1. This is from BoJack H.
BoJack is nine years old.Copy !req
2. "When I grow up, I want to be like you.
I'm on the right track.Copy !req
3. Get it? Track? Because horses
run on tracks and you are a horse.Copy !req
4. And I am a horse. Do you get it?
Do you get my joke about the track?"Copy !req
5. - There's a whole page of this.
- Should I write him, tell him I get it?Copy !req
6. He goes on. "My question for you is:Copy !req
7. I am a good kid and I like to play,Copy !req
8. and I like to go to school,
but sometimes I get sad.Copy !req
9. What do you do when you get sad?
How do you not be sad?"Copy !req
10. Oh, big stud, running off
to gallivant with your fillies.Copy !req
11. Is that to impress me?
I can smash a dinner plate, too.Copy !req
12. That's a salad plate.Copy !req
13. I thought these were salad plates.Copy !req
14. - Those are saucers.
- Why do we even have saucers?Copy !req
15. We don't drink tea.Copy !req
16. Those saucers are for entertaining!Copy !req
17. Oh, yeah? Well, I'm exit-taining.Copy !req
18. Do you get it?Copy !req
19. But, uh, seriously, folks.
Right?Copy !req
20. Don't sit so close to the TV,
it'll make you cruel.Copy !req
21. You know, I was beautifulCopy !req
22. - before I got pregnant.
- I know.Copy !req
23. - You ruined me, BoJack.
- I know.Copy !req
24. You better grow up to be something great
to make up for all the damage you've done.Copy !req
25. I will.Copy !req
26. and I just kept running. BoJack...Copy !req
27. Okay, enough me being a great mom.Copy !req
28. I'm gonna go hide
your father's heart medication.Copy !req
29. Enjoy your dumb little TV show.Copy !req
30. The first thing is,
you gotta believe that change is possible.Copy !req
31. You have to tell yourself every day:Copy !req
32. "I can change and I will change."Copy !req
33. - I can change and I will change.
- Louder.Copy !req
34. I can change and I will change.Copy !req
35. - Still can't hear you.
- You're an audiobook.Copy !req
36. "I've got a new attitude."Copy !req
37. That's what your face should be saying
to everyone you pass on the street.Copy !req
38. We call that the PANTS approach.Copy !req
39. P-A-N-T-S.Copy !req
40. People all need to see.Copy !req
41. People all need to see.Copy !req
42. Yeah, a little to the right.
No, house right.Copy !req
43. That's an acting term.
It means left. I'm an actor.Copy !req
44. No.Copy !req
45. - BoJack, why did I wake up in an alley?
- I had to get rid of the old couch, Todd.Copy !req
46. While I was sleeping on it?Copy !req
47. The couch was a metaphor
for my old attitude.Copy !req
48. My audiobook told me I had to let go
of the burdens of my life sofa.Copy !req
49. Oh, you know what?
Maybe it was "my life so far."Copy !req
50. I feel like
you could've woken me up first.Copy !req
51. Todd, no one can wake anybody else up.
You need to wake yourself up.Copy !req
52. I don't know if I trust this new guy.
I'm just gonna go sleep in your car.Copy !req
53. - Uh-oh. I think someone needs a FAB.
- A FAB?Copy !req
54. FAB, stands for fresh active BNA.Copy !req
55. - BNA?
- Brand-new attitude. Try to keep up.Copy !req
56. ATTITUDE stands for attention to...Copy !req
57. Did you also get rid of my stuff?
Where's my duffel bag?Copy !req
58. I value you.
Hashtag "thank you for being a friend."Copy !req
59. Hashtag "PANTS."Copy !req
60. You got to conquer that hill.Copy !req
61. The hill is a metaphor.Copy !req
62. Everything is a metaphor.Copy !req
63. - You are literally a metaphor.
- Oh, my God.Copy !req
64. Oh, my God, this is the worst.Copy !req
65. This feels awful.Copy !req
66. Why does anybody run?Copy !req
67. On your right.Copy !req
68. And she had no idea
that her boyfriend was the strangler.Copy !req
69. I guess some people just see what
they wanna see, right, Vincent?Copy !req
70. Um...Copy !req
71. - Yeah.
