1. LANDLINE RINGSCopy !req
2. Hello.Copy !req
3. Just tell me what's happened.Copy !req
4. And what is it?Copy !req
5. I'll be right down.Copy !req
6. What's happened?Copy !req
7. Er, Susannah.Copy !req
8. Susannah?Copy !req
9. Princess Susannah.Copy !req
10. Is she all right?Copy !req
11. Don't know.Copy !req
12. (ON TV) 'Don't kill me.Copy !req
13. 'Please don't kill me.'Copy !req
14. (DISTORTED MALE VOICE)
'Read the statement.Copy !req
15. 'Yes. All right.Copy !req
16. 'On this screen?Copy !req
17. 'That is correct.Copy !req
18. I'm SusannahCopy !req
19. 'Duchess of Beaumont.Copy !req
20. 'Popularly known as
Princess Susannah.Copy !req
21. 'I am in a place you... er...Copy !req
22. 'cannot find,
held by one you will not trace.Copy !req
23. 'Prime Minister Michael Callow...Copy !req
24. (CRYING) 'Prime Minister
Michael Callow my life...Copy !req
25. '..my life depends on you.Copy !req
26. 'If you do not do precisely
as instructed by, um...Copy !req
27. 'by 4pm this afternoon,
I will be...Copy !req
28. '(SOBS)Copy !req
29. '..I will be executed.Copy !req
30. 'Please.'Copy !req
31. What are you doing? Keep it going.Copy !req
32. Prime Minister, at this point,
I think it's important to sayCopy !req
33. that we are 100% certainCopy !req
34. that this is, indeed,Copy !req
35. Princess Susannah.Copy !req
36. Her car was intercepted
shortly after midnight,Copy !req
37. returning from the wedding
of a college friend.Copy !req
38. She'd insisted on going.Copy !req
39. But you had security on her?Copy !req
40. Two PPOs, still unconscious.Copy !req
41. Heavy sedative, close range,
each with a single puncture wound.Copy !req
42. No sign of struggle.Copy !req
43. What do they want? Money?Copy !req
44. Release the Jihadi?Copy !req
45. Scrap Third World debt?Copy !req
46. Save the fucking libraries?Copy !req
47. We are convinced both the video and
the demand it contains are genuine.Copy !req
48. What demand?Copy !req
49. What Susannah says next...Copy !req
50. It concerns you directly, sir.Copy !req
51. Just play it.Copy !req
52. 'There is only one demand,
and it is a simple one.Copy !req
53. 'At 4pm this afternoon,Copy !req
54. 'Prime Minister Michael Callow must
appear on live British televisionCopy !req
55. 'on all networks,
terrestrial and satellite,Copy !req
56. 'and... No!Copy !req
57. '(SOBS)Copy !req
58. 'On all British networks,
terrestrial and satellite,Copy !req
59. 'and have full unsimulated
sexual intercourse with a pig.Copy !req
60. '(SOBBING) I don't understand!'Copy !req
61. VIDEO STOPPEDCopy !req
62. The video ends with a
series of technicalCopy !req
63. specifications for
the broadcast.Copy !req
64. Why are you doing this?Copy !req
65. Is this joke, right?Copy !req
66. "Ha ha, Mike! Ho ho."Copy !req
67. It's real.Copy !req
68. She said pig.Copy !req
69. Sex with a pig.Copy !req
70. They want me to have sex with a pig?Copy !req
71. Live on televisionCopy !req
72. this afternoon.Copy !req
73. But what... ? Who... ?Copy !req
74. We're checking with embedded operatives,
