1. Our next stopCopy !req
2. on our Southern California
"Yo Home Slice"Copy !req
3. Ghetto Gear
and Weed Tasting TourCopy !req
4. is the notorious
New Compton Gardens,Copy !req
5. a hot bed of drugs,
violence,Copy !req
6. cut-rate weed,
and designer knock-offs.Copy !req
7. To my left are genuine
African-American drug dealers.Copy !req
8. The average life-span... She must really dig it.Copy !req
9. of a ghetto drug dealer
is 28.Copy !req
10. So, obviously,
the two men you see hereCopy !req
11. are well past their prime.Copy !req
12. The residents
of this complexCopy !req
13. are, in many ways,
prisoners in their own homes,Copy !req
14. in constant fear
of gang violence.Copy !req
15. Time to make mama proud.Copy !req
16. Taste, please?Copy !req
17. That's some Fantastic
right there. Oh, thank you.Copy !req
18. Ahhh.Copy !req
19. Gang face, Yoga Bitches!Copy !req
20. - Get down!
- Duck!Copy !req
21. - Get down, everyone!
- Let's see what happens!Copy !req
22. That was real gangsta
hood shit!Copy !req
23. This craziness
needs to stop!Copy !req
24. Y'all was applauding
a drive-by?Copy !req
25. - Y'all are crazy!
- Thank you! Sayonara!Copy !req
26. - Thank you!