- Hey, Princess Carolyn.Copy !req
72. I gotta go.
One of my dumb-ass clients is here.Copy !req
73. Just out for a jog, thought I'd say hello.
I jog now.Copy !req
74. You jogged here from Laurel Canyon?Copy !req
75. I drove, but I moved my arm a bunch,
so the Fitbit counted the miles.Copy !req
76. Uh, someone named BoJark Hoseman
is here?Copy !req
77. - Thank you, Stuart.
- Also, your coffee is coming late.Copy !req
78. - Just like you ordered.
- I said "latte."Copy !req
79. Ah. Well, I wrote down "late,"
so that's what it's gonna be.Copy !req
80. - What happened to Laura?
- Assistants are like Belushi brothers.Copy !req
81. Good ones leave too soon,
bad ones never go away.Copy !req
82. It's a beautiful day, though, right?
Every morning is a miracle.Copy !req
83. Hashtag "miracle."
Hashtag "every morning."Copy !req
84. Hashtag "every morning is a miracle."
Hashtag "BoJack thoughts."Copy !req
85. I'm glad you found your bliss, but are you
ready for your first day on set tomorrow?Copy !req
86. You mean, am I amped?
Because I am so pumped.Copy !req
87. This Secretariat movie is a big deal.Copy !req
88. Please do not blow it.Copy !req
89. Why would I blow it?
I have a brand-new attitude.Copy !req
90. You know, when I won that Golden Globe
last month, I went to a very dark place.Copy !req
91. I was in a hole.Copy !req
92. And I realized, "I can wallow
in this hole or I can change."Copy !req
93. While I was tempted to go with the former,
sometimes the only way out of a holeCopy !req
94. is a latter.Copy !req
95. - No pun intended.
- You clearly intended that pun.Copy !req
96. Princess Carolyn,
you gotta believe in the AHP of TPE.Copy !req
97. Huh.Copy !req
98. - Uh-uh. I'm not asking.
- The awesome healing power...Copy !req
99. - I am not asking.
- Of total positive energy.Copy !req
100. You should leave because
I'm about to pretend to get a phone call.Copy !req
101. Hello?
No, he's still here.Copy !req
102. - No, he's not taking the hint somehow.
- Mm-hm.Copy !req
103. Honey, where's my bandana?Copy !req
104. You chewed it up,
we had to throw it away, remember?Copy !req
105. No, not that one.Copy !req
106. The one with the bones on it.Copy !req
107. With the meat juice stains?
The one I wore to the Emmys.Copy !req
108. I don't know. I gotta go.
BoJack's gonna be here any minute.Copy !req
109. Did you check the hall closet?Copy !req
110. I can't see anything in this stupid thing.Copy !req
111. I know, Mr. Peanutbutter.Copy !req
112. But you gotta keep it on
for one more week.Copy !req
113. I look like an idiot.Copy !req
114. You look very responsible.Copy !req
115. Is the bandana doing anything?Copy !req
116. Hey, work buddy,
first day on the job, huh?Copy !req
117. Hashtag "great day to start fresh
at a new job, sincerely, BoJack."Copy !req
118. - @Diane.
- Can't believe you wanted to carpool.Copy !req
119. - Gotta save the planet, Diane.
- Hey, is that BoJack Horseman?Copy !req
120. I don't know because I have no peripheral
vision. Going off of smell here.Copy !req
121. Mr. Peanutbutter, how the hell are you?Copy !req
122. - Loving it, buddy. Loving life.
- Brother, I am right there with you.Copy !req
123. I got a brand-new attitude
and I am also loving life.Copy !req
124. Uh...Copy !req
125. Diane, look at us.
A couple life-lovers over here.Copy !req
126. - Uh...
- Is that a new cone? Looking sharp, PB.Copy !req
127. It is a new cone.
Is it obvious I'm wearing a cone?Copy !req
128. Didn't notice.
You've got the smile of a winner.Copy !req
129. - What's going on?
- I have to wear the coneCopy !req
130. so I don't gnaw on the stitches I had
to get when I punched a mirror last week.Copy !req
131. I got drunk and thought my reflection
was another dog.Copy !req
132. I was so mad at that other dog.Copy !req
133. He was wearing my clothes.Copy !req
134. - We've all been there.
- I don't understand what's happening.Copy !req
135. Did someone say something to the left?
Diane, is that you?Copy !req
136. Hey, why don't we just us two schedj
a hang for this 'kend?Copy !req
137. "'Kend" is how I say weekend now.Copy !req
138. Uh, I love that. And I got a pair of tix
to the 'Stones show this 'kend.Copy !req
139. - Wanna go?
