1. Sir, you can't send me to Vietnam.Copy !req
2. I can do whatever I want.Copy !req
3. I'm president of the goddamn
United States of America.Copy !req
4. Isn't that right, Checkers?Copy !req
5. That's what it says
on your business cards.Copy !req
6. There are going to be riots
in the streets.Copy !req
7. I'm Secretariat.Copy !req
8. You think I'm afraid
of a few rioting hippies?Copy !req
9. Don't make me laugh. Ha-hoo.Copy !req
10. Or whatever a laugh sounds like.Copy !req
11. Please, I'll do anything.Copy !req
12. You gotta send someone else
in my place.Copy !req
13. Hmm. Perhaps an arrangement can be...
arranged.Copy !req
14. I'm just an athlete. I'm no hero.
My brother Jeffretariat is the hero.Copy !req
15. He's fighting the Reds over in 'Nam,Copy !req
16. which is necessary
to protect our way of life.Copy !req
17. And another hero is President Nixon.Copy !req
18. He is one groovy dude.Copy !req
19. Groovy.Copy !req
20. What the hell are you doing?Copy !req
21. Sorry, Mommy!Copy !req
22. Don't you dare put that out.Copy !req
23. That is a perfectly good cigarette,
and you are going to finish it.Copy !req
24. But I don't wanna.Copy !req
25. And I don't want to be
the mother of a quitter.Copy !req
26. Finish it.Copy !req
27. Jesus Christ, you can't even smoke
a cigarette right.Copy !req
28. Don't you dare cry,
don't you ever cry.Copy !req
29. You wanted this.Copy !req
30. Are you punishing me for smoking
or for stealing?Copy !req
31. I'm punishing you for being alive.Copy !req
32. Ugh.Copy !req
33. Uh, BoJack? You really shouldn't throw
a lit cigarette off the...Copy !req
34. Fine. I'll call 911.Copy !req
35. The fire department got
everything under control,Copy !req
36. but the cable's out
for the neighborhood.Copy !req
37. I don't understand
what started the fire.Copy !req
38. Nobody knows where fires come from,
it's a mystery.Copy !req
39. Anyway, I am fired up
about my first day back on set.Copy !req
40. We're gonna finish
that big Nixon scene.Copy !req
41. We were just one shot away
before we went on hiatus.Copy !req
42. Yeah, I know.
You told me at breakfast.Copy !req
43. Why did you call me?Copy !req
44. Usually I talk to Diane
on the way to work,Copy !req
45. but she abandoned me to teach piano
in Cordovia or something.Copy !req
46. Oh. Well, glad you settled for me
because Diane wasn't available.Copy !req
47. You bet. Oh, man, I'm gonna kill
in this Nixon scene.Copy !req
48. BoJack gonna be in "da" house.Copy !req
49. In da White House.Copy !req
50. What happened to da house set?
Da White House set?Copy !req
51. - Things changed a little.
- You cut the Nixon scene?Copy !req
52. The Nixon scene is the core
of the whole movie.Copy !req
53. Where we see Secretariat
be morally corruptedCopy !req
54. and get to look
into the real darkness of his soul.Copy !req
55. It's still all that,
except now it happensCopy !req
56. while you give a Christmas present
to your niecesCopy !req
57. and they hug you
while your butt is stuck in a chimney.Copy !req
58. Is one of the nieces Nixon?Copy !req
59. Over hiatus, we ran a focus group.Copy !req
60. People don't want
all that controversial stuff.Copy !req
61. But we were supposed to make
a gritty movie about the real Secretariat.Copy !req
62. - Warts and all.
- Kid, "warts and all" don't pay bubkes.Copy !req
63. That's why they took the gay stuff
out of A Beautiful Mind.Copy !req
64. Know that guy who spent 12 years
as a slave?Copy !req
65. They don't talk about the 60 years
he spent as a jerk.Copy !req
66. - Kelsey, you're okay with this?