compiling a list of suspects.Copy !req
75. Meanwhile, the demand has been made.Copy !req
76. There's not long
to formulate our response.Copy !req
77. Well, I'm not fucking a pig!Copy !req
78. Page one, that's not happening.Copy !req
79. Of course.Copy !req
80. Absolutely, sir.Copy !req
81. Well, have we established a dialogue
with this... ?Copy !req
82. We can't. There's no
e-mail address, no code word.Copy !req
83. No channel for negotiation.Copy !req
84. So we focus on finding Susannah.
We get her back.Copy !req
85. However it's done, I don't care.
We stop this now.Copy !req
86. Everyone's working towards this.Copy !req
87. Yes. No. Not everyone. A dedicated
core team. This can't go wide.Copy !req
88. Keep it so far from the press
it's on the other side of Jupiter.Copy !req
89. This only exists in this room.Copy !req
90. It's already outside it.Copy !req
91. If there are hacks sniffing around,
shut them down, bright, red, D Notice.Copy !req
92. Super fucking Godzilla injunction
with ten-inch Whitehall fangs!Copy !req
93. This video came from YouTube.Copy !req
94. What?Copy !req
95. It was uploaded via an encrypted IP
an hour ago.Copy !req
96. Well, get it off there!Copy !req
97. We did after nine minutes, long enough
for it to be duplicated and spread.Copy !req
98. Spread?
How many people have seen this?Copy !req
99. We take down one,
six clones pop up elsewhere.Copy !req
100. How many people?Copy !req
101. 50,000. That's our current estimate.Copy !req
102. The news rooms have got it.Copy !req
103. They're running this on air?Copy !req
104. No. We put a type five D notice out
and they're complying.Copy !req
105. For now.Copy !req
106. It's trending on Twitter.Copy !req
107. Oh! For... Fucking internet!Copy !req
108. What now? What's the play book?Copy !req
109. This is virgin territory,
Prime Minister.Copy !req
110. There's no play book.Copy !req
111. Princess Susannah's been kidnapped!Copy !req
112. You scared the shit out of me!Copy !req
113. There's a youtube of it!Copy !req
114. Go to work!Copy !req
115. And satellite,Copy !req
116. '.. And have full unsimulated
sexual intercourse with a pig.'Copy !req
117. No way. It's a piss take, man.
Look at it!Copy !req
118. 'I don't understand!'Copy !req
119. Why this is on the news?Copy !req
120. '.. Carlton Bloom's
controversial exhibitionCopy !req
121. 'closes three weeks
ahead of schedule... 'Copy !req
122. How do we describe it?
"An indecent act"?Copy !req
123. Everyone's seen the video.
They know the details.Copy !req
124. If we mention bestiality
Ofcom would be pissed off.Copy !req
125. Fuck Ofcom!Copy !req
126. We're observing the D Notice.Copy !req
127. Surely we're going to do something.Copy !req
128. We are honouring the D Notice.Copy !req
129. The voluntary D Notice!Copy !req
130. It may be a sportsman-like
gesture but we are making it.Copy !req
131. A woman's life is at stake!Copy !req
132. We follow the procedure.Copy !req
133. My timeline consists
of 100% viewers askingCopy !req
134. why we're not covering it.