- The Rolling Stones?Copy !req
140. What? Oh, no, no, no.
The Mighty Mighty Bosstones.Copy !req
141. I'm not really familiar with that outfit,
but I do love trying new things.Copy !req
142. - Who are you?
- Anyway, we gotta get to work.Copy !req
143. It was really great talking to you,
Mr. Peanutbutter.Copy !req
144. All right, break a leg, good buddy.
Diane, BoJack's ready to go.Copy !req
145. Where are you, sweetheart?
Are you ready?Copy !req
146. The house is a metaphor for a home.Copy !req
147. Happiness is a metaphor for change.Copy !req
148. Happiness is a metaphor...Copy !req
149. - Where are we going?
- Oh, my God.Copy !req
150. BoJack, this is Corduroy
Jackson-Jackson, your costar.Copy !req
151. - Hey, man.
- Corduroy Jackson-Jackson.Copy !req
152. Oh, right, the underwear guy.Copy !req
153. Underwear model/actor/dancer/dreamer.Copy !req
154. Also, you know, I'm a huge fan.
I'm so excited/amped/pumpedCopy !req
155. to be working with you.
Yeah.Copy !req
156. Hey, man, that's
fantastic/great/I-ran-out-of-things.Copy !req
157. - Hi. Kelsey Jannings?
- That depends.Copy !req
158. - Are you my ex-wife's lawyer?
- I'm Diane.Copy !req
159. I'm here to be a character consultant.Copy !req
160. - What?
- I got a call from the studio.Copy !req
161. Okay. Why don't you stand over there and
make sure no one trips over that cable?Copy !req
162. - This cable?
- Do you have a thousand dollars?Copy !req
163. - What?
- Because each minuteCopy !req
164. I spend talking to you,
that's how much money I'm wasting.Copy !req
165. - Oh. Sorry.
- Hey, who's this guy?Copy !req
166. - Who let this guy in?
- I just...Copy !req
167. He's got a funny face. I like your face.Copy !req
168. - Thank you.
- What a cute funny face. Cookie?Copy !req
169. Can someone get this guy a cookie?Copy !req
170. He's got a soothing face
and I like looking at it.Copy !req
171. - Like a Matisse painting.
- Whoa.Copy !req
172. Guys, could I get
everyone's attention, please?Copy !req
173. Oh, watch out for the cable.
Don't trip over the cable.Copy !req
174. I just want everyone to know
what an honor it is to be here.Copy !req
175. Secretariat has always been
a personal hero of mine.Copy !req
176. A complex role that requires
a precise touch and a deft handCopy !req
177. and I just can't wait to tackle it
head-on.Copy !req
178. It's truly an honor.Copy !req
179. Namaste.Copy !req
180. Neat. So, in this scene,
Secretariat's at his lowest.Copy !req
181. He just lost his first race,
his father was sent to the glue factory.Copy !req
182. It's a dark moment.Copy !req
183. - You got it.
- Scene 22 alpha, take one.Copy !req
184. - Action!
- Hey, Secretariat.Copy !req
185. What are you doing here?Copy !req
186. - Hello?
- Diane!Copy !req
187. I can't tell you how disappointed I amCopy !req
188. you're not here with me
in Northern Cordovia.Copy !req
189. I'm incredibly disappointed. Boo!Copy !req
190. I didn't think I could do it,
but I did it.Copy !req
191. I'm amazing.Copy !req
192. Sebastian,
I know you're doing important work.Copy !req
193. I couldn't just drop everything
and fly to the Third World.Copy !req
194. - I just got married, and...
- Diane.Copy !req
195. People are dying, and I'm witnessing it.Copy !req
196. And I need people
to witness me witnessing it.Copy !req
197. I know, and I'll be there in three months,
as soon as I'm done on the movie.Copy !req
198. This is also important.Copy !req
199. In a way.Copy !req
200. Well, lucky for you,
there'll still be just as much famineCopy !req
201. and war and devastation
in three months.Copy !req
202. I'm not dead yet.Copy !req
203. - Yep. Lucky me.