- Eh...Copy !req
67. That's showbiz.Copy !req
68. See, BoJack,
that's the shrug of a pro who gets it.Copy !req
69. Good shrugging, kid.Copy !req
70. Yo! Care-to-the-O-to-the-Lyn-to-the...Copy !req
71. That's the end of your name.
We need to talk.Copy !req
72. We'll meet in the supply closet
in one minute. Break!Copy !req
73. Oh, okay.Copy !req
74. Ooh, ow.Copy !req
75. Carolyn, when you're in the throes
of a very ugly divorce such as I am,Copy !req
76. along with all that pain and degradation
comes a certain perfect clarity,Copy !req
77. and right now that clarity is telling me
that you and I should get out of here.Copy !req
78. Well, what do you mean,
"get out of here"?Copy !req
79. Beautiful, I'm starting my own agency,
and I want you to be my partner in crime.Copy !req
80. What? But I can't just leave Vigor.Copy !req
81. I've been here 20 years.Copy !req
82. Who's gonna water the plants?Copy !req
83. Um, I'm sorry. You water the plants?Copy !req
84. I started doing it as an intern,Copy !req
85. but then no one told me to stop,
so it's still kind of my job.Copy !req
86. Carolyn,
you are my gritty, witty city kitty.Copy !req
87. I want you with me, fifty-fifty.Copy !req
88. Things are so crazy
for me right now. I...Copy !req
89. Don't give me that, you want crazy.
"Crazy" is your favorite Patsy Cline songCopy !req
90. and your second favorite
Gnarls Barkley song.Copy !req
91. I don't want crazy.Copy !req
92. I've got five episodes
of The Good Wife piled up on my DVR,Copy !req
93. and I just want a night off
to enjoy them.Copy !req
94. Well, if that's how you feel, I guess
I could just go to Vanessa Gekko.Copy !req
95. - Gekko?
- But I'd rather look at you all day.Copy !req
96. You're an amazing agent.
And you're bright, and you're fun.Copy !req
97. And I think we could make something
really special.Copy !req
98. We weren't doing anything!
We were just looking for closet supplies.Copy !req
99. Are you the person to talk to
about unclogging the toilet?Copy !req
100. Stuart, I'm your boss.Copy !req
101. Okay, but you're the one
in the janitor's closet, so...Copy !req
102. What, I'm the idiot?Copy !req
103. The first thing you notice
about Sebastian St. ClairCopy !req
104. is that he speaks in paragraphs.Copy !req
105. Even I can't believe
how much good we've done here,Copy !req
106. and I'll believe almost anything.Copy !req
107. In the last six weeks,
we dug a new well, built a school,Copy !req
108. and next month
the community center is doing Seussical.Copy !req
109. There we go.Copy !req
110. In his previous life,
Sebastian ownedCopy !req
111. a chain of high-end department stores.Copy !req
112. I want to stock up on muffs.Copy !req
113. We're going to sell a lot of muffs
this winter. Huzzah!Copy !req
114. Diane, I lived a life
of power and luxury,Copy !req
115. and then my picture
was in the newspaper.Copy !req
116. - A real-life newspaper!
- Uh-huh.Copy !req
117. But I knew my life was empty.Copy !req
118. At night I heard the cries
of children sick and dying.Copy !req
119. And I would scream into the night.Copy !req
120. Shut up! Shut up, children!Copy !req
121. But the phantom cries would not abate.Copy !req
122. And so I began my travels,Copy !req
123. with little more than a compass,
a yearning for adventure,Copy !req
124. and several crates full of unsold muffs.Copy !req
125. I knew there were people out there
just waiting for my help.Copy !req
126. Diane, this is Kinko.Copy !req
127. I am Kinko.Copy !req
128. In his language, it means,Copy !req
129. orphan whose parents were murdered
by rebels and will die young,Copy !req
130. probably from malaria.Copy !req
131. Hi, Kinko. I'm Diane.Copy !req
132. It means,
my parents liked the show Cheers.Copy !req
133. Cheers! Oh, you're good.
You're very good.Copy !req
134. When Sebastian St. Clair says
you're good,Copy !req
135. you want to believe
that you really are.Copy !req
136. That you, like Sebastian, are part
of something bigger than just yourself.Copy !req
137. And for a moment,
you feel like you are.Copy !req
138. Oh, Kinko made a mess.Copy !req
139. Now I finally realize that a triple hug is
way more valuable than a Triple Crown.Copy !req
140. And cut. Neat.Copy !req
141. - Let's break for lunch.
