1. - NICE AND QUIET
WITH NO WORK TO DO.Copy !req
2. JUST THE WAY I LIKE IT.Copy !req
3. IT'S SO BORING HERE.Copy !req
4. ALL MY FINELY TUNED
CRIME-FIGHTING SKILLSCopy !req
5. ARE GOING TO WASTE.Copy !req
6. FINALLY, A LITTLE ACTION.Copy !req
7. FREEZE,
YOU PIECE OF SHIT!Copy !req
8. - I JUST MISSED THE TRASH CAN.
I WAS ABOUT TO PICK IT UP.Copy !req
9. - SHUT UP, SCUMBAG.Copy !req
10. WE'VE GOT
A, UH, 371-261.Copy !req
11. - YOU GOT
A LITTER BUG RAPIST?Copy !req
12. - OH, A RAPIST TOO, HUH?Copy !req
13. PROCEEDING
WITH EXTREME PREJUDICE.Copy !req
14. whack!
- OW, OW, OW!Copy !req
15. - STEVE!Copy !req
16. - [high-pitched]
OW, OW, OW!Copy !req
17. OW!Copy !req
18. - DAD, YOU BUSTED MORE CRIMINALS
IN THIS PARK THAN ANY RANGER.Copy !req
19. I'LL FIND A WAY
TO MAKE YOU PROUD,Copy !req
20. STARTING NOW.Copy !req
21. STARTING NOW.Copy !req
22. AH, IT.Copy !req
23. GROSS.
WHAT'S THAT SMELL?Copy !req
24. - UH, IT'S BEEN ABOUT FIVE DAYS
SINCE I TOOK A SHOWER.Copy !req
25. - WHAT?
WHY?Copy !req
26. - I'M GOING TO THE GYNO
NEXT WEEK,Copy !req
27. AND I WANT HIM
TO EARN HIS MONEY.Copy !req
28. - WHAT HAPPENED, WOODY?Copy !req
29. - YOU BEEN BACKING UP
TO GLORY HOLES AGAIN?Copy !req
30. - NO, I GOT
A GODDAMN HEMORRHOID.Copy !req
31. FEELS LIKE
I'M TAKING IT UP THE ASSCopy !req
32. FROM A GINSU KNIFE.Copy !req
33. - NOW IT'S TIME
ONCE AGAIN FOR...Copy !req
34. THE BRICKLEBERRY
CRIME REPORT.Copy !req
35. - THIS AGAIN?Copy !req
36. - I THOUGHT MY HEMORRHOID
WAS A PAIN IN THE ASS.Copy !req
37. - THERE IS...Copy !req
38. NO CRIME TO REPORT.Copy !req
39. - HAVEN'T SEEN THAT MUCH BUILDUP
FOR A SHITTY REVEALCopy !req
40. SINCE EVERY
M. NIGHT SHYAMALAN MOVIE.Copy !req
41. - IT'S NOT MY FAULT
NOTHING EVER HAPPENS HERE.Copy !req
42. - IT'S A NATIONAL PARK.
IT'S SUPPOSED TO BE BORING.Copy !req
43. IF YOU WANT SOME ACTION,
GO BE A COP.Copy !req
44. - MAYBE I WILL.Copy !req
45. THEY LOVE ME
DOWN AT THE STATION.Copy !req
46. - I LOVE YOU, BUDDY,Copy !req
47. BUT THERE'S NO WAY
THEY'D LET YOU BE A COP.Copy !req
48. - DON'T FEEL BAD, STEVE.
YOU'RE JUST STUPID.Copy !req
49. - I AM NOT STUPID.
- OH, YEAH?Copy !req
50. WELL, HOW ABOUT THE TIME
YOU "SAVED US"Copy !req
51. FROM THE ZOMBIE APOCALYPSE?Copy !req
52. - WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
53. WE'RE FILMING A TV SHOW,
YOU IDIOT!Copy !req
54. - NICE TRY, WOODY,Copy !req
55. BUT I DON'T TAKE
THAT FORM OF PAYMENT ANYMORE.Copy !req
56. - WHAT?
