1. Hey, little guy,
you're gonna become
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2. Part of a great burger today.
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3. (high-
I'm honored.
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4. What are you calling it?
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5. Jicama-tah-ta.
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6. (high-
Great joke!
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7. No making
the food talk, please.
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8. And you wonder why I'm the only
one who'll go shopping with you.
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9. Dad, look!
Wait, don't look now.
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10. Okay, now look.
Where?
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11. There.
Wh-what is it?
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12. An old asian man?
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13. That's not an old asian man.
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14. It's not?
It's hawk!
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15. Hawk?
Hawk! From hawk & chick!
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16. Father, look out!
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17. The jellyfish monster!
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18. Thank you, chick.
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19. Hi-yah!
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20. Father-daughter
samurai team
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21. Played by an actual
father and daughter.
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22. It's like they
based it on us.
I know.
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23. We could sue.
We won't, 'cause
we love these movies.
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24. But yeah, that's us.
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25. But is he the right age?
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26. How old was he
in his last movie?
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27. The one where they fight
the giant butterfly?
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28. Yeah.
Probably 40.
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29. And how old is that guy,
a hundred?
He's not a hundred.
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30. Well, you're 80,
so he's got to be at least 90.
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31. What's he doing
in our dumb town, anyway?
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32. Maybe he flies
from japan
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33. To buy
our mushrooms?
He's leaving the market.
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34. Should I shout his name?
No.
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35. We should leave him alone.
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36. Or we could
follow him.
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37. We kind of already are.
This is weird.
Let's go home,
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38. Live our lives
the best we can.
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39. I mean, we're poor,
but we're happy.
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40. He's crossing the street!
Move! Move!
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41. Sorry. Thank you.
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42. Ooh!
Sorry. Sorry.
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43. No! He's getting
on a bus!
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44. Well, we're not getting
on a bus to follow this guy.
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45. We should get off at
the next stop. It's not him.
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46. Both
It's him!
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47. It's rising hawk.
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48. Oh, my god.
Oh, my god.
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49. Where the hell are your
father and your sister?
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50. They should be
back by now.
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51. Maybe they're afraid
to be around me.
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52. 'cause I'm on fire.
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53. game, set, salt.
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54. Wow. She can't do
long division,
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55. But the girl can
slide a saltshaker.
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56. Who? Oh, me.
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57. I'm gonna
say something.
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58. What are you gonna say?
Say it to me like
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59. You're gonna
say it to him.
Okay, all right.
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60. Um, hi, mr. Kojima...
Terrible.
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61. What?
Ugh! Bad.
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62. Right, right, right.
Not ready. Not ready.
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63. Fourth floor.
Yeah.
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64. Stairs. Let's go.
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65. Wait, this is crazy.
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66. What's our plan?
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67. Um, get him to
sign your jicama?
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68. I don't...
I don't have a pen.
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69. Why are you follow me? Aah!
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70. joking! Joking!
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71. Oh. Oh, that-that's good.
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72. Y-you got us.
Did I get you?
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73. Yeah, very much.
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74. My little heart
is beating so fast.
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75. Yeah.
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76. I dropped my jicama.
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77. Uh, so... Shinji kojima?
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78. Please, call me kojima...
Or koji.
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79. Just don't call me
if I owe you money.
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80. I owe people money.
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81. Uh, uh, my name is bob.
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82. Uh, and this is
my daughter, louise.
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83. We've seen
all your movies.
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84. Am I screeching?
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85. I feel like
I'm screeching a little.
Yes.
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86. Sorry, you're kind of
a big deal for us.
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87. It's nice to
get recognized.
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88. We were wondering...
Why are you in our town?
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89. Did you get lost?
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90. Lots of people are here
because they got lost.
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91. Not lost.
Just looking...
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92. Okay.
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93. Wait, what-what does that mean?
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94. You kind of trailed off there.
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95. I have, uh, said too much.
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96. So, do you know
a good place to eat?
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97. Yes! Uh, we have a restaurant.
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98. No, no, no, no!
It's not good!
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99. It's really good.
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100. It's not good enough
for koji, dad!
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101. Is it good or not good?
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102. Good.
Not good.