- Oh!Copy !req
142. Kelsey, this is a nightmare.Copy !req
143. I had to touch three children today,
and one of them was sticky.Copy !req
144. Yeah, it was you.
Wash your damn hands, you gremlin.Copy !req
145. - BoJack, there's nothing we can do.
- No, this isn't you.Copy !req
146. I've seen everything you've done.Copy !req
147. Your films are challenging and gritty,
and they're great.Copy !req
148. I'm not just saying that
because they're full of lesbians.Copy !req
149. Look, even if I wanted to finish
that Nixon scene,Copy !req
150. we don't have an Oval Office set.Copy !req
151. There's one at the Nixon Library
in Yorba Linda.Copy !req
152. Why on earth do you know that?Copy !req
153. In season three of Horsin' Around,
the horse got elected presidentCopy !req
154. and we shot on location.Copy !req
155. We can sneak into the library
and get the shot, guerilla-style.Copy !req
156. Once Turteltaub sees it,
he'll love it,Copy !req
157. and we can make the movie
we both want to make.Copy !req
158. - Okay, I'm in. Let's do it.
- All right!Copy !req
159. Did they really make
your character president?Copy !req
160. Only for season three.Copy !req
161. In season four, it turned out
it was all a dream.Copy !req
162. They called my airplane Air Horse One.Copy !req
163. And the vice president was
a hip-hop zebra named Zebro.Copy !req
164. - Come on.
- It wasn't our best season.Copy !req
165. But on the bright side,
was not our worst.Copy !req
166. Step one, we go to the Nixon Library...Copy !req
167. and steal the scale model.Copy !req
168. Welcome to my library.Copy !req
169. I'm Nixon..Copy !req
170. Yeah, you know,
some people say I look like Nixon.Copy !req
171. Not because he's my dad or anything.
That's crazy. Nixon's not my dad.Copy !req
172. But if you have any questions about Nixon,
I'd be happy to answer them.Copy !req
173. Yeah, I have a question. Um...Copy !req
174. Is that the lighted exit sign
from Nixon's boyhood home?Copy !req
175. Uh, no, that's just an exit sign.Copy !req
176. - Is that...
- Here we go.Copy !req
177. The handicapped drinking fountain
he used in the White House?Copy !req
178. No, just a normal drinking fountain.Copy !req
179. - Hang on.
- One more.Copy !req
180. - Is that the smoke alarm...?
- No.Copy !req
181. So the Oval Office is right here,
next to the men's room.Copy !req
182. I remember because season three
of Horsin' Around was a big cocaine year.Copy !req
183. All the pressures of being president.Copy !req
184. - I don't see how we'll pull this off.
- We're gonna need a crack team.Copy !req
185. First, we gotta get
the best lock-pick in the city.Copy !req
186. - Not interested.
- Okay.Copy !req
187. The second best lock-pick in the city.Copy !req
188. - No way I'm doing that.
- Got it.Copy !req
189. A lock-pick.Copy !req
190. Todd, can you pick locks?Copy !req
191. - Kind of.
- Great. You're in.Copy !req
192. We'll need an expert cat burglar.Copy !req
193. All right, Good Wife,
let's see what you got.Copy !req
194. Hey, Princess Carolyn!Copy !req
195. Kelsey and I are gonna break
into the Nixon libraryCopy !req
196. to steal a shot
for our Secretariat movie.Copy !req
197. It's a super-sneaky, kooky caper
that stands to benefit you in no way.Copy !req
198. Are you in?Copy !req
199. Hey! Shut up down there!Copy !req
200. - You shut up!
- Make me!Copy !req
201. Hey, you got a problem?
Take it up with my agent,Copy !req
202. your downstairs neighbor
Princess Carolyn.Copy !req
203. We'll need someone to play Checkers.Copy !req
204. Hey, Chicago! Al Capone, deep dish.Copy !req
205. What does Ethan Hawke know?
We'll find out tonight. Da Bears.Copy !req
206. BoJack, I'd love to help you out,Copy !req
207. but I'm super-busy recording promosCopy !req
208. for television's
highest-rated new game show.Copy !req
209. - We can probably do it without you.