- ALL RIGHT, WOODY.Copy !req
57. LAST TIME,
BUT FROM NOW ON,Copy !req
58. YOU WRITE A CHECK
LIKE EVERYONE ELSE.Copy !req
59. - NO, YOU LUNATIC,
I'VE GOT A HEMORRHOID.Copy !req
60. - HMM, WHY DIDN'T YOU SAY SO,
WOODY?Copy !req
61. NOBODY LIKES A COCKTEASE.
- JUST HACK THIS THING OFF.Copy !req
62. IT'S KILLING ME.
- SURE THING, WOODY.Copy !req
63. I'LL CHOP THIS RHOID OFF
FASTER THAN YOU CAN SAY—Copy !req
64. JESUS CHRIST!
- OH, NO, IS IT THAT BAD?Copy !req
65. - NO, YOU HAVE THE FACE
OF JESUS CHRISTCopy !req
66. ON YOUR HEMORRHOID.Copy !req
67. OH, NO, THIS EPISCOPALIAN'S
NOT TOUCHING THAT THING.Copy !req
68. - DON'T BE SILLY.
IT'S JUST A COINCIDENCE.Copy !req
69. YOU GOT TO CUT IT OFF
FOR ME, DOC.Copy !req
70. I CAN'T EVEN SIT DOWN.Copy !req
71. - OH, I WOULD NEVER
COMMIT BLASPHEMY, WOODY.Copy !req
72. NOW, GO TO YOUR GODDAMN HOUSE
AND SIT ON THE FACE OF JESUS.Copy !req
73. - SO I KICKED THE DOOR IN
AND EMPTIED MY GLOCKCopy !req
74. INTO THOSE TWO CRACKHEADS.Copy !req
75. SO I GUESS YOU DIDN'T READ THEM
THEIR RIGHTS.Copy !req
76. - SURE, I DID.
THEIR LAST RITES.Copy !req
77. - [snorting, laughing]Copy !req
78. - WILLIAMS, WHAT THE HELL
ARE YOU DOING HERE?Copy !req
79. - I MADE AN ARREST.Copy !req
80. SICK BASTARD
WAS SHITTING IN THE WOODS.Copy !req
81. I PUT HIM
IN A HOLDING CELL FOR YOU.Copy !req
82. - OH, NO!Copy !req
83. - I WAS HOPING YOU GUYS
COULD PUT ME ON A FEW CASES.Copy !req
84. THINGS HAVE BEEN KIND OF SLOW
AT THE PARK.Copy !req
85. - OH, SURE.Copy !req
86. WHY DON'T YOU GO TALK
TO CHIEF PIERCE?Copy !req
87. HE LOVES IT WHEN PEOPLE
INTERRUPT HIS HOBBY TIME.Copy !req
88. - THANKS FOR THE TIP, BRIGGS.Copy !req
89. CHIEF PIERCE!
- OH!Copy !req
90. I'M LOOMING HERE.Copy !req
91. SON OF A BITCH!Copy !req
92. YOU KNOW HOW LONG IT TOOK ME
TO MAKE THAT BRACELET?Copy !req
93. - I WANT TO BE A COP, DADDY.Copy !req
94. - WELL, SON, PUT YOUR TICKET
IN THIS RAFFLE,Copy !req
95. AND MAYBE YOU WILL.Copy !req
96. - HEY, WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
97. - JUST FILLING THESE OUT
FOR MY KIDS.Copy !req
98. - HOW MANY KIDS
DO YOU HAVE?Copy !req
99. 150?Copy !req
100. MY WIFE'S VAGINA LOOKS LIKE
A POPPED WATER BED.Copy !req
101. - HEY, I WASN'T DONE
WITH THAT.Copy !req
102. - OW, AH, OW.Copy !req
103. OH, YEAH.Copy !req
104. - KEEP IT.Copy !req
105. - I CAN'T BELIEVE
THAT NO DOCTOR IN TOWNCopy !req
106. WOULD OPERATE
ON MY MUSHROOMING MESSIAH.Copy !req
107. BUNCH OF RELIGIOUS KOOKS
SEEING JESUS EVERYWHERE.Copy !req
108. WATER STAINS,
BURNT TOAST,Copy !req
109. NOW MY BALLOON KNOT.Copy !req
110. - THE LORD WORKS
IN MYSTERIOUS WAYS.Copy !req
111. - DID YOU FIND OUT ANYTHING
ON WEBMDCopy !req
112. WITH THAT PICTURE YOU TOOK
OF MY SO CALLED HOLY HEMORRHOID?Copy !req
113. - NO, BUT IT'S ALREADY GOT
7,000 RETWEETS.Copy !req
114. - WHAT?
- CALM DOWN.Copy !req
115. I TAGGED YOU.Copy !req
116. - JESU CHRISTO.Copy !req
117. LET US SEE HIM.
- HEY, HEY!Copy !req
118. WHAT ARE YOU DOING, LADY?Copy !req
119. YOU CAN'T WORSHIP
MY TURD GUTTER!Copy !req
120. - AND THE WINNER
OF OUR LITTLE COP FOR A DAY ISCopy !req
121. STEVE WILLIAMS.Copy !req
122. AW.Copy !req
123. - YEAH!
