1. What you got there?
Copy !req
2. Candle, perfume, bra?
Copy !req
3. Someone's dropping off
a care package for Mom.
Copy !req
4. Ew, no.
Copy !req
5. It's the stuff that Sophia
left at my apartment.
Copy !req
6. Oh, bud. Oh, bud.
Breakups are the worst.
Copy !req
7. Man, I just wanna walk up to Sophia,
slap her in the face
Copy !req
8. and say,
"Girl, you messed up."
Copy !req
9. You need
to destroy that stuff.
Copy !req
10. You want me to crush
that big box
Copy !req
11. into a little ball
with my bare hands?
Copy !req
12. No. I'm gonna text Sophia
and give her her stuff back.
Copy !req
13. That way I'll get to
see her again
Copy !req
14. and hopefully smell
the air around her hair.
Copy !req
15. That'll make me feel better.
Copy !req
16. No, no, no, no, no, no. Okay,
you need to embrace the pain
Copy !req
17. so you can get through it.
Copy !req
18. You need catharsis.
Copy !req
19. Sarge is right!
You need to cathart.
Copy !req
20. Cathart your brains out.
Copy !req
21. Cathart all over the place.
Copy !req
22. That is a great point, guys.
Thank you.
Copy !req
23. You know who would
appreciate that a lot,
Copy !req
24. is Sophia.
I'm gonna text her.
Copy !req
25. I'm gonna take
that phone now, Jake.
Copy !req
26. I'd like to see you try.
Copy !req
27. Well, you did that
very easily.
Copy !req
28. Look, I understand
that you're trying to help,
Copy !req
29. but I promise you, the best thing
for me right now is to text Sophia.
Copy !req
30. Give me my phone? Hmm?
Copy !req
31. Thank you.
Copy !req
32. And send.
Copy !req
33. Why hasn't
she written back yet?
Copy !req
34. God, this feels terrible!
Copy !req
35. You two could have stopped this,
but you didn't, you monsters!
Copy !req
36. Hey. Any idea what this
emergency meeting is about?
Copy !req
37. Probably about how all the
cell towers in the city are broken
Copy !req
38. and that's why Sophia
hasn't texted me back.
Copy !req
39. I keep checking my phone
every three seconds like a loser.
Copy !req
40. Tread lightly, son.
Copy !req
41. Jacob, have you done
Copy !req
42. any of the catharting
exercises I gave you?
Copy !req
43. Well, I don't own a bathtub,
Copy !req
44. so the first two pages
are out.
Copy !req
45. And it's the middle of winter,
so where would I dance in a fountain?
Copy !req
46. Indoor malls, Jake.
Indoor malls.
Copy !req
47. All right, squad.
Copy !req
48. Every year, the Department
Copy !req
49. of Homeland Security
Copy !req
50. runs a multiagency
Copy !req
51. counterterrorism drill.
Copy !req
52. The team from the DOD had
to drop out at the last minute.
Copy !req
53. Thanks to our stellar scores
at last year's Tactical Village...
Copy !req
54. Nine-Nine!
Copy !req
55. They want us to fill in.
Copy !req
56. We are the only
non-federal agency ever
Copy !req
57. invited to this event.
Copy !req
58. This is a huge opportunity
and we are going to nail it.
Copy !req
59. Nine-Nine!
Yeah!
Copy !req
60. Charles,
you know what I'm thinking?
Copy !req
61. Yes, we should pack crepes
for the road.
Copy !req
62. No. This drill couldn't have
come at a better time.
Copy !req
63. I'm gonna throw myself into it
Copy !req
64. and focus solely
on getting a win,
Copy !req
65. and not whether or not
Sophia's texted me back.
Copy !req
66. Which, she hasn't,
in case anyone was wondering.
Copy !req
67. Nine-Nine!
Yeah!
Copy !req
68. I don't get it.
Copy !req
69. Santiago, Diaz.
Before you go,
Copy !req
70. both of you requested
to have this Saturday off,
Copy !req
71. but I need one of you to work.
Copy !req
72. Oh, I can take that shift.
Copy !req
73. Well, last time you worked
a Saturday,
Copy !req
74. you watched cartoons
the entire time.
Copy !req
75. Well, that's when they're on.
Copy !req
76. Work this out
and get back to me.