- This next one's for Seattle.Copy !req
210. Hey, Seattle! Space Needle, Starbucks.Copy !req
211. What does Ethan Hawke know?
We'll find out tonight. Rain.Copy !req
212. It's too bad though because I could
really bring a lot to this project.Copy !req
213. The more I think about it,
Checkers wouldn't even be in the shot.Copy !req
214. It's just a single on Secretariat.Copy !req
215. Hey, Waco, Texas! Terrible tragedy.
What does Ethan Hawke know?Copy !req
216. - We'll find out tonight. So sorry.
- You know what? Forget I even asked.Copy !req
217. - Twist my arm, why don't you? I'll do it.
- Okay.Copy !req
218. Finally, we'll need a criminal mastermind.Copy !req
219. Character actress Margo Martindale,
you've been a model prisoner.Copy !req
220. I'm glad I served my time.Copy !req
221. But now I'm ready to move on with my lifeCopy !req
222. and get back to doing small rolesCopy !req
223. in critically-acclaimed films
and television shows.Copy !req
224. Watch, purse, lipstick,Copy !req
225. Emmy Award
for Best Guest Actress.Copy !req
226. I need your help with a break-in.Copy !req
227. BoJack, I've been out of prison
for two minutes.Copy !req
228. What took you so long?Copy !req
229. Kelsey, Mr. Peanutbutter and I
are gonna break into the library.Copy !req
230. But the problem is,
the place is crawling with cops.Copy !req
231. They're on high alertCopy !req
232. because some idiot
stole this model last night.Copy !req
233. Yeah, nice work, Todd.Copy !req
234. Who am I kidding?
I can't stay mad at you. You're adorable.Copy !req
235. Look at your big saucer eyes.
I can go swimming in them!Copy !req
236. - Totally.
- Now, we need to lose the cops.Copy !req
237. The rest of you will create a diversionCopy !req
238. by breaking into the only other place
in Yorba Linda of cultural significance:Copy !req
239. the Discount Fine Art Gallery
in the strip mall,Copy !req
240. between the tanning salon
and the adult bookstore.Copy !req
241. Once you set off the alarm,
all the cops will go there.Copy !req
242. Now, things could get ugly.
One of you is very likely to die.Copy !req
243. - Possibly Alan.
- Why possibly Alan?Copy !req
244. Well, you are the guy
none of us knows that well.Copy !req
245. I just came to fix your cable.Copy !req
246. Alan, you already know too much.
You're a part of this now, like it or not.Copy !req
247. - But...
- Hey, you think you could keep it down?Copy !req
248. I'm reading a script
and I'm having trouble focusing,Copy !req
249. so now my notes are
gonna be confusing and vague.Copy !req
250. We're almost done.Copy !req
251. I know you're having fun
with your police cars,Copy !req
252. I just wish you would have asked
before you invited these people over.Copy !req
253. - I live here, too.
- You're right. I'm sorry.Copy !req
254. And can you at least let Alan
fix the cable before he dies?Copy !req
255. I can't die. I'm endangered!Copy !req
256. "And the truffle-infused gnocchi
was the star dishCopy !req
257. at this up-and-comer that will please
the pickiest of BrooklynitesCopy !req
258. and the less discerning Staten Islander."Copy !req
259. When I grow up, I can be food critic
for New Yorker?Copy !req
260. You can do anything you want in life.Copy !req
261. Not everyone can write for The New Yorker,Copy !req
262. but there's always The Atlantic.Copy !req
263. Diane,Copy !req
264. I'm concerned you're spending
a lot of time with this sickly child.Copy !req
265. Remember, you're supposed
to be writing about me.Copy !req
266. Sure, but isn't this why we're here?
To help these people?Copy !req
267. I'm here to help these people.Copy !req
268. You're here to help me help them
by writing a book about meCopy !req
269. so people back home will give money
to my foundation.Copy !req
270. Great.Copy !req
271. Okay, come on. Over here. Get it.Copy !req
272. We're in. It's too late to turn back now.Copy !req
273. One of us isn't going
to come out of this alive.Copy !req
274. Why do you all keep saying that?Copy !req
275. Why can't we all assume we're gonna
make it out alive and go from there?Copy !req
276. Alan, we've got enough problems without
worrying about your imminent death.Copy !req
277. Can't we just all shut up and do this?Copy !req
278. Why does everything have to be
a big, complicated mess?Copy !req
279. Like,
look at this Thomas Kinkade painting.Copy !req
280. It's simple.Copy !req
281. And serene. And... pleasant.Copy !req
282. I think that the vest
makes me look kind of chunky.Copy !req
283. I don't do CrossFit five days a week
to not look sweet in this uniform.Copy !req
284. I swear to God,
if you don't shut up about CrossFit...Copy !req
285. Break-in at the DiscountCopy !req
286. Fine Art Gallery at the strip mall.Copy !req
287. Let's roll!
That's a thing we say at CrossFit.Copy !req
288. Remember when my character
on Mr. Peanutbutter's House wasCopy !req
289. - elected president?
