1.  I got into
this business because I love stories. 
			  
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2.  They comfort us, they inspire us, 
			  
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3.  they create a context
for how we experience the world. 
			  
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4.  But also, you have to be careful, 
			  
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5.  because if you spend
a lot of time with stories, 
			  
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6.  you start to believe that life
is just stories, and it's not. 
			  
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7.  Life is life, and that's so sad, 
			  
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8.  because there's so little time and... 
			  
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9.  what are we doing with it? 
			  
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10.  - Thank you. 
			  
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11.  When Princess Carolyn told me 
			  
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12.  we were pitching
to whattimeisitrightnow.com, 
			  
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13.  I was excited, 
			  
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14.  because in so many ways,
the story I'm about to tell is about time. 
			  
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15.  And it's about time this story was told. 
			  
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16.  - Ooh!
- Ahh! 
			  
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17.  It's about Detective John Philbert,
a man from another time. 
			  
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18.  But now he finds himself
in a new time. 
			  
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19.  - I'm sorry, did you say newt time?
- No, no, new time. 
			  
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20.  Oh, so it's not like a time full of newts? 
			  
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21.  No. 
			  
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22.  Unless you want it to be
a time full of newts. 
			  
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23.  - No, no, no, no. I'm just clarifying.
- Okay. 
			  
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24.  He finds himself in a time
he doesn't understand. 
			  
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25.  Don't call this number again.
- Wait. I— I just— 
			  
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26.  My mother, she's senile,
and she was drugging the coffee. 
			  
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27.  That's why— Just— 
			  
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28.  I wanted you to know that
none of this was Hollyhock's fault. 
			  
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29.  Goodbye, BoJack. 
			  
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30.  A time in which he is alone. 
			  
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31.  Perhaps, all this time,
he's been alone. 
			  
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32.  - Except for the newts, right?
- Hmm. 
			  
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33.  Yeah. Except for the newts. 
			  
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34.  And then it dawns on him,
his partner isn't a ghost. 
			  
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35.  Or is he? 
			  
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36.  - Wow!
- As we like to say here, 
			  
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37.  there are little hand ideas
and big hand ideas. 
			  
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38.  And that's a big hand idea. 
			  
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39.  And you said BoJack Horseman
is attached? 
			  
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40.  What? Oh, yeah.
BoJack is attached. 
			  
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41.  But he's not like "attached" attached. 
			  
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42.  If you want us
to get somebody better— 
			  
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43.  Oh, no, no, no.
We love BoJack. 
			  
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44.  Yeah. We don't wanna do this
without BoJack, just to be clear. 
			  
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45.  - Well—
- Oh, he's definitely attached. 
			  
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46.  He signed a contract. I saw it myself. 
			  
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47.  Oh, right. Yeah, yeah. 
			  
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48.  So if you look to the left, you'll see
a charming little breakfast nook. 
			  
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49.  - Oh!
Look at that! 
			  
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50.  But if you want more natural light, 
			  
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51.  you could knock down that wall
and put in these... 
			  
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52.  - French doors!
- That is so cool! 
			  
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53.  - You actually don't have to yell.
- Wait, Diane. 
			  
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54.  Are we in the same house right now?
I don't see you. 
			  
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55.  I can hear you.
I think we're close! 
			  
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56.  You can't see each other
in the program. 
			  
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57.  So I'm invisible?
Oh, in this scenario, am I a ghost? 
			  
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58.  Of a Union soldier, perhaps, 
			  
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59.  who cannot rest until
his final letter is delivered! 
			  
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60.  And can I be
Anne of Green Gables? 
			  
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61.  No, you're both still you. 
			  
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62.  Diane, can I talk to you alone
for a moment? 
			  
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63.  - Oh, I can step out—
- Sure! 
			  
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64.  Why don't you meet me
in the guest bathroom? Ow! 
			  
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65.  - You don't have to.
- Where's— 
			  
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66.  - Hold on. I think—
- Guys, I can just— 
			  
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67.  - Here we are.
- Diane? 
			  
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68.  No. Careful. Okay. 
			  
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69.  - Do you really love this house?
- Yeah, it's fine. 
			  
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70.  I didn't love the old house, 
			  
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71.  but it was your house and I moved in,
and it was great. 
			  
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72.  But this is an opportunity
to build something together. 
			  
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73.  Something that'll last
for the rest of our lives. 
			  