SUCK IT, LOSERS.Copy !req
124. - JESUS CHRIST.
ALL RIGHT.Copy !req
125. EVERYBODY GIVE
LITTLE OFFICER WILLIAMSCopy !req
126. A WARM WELCOME.Copy !req
127. BOO!Copy !req
128. - THANK YOU.
IT'S AN HONOR.Copy !req
129. - BRIGGS, CUT IT OUT.Copy !req
130. JUST FOR THAT,
WILLIAMS WILL BE YOUR PARTNERCopy !req
131. FOR THE DAY.Copy !req
132. - YEAH, BUT—BUT, CHIEF.
- BRIGGS!Copy !req
133. THAT'S AN ORDER.
- COME ON, PARTNER.Copy !req
134. LET'S GO FIGHT
SOME CRIME.Copy !req
135. - TELL ME WHO YOU WORK FOR.
- LET ME HANDLE THIS.Copy !req
136. WHAT?Copy !req
137. I THOUGHT WE WERE PLAYING
GOOD COP/GAY COP.Copy !req
138. I CAN BREAK HIM.Copy !req
139. WHOO-HOO!Copy !req
140. NO RUBBERS, NO DUCT TAPE,
NO ROOFIES?Copy !req
141. WHAT KIND OF RAPE KIT
IS THIS?Copy !req
142. HMM, WHAT IS THAT?Copy !req
143. JESUS!
JESUS!Copy !req
144. - PLEASE, BLESS MY SICK CHILD.Copy !req
145. - I HAVEN'T SEEN
THIS MANY SCREAMING MEXICANSCopy !req
146. SINCE BUS PASSES
WENT UP.Copy !req
147. - THIS IS YOUR FAULT, MALLOY.Copy !req
148. - WHY DON'T YOU JUST
SHOW IT TO THEM?Copy !req
149. - NO, THERE'S NO WAY
I'M SHOWINGCopy !req
150. MY DISGUSTING HEMORRHOID
TO ANYBODY.Copy !req
151. I BOUGHT THIS CREAM
TO SHRINK THE BASTARD.Copy !req
152. - OH, JESU CHRISTO.
DIOS MIO.Copy !req
153. DIOS MIO.
JESU CHRISTO.Copy !req
154. DIOS MIO.Copy !req
155. JESU CHRISTO.Copy !req
156. - GOD DAMN IT!Copy !req
157. JUST A LITTLE BLESSING.Copy !req
158. - THAT'S IT!Copy !req
159. I'M GONNA SAW THIS THING OFF
MYSELF.Copy !req
160. - DON'T DO THAT, MY SON.
- HUH?Copy !req
161. WHO SAID THAT?
- IT IS I, JESUS.Copy !req
162. NOW, I WANT YOU TO SHOW MY FACE
TO THE PEOPLE.Copy !req
163. SPREAD THE WORD
BY SPREADING YOUR CHEEKS.Copy !req
164. - WHATSOEVER THOU SAYETH,
MY LORD.Copy !req
165. - THANK YOU, JESUS VOICE APP
LITE VERSION.Copy !req
166. WHERE MY HOS AT?Copy !req
167. - SHOULDN'T WE CHECK THAT OUT?Copy !req
168. - NOT IF YOU WANT
TO LIVE, ROOKIE.Copy !req
169. NO COP HAS EVER BEEN ABLE
TO TAKE DOWN THE SATAN'S BFFs.Copy !req
170. - SO YOU'RE AFRAID
OF THOSE GUYS?Copy !req
171. - WATCH YOUR MOUTH,
WILLIAMS.Copy !req
172. I'M THE TOUGHEST COP
ON THE FORCE.Copy !req
173. IF I WASN'T, YOU THINK
CHIEF WOULD'VE GIVEN ME THIS?Copy !req
174. - WHOA.Copy !req
175. OH, MAN.Copy !req
176. I'VE ONLY GOT TEN MORE MINUTES
AS A COP.Copy !req
177. I WANT TO DO
SOMETHING COOL.Copy !req
178. - I'VE GOT THE PERFECT
LAST ASSIGNMENTCopy !req
179. FOR YOU, WILLIAMS.Copy !req
180. EH, GO BUY ME A COFFEECopy !req
181. AND A HOT DOG.Copy !req
182. STUPID BRIGGS.Copy !req
183. HEY!Copy !req
184. COOL SKI MASK.
- HANDS UP, PIG!Copy !req
185. - HOLY CRAP!Copy !req
186. - BRIGGS,
YOU TAKING A NAP?Copy !req
187. I JUST GOT AN URGENT TEXT
FROM MY FAT WIFE,Copy !req
188. WHO I LOVE VERY, VERY MUCH.Copy !req
189. SHE'S IN THAT STORE
BEING HELD HOSTAGE.Copy !req
190. EITHER THAT
OR SHE SMELLED SAUSAGE.Copy !req
191. IT'S HARD FOR HER TO TEXT
WITH HER FAT FINGERS.Copy !req
192. - WHAT?