- Let me guess, it was all a dream?Copy !req
290. No, I served half a term,
then resignedCopy !req
291. because when Zachary
had a bad time with peer pressure,Copy !req
292. I realized I was spending
too much time being presidentCopy !req
293. and not enough time being a dad.Copy !req
294. It's like you didn't even watch my show.Copy !req
295. Okay, I'd like you here.Copy !req
296. And then you are going to be over here.Copy !req
297. - Freeze!
- I'm union.Copy !req
298. - Playing dead.
- Breaking and entering?Copy !req
299. That is against everything
Nixon stood for.Copy !req
300. We didn't mean to cause trouble.
We're trying to make a movie about Nixon.Copy !req
301. Yeah? What, another leftist screed
about how corrupt he was?Copy !req
302. - Uh...
- Or is it about how he hadCopy !req
303. an illegitimate son,Copy !req
304. and the son never knew who his dad was,
but always had a hunch it was Nixon,Copy !req
305. and then that son grew up to be
the security guard at the Nixon Library?Copy !req
306. The second one?Copy !req
307. Well, if that's true, how come you don't
have an actor here to play Nixon?Copy !req
308. Because...Copy !req
309. we couldn't find anyone who could
appropriately capture his magic.Copy !req
310. You know, I do a pretty good Nixon.Copy !req
311. You? No way.Copy !req
312. Hello, I'm Nixon.Copy !req
313. I can't be at your soccer game, but I am
your father and I love you very much.Copy !req
314. Oh, my God. He's perfect.Copy !req
315. We've found our Nixon.Copy !req
316. I can be ready in five.Copy !req
317. Uh. Did we get the shot?Copy !req
318. It's so peaceful.Copy !req
319. - Okay, folks.
- Aah!Copy !req
320. Party's over.
That's something we say at CrossFit.Copy !req
321. Ugh. Wait a sec... I know you!Copy !req
322. You were in Justified.
You were amazing.Copy !req
323. Okay, you caught me.Copy !req
324. I am kind of
a well-known character actress.Copy !req
325. I am such a huge fan, Miss, uh...Copy !req
326. What...? What's your name?Copy !req
327. Sure, of course.Copy !req
328. Everyone loves my work,
but apparently not enoughCopy !req
329. to watch the credits
and find out what my name is.Copy !req
330. The important thing is that we enjoy
your great performances, right?Copy !req
331. - How about you enjoy this? Aah!
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.Copy !req
332. Margo, I thought we agreed, no guns.Copy !req
333. Oh, is that what we agreed to?
I thought we said "no gum."Copy !req
334. But you're also chewing gum.Copy !req
335. I'm a wild card.Copy !req
336. - Aah!
- Return fire!Copy !req
337. Watch out!Copy !req
338. Oh, no! Alan's dead!Copy !req
339. No, I'm fine.
The bullet hit my cell phone.Copy !req
340. Oh, no! Alan's cell phone is dead!Copy !req
341. Nope, phone's fine, too.
Oh, hey, I got a text from my wife.Copy !req
342. She's going into labor.
Guys, I'm gonna be a dad!Copy !req
343. See you later!Copy !req
344. Die, you chunky assholes!Copy !req
345. See, Jeff?
This is what I'm talking about.Copy !req
346. Shoot!Copy !req
347. Oh.Copy !req
348. - How could this be any more perfect?
- Yoo-hoo.Copy !req
349. Vanessa Gekko.
How did you get in this painting?Copy !req
350. I'm your servant, of course.Copy !req
351. In your infinite generosity,
you gave me this jobCopy !req
352. when it became clear
that I don't have what it takesCopy !req
353. to be a "Hollywoo" power-agent.Copy !req
354. Also, my husband left me.Copy !req
355. And my children married each other
in an unholy incestuous union.Copy !req
356. Plus, I have, like, colitis or something.Copy !req
357. How appropriate!
Fetch me drink, wench.Copy !req
358. - Right away, ma'am.