Copy !req
77. Sorry, I can't reschedule.
Copy !req
78. I have tickets to a TED Talk
on power poses
Copy !req
79. and getting what you want
by using your body.
Copy !req
80. Uh-oh. I hope it doesn't
get too sexual.
Copy !req
81. Uh-Oh. I Hope It Doesn't Get Too Sexual,
title of your sex tape.
Copy !req
82. But seriously,
what is taking so long?
Copy !req
83. Also the title
of your sex tape.
Copy !req
84. Well, I have plans
on Saturday, too.
Copy !req
85. I'm having dinner
with my parents.
Copy !req
86. So? You don't even like
your parents.
Copy !req
87. You call them smiley morons
and hug freaks.
Copy !req
88. Plans are plans. I'm a badass,
not an anarchist.
Copy !req
89. I don't buy it.
Copy !req
90. You know, if you told me
what you were really doing,
Copy !req
91. I'd consider
changing my plans.
Copy !req
92. But you didn't,
so I'm getting Saturday off.
Copy !req
93. Are you trying to
power pose me?
Copy !req
94. I don't know. Maybe I'm
supposed to be sitting in a chair.
Copy !req
95. This is why I need
to see the talk!
Copy !req
96. Captain, is the entire squad
at this dumb field trip?
Copy !req
97. Yes, they are.
Is there a problem?
Copy !req
98. Uh, yeah.
Copy !req
99. You know how I've been defying all
expectations by going back to school?
Copy !req
100. I always knew
you had it in you.
Copy !req
101. Can't you just
be blown away by me?
Copy !req
102. I need someone to take this
personality test for my psych class.
Copy !req
103. I was hoping to wow my
professor with a genuine psycho,
Copy !req
104. like Amy or Hitchcock
or Charles would be great.
Copy !req
105. I'm not a psycho,
but I could take your test.
Copy !req
106. That would be awesome.
Copy !req
107. I do need to warn you that the
results can be a little unflattering.
Copy !req
108. It's okay. I'm no stranger
to unflattering test results.
Copy !req
109. Your blood pressure's normal.
Copy !req
110. Normal? Take it again.
Copy !req
111. I'm not afraid to have
my flaws exposed.
Copy !req
112. But just to be clear though, it is possible
to get a result that shows no flaws?
Copy !req
113. I guess?
Good, good.
Copy !req
114. Can't wait to begin.
Copy !req
115. Did Sophia text you?
Copy !req
116. No. It was just a lightly racist
email forward from my grandma.
Copy !req
117. But, doesn't matter.
Because it's time to cathart.
Copy !req
118. Check it out.
Windbreaker City.
Copy !req
119. ATF, marshals, ICE, FBI,
Homeland Security.
Copy !req
120. Welcome to
the big leagues, Boyle.
Copy !req
121. Oh, say that again!
I want to record it
Copy !req
122. and use it as my ring tone.
Nah.
Copy !req
123. Hey, there.
Jake Peralta, NYPD.
Copy !req
124. Pleasure to meet a colleague.
Copy !req
125. Colleague?
Dude, read the jacket.
Copy !req
126. Homeland.
We're not on the same level.
Copy !req
127. Well, that was
incredibly rude.
Copy !req
128. No, no, no, no.
I've always admired people
Copy !req
129. who decided what they wanted
to be when they were six years old
Copy !req
130. and never wavered.
Copy !req
131. Bus drivers, ice cream men,
princesses.
Copy !req
132. So when exactly
did you decide
Copy !req
133. you wanted to be a butt?
Was it college?
Copy !req
134. Law school. Just wanted to let
you know that I went to law school.
Copy !req
135. At Butt University?
Copy !req
136. What are you doing?
Copy !req
137. I'm standing up for us.
Copy !req
138. Don't worry about it.
That guy doesn't matter.
Copy !req
139. All right,
everybody. Take their seats.
Copy !req
140. My name is Agent Kendrick,
Homeland Security,
Copy !req
141. and I am in charge here.
Copy !req
142. Sarge, I was wrong.
He totally matters.
Copy !req
143. This year's scenario,
terrorists have stormed
Copy !req
144. the Capitol Trust Bank building
and have taken hostages.
Copy !req
145. Nice.
Copy !req
146. Oh. Cool trick.
Copy !req
147. I don't have a ton of free
time to practice high-fiving.
Copy !req
148. You just made fun of us
for that.