I JUST SENT WILLIAMS IN THERE.Copy !req
193. - WILLIAMS?
SOMEBODY CALL THE FUNERAL HOME.Copy !req
194. TELL 'EM TO GET
A KING-SIZED CASKETCopy !req
195. AND A TUB OF BUTTER
TO SQUEEZE HER FAT ASS IN THERE.Copy !req
196. - BETTER CANCEL
THAT ORDER, CHIEF.Copy !req
197. - WILLIAMS, MY FAT WIFE—
YOU SAVED HER.Copy !req
198. THANK GOD.Copy !req
199. - GLAD I COULD DO
SOMETHING RIGHTCopy !req
200. DURING MY LAST FEW MINUTES
AS A COP.Copy !req
201. - WILLIAMS, YOU HAVE GOT A JOB
ON THE HAZELHURST PDCopy !req
202. AS LONG AS YOU WANT IT.Copy !req
203. - OOH, I GET SO HORNY
WATCHING HER EAT.Copy !req
204. EWW.Copy !req
205. - I'D LIKE TO THANK
STEVE WILLIAMSCopy !req
206. FOR HIS ACT OF BRAVERY.Copy !req
207. THIS MAN SAVED MY FAT WIFE,
WHO SEEMS TO BE IN A SUGAR COMACopy !req
208. AFTER WIPING OUT
OUR DOUGHNUTS.Copy !req
209. AND SO IT GIVES ME
GREAT PLEASURECopy !req
210. TO NAME STEVE WILLIAMS
OUR NEW TOP COP.Copy !req
211. - BUT I'M THE TOP COP.
- GIVE ME THE BRACELET, BRIGGS.Copy !req
212. GIVE ME
THE BRACELET, BRIGGS.Copy !req
213. whack!Copy !req
214. - WHAT AN HONOR.Copy !req
215. MY DAD WOULD BE SO PROUD.Copy !req
216. - STEVE, I HAVE TO SAY
THAT WE'RE IMPRESSED.Copy !req
217. - BY YOUR ACCOMPLISHMENT,
NOT BY YOUR BRACELET.Copy !req
218. - YEAH, THAT'S SUPER GAY.Copy !req
219. - WE'RE GONNA MISS YOU
AT THE PARK, MAN.Copy !req
220. - I'D SAY THE SAME,Copy !req
221. BUT TOP COP DOESN'T HAVE TIME
FOR HUMAN EMOTIONS.Copy !req
222. - MULTIPLE SHOTS FIRED
AT SATAN'S BFFs MOTOR CLUB.Copy !req
223. POSSIBLE 187.Copy !req
224. - THIS SOUNDS LIKE A JOB
FOR OUR NEW TOP COP,Copy !req
225. UNLESS YOU'RE SCARED
OF A FEW BIKERS.Copy !req
226. NO.Copy !req
227. OFFICER WILLIAMS
WILL GET THE 411Copy !req
228. ON THAT 187.Copy !req
229. I'M NOT AFRAID TO 69
A COUPLE OF BIKERS.Copy !req
230. POLICE TALK.Copy !req
231. - DON'T DROP
THAT BEAUTIFUL FAT BITCH.Copy !req
232. SHE'S MY SOUL MATE.Copy !req
233. - BEHOLD, THE ALMIGHTY
IN MY TIGHTY-WHITIES.Copy !req
234. - SANTA MARIA!Copy !req
235. - ATTENTION,
WEAK-MINDED SHEEP.Copy !req
236. DON'T FORGET TO BUY
YOUR JEEZ-ASS T-SHIRTSCopy !req
237. AND LUNCH BOXES.Copy !req
238. - THOUSANDS OF PEOPLE,
MOSTLY MEXICANS,Copy !req
239. HAVE MADE THE PILGRIMAGE
TO SEE THIS HOLY HEMORRHOID,Copy !req
240. WHAT SOME,
MOSTLY MEXICANS,Copy !req
241. ARE CALLING
A MODERN-DAY MIRACLE.Copy !req
242. - PEOPLE ARE FLOCKING
TO SEE IT, YOUR EXCELLENCY.Copy !req
243. - BRING HIM TO ME.