How do I reply?Copy !req
135. You don't.Copy !req
136. That is totally backwards.Copy !req
137. No-one else has broken rank.Copy !req
138. Not the Beeb, not Sky, not...Copy !req
139. Facebook's coverage
is pretty comprehensive!Copy !req
140. MaybeCopy !req
141. It's like 9/11's happening andCopy !req
142. we're broadcasting sandwich recipes.Copy !req
143. We're not a chat room!Copy !req
144. It's on CNN and Fox.Copy !req
145. And MSNBC, Al Jazeera, NHK...Copy !req
146. All right.Copy !req
147. Oh, God! This planet!Copy !req
148. OK, Sarah, cover the snatch itself.Copy !req
149. Damon, public reaction. Meera,Copy !req
150. the royal angle, upcoming marriage,
etc.Copy !req
151. Simon, set tone with
Standards and Practices.Copy !req
152. We need to explain this without
viewers sicking up their Weetabix.Copy !req
153. Ken, the internet aspect, new paradigm,
Twitter, Arab spring, all that.Copy !req
154. Dan, all graphics run past me.
Keep it functional... no Peppa Pigs.Copy !req
155. Malaika,
update the princess obit VT.Copy !req
156. The Obit VT?Copy !req
157. Mm-hm. First, an awkward phone call.
Least I can do is warn Tom.Copy !req
158. We put a D Notice on it.Copy !req
159. 'It's gone global, Tom.'Copy !req
160. Don't. I'm begging you.Copy !req
161. Don't run it, Martin.Copy !req
162. 'Look, I'm sorry. I can't help you.'Copy !req
163. You know how much help
you're getting hereon in?Copy !req
164. Multiply nothing by shit-all!
UKN are dead for us!Copy !req
165. Shove it up your arse you fucking...Copy !req
166. Interesting.Copy !req
167. A man.Copy !req
168. Man?Copy !req
169. A man!Copy !req
170. Tom, so you're across it...Copy !req
171. I'm exploring contingency plans.Copy !req
172. 'I briefed Callett.'Copy !req
173. Ah! Mr Callett.
Noel, from Blue Eye.Copy !req
174. Noel won an Emmy by his effects
work on that HBO moon Western thing.Copy !req
175. Sea Of Tranquillity.Copy !req
176. You won't find better.Copy !req
177. Can you map a head onto a body live?Copy !req
178. Depends if your camera's moving.Copy !req
179. Rule sheet specifies a single hand-held
camera in a constant roving motion.Copy !req
180. Mm.Copy !req
181. Yeah, Gonzo style.
He knows his shit. That's tough.Copy !req
182. "Fruition to be transmitted
in full"?Copy !req
183. Focus on the visuals. Different face
mapped onto a live performer.Copy !req
184. According to those stipulations.Copy !req
185. Fringes of possibility...Copy !req
186. Deadline's at four. We need to know
if it's workable by two.Copy !req
187. Can't happen.Copy !req
188. It has to.Copy !req
189. Our embeds have ruled out the major
players. It's not AQ, not IRA.Copy !req
190. This is what's left...
radicals, hate groups.Copy !req
191. People who've threatened yourself
or the royals.Copy !req
192. They're being pulled in as we speak.Copy !req
193. For more than questioning, I hope.Copy !req
194. Somebody know something.Copy !req
195. 'If we all do it more, there'll be
less waste lying around... 'Copy !req
196. Is it still not on the telly?Copy !req
197. Nothing. Must be a hoax.Copy !req
198. Or a black-out. Oh! Heads up!Copy !req
199. 'Some major breaking news
here on UKN.Copy !req
200. In the last two minutesCopy !req
201. 'It's been confirmed
that Susannah, Duchess of BeaumontCopy !req
202. 'has been kidnapped.Copy !req
203. 'A video uploaded
anonymously to the InternetCopy !req
204. 'appears to depict the princess
pleading for her life.Copy !req
205. 'The video also contains a bizarre
ransom demand of a personal natureCopy !req
206. 'involving the Prime Minister,
and a detailed list of instructionsCopy !req
207. 'relating to the enactment
of this demand.Copy !req
208. 'As police round up
potential suspects... 'Copy !req
209. '... across the nation.Copy !req
210. '.. This viewer video shows officers
raiding an address in Bradford.Copy !req
211. 'A man thought to be
connected with a religiousCopy !req
212. pressure group, dragged
to a waiting van... 'Copy !req
213. If it's terrorists,
they'll take her head off.Copy !req
214. For fuck's sake, man!
Just saying.Copy !req
215. They'll be asking for
a million quid or something.Copy !req
216. They want him to do it with a pig.Copy !req
217. Demands...Copy !req
218. Telegraph has the whole video and an
interactive timeline. Tonally stark.Copy !req
219. Brief mention of the ransom being
"a sex act". Nothing too gross.Copy !req
220. Sun runs with "Taken".
Big grab of Susannah...Copy !req
221. Of course I still want that drink.Copy !req
222. Then give me something.Copy !req
223. It's not...Copy !req
224. That won't be possible.Copy !req
225. I'm friendly when I drink.
Very friendly when I'm grateful.Copy !req
226. There's no comment at this timeCopy !req
227. The Guardian are running
a fucking live blogCopy !req
228. and a short piece on
the historical symbolism of the pig.Copy !req
229. '.. only five hours away,Copy !req
230. 'UKN's Damon Brown analyses
the public reaction to the crisis.'Copy !req
231. 'It's a day like no other.Copy !req
232. 'The kidnap video has been watched
by over 18 million people.Copy !req
233. 'Social networking sites are a... buzz
with 10,000 Tweets per minute.Copy !req
234. 'While we wait for
Downing Street to respond,Copy !req
235. 'the nation is voicing its opinion.Copy !req
236. 'I don't think anyone should concede
to any humiliation under threat.Copy !req
237. 'I couldn't bear to watch that.Copy !req
238. 'I won't be tuning in.
