1. - As Victor pulled his
gnarled, bloody stumps
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2. out of his shoes, he
realized the shoe snake
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3. had claimed another victim.
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4. S-S-S-Snake-s-s-s-s.
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5. - This freaky fettuccine
site is scary,
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6. which I'm like totally
down for, by the way.
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7. But all these stories
are fake, right?
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8. - No, that's the best part.
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9. Zeke told me all
of them are real.
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10. Oh knuckle rappers, Gene's
here, later alligator.
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11. - See ya Regina.
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12. My sweet raven of the night.
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13. Huh, Clovis La Roche?
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14. In 1926 New Orleans,
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15. Clovis Clemens was accused
of over 50 counts of murder.
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16. He'd snatch
neighborhood children
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17. and feed them to
his bloodthirsty
alligator, La Roche.
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18. - Clovis
would play his accordion
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19. to mask the screams of the
kids being eaten alive.
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20. Until one night, he waded
into the swamp himself
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21. and fused with La Roche
creating Clovis La Roche.
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22. After he gets ya, and he
will, he'll suck your soul
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23. into the reeds of
his squeeze box.
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24. And you'll be another note
in his symphony of screams.
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25. Also, he'll take your fingers
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26. and put them in a bindle
slung over his shoulder.
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27. And also, he'll take your hat!
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28. - Son, your Papa Roach
cooked you some breakfast.
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29. - 10 fingers, 10 toes,
10 fingers, 10 toes.
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30. - What's got my child riled?
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31. - Oh Dad, it's Clovis La Roche.
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32. He's gonna get me.
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33. - Grover the Coach?
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34. - Clovis La Roche!
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35. The child eating gator
man from Louisiana.
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36. If I hear the wheeze
of his squeeze box,
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37. he'll gobble me up.
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38. I'll be a swamp snack
in his swamp shack.
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39. - Whoa, scary, good thing
he only eats kids like you.
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40. - F you old man.
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41. You think that's it?
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42. After he eats me, he's
gonna put my cut off fingers
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43. in his bindle.
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44. - Mm the finger bindle.
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45. Seems like a hat on a hat.
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46. - Oh, I haven't even
gotten to the hat part yet.
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47. After your dead,
he takes your hat.
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48. - Okay, that's just dumb.
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49. Besides, if this bogus
cologne guy did come here
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50. why wouldn't you
just choke him out?
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51. - Choke him out?
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52. I'm 90% body fat.
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53. If all you're gonna do
is make me feel bad,
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54. then you can just leave.
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55. 10 fingers, 10 toes,
10 fingers, 10 toes.
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56. 10 fingers, 10 toes,
10 fingers, 10 toes.
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57. - The real problem is
Son thinks he's too weak
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58. to keep this Boris McToast
fella from murdering him.
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59. - Well, at his age fears
can seem insurmountable.
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60. I, for example, used to be
terrified of tight spaces
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61. and being buried alive by a
band of psychotic hillbillies.
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62. - Ty Barry you ought leave
your gorgeous face exposed.
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63. - One summer, my kid sister Greg
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64. taped a bankers box over my head
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65. and forced me to lay in a
sprinkler trench for a week.
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66. - Sweet Christ,
that's a grim image.
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67. - Maybe if you present
this Clover the Ghost guy
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68. to your son in a
friendly manner,
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69. he'll extinguish the
associative fear he has,
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70. and provide him with what we
call emotional power over it.
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71. - Your brain is almost as
impressive as your cheekbones.
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72. - By the way, thanks again for
helping me out with the AC.
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73. I really owe you one bud.
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74. - Hmm.
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75. - Blark, I think the time
we've spent crafting this
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76. outweighs the monetary
value of fixing my AC.
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77. - Shh, you're beautiful.
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78. - Oh, this head mask
is pretty tight.
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79. - Just stick to the
script I wrote Stace.
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80. My name's Clovis
and I'm full now.
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81. Me and all the dead
kids in my accordion
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82. think you're a cool guy.
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83. Hang on, I'll be right back.
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84. - I'm wrestling.
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85. - Son, I've got a very
dope surprise for you
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86. in the living room.
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87. - No, no more living rooms.
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88. This is my home now.
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89. I'm gonna stay in
here and push my lane
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90. as my favorite champion
Tryndamere the Barbarian King.
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91. - Tryndamere, huh?
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92. - Yup.
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93. - You think Tryndamere
would be scared of Clovis?
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94. - Pfft, with one swing
of his 10 foot sword,
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95. Tryndamere would turn
Clovis into a hot smear.
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96. Plus, he can
activate undying rage
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97. and become temporarily immortal.
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98. - Well for now I'm safe
and sound above the ground.
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99. I'm safe and sound
above the ground,
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100. safe and sound above the ground,
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101. safe and sound above the
ground, safe and sound.
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102. - Whew whee, this
one's still alive.
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103. - Good catch Clem.
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104. Make sure you bury him
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105. alive or dead.
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106. - Dad, what are you doing?
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107. - I'm giving you the
power of Tryingdammer.
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108. - His name is Tryndamere,
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109. and he isn't real.
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110. - But you're real.
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111. And without you, all
those little blue dudes
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112. would beat Tryndamere with
their magic baseball bats.
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113. - Crystal wands, but I
get what you're saying.
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114. - Oh God,
what's happening?
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115. - I'm saying, he only
does what you let him.
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116. You cast every spell,
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117. and you've killed every
baseball player sent his way.
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118. You are Tryndamere, Son.
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119. - Pick me up.
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120. I'm still alive.
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121. - Uh oh,
Stacey, not now.
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122. - Screw you La
Roche, undying rage!
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123. - Here it comes.
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124. Holy shh, Son you got
a mean right hook.
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125. Just like your Pappy.
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126. - Thanks Dad, I
hope Stacey's okay.
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127. - He's more than okay.
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128. I bought 12 of his books to
use as kindling for the winter.
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129. A small price to pay to
see you conquer your fear
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130. of Corbin the Musical Gator.
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131. Why are your shoes
filled with newspaper?
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132. - Shoe snakes Dad, shoe snakes.
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133. - Shoe snakes, oh?
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134. Shoe snakes?
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135. - I already stuffed
your shoes Dad.
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136. - Oh, good, good.
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137. All right, love you Son.
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138. - Sweet.
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