Copy !req
149. For practicing. That's the
first time we've ever tried it.
Copy !req
150. Here are your assignments.
Copy !req
151. ATF, you will be
our terrorists.
Copy !req
152. Oof. That's a rough draw.
Copy !req
153. Homeland Security,
you are command control.
Copy !req
154. Marshals, strike team alpha.
Copy !req
155. And NYPD...
Copy !req
156. Helicopter snipers,
helicopter snipers.
Copy !req
157. Says here you will
be our hostages.
Copy !req
158. What? So you just want us
to lie on the ground
Copy !req
159. and do nothing
like a bunch of losers?
Copy !req
160. Yes. Precisely.
Copy !req
161. No!
Jackpot!
Copy !req
162. Oh, can you leave me
some wiggle room
Copy !req
163. so I can check
my phone periodically?
Copy !req
164. Why? You waiting
for your mom to text?
Copy !req
165. No, actually. I'm waiting for a
girl who broke up with me to text.
Copy !req
166. That's way worse.
Yeah. It's bad.
Copy !req
167. This sucks.
Copy !req
168. I just got dumped by a
mega fox
Copy !req
169. and no one's letting me
shoot a big gun about it!
Copy !req
170. All right, you know what?
Screw this.
Copy !req
171. I'm not gonna just sit here
like a loser.
Copy !req
172. Boyle, free me,
then I'll free you. We're fighting back.
Copy !req
173. No, Jake.
Copy !req
174. We are behaving so we can
be invited again next year.
Copy !req
175. Sarge, with all due respect,
Copy !req
176. I am going to completely
ignore everything you just said.
Copy !req
177. Okay, Charles.
Our hands are tied,
Copy !req
178. so we're gonna have
to use our mouths.
Copy !req
179. Smart. Wet the tape down with
my saliva until you can slip right out.
Copy !req
180. No! Bite it!
Obviously bite it!
Copy !req
181. I don't like it.
Something stinks.
Copy !req
182. Well, I'm sorry,
but I refuse to mask
Copy !req
183. my natural musk
with a bunch of chemicals.
Copy !req
184. Ugh. I was talking to Rosa about
her "dinner" with her "parents."
Copy !req
185. I am having dinner
with my parents.
Copy !req
186. Okay, liar.
What restaurant you going to?
Copy !req
187. I don't know.
Some Italian place.
Copy !req
188. Oh, Italian?
Makes sense, Pinocchio.
Copy !req
189. He's a liar, too.
And Italian.
Copy !req
190. I overexplained it.
Copy !req
191. Okay, last question. What body
of water do you most identify with?
Copy !req
192. A, lake. B, river. C, ocean.
Copy !req
193. Oh, they can't be serious.
Of course I choose ocean.
Copy !req
194. I hate the ocean. That's where
that stuck up bitch Rose let Leo die.
Copy !req
195. There was plenty of room
on that door!
Copy !req
196. Okay, the computer is
tabulating.
Copy !req
197. Oh!
Copy !req
198. You got category I9C3G6.
Copy !req
199. I9C3G6.
Copy !req
200. Is that as good as it sounds?
Copy !req
201. You have a robust
sense of self
Copy !req
202. and are well suited
to leadership positions.
Copy !req
203. strength,
determination, tenacity.
Copy !req
204. Yes.
I suppose that's accurate.
Copy !req
205. They do call me Tenacious
Ray down at the country club
Copy !req
206. because for the past 10 years,
I've been suing them for discrimination.
Copy !req
207. I am very pleased
with this assessment.
Copy !req
208. You should be.
Copy !req
209. I took the test, too,
and I also got an I9C3G6.
Copy !req
210. What?
Copy !req
211. We got the same score?
Copy !req
212. It's just crazy
how accurate this thing is.
Copy !req
213. Yes. Crazy.
Copy !req
214. All right,
Sarge, now to cut you loose.
Copy !req
215. No. I'm staying tied up.
Copy !req
216. I don't care how much
of a jerk Kendrick is.
Copy !req
217. I want it to be clear
I had no part in this.
Copy !req
218. No offense, but you are
a huge waste of muscles.
Copy !req
219. Okay, Boyle. There's two
guards outside this door
Copy !req
220. and we need their guns. You
know what to do. Beat 'em up?
Copy !req
221. Pretend to be sick and lure
them in here. Right. The Charles.
