Breaking Bad 2x5

1. Well, we've come a long way, Walt.

2. Here at the end of round one,

3. I'm gonna recommend cautious optimism.

4. We'll check back in two months, see how you've responded,

5. reassess and decide our next move, if any.

6. That's right around the time the baby's due, correct?

7. Uh, yeah.

8. Well, try to think of this as good timing.

9. You'll start feeling better soon, more like yourself.

10. And your hair should start to come back.

11. Ah.

12. Kind of gotten used to the old cue-ball look.

13. I prefer to think of it as streamlined. Right. Aerodynamic.

14. So no more confusion?

15. No more—? No. No. Absolutely none.

16. How are you two holding up?

17. Fine.

18. I mean, you know, we're busy,

19. but we're good. Absolutely.

20. It's all good.

21. So we're not going through an insurer.

22. Is that correct?

23. Yes. Direct bill.

24. Just need to print it out for you.

25. Thank you.

26. Um...

27. I thought we had discussed a cash discount.

28. Absolutely. It's included.

29. Just a reminder.

30. We do have a payment plan available, should you be interested.

31. Oh, yeah.

32. Okay.

33. Congratulations.

34. Thank you.

35. Okay, well, then what about the MRI?

36. Can you—? Can you please explain to me

37. the distinction between diagnostic and exploratory?

38. Yeah, but either way, his doctor ordered it.

39. Okay, you know, it should be covered.

40. You bet I will. Yeah, in triplicate.

41. Okay. Well, I'm sorry you couldn't be of more help too.

42. Yeah. Okay.

43. Bitch.

44. Hi.

45. Been around someone who smokes?

46. No.

47. The hospital bill came.

48. That was fast. Yeah.

49. Three-day stay, 13,000 and counting.

50. Is this something that Gretchen and Elliott might cover?

51. I mean,

52. I know it's strictly your domain, but, um...

53. They will. I'm sure they will.

54. I'll handle it.

55. Oh, God.

56. Bring me up to speed on Tuco Salamanca.

57. Dead. Still?

58. Completely. Okay, then.

59. Well, thanks for stopping by. Okay.

60. So things are quiet, you know. Not a lot of crystal on the streets right now.

61. Good. Of course, that's not gonna last.

62. Wait to see who's gonna rally the roaches now that his turf's up for grabs.

63. No takers so far?

64. Well, we keep hearing a name. Heisenberg.

65. Lately pretty much every dime-bagger we come across.

66. Heisenberg? Yeah, I know.

67. Maybe it's a tweaker urban legend.

68. Still, somebody somewhere is cooking that big blue we keep finding.

69. Anyway, we'll stay on it.

70. Know why sharks are at the top of the food chain, Hank?

71. Because they have three sets of teeth and will take a bite out of anything?

72. Some of those suckers travel thousands of miles

73. in pursuit of their prey.

74. Yeah, I think I heard that.

75. You, my friend, are a great white.

76. How does Albuquerque liaison

77. Tri-State Border interdiction Task Force sound?

78. Like one hell of a promotion.

79. As of the 1st, I want you to split your time between here and El Paso.

80. Thank you, sir. Thank you.

81. Heh, heh. What you gonna do without me, Gomey?

82. Celebrate. I won't have to look at your ugly mug six days a week. Heh-heh-heh.

83. Hey, buddy, I am the brains and the brawn.

84. I'm the whole package. I'm glad I didn't just eat.

85. I'm surprised your head still fits through the door.

86. Hey, you wanna grab lunch? Hell, yeah. Because you're buying.

87. Done. I'll meet you morons downstairs.

88. Try not to get lost on the way.

89. Schrader.

90. Yeah. Hey, Ricky.

91. How you doing? Yeah, I'm stoked too.

92. Yeah, El Paso.

93. Here's the man.

94. Hey, congratulations, Hank. Thanks.

95. Gets two in the sand, two in the forest, you know?

96. And then he says, "Give me a four," you know?

97. Hey. Hey.

98. Hey.

99. You got some nerve coming back here.

100. Or you're even dumber than I thought.

101. Yeah, well, maybe both.

102. Balance for the tow, the repairs,

103. and extra for damages and stuff, the gate,

104. the toilet.