WHAT IS THAT?Copy !req
244. - OH, YOU LIKE IT?
CAFE PRESS.Copy !req
245. HERE, I GOT YOU
A MOUSE PADCopy !req
246. AND AN ALTAR BOY
LOVE DOLL.Copy !req
247. EXCUSE ME.Copy !req
248. I GOT A DISTURBANCE CALLCopy !req
249. ABOUT A POSSIBLE MURDER?Copy !req
250. I JUST CAME TO SAY IT'S OKAY.
WE FORGIVE YOU.Copy !req
251. BYE.Copy !req
252. - YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENEDCopy !req
253. TO THE LAST COPS
THAT CAME IN HERE?Copy !req
254. - HOW WOULD YOUR MOTHER FEEL
ABOUT THIS MINDLESS KILLING?Copy !req
255. - WHY DON'T YOU ASK HER?Copy !req
256. - I KNOW WHAT WE SHOULD DO
TO THIS COP.Copy !req
257. JERK HIM OFF.
- WHAT THE, RODNEY?Copy !req
258. WHY WOULD WE DO THAT?
- TO TEACH HIM A LESSON.Copy !req
259. - WHAT LESSON?Copy !req
260. THAT SATAN'S BFFs
GIVE HANDJOBSCopy !req
261. TO EVERY DUDE
THAT COMES IN HERE?Copy !req
262. - SO WE'RE ON THE SAME PAGE?
- SHUT UP, RODNEY!Copy !req
263. WE'RE GONNA GIVE THIS GUY
A DIRT SLIDE RIDE.Copy !req
264. - HEY, THAT SOUNDS FUN.Copy !req
265. THIS ISN'T FUN.Copy !req
266. WAIT, WAIT, STOP, STOP.
IT'S IMPORTANT.Copy !req
267. - WHAT'S SO IMPORTANT?Copy !req
268. - I-I NEED TO RUN TO MY CAR
FOR A SECOND.Copy !req
269. I FORGOT TO SET
THE PARKING BRAKE.Copy !req
270. - YEAH, WE'RE NOT GONNA FALL
FOR THAT.Copy !req
271. - WE'RE GONNA
MURDER YOU, PIG.Copy !req
272. WHERE'D HE GO?Copy !req
273. - I DON'T MEAN
TO BE AN ASSHOLE,Copy !req
274. BUT THIS WOULDN'T HAVE HAPPENED
IF WE'D WENT WITH PLAN J-O.Copy !req
275. - LOOKING GREAT.Copy !req
276. THAT'LL BE 50 BUCKS
AND ALL OF YOUR SELF-RESPECT.Copy !req
277. - I'M NOT WORTHY
TO LOOK UPON YOUR FACE.Copy !req
278. I LOVE YOU, JESUS!Copy !req
279. - YOU MUST BE THE PROPHET,
WOODY JOHNSON.Copy !req
280. - YUP, DOING GOD'S WORK HERE.Copy !req
281. - I'VE BEEN SENT HERE
BY HIS HOLINESS, THE POPE.Copy !req
282. THE PONTIFF WANTS TO VERIFY
YOUR HEMORRHOIDCopy !req
283. AS A TRUE MIRACLE.Copy !req
284. HE REQUESTS
THAT YOU COME WITH MECopy !req
285. TO THE VATICAN AT ONCE.Copy !req
286. - DID YOU HEAR THAT, MALLOY?Copy !req
287. WE'RE GOING TO THE VATICAN
TO MEET THE POPE.Copy !req
288. - I'M NOT SURE
THAT'S A GOOD IDEA.Copy !req
289. HAVEN'T YOU EVER READ
ANY OF THOSE HORRIBLECopy !req
290. DAN BROWN NOVELS?Copy !req
291. - DON'T BE SILLY.