- We're still rolling, people.Copy !req
204. So, BoJack, in this scene,
Secretariat is sad, right?Copy !req
205. Afraid he's gonna lose his scholarship.Copy !req
206. Oh, sure. Yeah, sad. Of course. Duh.Copy !req
207. Okay, here we go. Action.Copy !req
208. Hey, Secretariat.Copy !req
209. What are you doing here?Copy !req
210. That was bad. I know that was bad.
Let's keep it rolling.Copy !req
211. - I'll say when to keep rolling.
- Okay.Copy !req
212. What are you doing here? Did we get it?
I can tell by your face that we didn't.Copy !req
213. All right, let me try again.
What are you doing...?Copy !req
214. I am having trouble with the words.
Is it okay if I play around with it a bit?Copy !req
215. When did you get here?
Sorry, no. Got it. Got it. Got it.Copy !req
216. Man, these lights are bright, huh?Copy !req
217. Can we kill these lights at all?
Is that a...?Copy !req
218. - No.
- Okay, I'm sad.Copy !req
219. I'm sad. Acting sad.Copy !req
220. Secretariat is sad.Copy !req
221. Okay, here we go.Copy !req
222. I'm sad!Copy !req
223. Sorry, what was the line?Copy !req
224. I don't know if this helps or not,
but when Secretariat was a kidCopy !req
225. - he actually...
- Aah!Copy !req
226. - My face!
- Hey, hey.Copy !req
227. - Whoa, whoa!
- Oh, my God.Copy !req
228. - Watch out!
- Hey.Copy !req
229. Whoa, whoa!Copy !req
230. Oh, my God. My face.Copy !req
231. My beautiful face.Copy !req
232. Why didn't someone tell me
not to trip over that cable?Copy !req
233. It was such an important job,
but no one was there to do itCopy !req
234. and now my face is in ruins.Copy !req
235. We're gonna need a couple of days
to rebuild this set.Copy !req
236. So, let's all just use this time
to regroupCopy !req
237. and really figure out what we're doingCopy !req
238. and why we're here.Copy !req
239. So, let me get this straight.
Bad means good?Copy !req
240. Maybe you should leave the teen-talk
to me. Jeezy Kableezy.Copy !req
241. Well, it wasn't Ibsen.Copy !req
242. That's your takeaway?
That your son's TV show wasn't Ibsen?Copy !req
243. I'm sorry. Did you need a compliment?Copy !req
244. Oh, I loved the part where you got
your head caught in the banister.Copy !req
245. - Yeah...
- And what's this letter I have?Copy !req
246. It's from the government saying,
"I'm proud of you."Copy !req
247. - Are you...?
- No, what I'm holding is nothing.Copy !req
248. Can you check on our drinks?
I would love some gin.Copy !req
249. I wouldn't drink anything out of an open
container. This town is full of AIDS.Copy !req
250. - That's not...
- You're a clown, you know that?Copy !req
251. You've always been a pillar of support.Copy !req
252. Gin, please? Is there gin coming?Copy !req
253. I'm here, aren't I?
I suffered through that ordeal.Copy !req
254. You know, the man sitting next to me
was wearing a T-shirt?Copy !req
255. A T-shirt, BoJack, in the theater.Copy !req
256. Yes, a T-shirt.Copy !req
257. Worst thing that's happened to anyone
in a theater.Copy !req
258. - The T-shirt told me to "just do it."
- Here we go.Copy !req
259. I don't know to what "it"
the T-shirt referredCopy !req
260. but I won't be spoken to in that tone
by an article of clothing.Copy !req
261. Vodka? Triple sec?
Looking for any alcohol.Copy !req
262. You don't know how lucky you are.Copy !req
263. I hope you die before I do so you never
know what it's like to lose a mother.Copy !req
264. As long as one of us dies,
that's good enough.Copy !req
265. Can we please get some alcohol
into my mouth?Copy !req
266. The past is past.Copy !req
267. That's why it's called the past.Copy !req
268. Tomorrow is an opportunity.Copy !req
269. You can be big and proud
and bang on your tom-tom drumCopy !req
270. or you can get in your boat and row.Copy !req
271. Tom or row.Copy !req
272. Tomorrow.Copy !req
273. - Hey, do you wanna talk?
- Talk? Why? Why would we do that?Copy !req
274. So you can put everything
in a book and sell a million copies?Copy !req
275. Wow. Uh...Copy !req
276. That's what the old me would have said.
The new me doesn't hold a grudge.Copy !req
277. - No.