Just thinking about it is horrible.Copy !req
239. 'That's disgusting.
It is disgusting.Copy !req
240. 'It is disgusting but...
after that, he's gonna be hero.Copy !req
241. 'People will look at him like he's
insane and take his position away.Copy !req
242. 'It will be hilarious to see that on TV.Copy !req
243. 'Nothing too abnormal for MPs.Copy !req
244. 'They're all sexual deviants,
all MPs and Prime Ministers.'Copy !req
245. We've been squeezing hard,
but nothing concrete.Copy !req
246. It's my house! You can't...Copy !req
247. You are in my doorway
touching my door handle!Copy !req
248. Could I have a word?Copy !req
249. It won't come to that.Copy !req
250. And if they don't find her?Copy !req
251. MI5 have got a name.Copy !req
252. They're surrounding the place now.Copy !req
253. Where?Copy !req
254. What?Copy !req
255. Where's the place?Copy !req
256. Truro.Copy !req
257. - Why are you lying?
- What?Copy !req
258. You're lying!Copy !req
259. Truro? Jesus!Copy !req
260. I don't want you worrying.Copy !req
261. You've never patronised me.
Don't start now.Copy !req
262. Whoever this is, is insane.Copy !req
263. And has a princess.Copy !req
264. We'll get through this.Copy !req
265. Not any princess... the princess.Copy !req
266. Princess bloody Facebook bloody
eco-conscious national sweetheart.Copy !req
267. I won't have to do anything.Copy !req
268. Everyone's laughing at us.Copy !req
269. You don't know that.Copy !req
270. I know people.Copy !req
271. We love humiliation.Copy !req
272. I can not laughCopy !req
273. Nothing is going to happen.Copy !req
274. It's already happening
in their heads.Copy !req
275. In their heads, that's what you're
doing, what my husband is doing.Copy !req
276. Please!Copy !req
277. Jane.Copy !req
278. I love you.Copy !req
279. What?Copy !req
280. Palace on the phone, sir.Copy !req
281. Get Alex to stall them.Copy !req
282. She's already been speaking to her
for ten minutes.Copy !req
283. "Her"?Copy !req
284. It's the Queen herself.Copy !req
285. Go on.Copy !req
286. 'As the 4pm deadline draws nearer,
the world holds its breath... 'Copy !req
287. waiting to discover where the princessCopy !req
288. Would they use a female pig?Copy !req
289. It's on the list.Copy !req
290. List of rules,
specifies camera angles and things.Copy !req
291. Like dogme 95.Copy !req
292. It's not like Dogme 95.Copy !req
293. Exactly that.Copy !req
294. What's Dogme 95?Copy !req
295. Cinematic movement.Copy !req
296. Lars von Trier.Copy !req
297. Oh...Copy !req
298. Rules for a director...
no background music,Copy !req
299. only natural light,
for authenticity.Copy !req
300. Same as these, so they can't cheat,
cut another guy's arse pumping away.Copy !req
301. 'I can't think of anything
remotely like this.Copy !req
302. 'A new form of terrorism...Copy !req
303. It's not Islamist. To request
a pig is specifically abhorrent.Copy !req
304. 'That's the point!