IT'S A GREAT IDEA.Copy !req
292. HEY, CARDINAL,
HOW ARE WE GETTING THERE?Copy !req
293. - TO THE POPE JET.Copy !req
294. THE POPE WILL MEET YOU
FIRST THING IN THE MORNINGCopy !req
295. FOR THE VETTING PROCESS.Copy !req
296. IF EVERYTHING GOES WELL,Copy !req
297. YOUR HEMORRHOID WILL BE VERIFIED
AS A TRUE MIRACLE.Copy !req
298. - AND WHAT HAPPENS
IF IT'S NOT?Copy !req
299. - WELL, ACCORDING
TO BIBLICAL LAW,Copy !req
300. A FALSE WITNESS
WHO BREATHES OUT LIESCopy !req
301. MUST BE PUNISHED.Copy !req
302. - OH, SHIT.Copy !req
303. - I'M NOT WORRIED,Copy !req
304. 'CAUSE THIS 100% REAL,
RIGHT, MALLOY?Copy !req
305. - AS REAL AS EVERY STORY
IN THE BIBLE.Copy !req
306. - AS GUESTS
OF HIS EXCELLENCY,Copy !req
307. I URGE YOU
TO MAKE YOURSELVES AT HOME.Copy !req
308. WHAT ARE YOU DOING?Copy !req
309. - OH, I JUST NOTICED
THAT YOUR CEILINGCopy !req
310. NEEDED SOME RESTORATION.Copy !req
311. HOLY CRAP,
THE ARK OF THE COVENANT.Copy !req
312. WATCH THIS, MALLOY.
HEY, YOU!Copy !req
313. GOT HIM.Copy !req
314. - THEY'LL NEVER FIND ME HERE.
- WHO WON'T FIND YOU?Copy !req
315. QUICK, CALL THE COPS.Copy !req
316. - YOU ARE THE COPS.
- OH, YEAH.Copy !req
317. BRIGGS, SEND BACKUP.Copy !req
318. THESE BIKERS
ARE GONNA KILL ME.Copy !req
319. I WAS HOPING THEY MIGHT.Copy !req
320. YOU'RE ON YOUR OWN,
TOP COP.Copy !req
321. DON'T WORRY, BABY.Copy !req
322. SOON YOU'LL BE BACK
IN MY SWEET, SWEET ASS.Copy !req
323. - YOU BLEW UP OUR CLUBHOUSE.Copy !req
324. - AND NOW
WE'RE GONNA BLOW YOU.Copy !req
325. - GOD DAMN IT, RODNEY!
WE TALKED ABOUT THIS.Copy !req
326. WE'RE GONNA KILL HIM.
- THEN BLOW HIM?Copy !req
327. - NO!Copy !req
328. - THESE ARE SOME WEIRD-ASS
BIKERS.Copy !req
329. - TIME TO DIE, PORKY.Copy !req
330. - WAIT, WHAT IF I REPLACE
YOUR CLUBHOUSE?Copy !req
331. - WITH WHAT?
- HOW ABOUT THIS PLACE?Copy !req
332. IF YOU LET ME LIVE,
YOU CAN HAVE THE RANGER STATION.Copy !req
333. - HMM, NICE FENG SHUI.Copy !req
334. OPEN CONCEPT,
EXPOSED BRICK.Copy !req
335. YOU GOT A DEAL.Copy !req
336. I GUESS THE PIGGY
GETS TO LIVE ANOTHER DAY,Copy !req
337. BUT HE STILL NEEDS
TO LEARN A LESSON.Copy !req
338. WHERE'D HE GO?Copy !req
339. - I'M TEACHING HIM
A LESSON, BOSS.Copy !req
340. - IT'S A GOOD ONE.Copy !req
341. - YEAH!
YEAH, YEAH!Copy !req
342. - WELL, YOU WANTED MORE CRIME
IN THE PARK.Copy !req
343. YOU GOT IT, STEVE.
- SORRY, GUYS.Copy !req
344. THIS IS ALL MY FAULT.Copy !req
345. MAYBE WE SHOULD JUST
FIND A NEW PARK TO WORK AT.Copy !req
346. I HEAR SIX FLAGS
IS HIRING.Copy !req
347. - OH, DON'T BE A PUSSY, STEVE.
WHAT WOULD YOUR DAD SAY?Copy !req
348. - YEAH, STEVE,
THIS PARK IS OUR JURISDICTION.Copy !req
349. WE'RE THE COPS HERE.Copy !req
350. - YEAH, AND IT'S UP TO US
TO BUST THEM.Copy !req
351. - OOH, I'M SO EXCITED
TO MEET THE POPE, MALLOY.Copy !req
352. MALLOY?
- WOODY, MY SON.Copy !req
353. - OH, HEY,
WHAT UP, JESUS?Copy !req
354. - WHEN YOU MEET THE POPE TODAY,Copy !req
355. THERE'S A CHANCE
HE MAY LOCK YOU UPCopy !req
356. AND THROW AWAY THE KEY.Copy !req
357. - WHY WOULD HE DO THAT?
- THAT'S NOT IMPORTANT.Copy !req
358. JUST REMEMBER TO TELL THEM
THAT YOUR BEAR CUBCopy !req
359. HAD NOTHING TO DO
WITH THIS SCHEME.Copy !req
360. - SCHEME?