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103. Good.
Oh, not good.
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104. Mmm! Good.
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105. Wow, so that's how
celebrities chew their food.
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106. I was all wrong.
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107. Celebrity chewing!
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108. I'd watch that show.
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109. Tina, take another picture
of me with koji.
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110. Let's do one where
we're laughing
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111. At a hilarious
thing I just said.
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112. But it's so smart
you don't get it
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113. For a second,
and then you do.
Hmm. Mmm?
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114. Oh, now I get it.
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115. Oh, he just got it.
He just got it.
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116. When I'm famous, I'll have
a handler whose only job
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117. Will be to keep people
like mom away from me.
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118. And mom, too, maybe.
What?
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119. Just kidding. You know
you'll live in my trailer.
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120. I want a copy
of that one.
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121. Oh, we don't
print our photos.
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122. They live in the camera.
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123. Guys, here it is!
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124. All the hawk & chicks
we recorded from tv.
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125. We've got a lot to choose from.
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126. Hawk & chick versus sharkman
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127. Or the classic hawk & chick
versus tsukumogami.
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128. What's a tsukumogami?
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129. Um, it's just an
object that comes
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130. To life every hundred years.
Oh!
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131. And in this case, it's a tree.
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132. So, they fight a tree? Cool.
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133. Well, there's more to it
than that, tina.
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134. It's about a barber
and his daughter traveling
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135. From village to village,
trying to avoid trouble...
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136. But trouble always
finds them.
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137. And then they kick
trouble's ass!
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138. Am I right? Looking
at you, koji.
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139. Looking back at you, louise.
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140. Wait, so these movies are
about traveling barbers
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141. Who fight weird
japanese monsters?
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142. So, it's like a less sexual
incredible hulk?
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143. hmm?
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144. That's not a tree.
That's a monster.
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145. This is amazing.
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146. We're watching
a hawk & chick with hawk!
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147. I know, and he
must be excited
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148. 'cause he's watching
it with us.
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149. Or not.
He's crying.
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150. Oh.
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151. Everything okay, kojima?
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152. No. Not okay.
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153. The reason I'm in your town
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154. Is to find my yuki.
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155. Is that japanese
for getting your groove back?
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156. No. It is english for getting
my daughter back.
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157. Yuki? Your daughter
lives here?
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158. Yes, she does.
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159. I haven't gathered
the courage to speak to her.
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160. I haven't spoken
to yuki in 30 years.
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161. hawk and chick haven't
spoken in 30 years?
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162. What the hell?
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163. She chose to move to america
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164. With her mother
after we divorced.
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165. Our relationship was strained
because I strained it.
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166. Now yuki is... An accountant.
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167. What?
Oh, nice.
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168. I've come all this way,
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169. But I worry yuki
doesn't want to see me.
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170. Eh, what's 30 years?
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171. I got underwear
older than that.
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172. You two will be sword-fighting
together in no time.
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173. We've got to make
this samur-ight!
Whoa!
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174. I've got a great idea
you're all gonna hate.
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175. Family conference.
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176. Don't worry.
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177. Doesn't seem rude.
No, no.
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178. Maybe all we need
to do is get yuki
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179. To see her dad as hawk again.
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180. Up on the big screen!
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181. Okay, but how
do we do that?
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182. I'm really enjoying
this huddle.
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183. One of the best
huddles ever.
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184. It's all right.
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185. Guys, this is the part
you're gonna hate.
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186. We got to put on
a hawk & chick film festival
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187. And convince them both to go.
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188. Reunion! Boom!
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189. You hate it, you hate it.
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190. I don't hate it.
I like it.
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191. I love it.
I love it, too.
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192. Oh! You snuck
in the huddle!
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193. I am out of ketchup.
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194. But I am in for
the festival!
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195. So, you want me to let you guys
take over the theater
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196. For the entire weekend
for a marathon
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197. Of some obscure samurai movies
from the '70s.
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198. Is that right?
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199. Yup. So we're good here?
Not gonna happen.
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200. But the stars of the movies
are gonna be there.
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201. Most likely.
Well, one is for sure.
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202. Point is they're gonna reunite
in front of all their fans!
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203. Father and daughter
together again...