105. Look, like I said,

106. my word is my bond.

107. What would you charge me to store this here?

108. A million-five. Come on, yo.

109. Your sister. Dog, I'm serious, all right?

110. I got storage needs. And I got scratch up front.

111. We could, you know, negotiate.

112. Five hundred.

113. A month? A week.

114. For real?

115. See you. Wait, wait, wait.

116. Just hold on. Just chill.

117. Okay. Sounds good. Totally doable.

118. Outside. Inside.

119. Forget it. Man, come on.

120. Your fence is too easy to climb.

121. Inside, padlocked, plus gate privileges.

122. Come again? Gate, in and out, privileges.

123. Month to month. Cash up front. Inside.

124. And I don't know you. I don't know jack.

125. Yeah.

126. You selling?

127. I'll let you take it for nine Gs.

128. What about that one?

129. Serious?

130. It's Jane, right?

131. Well, Jane, I gotta say, this place is awesome.

132. Really? Does it inspire awe? No. I mean, you know, it's great.

133. Just what I've been looking for. That's what I meant. Uh...

134. I had an entire house before, detached and all.

135. But I was just tired of the lawn care, upkeep and whatnot. You know?

136. Well, the blinds are new. Everything's been painted.

137. Jesus.

138. Utilities are included.

139. Ah, stacking. Sweet.

140. You got cable? Already wired. Just call to activate.

141. High speed, whatever.

142. Bathroom, cool tile.

143. Bedroom.

144. Nice.

145. I'm a fan of the hardwood.

146. So you're interested? Definitely. Definitely, yeah.

147. And you're good with NP, NS?

148. Uh, sorry. What?

149. In the ad? No smoking, no pets.

150. You wanna smoke, you do it outside.

151. Uh, no. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no. Um, it's cool. No worries.

152. All right, the usual drill. I'll need a W-2 or recent pay stub, current employer,

153. former address, you know, the yadda yadda.

154. And if it's all copacetic, I'll call.

155. Yeah. Look, uh,

156. the thing is,

157. I can...

158. Unbelievable.

159. I'm just currently in between situations.

160. Then I'm currently not renting.

161. Look, look, I got the money and I'm totally good for it for, like, ever.

162. Come on, yo, can you please, please just help a brother out?

163. Yo, my dad's not really a make-exceptions kind of guy.

164. Trust me. Your dad?

165. Owns the place. I manage it.

166. Pen on paper. That's what I need.

167. Or go run your game somewhere else.

168. Dude, I got nowhere else to go. This is it.

169. And I got no game, all right?

170. I just need a chance.

171. Look, um, my folks, they kicked me out.

172. I'm a disappointment, apparently.

173. Didn't meet their expectations again.

174. So you know, now I'm persona non gratis or whatever.

175. But you know what? I'm a good person, and I work hard.

176. I will pay you every month and I will pay you on time.

177. I will not mess this up, okay? I swear.

178. Rent just went up.

179. A hundred more a month. That's the cash price.

180. Yes.

181. Okay. Yes.

182. Hey, you rock. Thank you. Thank you. You won't regret this.

183. And in addition to first and last, I want two more months.

184. DBAA fee, nonrefundable.

185. Yeah, of course. No problem. DBAA. Obviously, yeah.

186. All right. So, what's DBAA?

187. Don't be an asshole. Gotcha.

188. I live next door. Really?

189. And don't think for one second you have squatter's rights, because you don't.

190. If you blow this, I want you gone.

191. I know guys that'll have your skinny ass out back by the Dumpster

192. faster than you can blink.

193. Wow.

194. I'll fill it in. Just sign your name.

195. Which is what, by the way?

196. It's Jesse.

197. Uh, Jesse Jackson.

198. Seriously?

199. What?

200. What are you doing? Beating off.

201. What's it look like I'm doing?

202. That is in fact exactly what it looks like to me.

203. Brewing is an art form, Marie. I think you'd appreciate that by now.

204. Christmas, batch of '06? Come on.

205. So let me get this straight.

206. You call in sick the day after receiving a long-awaited,

207. career-boosting promotion,

208. so you can play Oktoberfest in your man cave?