Make love to a pig!'Copy !req
305. Make love?Copy !req
306. Steer them away
from the grisly details.Copy !req
307. 'Let's not dwell
on any of the details.Copy !req
308. 'This is already
a huge national talking point.Copy !req
309. 'Isn't this precisely what whoever
is behind this is looking for?'Copy !req
310. How's Her Majesty taking it?Copy !req
311. "I trust you'll do everything
in your power to get her back."Copy !req
312. And we are.Copy !req
313. It wasn't a collective "you".
It was a singular "you", ie me.Copy !req
314. Sir, we may have something. Jamie's
been tracing the video's origin.Copy !req
315. I thought it was untraceable.Copy !req
316. Technically, yes, so I thought,
"Work with what we do now"Copy !req
317. That video, before Youtube
compression it was 57.3 meg.Copy !req
318. Algorithm.Copy !req
319. Anyway, we also know
it was uploaded at 3:16 AM.Copy !req
320. I ran a nationwide traceback
on uninterrupted one-way uploadsCopy !req
321. of precisely 57.3 meg
in the minutes leading up to 3:16,Copy !req
322. and the closest I can get
is a postcode.Copy !req
323. It came from somewhere in there.Copy !req
324. Looks like a campus.Copy !req
325. Yeah. Closed 2010.Copy !req
326. It's been empty since.Copy !req
327. Latest I-sat image on this area?Copy !req
328. 3 AM flyover shot from last night...Copy !req
329. Looks like it had lights on.Copy !req
330. We got him. We got him.Copy !req
331. Alert the local team.
Full squad. I'll man it.Copy !req
332. With helmet-cam relay.
We can watch the operation.Copy !req
333. Press office, OK, Tom?Copy !req
334. Yes!Copy !req
335. Right. Confident?Copy !req
336. It's a kick-bollock scramble,
but with finessing it should be OK.Copy !req
337. Finesse quickly.
Our performer's on his way.Copy !req
338. CAR STOPSCopy !req
339. It's a new one for me, obviously.
I wouldn't normally... You know.Copy !req
340. You seen any of my films?Copy !req
341. No.Copy !req
342. I'm pretty trad... bish, bash, bosh.
In, out.Copy !req
343. Yeah, well...Copy !req
344. What do I put on the invoice?
That's what I'm wondering.Copy !req
345. There won't be any invoicing.Copy !req
346. - Oi-oi, Rod!
- Oi-oi!Copy !req
347. Need to prep two statementsCopy !req
348. Good outcome. Bad outcome.Copy !req
349. Rescue operation?Copy !req
350. Goon squad's heading
for postcode in Buckinghamshire.Copy !req
351. HP84TD, a college or something.
They should be there by now.Copy !req
352. TEXT MESSAGE ALERTCopy !req
353. UNZIPS/CLOTHES RUSTLECopy !req
354. CAMERA CLICKSCopy !req
355. Yeah, I've reduced
the luminance...Copy !req
356. Agent Callett, this is Mr Flynn.Copy !req
357. AKA, Rod Senseless.Copy !req
358. Stage name.Copy !req
359. Yeah. Well...Copy !req
360. You need to get into this.Copy !req
361. Is there a dressing room I can use?Copy !req
362. No.Copy !req
363. Where's my co-star?Copy !req
364. Be rude not to give her a kiss
beforehand.Copy !req
365. Outside in the truck.Copy !req
366. Full of joie de vivre, isn't he?Copy !req
367. You also need to wear this...
on your head.Copy !req
368. Board's been prised away.
That's where they got in.Copy !req
369. OK.Copy !req
370. 'Target identified.'Copy !req
371. Commissioner. Thank you.Copy !req
372. So, team red...Copy !req
373. 'Any orders, boss?'Copy !req
374. Continue reconnaissance
and await instructions,Copy !req
375. before you proceed.Copy !req
376. 'With the 4pm deadline
three hours away,Copy !req
377. 'time is running out
for the Prime Minister... 'Copy !req
378. They got in, yeah?Copy !req
379. Do you think I'd be here
if they had?Copy !req
380. We've got statements
for either outcome.Copy !req
381. Listen,
coverage is very sympathetic.Copy !req
382. Can't think about coverage now!Copy !req
383. But it's on-side?Copy !req
384. Strong undercurrent of sympathy.Copy !req
385. Every poll indicates
understanding, disgust with theCopy !req
386. captor, outrage at the whole
thing, but not at you.Copy !req
387. If Walker's team fuck up, I'm not
saying they will, but if they do,Copy !req
388. the public anticipates
non-compliance.Copy !req
389. There'll be squawks from the usuals,Copy !req
390. but it's not "England expects".Copy !req
391. If he kills her, there's no blood
on your hands. Bottom line.Copy !req
392. 'With hours to go, time is running
out for the security services.Copy !req
393. 'Joining us is actress Lydia... 'Copy !req
394. Thought this was coming from IB7.Copy !req
395. We trimmed the edges
so it's coming direct.Copy !req
396. Twinkle tits from?Copy !req
397. Actress, Downton Abbey,
knows the princess.Copy !req
398. This came for you,
left at reception.Copy !req
399. Courier dropped it off.Copy !req
400. Know how to plug this in?Copy !req
401. Jack, call the police. Take it!Copy !req
402. Get someone to shoot that first.Copy !req
403. What the fuck is this?Copy !req
404. 'I gave you rules.