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204. What-what are you doing?
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205. Oh, this? Nothing.
Keep talking.
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206. Can you still hear me?
It's a little crack now.
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207. I'm just gonna close
this down, and bye!
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208. Great. Thank you.
Thank you!
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209. Come on, louise.
Let's go.
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210. Psst. Hey.
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211. Me. I'm talking.
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212. Is shinji kojima
really in town?
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213. And yuki?
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214. Yeah! Wait, so you know
the hawk & chick movies?
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215. I love them!
Lots of people do.
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216. If you did a hawk &
chick film festival,
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217. People would
definitely show up.
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218. So, can you talk your boss
into letting us
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219. Use this theater?
No.
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220. We've had bad experiences
doing film festivals.
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221. We had a meg ryan film festival,
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222. And this place was
disgusting afterwards.
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223. Oh, well, we tried.
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224. Thanks.
Wait, wait, wait.
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225. You can do the festival here.
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226. We just got to be sneaky.
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227. Like a coyote.
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228. Oh, I like the sound of this.
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229. Listen, the last show
on Saturday night
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230. Lets out at 11:00.
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231. Once my manager drives off,
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232. The theater's ours.
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233. It'll be a secret,
one night only,
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234. Midnight screening
of a hawk & chick movie.
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235. Okay, we'll do it.
Yes!
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236. Thanks, dominic.
You're all right.
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237. So which hawk & chick movies
do you have prints of?
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238. "prints"?
Yeah, you know, a print?
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239. Thing that goes
in the projector?
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240. Makes pictures
on the screen?
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241. Oh, we don't have one of those.
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242. No, we just thought
we could bring our vhs tapes
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243. And just fast-forward
through the commerci...
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244. Okay, I realize
how terrible that sounds.
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245. Hmm, maybe I can find one.
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246. All right, you know, I'll poke
around on some film forums.
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247. You're lucky I was planning
to go online today.
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248. Ooh, exciting!
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249. An illegal samurai
film festival!
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250. I like all those words!
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251. Now all we need is a movie.
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252. And we got to convince yuki
to want to reunite
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253. With her father,
who she might hate.
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254. And we need flyers!
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255. But how do we advertise
a secret film screening?
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256. Psst. You like movies?
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257. Yeah, I like movies.
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258. Are you cool?
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259. What do you mean?
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260. Forget it!
Keep moving.
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261. How's it going?
Some of these people seem cool,
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262. But they're not!
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263. How can you tell?
You can tell.
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264. So, uh, trash can?
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265. No. I think we owe it
to an old japanese man
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266. And his middle-aged daughter
to see this through.
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267. Wow, that just got me.
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268. Let's try the quad
at the community college.
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269. There's two things
those honkys love—
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270. Foreign films and
flyers telling them
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271. Where other
honkys will be!
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272. Well, this is the address
kojima gave us.
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273. That's her! That's chick!
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274. It's so gross to see her
behind a desk.
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275. She should be slicing up
the snow monster
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276. Or the six-headed sumo!
God, idiot!
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277. Please don't call her
an idiot to her face.
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278. Just get it out now.
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279. Idiot! Idiot! Idiot!
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280. All right, let's go get yuki
to say yes to the fest.
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281. No.
What?
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282. Look, I haven't even thought
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283. About those movies in years.
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284. Okay, okay, we're
giving you a chance
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285. To feel like a
movie star again.
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286. You can see yourself up on the
big screen instead of staring
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287. At that number screen
on your desk there.
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288. I'm very happy as an accountant.
No, you're not.
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289. I am.
You're depressed.
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290. No, I'm not.
You didn't let me finish.
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291. "... Ing" me.
Depressing me!
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292. Louise?
I mean, who makes 14
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293. Amazing movies with their dad,
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294. And then just
walks away one day?
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295. Who does that, yuki?
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296. Louise, stop.
Who does that?
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297. Louise.
I'm sure it wasn't easy
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298. Working with your dad
all those years.
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299. I-I know. I get it.
I've been there.
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300. Wrong. Wrong!
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301. Working with your dad is fun.
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302. I mean working
with your dad was fun.
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303. Because he was a samurai
and you killed monsters!