- Ah.Copy !req
359. Diane...Copy !req
360. The second thing you notice
about Sebastian St. ClairCopy !req
361. is how much he talks about himself.Copy !req
362. This way is the library I built.Copy !req
363. And over there is the statue
of me building the library.Copy !req
364. And on that wall is a painting
of me posing for the statue.Copy !req
365. - Put a chapter in your book about that.
- Uh-huh.Copy !req
366. The only respite
from his constant bombast is sleep,Copy !req
367. and even then, sometimes...Copy !req
368. Everybody...
Those of you who can walk, I mean.Copy !req
369. Let's drag these corpses
to the mass grave behind the playground.Copy !req
370. We need to make room
for my new hospital.Copy !req
371. - Where's Kinko? Is he okay?
- Oh, no, no, he's certainly dead.Copy !req
372. See, Diane,
I told you not to make friends.Copy !req
373. Jesus, you don't care
about any of these people.Copy !req
374. You're just using them as props
for your big-shot superhero act.Copy !req
375. Diane, the dead will not benefit
from our grief,Copy !req
376. but the survivors need a new hospital
and we need to build it.Copy !req
377. This is too much.Copy !req
378. If you're going to survive,
you'll need to harden up.Copy !req
379. I asked you to join me
because I thought you could handle it.Copy !req
380. - But if you can't, you can go home.
- I...Copy !req
381. I can handle it.Copy !req
382. Great! Let's drag some bodies!
Kinko! Oh, never mind.Copy !req
383. Hey, um, how come Nixon gets a line
and I don't get a line?Copy !req
384. We only gave him a line
so he wouldn't call the police.Copy !req
385. - If I call the police, will I get a line?
- No, we won't use it in the movie.Copy !req
386. We only need the one-shot of me.Copy !req
387. I just think if he gets a line,
I should get a line.Copy !req
388. - Ugh. Actors.
- Okay, positions everyone. And... action.Copy !req
389. I'm Nixon.Copy !req
390. The way you're feeling
about your dead brother is how I feelCopy !req
391. about the son I'll never know.Copy !req
392. But I look at the moon and so does he.
That's how I know we're connected.Copy !req
393. And I'm Checkers.Copy !req
394. All right, so, BoJack,Copy !req
395. you've been told
that your brother, Jeffretariat,Copy !req
396. the one Nixon sent to Vietnam
in your place, is dead.Copy !req
397. You're feeling the weight of that guilt.Copy !req
398. And the tears start to flow.Copy !req
399. And the tears start to flow.Copy !req
400. Oh. I don't cry in front of other people.Copy !req
401. Well, you need to.
This is the emotional climax of the movie.Copy !req
402. Yeah, okay, but I don't cry in front
of other people. I can't.Copy !req
403. Really, never? Come on.Copy !req
404. What if someone tells you
they'll take you to the park,Copy !req
405. and they keep talking about the park
and all the fun you'll have,Copy !req
406. but then...Copy !req
407. But then they don't take you to the park.
I need a second.Copy !req
408. Well, I'm sorry, I can't do it.
I didn't know you wanted me to cry.Copy !req
409. Can you give us the room, please?Copy !req
410. There's a park right outside
we can hang out at.Copy !req
411. - Oh!
- Oh, we can't, the sprinklers are on.Copy !req
412. Ah.Copy !req
413. Well, another beautiful, serene day
in magical fantasy-painting world.Copy !req
414. Queen Princess Carolyn, if I may,
I have some exciting news.Copy !req
415. I just landed a new client.Copy !req
416. - The mill owner!
- Huh?Copy !req
417. We're doing a three-picture deal
about his waterwheel.Copy !req
418. - Wait, you're making deals here?