WHAT SCHEME?Copy !req
361. - OVER AND OUT, MY SON.
- MALLOY!Copy !req
362. YOU TRICKED ME.Copy !req
363. THIS WHOLE THING
IS A LIE?Copy !req
364. HOLY SHIT.Copy !req
365. THE POPE WILL PROBABLY SEND US
TO VATICAN PRISON.Copy !req
366. WE GOT TO GET OUT OF HERE.Copy !req
367. - HIS EXCELLENCY
WILL SEE YOU NOW.Copy !req
368. - WHAT THE HELL
IS RENEE ZELLWEGER DOING HERE?Copy !req
369. - HEY!
THAT'S MY DAD.Copy !req
370. GIVE THAT BACK.Copy !req
371. I SHOULD'VE KNOWN
I COULDN'T BE A COP.Copy !req
372. I'M SORRY
I COULDN'T MAKE YOU PROUD, DAD.Copy !req
373. - YOU MAKE ME PROUD
EVERY DAY, SON.Copy !req
374. DAD?Copy !req
375. - YOU'RE A BRICKLEBERRY RANGER
JUST LIKE I WAS.Copy !req
376. WHAT MORE COULD A FATHER ASK?Copy !req
377. - DIDN'T YOU EVER
GET BORED HERE?Copy !req
378. - IF I DID,
I'D JUST GO BEHIND A BUSHCopy !req
379. AND MASTURBATE.Copy !req
380. - OKAY.Copy !req
381. - SON, BE PROUD OF YOURSELF
AND WHAT YOU ARE,Copy !req
382. A BRICKLEBERRY
PARK RANGER.Copy !req
383. NOW, GET OUT THERE
AND TAKE YOUR PARK BACK,Copy !req
384. AND IF YOU NEED ME,Copy !req
385. I'LL BE JACKING OFF
BEHIND THAT BUSH.Copy !req
386. - YES, SIR.Copy !req
387. I WAS WRONG
FOR NOT APPRECIATING MY JOB.Copy !req
388. SURE, BEING A PARK RANGER
CAN BE BORING AND LAMECopy !req
389. AND PUT YOU AT A HIGH RISK
FOR LYME DISEASE.Copy !req
390. - NOW YOU GOT ME
WANTING TO QUIT.Copy !req
391. - OH, SORRY.
FOG BRAIN.Copy !req
392. YOU KNOW
I HAVE LYME DISEASE.Copy !req
393. NOW, I'VE GOT A PLAN
TO GET THESE A-HOLESCopy !req
394. OUT OF OUR PARK.Copy !req
395. - SORRY, I WAS ZONING OUT.
I HAVE LYME DISEASE.Copy !req
396. - WE KNOW.
WE ALL GOT LYME DISEASE.Copy !req
397. - IT'S A GOOD THING
ETHEL KEPT THAT SIGNCopy !req
398. FROM MIDDLE SCHOOL.Copy !req
399. - I MUST HAVE
A SECRET ADMIRERCopy !req
400. WHO REMEMBERED
MY BIRTHDAY.Copy !req
401. A CUBE OF WOLVES,
MY ONLY FEAR!Copy !req
402. - ARE YOU SURE
THIS WILL WORK?Copy !req
403. - YEAH, YOU'VE BEEN WEARING THEM
FOR TEN STRAIGHT DAYS.Copy !req
404. - FEELS LIKE
MY LUNGS ARE MELTING.Copy !req
405. - GREETINGS, MY SON.
I HAVE HEARD A LOT ABOUT YOU.Copy !req
406. - UH, MR. POPE, SIR,
I GOT SOMETHING TO CONFESS.Copy !req
407. THIS THING,
HEMORRHOID JESUS,Copy !req
408. IT'S NOT REAL.Copy !req
409. I KNOW THAT.
- YOU DO?Copy !req
410. HOW?
- BECAUSE NONE OF IT'S REAL.Copy !req
411. RELIGION'S
ALL A MADE-UP FAIRY TALE.Copy !req
412. - WELL, IF IT'S ALL MADE UP,
WHAT'S THE POINT OF THE CHURCH?Copy !req
413. - MONEY.
IT'S ALWAYS BEEN ABOUT MONEY.Copy !req
414. - AND THE POPE
GETS REALLY ANGRYCopy !req
415. WHEN SOME PUNK BITCH
STEALS WHAT'S HIS.Copy !req
416. - I'D NEVER DO THAT.