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304. Yuki, um, can we have
a minute, please?
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305. Look, louise,
she obviously doesn't want
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306. To reconnect with her father.
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307. We should call off
the screening.
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308. What? No way! We
need to get her butt
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309. Into that theater so she
can apologize to koji.
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310. I think it's more
like kojima needs
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311. To apologize to yuki
for driving her away.
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312. Yuki didn't want
his life, louise!
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313. So we're in agreement.
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314. We're not gonna tell
her that her dad's here.
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315. Wait. What?
We're gonna trick her.
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316. We are?
Shh, shh, shh!
Here she comes.
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317. So, about that film festival—
can we put you down as a "yes"?
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318. I'm not so sure.
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319. Yuki, yuki, come on, yuke.
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320. Just say yes.
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321. Imagine a packed theater
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322. Of your adoring fans
all there for you!
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323. Just you, no hawk.
It'll be chick's night.
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324. We love you, yuki! Ah! Ah!
What is...?
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325. She's doing a...
Like, a lot of people cheering,
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326. But it sounds more
like a ghost.
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327. Uh, it's okay, I got it.
I guess that could be fun.
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328. All right, what
the hell. I'll go.
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329. Great!
Great!
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330. So you got her to come?
Yup.
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331. That's great.
Mm-hmm.
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332. Did you use my icebreaker?
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333. Pretend to rob the place?
No.
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334. Did you file for an
extension on your taxes?
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335. No, tina. That's a myth.
You can't do that.
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336. Well, how does yuki feel
about seeing her father?
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337. We might not have told her
that her dad was gonna be there.
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338. On purpose by accident.
What?
Yup.
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339. Nice. You tricked her!
Yup.
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340. I'm not sure you can trick
people into reuniting.
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341. Not true. That's how they got
mel gibson and danny glover
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342. Back together
for lethal weapon 3.
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343. Yeah, I read that.
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344. This is gonna work, people.
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345. Yuki's gonna see hawk & chick
up on the big screen,
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346. Get all weepy like koji did, and
realize how crazy she's been,
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347. And we're gonna be heroes,
and we're gonna be invited
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348. To the premiere
of their next movie in japan!
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349. Ooh, I got
to get a passport.
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350. Guess who got
the print. Me!
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351. I freaking love this guy!
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352. Dominic! Ah, come here.
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353. Which one is it?
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354. Hawk & chick
versus seaweed monster.
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355. Ooh, seaweed
monster, scary!
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356. Only thing—
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357. It's an original 35
millimeter print from japan.
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358. That's incredible.
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359. No, I mean,
original, vintage.
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360. It's not dubbed
in english.
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361. It's not even
subtitled.
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362. Oh.
Yeah.
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363. Well, so, can't you just whip up
some english subtitles?
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364. Oh, sure. Yeah, I'll just add
some words to the screen.
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365. What do you think
this is, future world?
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366. I have an idea...
Not about this.
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367. Okay, wait. No, I got
one about this, too.
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368. I have, like,
six ideas.
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369. The third one's
about this.
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370. Dubbing it ourselves?
Great idea.
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371. Thanks, gene. Guys.
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372. All right, I typed up
all the subtitles
Copy !req
373. From hawk & chick
versus seaweed monster.
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374. Did you guys know
about spell check?
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375. It's amazing.
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376. It tells you
if you misspell something.
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377. I mean, it's... Some of it
is open to interpretation.
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378. But, you know,
it's helpful.
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379. Here's everyone's parts.
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380. How many characters
are you playing?
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381. Three.
Ah, three's good.
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382. I'm doing four characters,
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383. But I guess, you know,
I'm more experienced.
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384. But I've got a lot of lines
because I'm the mayor.
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385. You're the mayor?
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386. Tina, tina,
let me be the mayor.
Back off.
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387. Let's dub, people!
Rub a dub dub!
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388. It has been many days since
we have loaned you our lantern.
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389. Can we have it back now?
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390. With less lantern oil
than when I lent it to you.
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391. Also, the wick is
in need of replacement.
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392. Lot of lantern talk.
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393. There's always a lot
of lantern talk.
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394. You get into it.
Already there.