- I gotta say,Copy !req
278. the new you seems a little on edge.Copy !req
279. What? Me?
I'm as cool as The Fonz in a meat locker.Copy !req
280. That's a metaphor, Diane.Copy !req
281. - It's a simile.
- Goddamn it.Copy !req
282. Oh, okay. Hello?Copy !req
283. Small talk, small talk, small talk.
Are you blowing it?Copy !req
284. - I heard you're blowing it.
- What? Who told you that? Was it Todd?Copy !req
285. You gotta turn this ship around, BoJ.
If you don't...Copy !req
286. Hey, can you hold on a second?
I'm getting another call.Copy !req
287. Well, if it isn't my friend, Rutabaga,
the boy prince of the 26th floor.Copy !req
288. Carolyn.
How are things all the way up on 27?Copy !req
289. Stomp once for good, twice for killing it.Copy !req
290. Killing...Copy !req
291. Give me some gossip.Copy !req
292. My wife is making me go
to the opera tonight.Copy !req
293. I need something to distract me
from the thought of D-bagsCopy !req
294. singing songs in German
about their boners.Copy !req
295. Okay, you gotta
keep this close to the vestCopy !req
296. but I am inches
from getting Emily VanCampCopy !req
297. the lead in Goose Van Sant's
new movie about Jackie O.Copy !req
298. My clients would f-l-ip
if I got them parts like that.Copy !req
299. You're killing it
in the department of kicking assCopy !req
300. in regards to you being an agent
and being good at it, crushing it.Copy !req
301. You're not so bad yourself, Rutabaga,
for a 26er.Copy !req
302. You're the only one in this building
who isn't a total snooze-cooze.Copy !req
303. Yes, Natasha, I'm talking about you.
I know you're listening.Copy !req
304. Ugh. I gotta go. I made Natasha cry.Copy !req
305. I don't think she's coming back.Copy !req
306. Could we keep it down
in the front, please?Copy !req
307. - Thank you.
- What am I gonna do?Copy !req
308. Well, you were an actor for nine years
on Horsin' Around. How did you do that?Copy !req
309. Uh...Copy !req
310. - Hey, can I talk to you for a minute?
- Of course, buddy.Copy !req
311. I always have time for you,
my good friend BoJackCopy !req
312. in this, the year 1988.Copy !req
313. Have a seat.Copy !req
314. Hey, enough with the stomping already!Copy !req
315. - Am I... Am I a clown?
- Oh, brother.Copy !req
316. Didn't I tell you not to invite your mom
to the taping?Copy !req
317. As Max Headroom would say,
"Your m-m-mom is a b-b-bitch."Copy !req
318. But I am a good actor, right?Copy !req
319. BJ, I don't know. Look...
You know what you're good at?Copy !req
320. Hitting your mark, saying your lines,
loudly with good diction.Copy !req
321. Should I be doing more?
To capture the characterCopy !req
322. - and make the audience connect?
- This is a situation comedy.Copy !req
323. No one watches this show to feel feelings.
Life is depressing enough already.Copy !req
324. You bring joy to millions of people.Copy !req
325. Maybe someday later,
you'll need to learn how to act for real.Copy !req
326. But for now,
don't worry about it.Copy !req
327. Oh, shit. I'm not an actor.Copy !req
328. All this time, I assumed there was more
to me than everyone thoughtCopy !req
329. but maybe there isn't.Copy !req
330. That's the part where you're supposed
to disagree with me.Copy !req
331. Oh, right.Copy !req
332. Well, you got the part, didn't you?
What did you do in the audition?Copy !req
333. Well, how should I know?
That was the old me.Copy !req
334. Now I've got a brand-new attitude.Copy !req
335. Oh, God. Okay. Okay.
What should I do?Copy !req
336. Make a break for it? Drive to Mexico?Copy !req
337. Start a new life there?
Meet a local girl? Fall in love?Copy !req
338. Talk my way into a job at a textile plant?Copy !req
339. Work my way up until I own the place?Copy !req
340. What am I talking about?
I can't run a textile plant.Copy !req
341. Too much responsibility. What am I
gonna do? The walls are closing in!Copy !req
342. BoJack, breathe. You can do this.Copy !req
343. You have two days.
Maybe you could hire an acting coach.Copy !req
344. - Yeah?