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74.  Anything you want is gonna be good
with me. Just like your old house. 
			  
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75.  But I don't want this to just be
another one of my houses. 
			  
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76.  I want this to be our house. 
			  
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77.  And it will be,
because we'll both be living in it. 
			  
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78.  Mr. Peanutbutter,
I don't need anything fancy. 
			  
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79.  All that matters to me
is that I get to live with you. 
			  
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80.  - In the real world.
- Oh! 
			  
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81.  No more campaign,
no more ex-wives. 
			  
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82.  Just Diane and Mr. Peanutbutter,
back to normal. 
			  
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83.  - For the rest of our lives.
- That sounds great. 
			  
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84.  - We'll take it.
- One second, though, 
			  
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85.  - I have to use the bathroom.
- No, no, no, that's not— 
			  
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86.  You completely humiliated me
in front of Sha Na Na! 
			  
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87.  How was I supposed to Sha Na know 
			  
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88.  they were going to invite me
on the stage to do a guitar solo? 
			  
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89.  You're supposed to be my dad. 
			  
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90.  You're supposed to be
looking out for me. 
			  
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91.  You're the worst dad in the world! 
			  
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92.  Well, too bad
I'm the only dad you got. 
			  
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93.  Huh? 
			  
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94.  O.J. Simpson lawyer
and DNA expert Barry Scheck? 
			  
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95.  My car broke down.
What? 
			  
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96.  I guess it ran out of... juice. 
			  
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97.  Hi. Yeah, my mom is a resident. 
			  
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98.  I've still got a bunch of her stuff. 
			  
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99.  Don't put me on hold.
Just take a message— 
			  
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100.  Wait, wait!
You're a DNA expert? 
			  
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101.  Could I use DNA
to find my real family? 
			  
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102.  Well, sometimes,
DNA can be a tricky thing. 
			  
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103.  Like, for example, 
			  
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104.  was Simpson DNA found at the scene
of the murder of Nicole Brown? 
			  
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105.  Sure. Was it O.J. Simpson's DNA? 
			  
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106.  - Who's to say?
- Oh. 
			  
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107.  Maybe it was some other Simpson,
like his son, or his father. 
			  
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108.  There's no way to know.
I wouldn't worry about it. 
			  
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109.  That's too much, man— 
			  
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110.  - Oh.
- Hey, buddy. 
			  
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111.  - Uh-oh.
- She had a long day... of drinking. 
			  
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112.  I figured she shouldn't
drive herself home. 
			  
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113.  - Good thinking.
- Yeah. 
			  
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114.  I was right too,
because she crashed her car. 
			  
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115.  What? 
			  
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116.  I probably should've
said something, but... 
			  
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117.  You need to get your shit together. 
			  
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118.  Wha— Where am I? 
			  
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119.  Okay, so you know how you're always
giving pep talks to people, 
			  
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120.  telling them they need
to get their shit together? 
			  
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121.  Well, this is me giving you
the Princess Carolyn pep talk. 
			  
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122.  - Why am I tied up in the woods?
- So you can't escape my wise words. 
			  
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123.  Is that not part of it?
I couldn't remember. 
			  
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124.  It doesn't matter.
It's all over for me. 
			  
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125.  When it gets out
I faked BoJack's signature, 
			  
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126.  the deal's gonna fall apart. 
			  
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127.  There goes my reputation, my career— 
			  
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128.  Well, there's more to life
than just your career, isn't there? 
			  
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129.  - Is there?
- Isn't there? 
			  
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130.  I have nothing! 
			  
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131.  Oh! This pep talk is going
in the wrong direction. 
			  
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132.  Do you know how hard it is
to start a family at my age? 
			  
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133.  - To find a guy at my age?
- You don't need a guy to start a family. 
			  
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134.  You're Princess Carolyn.
You can do anything. 
			  
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135.  No, I can't. 
			  
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136.  Look, the woods are dark and scary, 
			  
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137.  but the only way out is through. 
			  
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138.  I'm sorry.
I got distracted by the woods. 
			  
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139.  - Um, what were we talking about?
- No, you're right. 
			  
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140.  The only way out is through. 
			  
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141.  I gotta talk to BoJack.
I gotta stop feeling sorry for myself. 
			  
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142.  I'm Princess Carolyn. 
			  
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143.  That's the spirit! 
			  