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395. Mom, back off.
Seriously.
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396. All right, don't forget,
secret screening,
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397. So we cannot look
like a line!
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398. The manager's gonna come out
pretty soon and go home.
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399. We're just
40-some-odd people
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400. Who happen to be
standing here.
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401. So, look at your phones
or up at the sky
Copy !req
402. And whistle or something.
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403. Oh. Okay.
Like this?
Great.
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404. Wait, wait.
Too many shoe tie-ers,
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405. One of you hail a cab.
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406. Taxi!
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407. What do I do?
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408. Commit, commit, get in,
circle the block.
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409. Hello.
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410. Right this way, talent.
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411. I can't believe
I agreed to this.
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412. Are those
from my rose bush?
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413. Shh, shh. Tonight,
you're a celebrity again.
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414. You don't have a
worry in the world.
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415. Well, I'm worried
about my roses.
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416. They're fine. They're fine.
They're resilient!
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417. Hi, yuki!
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418. Belcher family limo
at your service!
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419. You'll notice a bottle
of water on your seat.
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420. That's for you, because
celebrities gets thirstier
Copy !req
421. Than normal people.
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422. The cheese sticks
hidden in the seat—
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423. Uh, those are
not for you.
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424. I will now put up
the privacy divider
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425. For the remainder
of your ride.
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426. Okay, he's gone.
Get 'em in! Get 'em in!
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427. Oh, crap, they're early!
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428. Aw, crap, we're early!
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429. They can't see
each other yet!
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430. I know! First yuki's
got to watch the movie,
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431. Feel bad and want to
repair their relationship!
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432. I know!
Our perfect plan!
Flawless!
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433. We got to get him inside!
Koji, come on.
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434. But I am giving
kevin an autograph.
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435. Ugh. Forget kevin.
Inside, now, let's go!
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436. Gene! Privacy screen!
Get in there!
Ah!
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437. Aah! Ow! Aah!
You need privacy!
Be private!
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438. We got to move!
Let's move!
Ow, you hit me.
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439. That was... Kevin.
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440. Kevin, get away!
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441. Get away, kevin!
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442. Ah, you got me away!
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443. Watch out
for the...
Ugh! Ow!
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444. Okay, privacy's over.
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445. You had some you time.
Thanks.
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446. Okay, we'll come and get you
when it's about to start!
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447. Wait. Why can't I go in now?
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448. Yeah, just relax
and enjoy the green room.
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449. Sorry it's not
actually green, or a room.
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450. You may have one cheese stick.
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451. Okay, just sit here
and be quiet.
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452. And keep the jacket
on your head
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453. Till the movie starts.
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454. It's very cold in here.
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455. Okay. Got it.
No problem.
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456. Enjoy the
movie, lady.
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457. You're in it. And
here's some tissues.
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458. They're good for when something
life-changing happens.
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459. All right, here we go.
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460. It was a time in japan
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461. When evil monsters would attack
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462. Nice little villages
for no good reason.
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463. And the only force in all
of japan who could stop them—
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464. Hawk & chick!
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465. Bob
There's a village up ahead.
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466. Maybe there's hair
that needs cutting.
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467. And hopefully, no monsters
that need defeating.
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468. This is amazing!
I know!
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469. We're incredible.
We really are.
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470. Oh, no, seaweed monster!
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471. You're ruining my haircut,
and I'm the mayor!
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472. Aah...!
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473. Aah!
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474. Seaweed monster, let me go!
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475. So, you loving the movie?
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476. No. Not really.
It's kind of painful.
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477. Uh-huh. You want
some popcorn?
Sure.
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478. It is finally dead.
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479. Father! It's not all dead!
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480. Part of it
still wishes to fight.
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481. That's not how I sound.
Is that how I sound?
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482. No! Oh, god, I think
the batteries are dying!
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483. But we put new batteries
in this morning!
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484. How could this happen?
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485. Fast-forward. Rewind.
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486. Fast-forward. Rewind.
Fast-forward. Rewind.
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487. Well, it's not that bad.
Maybe no one will notice.
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488. Let's send this thing
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489. Back to the...
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490. Okay, that's really bad.
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491. We got to do something!