- I'll say.Copy !req
419. I'm now the biggest agent
in the entire idyllic New England village.Copy !req
420. It's like you don't even read
the idyllic New England village trades.Copy !req
421. What? No!Copy !req
422. You're polluting my perfect serene
dream life. Why is this happening?Copy !req
423. I don't know. It's your fantasy.Copy !req
424. But if you ask me, I don't think
you want perfect and sereneCopy !req
425. and enough time to catch up
on The Good Wife.Copy !req
426. Stop kidding yourself,
Princess Carolyn.Copy !req
427. If you really wanted the simple life,
you'd have a simple life.Copy !req
428. Oh, my God. I gotta get out of here.Copy !req
429. Bye!Copy !req
430. Hey. Yeah, I got rid of her.
Now this place is all mine.Copy !req
431. Get your demo guys together.Copy !req
432. Let's tear this old Tudor down
and put up some condos!Copy !req
433. Okay.Copy !req
434. This isn't just for me.Copy !req
435. It's for John Carroll Lynch,
C.C.H. Pounder,Copy !req
436. and all the other character actors
who live in lucrative obscurity.Copy !req
437. The blood I spill today is for us all!Copy !req
438. I'm character actress Margo Martindale!Copy !req
439. Yeah, I'm going to go
with Princess Carolyn.Copy !req
440. Hmm.Copy !req
441. - Hello?
- Hey.Copy !req
442. There you are!
I've been trying to call you all week.Copy !req
443. - Yeah, the coverage in Cordovia is...
- Diane, Diane.Copy !req
444. Listen, I gotta tell you:Copy !req
445. I'm sorry I gave you such
a hard time about your trip.Copy !req
446. The truth is,
I really am so proud of you.Copy !req
447. A lot of people talk big,Copy !req
448. but you're actually out there
helping people.Copy !req
449. You're the real deal, Diane.Copy !req
450. - Yeah...
- How is it there? Is it amazing?Copy !req
451. It's... good.Copy !req
452. It's hard, but it's good.Copy !req
453. I miss you.Copy !req
454. I miss you, too, but I promise,Copy !req
455. these six months are gonna fly by.Copy !req
456. Yeah. How's the game show going?Copy !req
457. Oh, shit, I completely forgot I'm supposed
to be hosting a game show right now.Copy !req
458. I gotta go.Copy !req
459. And that's when you realizeCopy !req
460. that the book you've been writing
in your headCopy !req
461. is never actually going to be a book,
so you stop...Copy !req
462. I know what you're gonna say.Copy !req
463. I'm a dumb sitcom actor
who's in over his head.Copy !req
464. I'm sorry that I thought I could do this.Copy !req
465. And I'm sorry I made you come here.Copy !req
466. I'm sorry for everything.
I don't know what I'm doing.Copy !req
467. BoJack, sit down.Copy !req
468. You've just been told your brother is dead
and that it's your fault.Copy !req
469. But this moment is bigger than that.Copy !req
470. This is the moment
that Secretariat stops running.Copy !req
471. Because this is the moment you realizeCopy !req
472. something inside you is broken,
and it can never be fixed.Copy !req
473. We got it.Copy !req
474. Really? I didn't cry.Copy !req
475. You didn't have to.
Turteltaub's gonna love this.Copy !req
476. - Oh. All right.
- Thanks for talking me into this.Copy !req
477. Just so you know, I'm really glad
we're making this movie together.Copy !req
478. - Didn't know I had it in me, did you?
- No, I knew.Copy !req
479. Huh.Copy !req
480. - Hold the elevator, please.
- Coming in?Copy !req
481. - I'm all in.
- Whoa!Copy !req
482. Mommy, it's nearly Christmas.
Where's Uncle Secretariat?Copy !req
483. He had to go win a race
against the Russians.Copy !req
484. But maybe, if he runs really fast...Copy !req
485. - Hey, where's Kelsey?
- Oh, yeah, funny story.Copy !req
486. Turns out you two knuckleheads
snuck out last nightCopy !req
487. and got that shot
I told you not to get for the sceneCopy !req
488. - that's not in the movie anymore.
- Uh...Copy !req
489. Silly me, I didn't like that.
So I fired her ass.Copy !req
490. - What?
- We got a movie to finish, okay?Copy !req
491. So, go get in costume,Copy !req
492. get your butt up that chimney,
and do your thing, Hamlet.Copy !req
493. Just maybe,
all we have to do is believe!Copy !req
494. What are you doing here?Copy !req
495. Hey, is it cool if I crash here
for a couple nights?Copy !req
496. I didn't know where else to go.Copy !req
497. Boxer versus raptor.
Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na.Copy !req