- Thank you!Copy !req
27. Hey, she didn't pay me
for my weed!Copy !req
28. Lloyd!Copy !req
29. What?Copy !req
30. As you know,
we just experiencedCopy !req
31. some incoming fire
from a local gang.Copy !req
32. That's them bitches
in spandex.Copy !req
33. Well, them bitches in spandex
got guns,Copy !req
34. and they will be back.Copy !req
35. I'm suggesting an armed
special show of forces.Copy !req
36. I call it
"Shut'em-down."Copy !req
37. It provides multiple layers
of security.Copy !req
38. Layer one,
the Word Keepers.Copy !req
39. You know what?Copy !req
40. Them young punksCopy !req
41. don't know they ass
from a hole in the ground!Copy !req
42. No. But look —
they don't got to.Copy !req
43. 'Cause of this.Copy !req
44. Damn, M-Track!
What the hell is that?Copy !req
45. And unmanned
reconnaissance vehicleCopy !req
46. with visual surveillance
capabilities.Copy !req
47. In other words,
it's a drone.Copy !req
48. Yeah, man,
it's custom-designedCopy !req
49. to keep an eye on things
around here.Copy !req
50. Look at this.Copy !req
51. See, it looks like
trash on the ground...Copy !req
52. Uh-huh... then, when you move
the bitch like this...Copy !req
53. that bitch look like a kite
from the bottomCopy !req
54. when you see it
in the air.Copy !req
55. Look at that.Copy !req
56. Ain't that a bitch.Copy !req
57. L-look, look.Copy !req
58. I see —
I see a bald spot!Copy !req
59. Clever, right?Copy !req
60. Who the hell
fly a kite in the hood?Copy !req
61. You should've made it look like
a pair of tennis shoesCopy !req
62. hanging on
some telephone wires.Copy !req
63. Uh-oh.Copy !req
64. Oh, damn.
Oh. Oh, damn.Copy !req
65. I got to go.Copy !req
66. Hey, no, no, no, man.
Come here, man. Look.Copy !req
67. I'm trying to tell you
my new plansCopy !req
68. for increased security with
Shut'em-down.Copy !req
69. Ambro,
you are head of security.Copy !req
70. Do everything you can
to keep everything secure.Copy !req
71. All right?Copy !req
72. Bye.Copy !req
73. All right.Copy !req
74. It's time to take
the streets back.Copy !req
75. And if not,
at least shoot some shit up.Copy !req
76. Can't get away from Darby.Copy !req
77. Oh, what am I gonna do now?Copy !req
78. Maybe some TV on.Copy !req
79. Let me check this TV out.Copy !req
80. All right.
What do we got here?Copy !req
81. Oh, yeah,
Look at that.Copy !req
82. "Real Ho Wives
of Atlanta."Copy !req
83. They put the "trifle"
in "triflin',"Copy !req
84. the "get" in "ghetto,
and the "hoe" in ho-ho—Copy !req
85. Hold it a minute.Copy !req
86. I smell ass.Copy !req
87. I didn't know they made
a scratch-and-sniff television!Copy !req
88. What the...Copy !req
89. Nice fragrance, too.Copy !req
90. Smell like Darby.Copy !req
91. What the hell going on?Copy !req
92. That's some Jesus bullshit.Copy !req
93. First he take
my desire to get drunk,Copy !req
94. then he taunt me
with some booty-crack
smellin' like Darby.Copy !req
95. Oh, that's some cold shit
to do to a man.Copy !req
96. And he ain't gonna
get away with it.Copy !req
97. He ain't gonna
get away with it.Copy !req
98. Jesus!
I'ma get drunk.Copy !req
99. You ain't gonna stop me
from getting drunk.Copy !req
100. Tell you that.Copy !req
101. I'ma get drunk.Copy !req
102. Mm.Copy !req
103. Mm. Yep. Let me see.Copy !req
104. Oh, that looks good.Copy !req
105. Um...Copy !req
106. So, these are quarters,
right?Copy !req
107. And these go over here.Copy !req
108. And we need some eighths.Copy !req
109. Yeah.
And these go over here.Copy !req
110. Okay, Daddy!Copy !req
111. All right.Copy !req
112. I love you, baby.Copy !req
113. You doing a good job
with that dope.Copy !req
114. Uh...Copy !req
115. I was hoping Rihanna
come through the door.Copy !req
116. Even with Jesus
as your best friend,Copy !req
117. that ain't gonna
never happen.Copy !req
118. Hey, Mommy, look!Copy !req
119. This is a quarter.Copy !req
120. This is seventh.Copy !req
121. Uh, th-that's an eighth,
sweetie.Copy !req
122. Boonie, you teaching
your little girlCopy !req
123. how to bag weed?Copy !req
124. Look, she bagging it,
not smoking it.Copy !req
125. Besides,
it's good math practice.Copy !req
126. Fractions and stuff.Copy !req
127. Her teacher told us
to pay extra attentionCopy !req
128. to the math, remember?Copy !req
129. So I'm preparing her
for schoolCopy !req
130. and us for that parent-teacher
conference we got.Copy !req
131. You not preparing her
for that.Copy !req
132. You preparing her
for a life of crime, Boonie,Copy !req
133. and us a visit from
Child Protection Services!Copy !req
134. Boonlinka, put that down.
Come on.Copy !req
135. Your daddy gon' have you
in foster care.Copy !req
136. Boonie,
I'm 'bout to drop her offCopy !req
137. at my mama's house,Copy !req
138. and I'ma come back
and get youCopy !req
139. so we can go to this
parent-teacher conferenceCopy !req
140. at the school.Copy !req
141. And be ready!Copy !req
142. Big earrings, big mouth...Copy !req
143. big back.Copy !req
144. - Got it?
- Good work, Word Keepers!Copy !req
145. Keep it up!Copy !req
146. That car goes
to checkpoint Bravo,Copy !req
147. that sofa
to checkpoint Charlie.Copy !req
148. - Yeah.