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492. There's a mic.
I think we got to wing it.
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493. Good thing we've seen this movie
a thousand times.
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494. Aah! Aah! No longer will you
terrorize this town,
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495. Seaweed monster.
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496. We are going to weed you out!
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497. Crap, we need
the villagers!
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498. Lin! Lin! Psst!
We need you guys up here.
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499. What?
Come here! Hurry!
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500. Which way did
the seaweed monster go?
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501. That way!
No, that way!
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502. Aah! Monster! Green!
Green! Aah! Aah!
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503. I can't do this.
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504. Oh, god, she's leaving!
Yuki's leaving!
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505. Oh, I forgot to tell you,
your plan's not working.
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506. She's having a terrible
time. She told me.
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507. I thought the popcorn would
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508. Make her feel better,
but it didn't.
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509. Hang on, it's my line.
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510. Don't hurt me.
I'm the mayor.
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511. Don't hurt me.
I'm the mayor.
Mom!
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512. Damn it, yuki,
you're killing me!
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513. What do we do?
What do we do?
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514. Wait.
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515. Yuki, don't go!
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516. Huh?
I mean, chick.
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517. I know we're fighting this
seaweed monster right now,
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518. But I want you to know how
much I love and support you,
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519. Even if you decide...
Hold on. Hiya!
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520. Aah!
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521. To stop fighting monsters
with me someday
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522. And do taxes instead.
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523. And, hawk, I want you to know—
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524. Hiya!-- If that ever happens,
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525. It's me who should apologize
for leaving!
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526. 'cause I would be
dumb to do that.
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527. I don't remember
this part.
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528. Are the actors really bad?
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529. Yes. They're horrible.
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530. No! Smash this house!
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531. Chick doesn't need to
apologize for anything.
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532. Chick was just a kid.
And I hit this guy!
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533. But... But... How could a
father and daughter not talk
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534. For 30 freaking years?
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535. Whoa.
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536. Seaweed monster
suddenly thinks
Copy !req
537. This might be
about something else.
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538. And I'm squeezing you.
Sorry about that.
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539. Am I gonna turn into someone
completely different someday?
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540. Is that what happens
when you grow up?
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541. You-you grow apart?
Listen,
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542. What happened to hawk and chick
will never happen to us.
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543. This hawk and this chick will
never not talk for 30 years.
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544. You promise?
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545. Yes, of course, louise.
I mean, chick.
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546. Foreign films are so much more
complex than hollywood movies.
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547. I'm the monster again.
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548. Aah, I'm getting stabbed.
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549. I'm getting... I exploded.
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550. I'm not sure why I... I explo...
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551. I'm dead. I'm gone.
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552. Koji, talk to her.
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553. To who?
To yuki.
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554. My yuki.
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555. Yuki, it's... It's your
father speaking.
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556. Dad? What are you doing here?
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557. You said he wasn't
gonna be here.
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558. You tricked me.
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559. Uh, surprise.
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560. Yuki, please. I've come all
this way to tell you I miss you.
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561. I am sorry for
everything.
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562. I have not been
a good father.
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563. Oh, she's thinking
about it.
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564. I love you, little chick.
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565. Oh, dad.
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566. Oh, he got her.
He got her.
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567. We did it. We did it.
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568. Wow, that
ended up working
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569. Way better than
I thought it would.
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570. Eh, it went about exactly
the way I thought it would.
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571. So I should get
you kids home, right?
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572. What time is it?
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573. It's after midnight.
Is it a school night?
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574. Yes, and I have a
big test tomorrow.
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575. It's, like,
half my grade.
Oh, sorry.
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576. Captioned by
media access group at wgbh
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577. Hastings classics
proudly presents:
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578. The hawk & chick
collector's box set.
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579. All 14 films,
featuring the most celebrated
Copy !req
580. Father-daughter
traveling barber samurais
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581. In the history
of japanese cinema.
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582. All their epic battles have been
digitally remastered.
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583. The toughest job for hawk
wasn't cutting hair
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584. Or defeating
a jellyfish monster.
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585. It was raising a daughter
by himself.
Copy !req
586. Order today.
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587. Take the hawk & chick box set
home to your village.
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