'I said no cheating.Copy !req
405. '(SCREAMS)'Copy !req
406. 'Some more breaking news,Copy !req
407. 'and a severed finger, thought
to belong to Princess Susannah,Copy !req
408. 'has been delivered to UKN,
along with a videoCopy !req
409. 'apparently showing the kidnapper
removing it from the princess.Copy !req
410. 'UKN News has passed all material
to Scotland Yard... 'Copy !req
411. Fucking hell!Copy !req
412. Oh, God! I can't watch this!
He's got to do what they want.Copy !req
413. Yes, he fucking has!Copy !req
414. '.. Which contained a statementCopy !req
415. 'accusing Downing Street of
attempting to break the rulesCopy !req
416. 'This grim development comes just hoursCopy !req
417. before the 4PM deadline... 'Copy !req
418. TV OFFCopy !req
419. Jesus!Copy !req
420. Unless I'm mistaken,
our mystery man specifiedCopy !req
421. no visual trickery
in his original demand, didn't he?Copy !req
422. I considered it necessary...Copy !req
423. Considered it necessary.Copy !req
424. To divise...Copy !req
425. FUCKING HELL!Copy !req
426. - Mike... !
- Don't!Copy !req
427. It's nor...Copy !req
428. One word, I swear I will fucking... !Copy !req
429. What did you do, Alex?Copy !req
430. I had a back-up plan.Copy !req
431. A man prepared to do it
and an FX company thatCopy !req
432. would paint your head
onto his shoulders.Copy !req
433. You actually
thought that would work?Copy !req
434. I believed it worth considering.Copy !req
435. Then you're a stupid bitch.Copy !req
436. With your interest at heart.Copy !req
437. Who knew about this?Copy !req
438. A select few.
It seems some idiot at the studioCopy !req
439. recognised our designated performer,Copy !req
440. Tweeted a photo and the online
hivemind did the maths.Copy !req
441. It's not playing well.Copy !req
442. With who?Copy !req
443. With, er... anyone.Copy !req
444. 'A few hours ago, public opinion
was behind Prime Minister Callow,Copy !req
445. 'with only 28%
of the public believingCopy !req
446. 'he should fulfil the bizarre
and illegal request.Copy !req
447. 'In the wake of these images,Copy !req
448. 'and the delivery of the princess's
finger, the mood is shifting.Copy !req
449. 'It'll be humiliating, but nothing
compared to her suffering.Copy !req
450. 'With the appearance of finger...Copy !req
451. 'He's just got to do it.Copy !req
452. Yes, he has to do it.Copy !req
453. 'What's the alternative?Copy !req
454. 'We can get another Prime Minister.