Copy !req
222. There we go.
Copy !req
223. Help! I need help!
I'm sick!
Copy !req
224. Is this part of
the drill? What's wrong?
Copy !req
225. I have Seasonal
Affective Disorder! What?
Copy !req
226. It's a serious condition that
affects millions of Americans.
Copy !req
227. What the hell?
Copy !req
228. We're fighting back,
you terrorist crap sack.
Copy !req
229. Also, thank you for
including us in this event.
Copy !req
230. You got a partner outside,
right? Call him in here.
Copy !req
231. I need help.
Copy !req
232. Ow!
Shh.
Copy !req
233. You're dead.
See you later, losers.
Copy !req
234. Again, opportunity of a lifetime.
Just a real positive experience.
Copy !req
235. All right.
We need to distract them.
Copy !req
236. Do you have anything
I can throw?
Copy !req
237. I have a dog tag.
Wow. That is badass, Boyle.
Copy !req
238. Nope, it's an actual tag
for a dog.
Copy !req
239. Yup,
Molly. She was my poodle growing up.
Copy !req
240. You never forget your first.
Copy !req
241. Your first what?
Copy !req
242. Dog. That is never what
people mean by that!
Copy !req
243. When you get to hell,
say hi to Molly.
Copy !req
244. What? Why is Molly in hell?
Copy !req
245. 'Cause it sounds cooler
than heaven.
Copy !req
246. Hiya!
Copy !req
247. Door kick.
Copy !req
248. What's up, dude?
Is it lunchtime?
Copy !req
249. Is the drill over?
We're freeing you guys.
Copy !req
250. Jake, can you hear me?
Is it lunchtime?
Copy !req
251. No it's not lunchtime.
It's 10:30 in the morning!
Copy !req
252. No wonder I'm starving.
Copy !req
253. Look. We came here to win and
they're not even giving us a chance.
Copy !req
254. I think it's fair to say that no
one in the history of America
Copy !req
255. has been
discriminated against more.
Copy !req
256. Buddy. Yeah. That's
my adrenaline talking.
Copy !req
257. So, you guys in? I don't know.
I don't want to get in trouble.
Copy !req
258. Oh, wow.
You sound like a real Terry.
Copy !req
259. Why don't you just take your shirt off
and make your pecs bounce around.
Copy !req
260. Again, the adrenaline.
Don't sue me.
Copy !req
261. Look, you two are still arguing
about who gets Saturday off, right?
Copy !req
262. Highest body count wins?
Copy !req
263. Done. I'm gonna
vape you like my e-cig.
Copy !req
264. Okay, you basically just lost.
Copy !req
265. Nine-Nine, we are hostages
no longer.
Copy !req
266. Oh. Really meant to rip off the
whole thing, but I say we go with it!
Copy !req
267. Come with me, hos!
Copy !req
268. Two-one, Diaz.
Copy !req
269. Four-two, Santiago.
Copy !req
270. Jake, this is great. I shot a guy
in the face! He is so mad at me!
Copy !req
271. Nice. All right, this hallway's
clear. I think we killed 'em all.
Copy !req
272. It's a regular paint bath.
Like bubble bath.
Copy !req
273. No! Like blood bath.
Yeah. Right.
Copy !req
274. Meet in the basement.
Here we go!
Copy !req
275. Yeah! Ow.
Copy !req
276. Okay, me and Boyle
took down six,
Copy !req
277. Rosa and Amy got 14!
Copy !req
278. Hitchcock and Scully...
Were killed immediately.
Copy !req
279. Yeah, we're dead.
Copy !req
280. We also disarmed and
captured all these guys.
Copy !req
281. So, is that all
the terrorists?
Copy !req
282. Not quite. Drop your weapons,
everybody. Drop 'em right now.
Copy !req
283. It's over. You lost.
Copy !req
284. Drop 'em now or this...
Copy !req
285. You're dead, crap sack.
Copy !req
286. All right, Sarge!
Copy !req
287. You decided to be cool!
Copy !req
288. I'm always cool!
Copy !req
289. I also couldn't spend
another second
Copy !req
290. listening to those ATF wads
bitch and moan.
Copy !req
291. Leave it to the NYPD
to screw up being hostages.
Copy !req
292. I thought cops loved
to sit around
Copy !req
293. on their fat asses all day
and do nothing.
Copy !req
294. That's it!
Ahhh!