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144.  As my blood type always says,
"B" positive! 
			  
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145.  - What was that?
- I don't know. 
			  
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146.  - Oh!
- Oh! 
			  
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147.  - Hey, Doctor Picarello. 
			  
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148.  Doctor Picarello, are you okay? 
			  
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149.  - Todd? 
			  
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150.  So it turns out Vice Chancellor
Laughing Gassy got rabies 
			  
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151.  from quarrelling with an old raccoon. 
			  
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152.  And then he started biting everyone,
and now a bunch of them have rabies. 
			  
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153.  Who could have predicted
my innocent clown dentist venture 
			  
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154.  - could turn into something so terrifying?
- I don't see how this concerns me. 
			  
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155.  Yolanda, the only reason
they're in the woods at all 
			  
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156.  is because of you. 
			  
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157.  If people find out the Better
Business Bureau is behind this, 
			  
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158.  you don't think you'll be getting a buzz 
			  
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159.  from the Business Branch
of the Board of Better Bureaus? 
			  
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160.  You're right! We have to do something
before someone gets hurt. 
			  
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161.  Call me four out of five dentists,
because I agree. 
			  
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162.  What? 
			  
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163.  Here we are.
The rest of our lives. 
			  
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164.  Yeah, wow. 
			  
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165.  - Do you wanna go to Hawaii?
- What? Right now? 
			  
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166.  Yeah! When's the last time
we did something impulsive? 
			  
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167.  Well, you did run for governor
without giving it much— 
			  
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168.  I just think we could use a vacation.
Things have been so crazy this last year. 
			  
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169.  Before we start the rest of our lives,
haven't we earned a break? 
			  
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170.  All right. Let's go to Hawaii! They got
that bridge that's just sitting there. 
			  
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171.  - We might as well use it.
- All right! Hawaii, here we come! 
			  
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172.  - All right! Hawaii!
- Hawaii! 
			  
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173.  Oh. 
			  
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174.  So, listen. 
			  
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175.  As you know, one of the differences
between agents and managers— 
			  
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176.  - Oh, my God. Stop. Please stop.
- I'm producing a new TV show. 
			  
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177.  It's a phenomenal script which may
or may not involve ghost or newts. 
			  
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178.  - Does it involve ghost or newts?
- It may! 
			  
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179.  - You haven't read it, have you?
- Read it? I'm producing it! 
			  
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180.  - Right.
- It's this gritty, hard-boiled mystery— 
			  
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181.  - Ugh! I'm so sick of mysteries.
- Right, well— 
			  
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182.  They're impossible to figure out. 
			  
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183.  Then all of a sudden, some random detail
makes the hero remember a conversation 
			  
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184.  that totally re-contextualizes everything,
and then it all magically comes together. 
			  
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185.  - Sure, but—
- It's such bullshit. 
			  
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186.  Where's my random detail that's gonna
suddenly make everything make sense? 
			  
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187.  Because I would love that. 
			  
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188.  Well, this script is really special,
and everyone wants to play the lead, 
			  
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189.  from Matthew McConaughey
to Matthew Perry. 
			  
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190.  - Matthew Perry?
- Yeah. But I was thinking— 
			  
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191.  Hold on. Matthew Perry... 
			  
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192.  Hey, BoJack, which one
of these pictures more says, 
			  
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193.  "This daughter looks like a cool lady
that I wanna have in my life"? 
			  
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194.  Why do you ask? 
			  
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195.  I'm writing a letter to my mom
and I want to include a picture. 
			  
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196.  I'm going to send it
to the adoption agency. 
			  
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197.  Maybe if they still have her address
on file, they can forward it to her. 
			  
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198.  Seems like a long shot. How about
a better strategy is, don't do that, 
			  
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199.  and then you won't be disappointed
when it doesn't work out? 
			  
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200.  I'm trying everything.
I don't wanna look back at this 
			  
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201.  and feel like the end
of "Chandler's List," you know? 
			  
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202.  - You mean Schindler's List.
- Never saw it. 
			  
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203.  I'm talking about "Chandler's List," 
			  
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204.  the sketch from when Matthew Perry
hosted SNL. 
			  
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205.  - Remind me?
- Okay. 
			  
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206.  So it's Chandler from Friends, 
			  
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207.  and it's World War II,
and he's got this list. 
			  
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208.  And the whole time, he's like,
"I'm Chandler! 
			  
