rescue him.Copy !req
347. You tell him
that I'm Liam NeesonCopy !req
348. and he's my hot,
dumb daughter.Copy !req
349. All right, we're
outnumbered and unarmed.Copy !req
350. If we're gonna get Gina back,
we need weapons.Copy !req
351. This place sells hammers,
wrenches...Copy !req
352. Do they sell plants?Copy !req
353. Because some of that
potting soil is very toxicCopy !req
354. if ingested in
large quantities.Copy !req
355. So you want to feed
the bad guys a lot of soil?Copy !req
356. Force-feed 'em.Copy !req
357. Okay, that's a good option
that I will definitely consider.Copy !req
358. Now, let's go out there
and gear our asses up.Copy !req
359. Quietly.
Quietly.Copy !req
360. "Ho-ho-ho?"Copy !req
361. Hey, Matt.Copy !req
362. That'll teach you to have
a dumb, normal name.Copy !req
363. All right, where are you
holding the hostages?Copy !req
364. I'll bet you'd
like to know, eh?Copy !req
365. Canadian? No!Copy !req
366. You're so clearly
supposed to be German.Copy !req
367. Are any of you German?
Mmm-mmm.Copy !req
368. Russian?
Mmm-mmm.Copy !req
369. North Korean?
Mmm-mmm.Copy !req
370. Greek?
Mmm-mmm.Copy !req
371. I don't trust
the way the Greeks dance.Copy !req
372. No one does.Copy !req
373. You there?Copy !req
374. Uh, yeah, I was oot,
but now I'm back, eh?Copy !req
375. Meet me in
the service corridor.Copy !req
376. We've got
a situation with the hostages.Copy !req
377. Okey dokey,
sorry to hear aboot that.Copy !req
378. Service corridor.Copy !req
379. That was great, Jake.
Thanks.Copy !req
380. Peralta just texted. He
knows where the hostages are.Copy !req
381. He wants
15 more minutes.Copy !req
382. And I want my
lesbian neighborsCopy !req
383. to be way
hotter than they are,Copy !req
384. but we can't always
get what we want, right?Copy !req
385. I'm ordering that raid. Hey!Copy !req
386. Give that back to me.
Are you serious?Copy !req
387. I will end your career.Copy !req
388. You'll be out there
working as a modelCopy !req
389. because, well,
you know, you're shredded,Copy !req
390. and I respect that.Copy !req
391. Give me that walkie-talkie,
now.Copy !req
392. Those are my
people in there!Copy !req
393. You are not gonna
give that order!Copy !req
394. Stand down.
No.Copy !req
395. Stand down or
I'm gonna make you.Copy !req
396. Hey, you turds,
get off the roof and help me!Copy !req
397. Get off the roof!Copy !req
398. I can't do it. I'm a wimp,
just like you said.Copy !req
399. I didn't say that,
and I don't care if you go in.Copy !req
400. Be honest.
You're judging me.Copy !req
401. I'm really not.Copy !req
402. I am, a bit.Copy !req
403. No lies on Christmas.Copy !req
404. Diaz, shall we?Copy !req
405. What?Copy !req
406. Oh!Copy !req
407. Guys!Copy !req
408. Captain? Rosa?
Please hear me from land!Copy !req
409. Oh, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no, no!Copy !req
410. Oh, my God, oh, my God,
oh, my God, oh, my God!Copy !req
411. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.Copy !req
412. Welcome to the frozen...Copy !req
413. Shut your dumb
poem mouth!Copy !req
414. I'm so sorry.
No, I'm not!Copy !req
415. We have a crisis.
We have to go. Let's go.Copy !req
416. Cold, cold, cold, cold,
cold, cold, cold.Copy !req
417. How are we gonna get past them
without a gunfight?Copy !req
418. I'll tell you how
John McClane would do it.Copy !req
419. The vents.Copy !req
420. Blast the AC,
they get chilly,Copy !req
421. they leave to
find sweaters.Copy !req
422. No, we're gonna
climb through them.Copy !req
423. Even better.
Classic use of vents.Copy !req
424. Yeah.Copy !req
425. I think we're good.Copy !req
426. I don't think
we're good anymore.Copy !req
427. Who's there?
Dave, is that you?Copy !req
428. What are we gonna do?
They know we're here.Copy !req
429. No, they know I'm here.Copy !req
430. Quick, hide.
Go, go, go, go.Copy !req
431. Hey, hosers.
It's me, Dave, eh?Copy !req
432. Didn't work.Copy !req
433. Jake. Jake! Jake!Copy !req
434. Are you okay?Copy !req
435. Oh, my head hurts.Copy !req
436. Probably from
being conked on it.Copy !req
437. How are you?Copy !req
438. I'm tied up. I'm scared.Copy !req
439. This guy hasn't stopped
farting for the last hour.Copy !req
440. I keep
telling you, it's not me.Copy !req
441. Ramon, do you really
want your last words to be a lie?Copy !req
442. Those aren't gonna be your last words,