Copy !req
295. Whoa!
My ass is not fat!
Copy !req
296. It kind of sounds like it was
just about your weight issues.
Copy !req
297. I'm not gonna lie,
that did strike a chord.
Copy !req
298. But I also didn't like the stuff
they were saying about us.
Copy !req
299. Look, I'm proud
to be a cop!
Copy !req
300. This drill is over. Let's get the
hell out of here. Drinks on me!
Copy !req
301. Nine-Nine!
Yeah!
Copy !req
302. Oh, my God. It worked.
Copy !req
303. Let's go.
Copy !req
304. And nothing from Sophia.
Copy !req
305. Uh, whoa, whoa, whoa. Um,
we're not quite finished yet.
Copy !req
306. I know I, for one,
am not done kicking bootay.
Copy !req
307. Dude, there's no more
terrorists.
Copy !req
308. No, but there is more
catharting to do.
Copy !req
309. We could make everyone regret ever
taping us to chairs in the first place.
Copy !req
310. Sarge? It seems unnecessary
to piss everyone off.
Copy !req
311. I heard one of the marshals
call you Jiggly Jeffords.
Copy !req
312. What?
Give me another clip!
Copy !req
313. Now we're talking.
You two are tied, right?
Copy !req
314. Yeah. Mmm-hmm.
Settle that score.
Copy !req
315. Jake, what do you say?
Wanna go after the marshals
Copy !req
316. and this butt from Homeland?
Copy !req
317. Get yourself a real win?
Copy !req
318. I don't know, Boyle.
I mean, they're the good guys.
Copy !req
319. I mean, that would make us
the bad guys.
Copy !req
320. Nice.
So you're in?
Copy !req
321. Oh, I'm in.
I'm in all the way to hell.
Copy !req
322. And when I get there,
I'm gonna see your dog Molly!
Copy !req
323. Let's go, squad!
Copy !req
324. That was really unnecessary.
Copy !req
325. Jake, come outside.
I have Kendrick here.
Copy !req
326. Peralta, what are you doing?
You're NYPD.
Copy !req
327. You're supposed
to be hostages.
Copy !req
328. Supposed to be, but we rose
up and took down the terrorists.
Copy !req
329. That's right.
We're the bad guys now.
Copy !req
330. Is this some sort of
game to you?
Copy !req
331. Does this sound like a game?
Copy !req
332. I am a terrorist leader.
My name is Francis Gruber.
Copy !req
333. My brother Hans died in Nakatomi
Tower at the hands of John McClane.
Copy !req
334. Also, I'm related to Jeremy
Irons from the third one.
Copy !req
335. Okay, so it is a game.
Copy !req
336. Well, I'm not playing.
Drill's over.
Copy !req
337. Drill's over, boys.
Copy !req
338. Yeah. That sounds right.
We're not on the same level.
Copy !req
339. And apparently, you're at
the level that can't handle us.
Copy !req
340. You trying to
goad me, Peralta?
Copy !req
341. 'Cause I'm in charge here and I
don't have to engage with mall cops.
Copy !req
342. But I will.
Say it. Don't spray it.
Copy !req
343. I'm in.
What are your demands?
Copy !req
344. A guarantee that this drill
doesn't end until one of us is dead.
Copy !req
345. Also, one large pizza
with fennel sausage,
Copy !req
346. brick oven,
otherwise it's sog city.
Copy !req
347. And Scully needs some Gasonex,
extra strength.
Copy !req
348. Chewable! Okay.
So a fight to the death, pizza,
Copy !req
349. and Gasonex?
Chewable!
Copy !req
350. You have 30 minutes
to meet our demands.
Copy !req
351. After that, we paintball
a hostage every 15 minutes.
Copy !req
352. You've got yourself
a deal, Gruber.
Copy !req
353. Get us those demands.
We'll be waiting.
Copy !req
354. We're not waiting one second.
Copy !req
355. Those demands were a ruse.
Copy !req
356. They were?
I really need that Gasonex.
Copy !req
357. I think there was some dairy in the
cheesecake that I ate for breakfast.
Copy !req
358. We're not gonna hang
around like sitting ducks.
Copy !req
359. We're gonna take
the fight to them,
Copy !req
360. like some waddling ducks.
Copy !req
361. If the waddling
was super fast and cool.
Copy !req
362. Like some boss-ass penguins.
Yes!