209. I don't get it. Really, I don't.

210. Babe, relax.

211. Please, don't tell me to relax. Sorry, I forgot.

212. You know I hate that. Right.

213. Dave said I should express that.

214. All I'm saying is everything's fine.

215. I can take a day.

216. No big deal.

217. Now get that sweet ass out of here so I can concentrate.

218. Okay, so, what's the plan?

219. The plan is we cook.

220. Why are we cooking when we can't even move what we cook?

221. Well, how much do you think you can sell on your own?

222. Say if I cook during the days, and you work the nights.

223. What? Dude.

224. Prior to Tuco, that was your plan, wasn't it?

225. Now, I understand it'll be a fraction of what we brought in before,

226. but still, what choice do we have? First of all, there's no we.

227. Okay? You're talking me, solo, busting hump slinging shards.

228. I got profile now.

229. Don't you get that? DEA's up my ass.

230. No, I'm not exposing myself to that level of risk for chump change.

231. No way. Then what do you suggest?

232. I don't think either of us are eager to jump into bed with another Tuco.

233. I got bills, man.

234. You've got bills?

235. Rent, yo. Responsibilities.

236. I've already lost more than I've made,

237. and I am tired of dicking around out here.

238. You wanna know how much I've got left?

239. After completing my first round of treatment

240. and financing the world's most expensive alibi? Huh?

241. Zero. Zip. Nothing.

242. I've got nothing to show for all of this. Nothing for my family,

243. which, as you might remember, was the whole damn point.

244. But seeing as throwing in the towel is not an option,

245. that leaves us with a total of two choices:

246. We go into business with yet another homicidal lunatic,

247. or you and I start— We—

248. You selling whatever you can.

249. There's a third way.

250. And what would that be?

251. We got to be Tuco.

252. All right? Cut out the middleman. Run our own game.

253. So you're going to what?

254. Snort meth off a bowie knife?

255. You gonna beat your homeys to death when they "dis" you?

256. Look, I know some guys. All right? I— I can create a network.

257. Look, we control production and distribution.

258. That way, we stay off the front lines while moving some serious glass.

259. I mean, the point here is to make money, right?

260. Sky-high stacks.

261. No. No? That's not the point?

262. No, I am not willing to do that.

263. Who said anything about you?

264. I don't vote for this plan.

265. I'm not comfortable bringing in unknown entities into our operation.

266. Yeah? Well, you don't get to vote.

267. I beg your pardon?

268. This is a partnership, remember? I rem— Oh, I remember.

269. Yeah, you cook, I sell.

270. That was the division of labor when we started all this.

271. And that's exactly how we should have kept it.

272. Because I sure as hell didn't find myself locked in a trunk

273. or on my knees with a gun to my head

274. before your greedy old ass came along. All right?

275. All right, I will admit to a bit of a learning curve.

276. And perhaps I was overly ambitious.

277. In any case, it's not gonna happen that way any more.

278. Yeah, damn straight.

279. Know why?

280. Because we do things my way this time,

281. or I walk.

282. You need me more than I need you, Walt.

283. Yo, enter my casa. Yo, Skinny Pete. What's up, brother?

284. What up with it, yo?

285. Hey, Combo. Good to see you. Welcome to my humble abode.

286. Good deal, mover. Good deal.

287. Yo, Badge, hey. Cool crib, man.

288. Hey, it echoes.

289. Hello.

290. Hello. Hello, hello, hello. Ha, ha, ha.

291. All right. Let me give you the virtual tour, okay?

292. So plasma is gonna go right here.

293. Probably like 50-inch, you know, wall-mounted.

294. Plasma rocks it over LCD, yo.

295. No. They burn in, yo.

296. But the picture's, like, way sharper. Blacks are deeper too.

297. They got 3-D coming out, like, any day now.

298. That's what I'm waiting for.

299. Porn, coz. You know? Jesus.

300. Like 3-D tatas, like right in your face.

301. Yeah. So I'm gonna get a couple of those zero-gravity chairs

302. for, like, right here, for your ultimate viewing comfort.