- Yeah.Copy !req
345. Plus, you can watch old
Secretariat videos.Copy !req
346. I've got a hard drive full of research.Copy !req
347. Yeah. Yeah, you're right.
You're right. I can do this.Copy !req
348. I've got two whole days.Copy !req
349. And when the pressure's on,
that's when I shine.Copy !req
350. Yeah. Two days.
I can do all those things.Copy !req
351. Oh, shit. I didn't do any of those things.Copy !req
352. - What are you doing here?
- Ah!Copy !req
353. That was it. Say that again.Copy !req
354. What are you doing here?Copy !req
355. - Okay.
- No?Copy !req
356. BoJack, before we get startedCopy !req
357. - I wanted to show you this.
- What?Copy !req
358. This is the machine
that's gonna make you a good actor.Copy !req
359. - Really?
- No. We need to make a scan of your faceCopy !req
360. so that if you die,
we can finish the movie.Copy !req
361. Standard procedure. When a star
is assessed to be of a certain liability,Copy !req
362. like if there was a whole book written
about what a reckless jackass he is,Copy !req
363. you make a digital replica so you're
not screwed if he goes all Belushi on you.Copy !req
364. - Wait, which Belushi?
- Hold still, please.Copy !req
365. - Terrific. We got it.
- One day, that's gonna be the job.Copy !req
366. Sit for five seconds
while a machine scans his face.Copy !req
367. Six months later,
plugging a movie on Kimmel.Copy !req
368. I gotta go on Kimmel now?
What if he makes me read a mean tweet?Copy !req
369. I'm not emotionally prepared.Copy !req
370. Don't worry so much.
If you can't do this partCopy !req
371. we'll just fire you and get someone else
who can. Either way, I'll be fine.Copy !req
372. What do you need, BoJack?Copy !req
373. I don't know. I thought I wanted this,
but now I'm feeling all this pressure.Copy !req
374. - Think you made a mistake, hiring me?
- I don't make mistakes, BoJack.Copy !req
375. I do the crossword in Sharpie,
I never learned the shortcut for undo.Copy !req
376. - Command-Z.
- Don't need it, won't use it.Copy !req
377. I'm trying to have this new attitude,
be this better, more positive guy.Copy !req
378. I keep thinking about how this movie
is my last shot at happiness.Copy !req
379. Well, BoJack, I hope this helps:Copy !req
380. I don't care if you are happy or not.Copy !req
381. You have a job to do.Copy !req
382. This guy again? I'm in love with this kid.
I wanna put you in my pocket.Copy !req
383. - You're adorable.
- Aw.Copy !req
384. - Hey, Diane, you're a writer, aren't you?
- Yes.Copy !req
385. Yes. I am a writer. What do you need?Copy !req
386. Can you write on a sign
"watch out for cable"?Copy !req
387. You were telling people,
but it's a really important jobCopy !req
388. and a sign is less likely
to get distracted.Copy !req
389. Oh. Yeah. Okay.Copy !req
390. What are you doing here?Copy !req
391. What are you doing here?Copy !req
392. What are you doing here?Copy !req
393. - What are you doing here?
- So, I went a little overboardCopy !req
394. and I made you two mixes.Copy !req
395. The first CD is all Mighty Mighty.Copy !req
396. The second CD is all of the Bosstones'
side projects and solo singles.Copy !req
397. Listen to it and imagine the band
never took that hiatusCopy !req
398. in the mid-aughts
when America briefly lost interest in ska.Copy !req
399. I don't have time.
I don't wanna listen to your music.Copy !req
400. I don't wanna hang out.
Get out of here.Copy !req
401. All right. You don't wanna listen
to Bosstones together.Copy !req
402. That's the impression that I get.Copy !req
403. - Is it the impression that I get?
- Yes. That's the impression that you get.Copy !req
404. I see. Way to go, Mr. Peanutbutter.
What a stupid move. Why did you...?Copy !req
405. BoJack, listen, I know you're scared,
but it's gonna be okay.Copy !req
406. - You gotta be strong.
- Yeah, but...Copy !req
407. You gotta rise to the occasion, okay?
So what if the new couch is weird?Copy !req
408. - Or lumpy?
- Uh, what?Copy !req
409. What are you gonna do?
Just sleep in BoJack's car forever?Copy !req
410. - Are you talking to me, or you...?