Ramon, all right?Copy !req
443. We're all
gonna be fine.Copy !req
444. They're gonna drill into the safe,
take the money, and then go.Copy !req
445. They don't need to
drill into the safe.Copy !req
446. They had my ID. They
already have all the cash.Copy !req
447. What?Copy !req
448. Then why'd they bring
all that heavy-duty equipment?Copy !req
449. So you're a cop.Copy !req
450. I hate cops.Copy !req
451. They gave me this.
Nice!Copy !req
452. Finally, a good bad guy.
This dude gets it.Copy !req
453. Now I'm
gonna kill you.Copy !req
454. Okay, you took it a little too
far. Maybe scale it back a skosh.Copy !req
455. All set down here.Copy !req
456. Okay, start loading out.Copy !req
457. I just have one piece of
business to take care of.Copy !req
458. You know, killing a man
is not as easy as it sounds.Copy !req
459. I've killed 10 men.Copy !req
460. And that's such a nice,
round number.Copy !req
461. Wouldn't you agree?
I mean, imagine.Copy !req
462. "I've killed 11 people."
It just sounds so cumbersome.Copy !req
463. Yippie kayak,
other buckets!Copy !req
464. Boyle! You did it!Copy !req
465. And you completely botched
the catchphrase.Copy !req
466. I'm pretty sure
it was right.Copy !req
467. No, but you did great.Copy !req
468. All right.Copy !req
469. Look, we have to
stop the other robbers.Copy !req
470. They're escaping
with the merch.Copy !req
471. How? Terry's got
the place surrounded.Copy !req
472. The drill.
It's not for the safe.Copy !req
473. They're using it to
tunnel out of here.Copy !req
474. And those farts
Gina kept smelling?Copy !req
475. Uh-huh.
They were Ramon.Copy !req
476. No, it was sewage.Copy !req
477. And Ramon.Copy !req
478. We have to tell Terry they're
escaping through the sewers.Copy !req
479. What's a brother got
to do to get a wet wipe?Copy !req
480. Don't say that.Copy !req
481. Merry Christmas.
Ho-ho-ho!Copy !req
482. I'm starving.Copy !req
483. "I'm starving"?
We had a thing going!Copy !req
484. Jake! I'm so
glad you're okay.Copy !req
485. Why? You were really
worried about me? Mmm-hmm.Copy !req
486. Also your face is so warm,
and I think I have hypothermia.Copy !req
487. Sergeant,
we need to talk.Copy !req
488. I'm not in trouble for what
I did to the Vulture, am I?Copy !req
489. You think people will believe
he threw himself in the garbage?Copy !req
490. No.Copy !req
491. But this was
a high-pressure situation,Copy !req
492. and you rose
to the occasion.Copy !req
493. You may have
saved lives tonight.Copy !req
494. The squad is my family,Copy !req
495. and I'll always
protect my family.Copy !req
496. Except for Zeke.Copy !req
497. That deadbeat giant
can fend for himself.Copy !req
498. There's a lieutenant's
exam coming up,Copy !req
499. and I think you
should take it.Copy !req
500. It's the next step
to becoming a captain.Copy !req
501. I didn't do anything.
It was all Jake and Charles.Copy !req
502. Mmm. Spoken
like a true captain.Copy !req
503. Also, you are
in trouble.Copy !req
504. You're suspended
one week.Copy !req
505. But you've got
a bright future.Copy !req
506. But I'll need
your badge and gun.Copy !req
507. Hey, buddy.Copy !req
508. I couldn't find the cologne
you wanted to give Amy,Copy !req
509. but I did get
a Canyon Stank giftset.Copy !req
510. It's all three Stanks,
plus the body spray.Copy !req
511. Oh, wow.
Thanks, Charles.Copy !req
512. Yeah.Copy !req
513. Look,
I didn't forget Amy's gift.Copy !req
514. I forgot yours.Copy !req
515. The Canyon Stank
was for you.Copy !req
516. What? Why didn't
you just tell me?Copy !req
517. Oh, because it would have crushed
my heart and ruined our friendship.Copy !req
518. Good call.Copy !req
519. Look, it sucks,
and I was selfish.Copy !req
520. I should have gotten you
something better. You did.Copy !req
521. You surrendered
yourself to keep me safe.Copy !req
522. Not only that, you sacrificed
your John McClane moment.Copy !req
523. It should have been you saying,
"Yippie kayak, other buckets!"Copy !req
524. I know you have the
moral high ground right now,Copy !req
525. but it still
makes me so angry.Copy !req
526. Anyways,
Merry Christmas, buddy.Copy !req
527. You, too, buddy.Copy !req
528. Gina!Copy !req
529. Hey.Copy !req
530. Hey!Copy !req
531. Hey!Copy !req
532. It works!
The flamethrower works!Copy !req
533. Yeah!
No, Gina, no!Copy !req
534. Gina, no!Copy !req
535. Somebody take her down!Copy !req