303. Those are buck.

304. It's gonna be pretty much sparse. Very Asiany, modern stuff.

305. Feng shui, yo. I can dig it. Yeah.

306. I'm thinking, you know, just a bunch of candles,

307. maybe one of those little fountain jobs right here.

308. It's gonna be chill. The ladies,

309. they cream up real nice for, like, candles and shit.

310. You are going to score, big time.

311. All right, so how about we get, you know, down to it?

312. There's some refreshments over here if you wanna partake.

313. You got any other refreshments?

314. I could kick it. It's been a while. Yes, yes.

315. I could totally go for a loving spoonful.

316. No,no, no. No bomb, no beer, no weed. All right?

317. You smoke it up on your own time. We're talking business here.

318. Okay? So listen up.

319. This is how it goes. I front each of you an ounce.

320. All right? You sell it for 2,500. I keep the two, you keep the five.

321. No cutting it. You sell it as is, all right?

322. Twenty-five hundred an ounce?

323. That's kind of, like, hopeful, bro.

324. Yeah, Jesse, street's maybe 17, 18. Seventeen.

325. Okay, A, this is the best shiz ever.

326. All right? Everybody and their mother's gonna want a taste. And second,

327. who else is selling right now, huh?

328. It's dry out there, that's for sure. Church.

329. So you point it how you want, okay? Quarter, half, teener, whatever.

330. But I make what I make. Two large. No exceptions.

331. Short me, you're out.

332. Cut it, you're out.

333. Period.

334. This is a big opportunity I am giving you.

335. Understand?

336. Badger, what is this?

337. Uh...

338. A big opportunity.

339. Exactly. All right? This is the ground floor.

340. Gentlemen, how far you go is up to you.

341. So bring out the product, yo.

342. No, no, no. Not here, all right? Not ever.

343. Blind drop. I will let you know when and where.

344. All right? So you'll be hearing from me.

345. Now, I got mad volume.

346. So you move it quick, you move it right,

347. there is always more.

348. Okay, DBAA, mofos. All right?

349. Apply yourselves.

350. Hell, yeah.

351. Hell, yeah.

352. Hey, there's the big guy.

353. WALT JR.: Congratulations, Uncle Hank.

354. Hey, Hank.

355. It's an armpit.

356. It's not an armpit.

357. Oh, excuse me.

358. You're right. It's the Paris of the Southwest.

359. Please, it's Texas, for God's sake.

360. Right on the border of lawless Mexican hell.

361. Human heads, they leave.

362. The cartels, they litter the place with human heads.

363. Yeah, well, pretty sure that's why I'm going there.

364. It's like a calling card or a shoutout or something.

365. Now, D.C., on the other hand, I could get behind.

366. You just do your time like a good boy,

367. and I could see us in a cute little condo in Georgetown

368. in a couple of years.

369. I went online to this fantastic

370. real estate website for D.C.