- Damn it, time to stop being a coward.Copy !req
411. It's time to go home
and sleep on BoJack's couch. Hurray!Copy !req
412. Happy ending for Todd!Copy !req
413. Charley Witherspoon, 28th floor agent.Copy !req
414. Charley. Listen, I wanted to touch base
about Emily's start date on Jackie O.Copy !req
415. Oh, yeah. Uh...Copy !req
416. Well, we got some new screen testsCopy !req
417. and, uh, Goose decided to go
in a different direction.Copy !req
418. Are you saying the Van Sant camp
wants to recant on VanCamp?Copy !req
419. Because they can't.Copy !req
420. Uh...Copy !req
421. Charley, you better get your client
to change his mindCopy !req
422. - or I'll walk up to the 28th floor and...
- Just kidding.Copy !req
423. - I can't get to the phone right now.
- What?Copy !req
424. This is one of those answering machines
that sounds like it's Charley talkingCopy !req
425. but it's actually
just an answering machine.Copy !req
426. - I know you're there, Charley.
- Leave a message.Copy !req
427. - I'm not gonna leave a message.
- Beep.Copy !req
428. Hey, Charley, Princess Carolyn again.
Listen...Copy !req
429. - Mailbox is full.
- What? Mailbox full?Copy !req
430. - Error. Message deleted.
- Wait... No...Copy !req
431. Gotta go. Bye.Copy !req
432. Carolyn.Copy !req
433. Rutabaga, this is not a good time.Copy !req
434. Okay. Can I please just tell you
about the opera, though?Copy !req
435. - How did you like the opera?
- I loved it.Copy !req
436. Loved Tristan, loved Isolde,
cried like a bunny.Copy !req
437. Listen, my brain has been a-buzzingCopy !req
438. for the past few days
thinking about that Jackie O movie.Copy !req
439. I know it's your baby,
but I did make a few callsCopy !req
440. and got my Rooney a screen test.Copy !req
441. I put that movie together for my client.Copy !req
442. No, no, no, don't freak out.
It's just a screen test.Copy !req
443. But, honestly,
how fantaj would my Rooney beCopy !req
444. as a young Jackie Bouv?Copy !req
445. Stomp once for so fantaj,
twice for stupid-fantaj.Copy !req
446. Carolyn? I only heard one stomp.Copy !req
447. Oh. Carolyn, I heart you.
You're beautiful.Copy !req
448. I wish I met you before I got married.Copy !req
449. You can do it.Copy !req
450. Only you hold the keys
to the house that is you.Copy !req
451. The house is at the top of a hill.Copy !req
452. The hill is also you.Copy !req
453. Five minutes, Mr. Horseman.Copy !req
454. When you get your new attitude,Copy !req
455. you're gonna wave goodbye to the old...Copy !req
456. What do you want, Mom?Copy !req
457. Look who finally decided
to pick up the phone.Copy !req
458. - Do you need more blood?
- I don't need blood.Copy !req
459. - I read your book, BoJack.
- Oh.Copy !req
460. It takes a real narcissist to think
anyone wants to buy a book about him.Copy !req
461. You know how I feel about Anne Frank.Copy !req
462. - That was a diary.
- I read the parts about me.Copy !req
463. The things I said to you.Copy !req
464. You must think I'm a real monster.Copy !req
465. - Mom...
- I don't wanna fight you, BoJack.Copy !req
466. I just wanted to tell you I know.Copy !req
467. I know you wanna be happy,
but you won't be, and...Copy !req
468. - I'm sorry.
- What?Copy !req
469. It's not just you, you know.Copy !req
470. Your father and I, we...Copy !req
471. Well, you come by it honestly,
the ugliness inside you.Copy !req
472. You were born broken,
that's your birthright.Copy !req
473. And now you can fill your life
with projectsCopy !req
474. your books and your movies
and your little girlfriendsCopy !req
475. but it won't make you whole.Copy !req
476. You're BoJack Horseman.Copy !req
477. There's no cure for that.Copy !req
478. Anyway, do you remember
who directed The Philadelphia Story?Copy !req
479. Five letters, second letter U?Copy !req
480. - Lubitsch?
- No, BoJack. Goodbye.Copy !req
481. You need to visualize itCopy !req
482. flying out the window, over the...Copy !req
483. What are you doing here?Copy !req
484. Great. We got it. Let's move on.Copy !req
485. Boxer versus Raptor.
Na-na-na-na-na-na-na-na.Copy !req