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209.  Could I have a bigger list?" 
			  
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210.  But then at the end, the war's over,
and he's like... 
			  
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211.  - "Could I have had a bigger list?"
- Whoa. 
			  
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212.  He's haunted because he feels
like he could have done more. 
			  
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213.  You know, he's like, 
			  
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214.  "Could I be any more feeling
like I could have done more?" 
			  
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215.  I have to go. 
			  
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216.  Look, I'm trying to do you a favor here! 
			  
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217.  Oh. 
			  
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218.  Huh. 
			  
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219.  Huh? 
			  
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220.  Shh! 
			  
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221.  Yes. Get the magazine. 
			  
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222.  What a fine addition
to your waiting room. 
			  
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223.  - Oh, no! 
			  
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224.  - Oh, God. 
			  
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225.  What are we gonna do, Todd? 
			  
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226.  - Guys, let's talk this out. 
			  
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227.  Run. Ouchie! Ouchie! 
			  
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228.  - Oh, man.
- I've never run that fast in my life. 
			  
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229.  - Me neither.
- I gotta get in better shape. 
			  
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230.  I keep saying I'm gonna run more,
but it's just so hard to stay motivated. 
			  
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231.  Hmm. 
			  
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232.  Don't "hmm." I'm talking to you. 
			  
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233.  - Can you not start and stop so much?
- I can't control the traffic, darling. 
			  
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234.  When the car in front of me starts,
I start. And when it stops, I stop. 
			  
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235.  Maybe you don't have to start
every time the car in front of you starts, 
			  
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236.  because you know it's gonna
stop again anyway. 
			  
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237.  - You could leave a little space.
- Okay. 
			  
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238.  - And another car just cut in front of me 
			  
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239.  because I left a little space. 
			  
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240.  Well, I'm sorry, but I'm getting carsick. 
			  
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241.  Okay. I'm gonna get some gas. 
			  
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242.  All right. I got the lowdown. 
			  
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243.  First of all, very important,
I got you this flattened penny. 
			  
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244.  I will cherish it always. 
			  
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245.  - I'm sorry for being annoying before.
- Don't worry about it. 
			  
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246.  Here's the deal. 
			  
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247.  With this traffic,
we can stay on our current trajectory 
			  
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248.  and get to Hawaii just in time
to spend two luxurious hours 
			  
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249.  at the Honolulu Stilton,
and then turn around and come back, 
			  
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250.  or we can hang out here
at the Thrifty Lodge 
			  
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251.  at this charming halfway to Hawaii
rest area and gas park. 
			  
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252.  Excuse me,
we would like your finest room, please. 
			  
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253.  - All our rooms are the same.
- What kind of cuisine is on premises? 
			  
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254.  There's a deli at the gas station
across the street. 
			  
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255.  - And what are your spa hours?
- There's no spa. 
			  
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256.  Okay, if I wanted to have a big gala,
could I use your grand ballroom for that, 
			  
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257.  or is that booked months in advance? 
			  
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258.  I could settle for a demi-ballroom
in a pinch, 
			  
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259.  but attire will be formal,
I don't wanna upstage the venue. 
			  
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260.  We have zero ballrooms
in this Thrifty Lodge. 
			  
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261.  I see. This will do nicely. 
			  
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262.  Didn't you tell me once
you always wanted a ballroom? 
			  
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263.  Actually, no.
What I wanted was a Belle-room. 
			  
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264.  What is that? Like a room full of bells? 
			  
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265.  It's a room full of big books,
with big windows and a ladder, 
			  
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266.  like Belle got in Beauty and the Beast. 
			  
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267.  - And it's called a Belle-room?
- It's called a library. 
			  
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268.  But I called it a Belle-room
because it was magical. 
			  
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269.  And since it was a name I made up
for a room that wasn't real, 
			  
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270.  that meant that it was just mine. 
			  
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271.  That's adora-Belle. 
			  
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272.  Hey, Seaborn! Seaborn!
- What's that? 
			  
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273.  You're Seaborn's Seahorse Milk, right? 
			  
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274.  Ha! That's right. 
			  
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275.  Oh, man! Can I get a shellfie? 
			  
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276.  That's like a shellfish version
of a selfie. 
			  
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277.  - Hmm?
- Go, take a picture. 
			  
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278.  It'll make their day. 
			  