371. There's just so much, I don't know, culture there.

372. You know? I was talking to Melinda, Hank's boss's wife.

373. I told you about her, the one with the helmet hair and the permanent lip liner.

374. Anyway, she was saying that when they were there—

375. Shh.

376. Shh, Shh.

377. Apologize.

378. What?

379. I will not listen to one more word until you apologize.

380. For? You know perfectly well, Marie.

381. Well, obviously I don't— Your lies.

382. To me.

383. The shoplifting.

384. All of it.

385. I mean, did you really think it was all just neatly gonna go away?

386. Well, if you hadn't tried to return it—

387. Apologize.

388. Now or never. I mean it.

389. Or it'll never be the same.

390. Why are you punishing me?

391. If you don't respect me enough to apologize, to tell me the truth, then—

392. I need my sister back.

393. I'm sorry.

394. I'm sorry.

395. What do you want, the gory details?

396. Yeah. Oh, yeah.

397. No, you don't.

398. Keep you up at night.

399. So was it scary?

400. Hell, yeah, it was freaking scary, you little punk.

401. Jesus.

402. WALT JR.: But you were way faster than him.

403. Well, I'm here, aren't I?

404. WALT JR.: Yeah. Hell, yeah.

405. Kick ass and take names.

406. Son. No, it's fine.

407. You know what it is?

408. A cockroach comes out from under a fridge, what do you do?

409. I mean, you don't think about it.

410. You stomp them down.

411. Where do they come from?

412. Criminals, like the one you, uh...

413. I mean, what do you think it is that makes them who they are?

414. Buddy, you might as well be asking me about the roaches.

415. All I know is there's a whole world of them out there.

416. Man, I gotta piss like a racehorse.

417. Cops.

418. Cops!

419. Wasn't sure it was you.

420. New car?

421. Yeah, keeping things on the DL.

422. I'm guessing this one doesn't bounce.

423. Your half

424. Fifteen K. That's what I'm talking about.

425. Uh, you're welcome.

426. Jesus.

427. Help me understand the math, okay?

428. I gave you 1 pound, correct?

429. You and I split $2,000 per ounce.

430. $1,000 each.

431. One pound, that's 16 ounces.

432. Sixteen ounces should net to me $16,000.

433. Sixteen. Not 15.

434. Something came up.

435. Something came up?

436. One of my guys got held up by a couple junkies.

437. Lost an ounce. But it's cool, okay? Skinny Pete's cool.

438. Ha, ha.

439. So you're saying that your guy got robbed—

440. Or rather you got robbed. —but it doesn't matter.

441. Dude, it's called breakage, okay?

442. Like Kmart. Shit breaks.

443. And you're thinking this is acceptable?

444. It's the cost of business, yo.

445. You're sweating me over a grand?

446. Hey, look, I'm just the chemist here. I'm not the street guy, yo.

447. But it seems to me that what you call breakage

448. is just you making a fool of yourself.

449. I've got another technical term for you.

450. Non-sustainable business model.

451. You're focusing on the negative.

452. Six grand a day we're making. What's your problem?

453. What happens when word gets out,

454. and it's open season on these clowns you've hired, hm?

455. Once everyone knows that Jesse Pinkman,

456. drug lord, can be robbed with impunity.

457. Man, come on.

458. You think Tuco had breakage?

459. I guess it's true, he did.

460. He broke bones.

461. He broke the skull of anybody who tried to rip him off.

462. You want another grand? Is that it?

463. That's not my point. Take it. Here.

464. Look, you got 15,000 you didn't have yesterday.

465. Hey, we're making bank. Shit happens.

466. My guys get what they're up against and they're careful.

467. So am I.

468. And you're all tucked in at night with your precious family.

469. So why don't you just stop being such a freak about everything?

470. You've made the division of labor very clear.

471. Yo, I mean, seriously,

472. what the hell do you want me to do, huh?

473. Hey. Huh? Oh.

474. Sorry.

475. Wow, you snuck in.

476. Didn't even know you were home.

477. What you eating?

478. A panini. There's another one in the freezer if you want it.

479. I thought we nixed those, huh?

480. Did we?

481. Yeah. I mean, aren't those the ones with the off-the-chart sodium?

482. I had a craving.

483. Once in a while is no big deal.

484. So where's Jr.?

485. Out.

486. With whom?

487. Louis.

488. Out where?

489. Somewhere. I don't know. Huh.

490. He'll be back by 9. Okay.

491. Yeah, I just thought you might have a clue where your son is.

492. Why don't you?

493. Why am I the only one who needs to keep track of our son?

494. I'll tell you what. You wanna know where he is, ask him.

495. Just pick up the phone like I do.

496. Great.

497. Perhaps you might know something

498. about this.

499. Perhaps. Mm-hm.

500. And then again,

501. perhaps I don't, Walt.

502. Perhaps I smoked them in a fugue state.

503. I'd like an explanation, please.

504. You don't wanna go down that road. Why would you do this?

505. You're pregnant, for God's sakes. Three and a half cigarettes

506. is not going to do a thing to the baby.

507. Nothing. Okay, I'm glad you're so sure, doctor.

508. Three and a half. That was it. I tossed the rest.

509. And I'm sure you'll be very glad to hear that, yes, I feel ashamed.

510. Skyler, this— I mean, this is something that—

511. This is so unlike you. Why—? Oh, really?

512. How would you know?

513. No, thank you.

514. Hank.

515. Jesus.

516. Yo.

517. You asked me what I want you to do.

518. I want you to handle it.