- Hey!Copy !req
149. What's your name?
- Roger that.Copy !req
150. Scambro?Copy !req
151. Ambro.Copy !req
152. Ms. Booty, right?Copy !req
153. The name is Ms. Tudi.Copy !req
154. Right. What is all this?Copy !req
155. A garage sale?Copy !req
156. Oh, nah.
These are vehicle checkpoints.Copy !req
157. This is
Shut'em-down.Copy !req
158. Shut'em-down.Copy !req
159. The Word Keepers
are gonna be occupyingCopy !req
160. the control points
of this area.Copy !req
161. So that way,
no unauthorized vehiclesCopy !req
162. will be able
to get through.Copy !req
163. For how long?Copy !req
164. All day.Copy !req
165. All day?
All day.Copy !req
166. Ain't gon' be no drive-bysCopy !req
167. while I am in charge
of securityCopy !req
168. for this complex.No drive-bys!Copy !req
169. Who is this nigga?Copy !req
170. Oh, that's Clancy.
That's my second in command.Copy !req
171. Crazy-ass motherfuckerCopy !req
172. Ooh. Now,
if you'll excuse me,Copy !req
173. uh, duty calls.Copy !req
174. You's a crazy-ass nigga.Copy !req
175. Stupid Anthrax.Copy !req
176. Have a good day,
Ms. Booty.Copy !req
177. Nigga, don't have me
come in thereCopy !req
178. and knock over
your wheelchair, hear?Copy !req
179. Still here to protect you,
Ms. Booty.Copy !req
180. And all that ass.Copy !req
181. I heard that!Copy !req
182. If you don't live here,Copy !req
183. you can turn around
and get the fuck out.Copy !req
184. Fuck!Copy !req
185. Damn it, Clancy!Copy !req
186. This is an integral piece
of our operation, man!Copy !req
187. I thought you said you flew
one of these in the Air Force!Copy !req
188. I-I did,
but I flew in the plane,Copy !req
189. not below it!Copy !req
190. Internet say I can get drunk.Copy !req
191. Just follow the instructions.Copy !req
192. Paprika.Copy !req
193. Oooh, boy!Copy !req
194. Cinnamon.Copy !req
195. Yes, indeedy.Copy !req
196. All right. Some sugar.Copy !req
197. Chicharrón.Copy !req
198. A little crushed garlic.Copy !req
199. And look at that —
That Damn Devil.Copy !req
200. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
201. Okay.Copy !req
202. Damn you, Internet!Copy !req
203. I ain't get drunk
off this shit!Copy !req
204. Agh!Copy !req
205. All right. Listen up.Copy !req
206. This is it.Copy !req
207. This is
the turning point.Copy !req
208. This where it's all
gonna get better.Copy !req
209. If Scambro
and his soldiers of misfortuneCopy !req
210. don't fuck it up.Copy !req
211. But we just got shot at again
this morning, Ms. Tudi.Copy !req
212. What if the Yoga Ladies
come back trippin'?Copy !req
213. Baby, they got that
out of the way early.Copy !req
214. They ain't coming back.Copy !req
215. But this nigga's
dumb-ass operationCopy !req
216. could cost me my sale.Copy !req
217. Listen here.Copy !req
218. In less than an hour,Copy !req
219. I got carload of
horny senior citizens coming,Copy !req
220. and they're expecting
suitcases of weed and Viagra.Copy !req
221. How 'bout
you call the senior citizensCopy !req
222. and tell them
we gonna move the saleCopy !req
223. to another location, huh?Copy !req
224. You don't understandCopy !req
225. how skittish
these old players are!Copy !req
226. Plus, they don't even know
the shit is basically legal.Copy !req
227. So if anything changes,
anything,Copy !req
228. they gone for good.Copy !req
229. And then I'm stuck
with suitcasesCopy !req
230. full of punk-ass weed
and penis pills.Copy !req
231. Nigga,
what are you doing?Copy !req
232. Ms. Tudi, is these
Vitamin V even really real?Copy !req
233. I mean, the instructions
ain't even in English.Copy !req
234. Jesus,
foreigners like sex, too.Copy !req
235. I'm just saying,
Ms. Tudi,Copy !req
236. I'ma feel real bad
if these pills are counterfeitCopy !req
237. and these old folks
can't get nothing upCopy !req
238. but they hopes.Copy !req
239. Boonie,
try one of those.Copy !req
240. See if it's real.Copy !req
241. So you just gonna experiment
on your son, Ms. Tudi?Copy !req
242. Come on.
What?Copy !req
243. Your father killed his.Copy !req
244. Ah — Hey.
Mm-hmm.Copy !req
245. He the only one with a dick,
okay?Copy !req
246. Hm?
A dick that work.Copy !req
247. Boonie,
I said take "one"!Copy !req
248. Nothing can cut
the smell of this shit...Copy !req
249. Mmm.Copy !req
250. but Darby!Copy !req
251. I smell Darby.Copy !req
252. I know there's none here.Copy !req
253. But I'ma track it down
no matter what it takes.Copy !req
254. I'ma be like a hound dog
to get that Darby.Copy !req
255. Darby!Copy !req
256. I'm coming to get
your fine ass!Copy !req
257. Yes, I am.Copy !req
258. - Ooooh-whoo!
- Get it locked down.Copy !req
259. Look at that
pretty ghetto bird.Copy !req
260. Yeah, make that barricade
a little bit taller.Copy !req
261. Checkpoint
Charlie, checkpoint Bravo.Copy !req
262. Tires always
checkpoint Bravo.Got it.Copy !req
263. There will be no infiltrating
these streets today.Copy !req
264. Oh, Operation: Shut'em-down
is in full effect.Copy !req
265. Ain't that right,
Word Keepers?Copy !req
266. - Word!