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279.  - You sure? You don't mind?
- I'll be in the room. 
			  
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280.  Don't stay out
with your new friends too late. 
			  
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281.  Hey, guys. I'm coming down.
What other of my things do you like? 
			  
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282.  Wow, yeah! 
			  
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283.  Okay, so... 
			  
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284.  Oh. 
			  
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285.  Hey. 
			  
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286.  So the supplier said,
"I really oughta give Iowa a try." 
			  
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287.  But I said, "Buddy, Kansas City's
about as far as I can go." 
			  
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288.  Long story short,
we're meeting in St. Louis. 
			  
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289.  - Huh? 
			  
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290.  - Hey!
- I need to talk to Hollyhock! 
			  
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291.  - She's not here.
- You have to let me see her. 
			  
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292.  Please, I flew all the way here
and it's Wichita, 
			  
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293.  so it's not like
I got other shit to do in Wichita. 
			  
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294.  No one told you to come here. 
			  
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295.  You're the one
who likes foreign movies, right? 
			  
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296.  That part in Amelie,
where she listens to the guy's story? 
			  
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297.  This is that part.
And I'm the guy with the story. 
			  
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298.  And I need you to be Amelie right now. 
			  
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299.  I don't like foreign movies.
I like foreign films. 
			  
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300.  Okay, you're impossible. 
			  
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301.  The rest of you, please,
just listen for a second. 
			  
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302.  I know you hate me.
But for Hollyhock, please, listen. 
			  
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303.  Whole time she's staying with me,
it doesn't make sense, right? 
			  
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304.  If I'm her father,
where is her mother? 
			  
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305.  Well, that's an extremely
heteronormative way 
			  
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306.  - of looking at things.
- No, I'm saying, medically, 
			  
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307.  where is the woman I had sex with
that made her be born? 
			  
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308.  Right? That's why Hollyhock
came to L.A. in the first place. 
			  
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309.  Okay... 
			  
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310.  But then I thought,
"What if I'm not her father?" 
			  
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311.  You're not her father.
We are her fathers. 
			  
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312.  You're her fathers. Yeah. I know, I know. 
			  
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313.  Eight of you, each have
your own cute thing, I get it. 
			  
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314.  My point is, Hollyhock and I
have the same DNA, 
			  
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315.  but that doesn't mean I'm her father. 
			  
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316.  You're not.
Because being a father isn't just— 
			  
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317.  God, I feel like you are
willfully misunderstanding me. 
			  
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318.  What I am saying is,
I'm not even her father biologically. 
			  
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319.  - Excuse me?
- My father is her father. 
			  
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320.  - What?
- Huh? 
			  
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321.  I went to every hospital
and clerk house in L.A. 
			  
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322.  I waited in lines, filled out forms,
talked to anyone who would talk to me. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
323.  I wouldn't rest until I knew
I'd done everything I could. 
			  
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324.  But there was no record
of a little horse girl 
			  
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325.  born on Hollyhock's birthday... 
			  
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326.  Okay, so? 
			  
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327.  in L.A., because Hollyhock
wasn't born in L.A. 
			  
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328.  She was born in San Francisco. 
			  
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329.  I got a little bug in my brain
that my father knocked up the help. 
			  
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330.  So I went up there, and I did
the whole thing again, and I found it. 
			  
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331.  The birth certificate
with her mother's name, 
			  
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332.  clear as day, Henrietta Platchkey. 
			  
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333.  - That's—
- But where is she now, right? 
			  
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334.  Looked her up on Facebook.
I know what you think: 
			  
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335.  "BoJack Horseman
has a Facebook account?" 
			  
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336.  Obviously, I didn't,
because the Internet is for nerds. 
			  
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337.  But I know it's a good way to find people,
so I set up an account, and I found her. 
			  
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338.  She lives in Minneapolis.
She's a nurse. 
			  
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339.  Her phone number
was on her Facebook page. 
			  
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340.  And I wanted Hollyhock to have it. 
			  
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341.  - You did all that?
- She has to know. 
			  
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342.  You don't have to tell her I was here.
I'll stay out of her life forever. 
			  
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343.  You can tell her I'm an asshole.
Say you found this on your own. 
			  
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344.  I don't care, but you have
to tell her. Please. 
			  
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345.  Whittagut dittagoo yittagoo
gittaguys thittagink? 
			  