- OH, YOU DID DO THAT.Copy !req
417. CATHOLICS,
MOSTLY MEXICANS,Copy !req
418. ARE FLOCKING
TO SEE YOUR HEMORRHOIDCopy !req
419. INSTEAD OF GOING TO CHURCH,Copy !req
420. AND LESS CHURCH ATTENDANCE
IS LESS MONEY.Copy !req
421. AND YOU KNOW WHAT HAPPENS
TO PEOPLECopy !req
422. WHO SCREW
WITH THE POPE'S MONEY?Copy !req
423. - SLAP ON THE WRIST
WITH A FLIMSY RULER?Copy !req
424. - THEY DIE.Copy !req
425. COULD YOU SIGN THIS
FOR MY NIECE?Copy !req
426. SHE'S HALF MEXICAN.Copy !req
427. - I GUESS I'LL TAKE THESE GUYS
DOWN TO THE POLICE STATION.Copy !req
428. - NOT SO FAST, WILLIAMS.Copy !req
429. I'LL BE THE ONE
TAKING THESE LOWLIFES IN.Copy !req
430. TAKING DOWN THE SATAN'S BFFs
WILL IMPRESS THE CHIEF SO MUCHCopy !req
431. HE'LL MAKE ME
TOP COP AGAIN.Copy !req
432. - WE'LL TELL THE CHIEF
YOU HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT.Copy !req
433. - NO, YOU WON'T,Copy !req
434. BECAUSE I'M GONNA PUT A BULLET
IN ALL OF YOU.Copy !req
435. I'LL JUST SAY
THE BIKERS DID IT.Copy !req
436. - SORRY I'M LATE.
I—HEY.Copy !req
437. WHOSE PANTIES ARE THESE?Copy !req
438. UH-OH!Copy !req
439. - ALL RIGHT,
TIME TO WASTE THESE GUYS.Copy !req
440. - FREEZE!
FBI!Copy !req
441. - NO, YOU FREEZE.
DEA.Copy !req
442. - EVERYBODY FREEZE.
ATF.Copy !req
443. - DAMN, IS ANYBODY ELSE HERE
UNDERCOVER?Copy !req
444. - SO WAS ANYBODY HERE
A REAL BIKER?Copy !req
445. - SO FOR THE PAST TEN YEARS,
WE'VE ALL BEEN DOING ANGEL DUSTCopy !req
446. AND MURDERING PEOPLE,
TRYING NOT TO BLOW OUR COVER,Copy !req
447. AND NOBODY HERE
IS A CRIMINAL?Copy !req
448. - TECHNICALLY I GUESS
HE IS.Copy !req
449. HE'S KIND OF A DIRTY COP.Copy !req
450. - STEVE,
BE CAREFUL OUT THERE.Copy !req
451. YOU'RE LUCKY YOU WEREN'T DEALING
WITH REAL BIKERS.Copy !req
452. - YEAH, REAL BIKERS
WOULDN'T HAVE STOPPEDCopy !req
453. AT A HANDJOB
AND A LITTLE SUCKING.Copy !req
454. - GOOD ADVICE.
WHAT ARE YOU GUYS GONNA DO NOW?Copy !req
455. - WELL, I GUESS WE CAN ALL
GO BACK TO OUR NORMAL LIVES.Copy !req
456. ANYONE KNOW
A GOOD METHADONE CLINIC?Copy !req
457. - IS DENZEL OKAY?Copy !req
458. - WHAT HAPPENED?
WHERE AM I?Copy !req
459. OOH, PANTIES.Copy !req
460. UH-OH!Copy !req
461. - OKAY, FIRST YOUR HEMORRHOID,
THEN YOUR THROAT.Copy !req
462. IT'S BEAUTIFUL.Copy !req
463. - HOLY CRAP,
I KILLED THE POPE.Copy !req
464. I GOT TO TWEET THIS.Copy !req
465. - THANKS BE ONTO YOUCopy !req
466. FOR TAKING DOWN
THAT CORRUPT POPE, MY SON.Copy !req
467. - OH, CUT IT OUT, MALLOY.
- IT WASN'T ME.Copy !req
468. - STAND OVER A MIRROR
SO I MIGHT GAZE UPON YOUR FACE.Copy !req
469. WOODY, FOR THIS GREAT WORK
YOU DID,Copy !req
470. YOU'LL BE REWARDED
BY AN ETERNITY IN HELL.Copy !req
471. - HELL?Copy !req
472. WHY WOULD YOU SEND ME
TO HELL, JESUS?Copy !req
473. - I'M NOT JESUS.
I'M SATAN.Copy !req
474. - I WILL VANQUISH
THIS DEVIL.Copy !req
475. - OH, JESUS.Copy !req
476. AH, YEAH.Copy !req