Copy !req
363. I'm so glad you're back
on our side, Sarge!
Copy !req
364. Okay. Let's destroy
some good guys.
Copy !req
365. Gina, I was outside
on business,
Copy !req
366. and I purchased a box of assorted
sweet treats. I give you the first pick.
Copy !req
367. Don't mind if I doodle.
Copy !req
368. Curious. On your
personality test,
Copy !req
369. you said your favorite shape
was a square.
Copy !req
370. And yet now,
when you're given a choice
Copy !req
371. between round cookies
and square bloodies,
Copy !req
372. you opt for the cookie.
You opt for the circle.
Copy !req
373. Yes, but it's not
about shapes.
Copy !req
374. I'm choosing a cookie
over a blondie.
Copy !req
375. I'm whimsical,
but I'm not a lunatic.
Copy !req
376. Well, butter, eggs, flour, sugar,
baking soda, chocolate, salt, vanilla.
Copy !req
377. The basic building blocks
are identical.
Copy !req
378. The only salient difference,
Copy !req
379. their shape.
Copy !req
380. You're trying to get me
bumped out of I9C3G6.
Copy !req
381. You don't like that the test
put us in the same category.
Copy !req
382. That is so rude.
Copy !req
383. Do you know how many
basic bitches would kill
Copy !req
384. to have the same
personality as me?
Copy !req
385. Gina, you know I appreciate you,
but you have to admit,
Copy !req
386. we're not exactly cut
from the same cloth.
Copy !req
387. Apparently not. I,
of course, am exotic silk,
Copy !req
388. whereas you, sir,
are snakeskin.
Copy !req
389. So you can keep your box of
deception and leave me alone.
Copy !req
390. It's a box of shapes and
it contains only the truth.
Copy !req
391. Oh!
Copy !req
392. Fennel sausage.
Jake, they did it!
Copy !req
393. Balcony's over there.
Copy !req
394. How many are out there?
Copy !req
395. Six marshals.
We're pinned down.
Copy !req
396. Great. It's over,
and we're still tied eight-eight.
Copy !req
397. What the hell?
Nine-eight. Saturday's mine!
Copy !req
398. You said body count,
you didn't say whose body. Boom!
Copy !req
399. Power pose!
Copy !req
400. Argh!
Copy !req
401. Aw.
Copy !req
402. Mmm.
Copy !req
403. They got me.
I'm dead, too.
Copy !req
404. Kendrick! Come out!
Copy !req
405. It's just you and me.
Copy !req
406. Okay,
okay. I'm out of ammo. Be cool.
Copy !req
407. Well, well, well.
Hello, Agent.
Copy !req
408. You don't actually have to shoot
me. We can just say that you won.
Copy !req
409. But I wanna shoot you.
Copy !req
410. No way. This is brick oven.
Copy !req
411. They were playing us, Jake.
Copy !req
412. Right,
you're having a moment.
Copy !req
413. So, any last words?
Copy !req
414. Just don't shoot me
in the face.
Copy !req
415. I've got a date tonight
and I don't want it to puff up.
Copy !req
416. I'm already 10 pounds heavier
than the picture she saw.
Copy !req
417. Okay. Uh, just to clarify,
those are your last words?
Copy !req
418. Because I'm about to
shoot you...
Copy !req
419. Ow!
Copy !req
420. What? No!
Copy !req
421. Gun taped to the back.
Copy !req
422. All these Die Hard references
gave me the idea.
Copy !req
423. I got John McClane'd.
Copy !req
424. That is so much worse
than any paintball.
Copy !req
425. Interesting tactic,
detectives.
Copy !req
426. Show up at your first interagency
drill and mess the whole thing up.
Copy !req
427. Less of a tactic, and more of
a series of incredible events.
Copy !req
428. And what was
the most incredible event?
Copy !req
429. When I shot you in front
of all your friends?
Copy !req
430. I have
other friends. Who?
Copy !req
431. I knew it was a dumb idea to
invite the NYPD to a federal drill.
Copy !req
432. Seriously, man?
Copy !req
433. You took all our guns, taped us
to a bunch of chairs, called us fat,
Copy !req
434. and we still took
almost all of you out.
Copy !req
435. Next year,
we're winning this thing.
Copy !req
436. Oh, you're not
coming next year.
Copy !req
437. But maybe I'll see you at
the Pentagon Christmas party.