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346.  Hittagollittagy-hittagock's
stittagill frittagail. 
			  
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347.  - Guys—
- Littaget's jittagust 
			  
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348.  tittagell hittagim whittagut hittagee
wittagants tittagoo hittageer. 
			  
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349.  - All right, BoJack. We'll tell her.
- Yeah? 
			  
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350.  Yeah. But you need to leave.
Right now. 
			  
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351.  Okay. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
352.  Welcome to the best
workout routine in L.A. 
			  
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353.  Nothing motivates like fear. 
			  
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354.  So remember, once you're in there,
don't stop running. 
			  
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355.  If the clown dentists catch you,
they will bite you, 
			  
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356.  and they have very healthy teeth. 
			  
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357.  Okay, but not really, right? 
			  
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358.  Nope, really. They will actually bite you,
and they do actually have rabies. 
			  
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359.  Wow, guess I'm gonna
really have to run. 
			  
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360.  No more excuses. This is great. 
			  
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361.  Exactly! And don't forget...
have fun in there! 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
362.  Whoo-hoo!
Let's do this. 
			  
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363.  Well, you did it.
You made a better business. 
			  
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364.  We did it. 
			  
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365.  Between your no-nonsense approach 
			  
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366.  and my the-regular-amount-of-nonsense
approach, 
			  
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367.  we make a pretty good team. 
			  
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368.  Yes. I'm going back to my job. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
369.  But if anything happens here
and you need me, 
			  
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370.  or if you just wanna hang out again, 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
371.  grab a drink,
you should call me sometime. 
			  
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372.  Oh, um, I should tell you,
I'm actually asexual. 
			  
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373.  Yeah, I know. So am I.
That's why I'm asking you out. 
			  
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374.  - Oh! Uh, okay.
- Okay. Goodbye. 
			  
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375.  Huh. 
			  
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376.  - I have to talk to you.
- Make yourself at home. 
			  
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377.  I screwed up. I'm sorry. 
			  
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378.  I promised you'd do this show. 
			  
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379.  I don't know why. I just...
I needed something— 
			  
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380.  - I'll do it.
- What? 
			  
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381.  You want me to do it, I'll do it.
God knows you've done enough for me. 
			  
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382.  - What's wrong? I said I'd do it. 
			  
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383.  It's just really hard to need people. 
			  
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384.  Yeah, but... 
			  
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385.  Yeah. Thank you. 
			  
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386.  Eh, it'll be good for me
to get out of the house anyway. 
			  
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387.  You want a drink? 
			  
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388.  - Water.
- Water? "Water" you pregnant? 
			  
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389.  Very much not so. 
			  
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390.  - I heard you got a new boyfriend.
- We broke up. 
			  
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391.  Oh. Sounds like an asshole. 
			  
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392.  He was actually the first guy I ever dated
who wasn't an asshole. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
393.  - Well, onwards and upwards.
- I heard you had a kid living with you? 
			  
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394.  No. She's got these adopted dads. 
			  
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395.  They're total dicks,
but they take care of her. 
			  
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396.  - She'll have a good life.
- Oh. 
			  
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397.  - You ever think of adopting? 
			  
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398.  - More and more lately.
- You should. You'd be a good mom. 
			  
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399.  - The world needs good moms.
- I'll take that under advisement. 
			  
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400.  Well, I guess I'll see you on set. 
			  
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401.  I'm looking forward to it. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
402.  Now, back to normal.
Diane and Mr. Peanutbutter. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
403.  - Here we are. The rest of our lives.
- I wanna show you something. 
			  
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404.  I had the contractor put this together
while we were gone. Close your eyes. 
			  
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405.  Okay...
- All right. Open them. 
			  
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406.  - Oh, my God! It's—
- Pretty cool, huh? 
			  
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407.  - Why would you do this?
- It's what you always wanted, right? 
			  
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408.  It's too much. I didn't want it like this. 
			  
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409.  - Like what?
- I don't know. I'm sorry. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
410.  This is great. I'm sorry. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
411.  Why would you think I would like this? 
			  
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412.  Because you told me
this is what you always dreamed of? 
			  
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413.  I don't like big gestures like this! 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
414.  - How many times have I—?
- Yeah, but this is— 
			  
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415.  This was a fantasy,
something that belonged to me. 
			  
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416.  Why couldn't you have asked me— 
			  
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417.  I'm sorry. I'm sorry I ever try
to surprise you, or do nice things. 
			  