We can't live without a princess.Copy !req
455. Of course...Copy !req
456. 'If he doesn't get her released,
he's finished, isn't he?Copy !req
457. 'Online polls suggest
that 86% of votersCopy !req
458. 'now believe
the demand should be met.Copy !req
459. 'Damon Brown... 'Copy !req
460. When are Walker's team
hitting the college?Copy !req
461. They need time...Copy !req
462. No more pissing around.Copy !req
463. Julian's advising against...Copy !req
464. I'm advising for.
They go in now. They go in now.Copy !req
465. Where's my obit VT?Copy !req
466. What would you say if I said I was
near where Susannah's being held?Copy !req
467. I'd say bullshit.Copy !req
468. Then you'd be wrong.Copy !req
469. Have you got a crew with you?Copy !req
470. I'm not stupid.Copy !req
471. Malaika?Copy !req
472. Hello?Copy !req
473. Are you getting this?Copy !req
474. Yeah. Don't put yourself
in any danger.Copy !req
475. Still getting this?Copy !req
476. Yeah. Just stay safe, Malaika.
Be careful!Copy !req
477. If this doesn't work...Copy !req
478. we need...Copy !req
479. GUN CLICKSCopy !req
480. Armed police! Lay down on the floor!
Lay down on the floor!Copy !req
481. Move!Copy !req
482. Fuck!Copy !req
483. It's a decoy.Copy !req
484. They must have bounced the upload
from here with a proxy. I'm sorry.Copy !req
485. Jesus!Copy !req
486. They're looking right at her!Copy !req
487. They can't see her.Copy !req
488. 'Malaika, make sure they can't... 'Copy !req
489. Stay down! Don't move!Copy !req
490. Run, Malaika! Run!Copy !req
491. Get out of there. Come on!Copy !req
492. Armed police!Copy !req
493. MACHINE GUN FIRECopy !req
494. Is it him?Copy !req
495. Where the fuck is Jack?Copy !req
496. Advance! Advance! Advance!Copy !req
497. Get down!Copy !req
498. Get down!Copy !req
499. UKN. It's Malaika something
or other. She's from UKN.Copy !req
500. You press? Yes.Copy !req
501. GUN CLICKSCopy !req
502. There goes your RTS Award.Copy !req
503. There must be something.Copy !req
504. There's nothing there, Mike.Copy !req
505. There'll be a clue.
Some evidence.Copy !req
506. We've done all we can.Copy !req
507. You rescued mannequin.Copy !req
508. I'm sorry, Michael...Copy !req
509. Fuck off, Julian!Copy !req
510. 20 past three. We're out of time.Copy !req
511. We're not out of time!Copy !req
512. We're not out of time.Copy !req
513. It's not going to happen.Copy !req
514. To the public...Copy !req
515. Fuck the public!Copy !req
516. To the public, this would be one man
of questionable popularityCopy !req
517. putting personal embarrassment
over the life of a girl.Copy !req
518. They will not release her anyway.
She's probably already dead.Copy !req
519. If she isn't,
he'll kill her and upload the video.Copy !req
520. Everyone will see it.
The world will see it.Copy !req
521. The mood will border on insurrection
and you will be destroyed,Copy !req
522. I guarantee you...
utterly destroyed.Copy !req
523. The polling bears that out.Copy !req
524. You won't just be
a disgraced politician,Copy !req
525. The public, the Palace and the Party
insist on compliance.Copy !req
526. Fuck the Party!Copy !req
527. Refuse, and I've been advisedCopy !req
528. that we cannot guarantee
your physical safety.Copy !req
529. Or that of your family.Copy !req
530. But...Copy !req
531. I've made arrangements
for the broadcast.Copy !req
532. I can't...Copy !req
533. I'm sorry, Michael.
It's out of your hands.Copy !req
534. 'Let's take you live to the
scene in central London.Copy !req
535. 'As we see the Prime Minister's car
travelling across London... 'Copy !req
536. He's got to do it.Copy !req
537. The world's bloody broken.Copy !req
538. '.. Appears to be heading west
to Bankside Studios.'Copy !req
539. BEEPINGCopy !req
540. BEEPING STOPSCopy !req
541. We've ratified the law...
after midnight,Copy !req
542. it'll be a criminal of fence to store
any recording or images of the event.Copy !req
543. They're doing an announcement
to warn people offCopy !req
544. even watching, some sonic
tone that causes nausea.Copy !req
545. '.. When public opinion
has very much hardened,Copy !req
546. 'following the delivery
of the princess's severed finger.Copy !req
547. 'As the 4pm deadline approaches,
the nation is at a stand stillCopy !req
548. 'watching the extraordinary
situation play out.Copy !req
549. 'Just to remind you, this is now