Copy !req
438. Oh, right. You guys
aren't invited to those.
Copy !req
439. Kid Rock was there.
Copy !req
440. Those are my last words, bro.
Copy !req
441. Man, he is just
a really bad dude.
Copy !req
442. Jake, I'm sorry
you didn't get your win.
Copy !req
443. Are you kidding?
This was a total win.
Copy !req
444. I haven't checked
my phone in forever.
Copy !req
445. Now that I've said that,
I do kind of wanna check it though.
Copy !req
446. I'm gonna just do it.
Copy !req
447. No text, but I'm probably
20% less devastated
Copy !req
448. than I would've been this morning.
And that's thanks to you guys.
Copy !req
449. I catharted.
Copy !req
450. You catharted hard.
Copy !req
451. Gina, I've been thinking long and
hard about what happened yesterday.
Copy !req
452. Oh, pray tell. But remember, I'm not
at your level, so do speak down to me.
Copy !req
453. I owe you an apology.
Copy !req
454. The test was wrong to
classify us both as I9C3G6s.
Copy !req
455. That's a terrible apology,
from content to tone.
Copy !req
456. I meant I don't deserve
to be an I9C3G6.
Copy !req
457. I should be an I9C3G4
or an I8C5G3.
Copy !req
458. Or even an I7C7G8.
Or I2C1G3.
Copy !req
459. Is this a Rain Man impression?
Copy !req
460. No.
Oh.
Copy !req
461. Those are all personality types
not well suited to leadership,
Copy !req
462. just as I have not been.
Copy !req
463. A good leader should never
diminish those around him.
Copy !req
464. It was devastating.
Copy !req
465. Gina, you're tenacious,
you're strong,
Copy !req
466. you're a great leader,
and most importantly,
Copy !req
467. any basic bitch
would be lucky to be like you.
Copy !req
468. Apology accepted.
Copy !req
469. Can I have a huge raise?
Copy !req
470. No, but I am expanding your responsibilities
to match your great promise.
Copy !req
471. You are now in charge of all scheduling
decisions and budget tracking.
Copy !req
472. No! You can do it. Trust me.
Copy !req
473. From one I9C3G6
to another.
Copy !req
474. It's crazy how much
he flirts with me.
Copy !req
475. Hey. So, I told Captain
Holt I'd work on Saturday.
Copy !req
476. Wait, why?
You won, fair and square.
Copy !req
477. I mean, I murdered you.
That was pretty shady.
Copy !req
478. Also, it was crazy assertive
Copy !req
479. and I feel like maybe I don't
actually need power pose training.
Copy !req
480. You don't. Mostly because
nobody needs power pose training.
Copy !req
481. The dinner with my parents on
Saturday is to introduce them to Marcus.
Copy !req
482. What?
Copy !req
483. Why didn't you just tell me? I didn't
know stuff was getting that serious.
Copy !req
484. Yeah. It's very embarrassing,
having feelings.
Copy !req
485. Anyway, thank you.
Copy !req
486. You're welcome.
Copy !req
487. Rosa's in love!
Copy !req
488. Power pose.
Copy !req
489. Dropping this off
for Sophia Perez.
Copy !req
490. Oh, no.
You don't have to call her.
Copy !req
491. I'll just leave it here
with you.
Copy !req
492. Jake?
Copy !req
493. Hey.
Hi.
Copy !req
494. Uh, sorry I didn't
text you back.
Copy !req
495. Thanks for bringing my things.
Copy !req
496. Well, I need to move on, and having this
stuff around makes that difficult. So...
Copy !req
497. Including this
multi-surface cleaner?
Copy !req
498. Well, I only bought that to
impress you. And it worked.
Copy !req
499. All right.
Well, I should probably
Copy !req
500. get back
to arresting bad guys.
Copy !req
501. Yeah. I should, uh,
Copy !req
502. get back to proving
they're not so bad.
Copy !req
503. Jake and Sophia.
Enemies for life.
Copy !req
504. Like McClane and Gruber.
Copy !req
505. You're the Gruber.
Copy !req
506. You're the Gruber.
Copy !req
507. I'll see you in court, Jake.
Copy !req
508. Okay. Bye.
Copy !req
509. Tell me if she turns
back for one last look.
Copy !req
510. Is she turning?
Copy !req
511. Did she turn?
Did she turn?
Copy !req