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418.  Do you know how much it cost
to get 5,000 fake books? 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
419.  - So I'm the bitch? Is that what you—
- I'm sorry that I wanted to make our home 
			  
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420.  feel like a place
that you would want to live 
			  
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421.  that could be yours as well as mine! 
			  
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422.  Why is that so important to you? 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
423.  Because otherwise,
it feels like you're a guest. 
			  
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424.  And unlike the talking candlestick
in the aforementioned Disney film, 
			  
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425.  I don't want you to be that. 
			  
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426.  It makes me feel shitty. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
427.  Like you're just visiting here, 
			  
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428.  until the next thing
and you're gonna leave me 
			  
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429.  when you get bored
or you find something better. 
			  
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430.  Like Katrina did. Like Jessica did. 
			  
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431.  You can't use your ex-wives against me. 
			  
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432.  I'm just telling you how I feel. 
			  
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433.  I was trying to do a nice thing for you. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
434.  This is not how I thought
this would go at all. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
435.  Diane and Mr. Peanutbutter.
Back to normal, right? 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
436.  You know, sometimes I feel like
our marriage is like a magic eye poster. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
437.  - I love those things.
- I know. 
			  
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438.  And it's messy. And at first glance,
it doesn't seem to make any sense. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
439.  And it's hard to figure out. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
440.  But sometimes, 
			  
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441.  if you squint at it just right,
everything lines up, 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
442.  and it's the most perfect...
beautiful, amazing thing. 
			  
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443.  Yeah. I know what you mean. 
			  
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444.  But... 
			  
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445.  I'm so tired of squinting. 
			  
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446.  Oh... 
			  
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447.  What? 
			  
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448.  - Oh, Christ. 
			  
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449.  - Hollyhock.
- Hi. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
450.  - How are you?
- Listen... 
			  
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451.  I wanted to thank you
for finding my mom. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
452.  - They told you?
- Not exactly. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
453.  They have this secret dad language
they think I don't understand, 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
454.  but it's super obvious
what they're saying. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
455.  You're too smart
for your own good. 
			  
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456.  So, yeah, I've been talking
to Henrietta on the phone 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
457.  and she seems really nice. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
458.  Really? Wow! 
			  
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459.  I'm gonna visit her in Minneapolis.
I'm at the airport right now. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
460.  Right now? That's incredible. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
461.  No, what's incredible
is this place at the airport 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
462.  charged me ten dollars
for a cup of fruit. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
463.  - What?
- And get this. 
			  
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464.  It's like 90 percent honeydew. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
465.  Are you kidding me? Why? 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
466.  What on-the-go jet-setter's demanding
more honeydew in his or her fruit cup? 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
467.  Nobody ever wants honeydew,
it's always there. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
468.  It is literally the worst part
of everything it's in. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
469.  It's like the Jared Leto of fruits. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
470.  Thank you. Exactly. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
471.  Mmm. 
			  
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472.  Well... 
			  
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473.  Anyway,
they're about to start boarding, so... 
			  
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474.  Hollyhock, I'm sorry
I didn't take better care of you. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
475.  I shouldn't have moved in with you.
It was maybe too much too fast. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
476.  - Yeah.
- But it wasn't all bad. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
477.  I mean, yeah,
I got secretly drugged for months on end 
			  
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478.  to the point I was living a nightmare
in which I couldn't recognize my own body 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
479.  or understand what was happening
to my brain, but, 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
480.  other than that,
it was a pretty chill experience. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
481.  I should have protected you. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
482.  I really wanted to be
a good dad to you, Hollyhock. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
483.  Well, turns out you're not my dad at all. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
484.  Yeah. Good thing, I guess. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
485.  Yeah. Good thing. 
			  
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486.  So, uh, Minneapolis, huh?
Did you rent a car or a cab? 
			  
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487.  BoJack, it's all taken care of.
I gotta go. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
488.  Is there anything, uh, I can do? 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
489.  I can upgrade your seats, or...
or send you better fruit. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
490.  BoJack, look,
I never needed you to be a dad. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
491.  I'm going to be fine. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
492.  I told you from the beginning,
I have eight dads. 
			  
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493.  Yeah. Yeah. Good. 
			  
			Copy !req 
			
		
	
		
			
494.  But... I've never had a brother. 
			  
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