a story of global significance... 'Copy !req
550. "Michael Callow has displayed
incredible bravery"Copy !req
551. "in what was a matter
of life or death."Copy !req
552. That's how it opens,
then we should move on...Copy !req
553. OK. Yeah.Copy !req
554. Everything prepared?Copy !req
555. Yes, ma'am.Copy !req
556. It's sedated?Copy !req
557. Injection. It's docile.Copy !req
558. It's time to go in now.Copy !req
559. '.. An unprecedented nature.'Copy !req
560. 'This is an official announcement.Copy !req
561. In a few minutes,Copy !req
562. 'the Prime Minister will perform
an indecent act on your screens.Copy !req
563. '..in the hope that it will ensure
the release of Princess Susannah.Copy !req
564. 'Recording or possessing a copy of
this broadcast will become illegalCopy !req
565. at midnight.Copy !req
566. 'All viewers are advised to turn off
their televisions immediately.Copy !req
567. 'The broadcast will commence after
the following tone.'Copy !req
568. HIGH-PITCHED TONECopy !req
569. TONE CONTINUESCopy !req
570. We're complying with
the stipulated rules.Copy !req
571. You'll have to keep going...Copy !req
572. VOICE FADESCopy !req
573. you'll have to see it through
to the end.Copy !req
574. We've placed visual aids in your
eyeline, which might help if you...Copy !req
575. get into trouble.Copy !req
576. The suggestion we're getting
from psychologistsCopy !req
577. is that you should take
as long as you need.Copy !req
578. If you rush, it might be
misinterpreted as eagernessCopy !req
579. or even enjoyment.Copy !req
580. It's just
a skeleton crew inside.Copy !req
581. Closed set.Copy !req
582. SLURPINGCopy !req
583. SNUFFLING/SLURPINGCopy !req
584. EXCITED VOICESCopy !req
585. There he is!Copy !req
586. 'I trust this will bring about the
safe return of Princess Susannah.'Copy !req
587. 'I...Copy !req
588. 'I love my wife.'Copy !req
589. 'May God forgive me.'Copy !req
590. GROANS/LAUGHTERCopy !req
591. (WOMAN) Oh, no!Copy !req
592. VOICES FADECopy !req
593. Jesus! Poor bastard!Copy !req
594. But it's been on for nearly an hour.Copy !req
595. It's history, this.Copy !req
596. VOMITSCopy !req
597. We've got her. Susannah.Copy !req
598. They released her?Copy !req
599. Stumbling about in the city.Copy !req
600. Sedated. She can't remember
anything, but she's unharmed.Copy !req
601. But her finger?Copy !req
602. Not hers. DNA shows it's male.Copy !req
603. What?Copy !req
604. There is one other thing. There's a
CCTV grab of her from half three.Copy !req
605. It seems he let her go
30 minutes before it happened.Copy !req
606. Why?Copy !req
607. My guess...Copy !req
608. he knew everyone would
be elsewhereCopy !req
609. watching screens.Copy !req
610. So it's a statement.Copy !req
611. Ma'am?Copy !req
612. That's what this was all about,
making a point.Copy !req
613. Should we, er... ?Copy !req
614. Lose that page of the report.Copy !req
615. No-one sees it, especially the PM.Copy !req
616. Of course.Copy !req
617. Good news, Michael.Copy !req
618. You saved her.
Susannah's alive and well.Copy !req
619. CONTINUES RINGINGCopy !req
620. 'On the one-year anniversary
of his humiliating ordeal,Copy !req
621. 'an apparently unconcerned Michael
Callow put in an assured performanceCopy !req
622. 'at a public appearance,
accompanied by his wife Jane.Copy !req
623. Here I go.Copy !req
624. 'OK.Copy !req
625. 'Oh!Copy !req
626. 'The other central figure in events
was also before the cameraCopy !req
627. 'at last night's
Children Of Valour Awards.Copy !req
628. 'Princess Susannah
made her first public appearanceCopy !req
629. 'since announcing her pregnancy.Copy !req
630. 'It was one year ago that
the Turner Prize-winning artist,Copy !req
631. 'Carlton Bloom,Copy !req
632. 'coerced the Prime Minister
into committing an indecent act.Copy !req
633. 'As the anniversary arrived,
one art critic caused controversyCopy !req
634. 'by describing it as "the first
great artwork of the 21st century".Copy !req
635. 'While cultural commentators
debate its significance,Copy !req
636. 'with a global audience
of 1.3 billion,Copy !req
637. 'it was an event
in which we all participated.Copy !req
638. However, the incident failed
to destroy a Prime Minister,Copy !req
639. 'who holds an approval rating
three points higher than last year.Copy !req
640. 'Damon Brown, UKN.'Copy !req
641. Jane.Copy !req
642. Jane, please.Copy !req