- Word!Copy !req
267. Jesus, I think you right.Copy !req
268. We gonna have
to call them old bastardsCopy !req
269. and have them meet us
someplace else.Copy !req
270. It ain't nothing but
a phone call, Ms. Tudi.Copy !req
271. Boonie, hand me
my damn cellphone.Copy !req
272. Come on, boy.Copy !req
273. Why are you limpin'?Copy !req
274. Ooh... It's...Copy !req
275. Ohh,
that shit done kicked in?Copy !req
276. I told you that counterfeit
Viagra was on point.Copy !req
277. Oooh.
Gangsta, Ms. Tudi.Copy !req
278. Damn. Unh. Mm.Copy !req
279. Hello?Copy !req
280. Hello?Copy !req
281. Hello?Copy !req
282. She hung up.Copy !req
283. Lord, why do you give
old people technology?Copy !req
284. 'Cause it tickle the shit
out of Pops.Copy !req
285. Yo, man, what's up
with the surveillance?Copy !req
286. Watch out, Clancy.
I got this. Ooh.Copy !req
287. Whoa!Copy !req
288. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Ah, ah, ah.Copy !req
289. Stop the damn car.Copy !req
290. Stop the damn car.Copy !req
291. Stop pointing that damn gun
at me, Ambro.Copy !req
292. I came here to see Boonie.Copy !req
293. I said turn off
the goddamn engine.Copy !req
294. I ain't
turning off shit.Copy !req
295. Move out my way. Let's go, ladies.
Move it!Copy !req
296. Okay, we got
a situation at Charlie.Copy !req
297. Shalinka to see Boonie.Copy !req
298. I need to search the car. 10-4 Ambro.Copy !req
299. You not searching my car.Copy !req
300. Why not?Copy !req
301. Because it's my car.Copy !req
302. And what you got to hide?Copy !req
303. The shit in my car.Copy !req
304. And what is with this outfit
you wearing?Copy !req
305. Cosplay?Copy !req
306. No, this ain't
no motherfuckin cosplay.Copy !req
307. I don't even know
what the hell that is.You know what?Copy !req
308. You getting on my damn nerves,
Ambro.Copy !req
309. I ain't come here
for this shit today,Copy !req
310. and I ain't got time for it.Copy !req
311. I got a parent-teacher
conference to go to.Copy !req
312. I'm already nervous
about that.Copy !req
313. I know the war was rough,Copy !req
314. and a lot of y'all got back here
with real problems.Copy !req
315. But I encourage you
to get some help.Copy !req
316. But first,
let me encourage youCopy !req
317. to stay
the fuck away from meCopy !req
318. and have
a precious damn day!Copy !req
319. You can't stop me
from seeing my baby daddy.Copy !req
320. You done lost your mind. All right, then.Copy !req
321. Okay. We got a —Copy !req
322. We were right on you.
All right.Copy !req
323. We got a rogue. Especially if you can'tCopy !req
324. stop somebody from getting
through with a couch.Copy !req
325. Okay, Word Keepers.
We got a code —Copy !req
326. Ain't no damn
Word Keepers.Copy !req
327. But I bet
I'm going throughCopy !req
328. this bullshit-ass
barricade.Copy !req
329. Ain't none of y'all
got a phone charger?Copy !req
330. Oh, shit!Copy !req
331. Clancy!Copy !req
332. Come on.Copy !req
333. Okay.Copy !req
334. Look at that.
Come on, now.Copy !req
335. Come on here.Copy !req
336. There we go.
Come on, then.Copy !req
337. All right.Copy !req
338. Who knew that I could smell
Darby in a liquor storeCopy !req
339. a half mile away?Copy !req
340. Oh, my goodness.
Lookit here.Copy !req
341. Now, if I can't get drunk
drinking it, uh...Copy !req
342. Maybe... just maybe...Copy !req
343. Hm.Copy !req
344. Let's try it.Copy !req
345. No one to stop me.Copy !req
346. Come on.Copy !req
347. Come on, Darby.Copy !req
348. I'm depending on you.Copy !req
349. I don't get it.Copy !req
350. Boonie, Boonlinka
is your daughter.Copy !req
351. Ms. Tudi,
she's your granddaughter.Copy !req
352. And, Jesus,
she's a child of God.Copy !req
353. Y'all should be helping
me and BoonieCopy !req
354. be on time for this meeting
at Boonlinka's school.Copy !req
355. Instead, y'all in here
hiding out like Anne Frank,Copy !req
356. schemin' how to get old folks
through barricadesCopy !req
357. so they can buy
weed and Viagra?Copy !req
358. What the hell
you lookin' at, Boonie?Copy !req
359. And what the hell
is this?Copy !req
360. Well, Ms. Tudi
kindly decidedCopy !req
361. to throw in
some free adult diapers.Copy !req
362. Counterfeit diapers,
Jesus?Copy !req
363. Ms.
No, no, no, no.Copy !req
364. These are called
"Tight and Tidy."Copy !req
365. Ain't that an accident
waiting to happen.Copy !req
366. And I intended the hell
out of that pun.Copy !req
367. So, when I push
this down like this,Copy !req
368. I want you
to push the button forward.Copy !req
369. Got it?Copy !req
370. Yeah.
The thing is, Ambro, I...Copy !req
371. I'd be better
with a steering wheel.Copy !req
372. See, these things is like
operating two tiny penises.Copy !req
373. I wouldn't know nothing
about that, Clancy.Copy !req
374. Hold up.Copy !req
375. Okay.Copy !req
376. Now!Copy !req
377. Whoooo-ooh!Copy !req
378. It pretty!Copy !req
379. Fly, sugar baby! Fly!Copy !req
380. What's wrong with you?Copy !req
381. Man, nothin', it's just...Copy !req
382. It's just that,
uh, you know,Copy !req
383. Li'l Boonie needs
some lil' love right now,Copy !req
384. you know what I'm saying?Copy !req
385. To help him get straight.Copy !req
386. Or maybe un-straight.Copy !req
387. Hey, let's hit that bathroom up
for a hot minute.Copy !req
388. Boonie, you know we too damn big
for that bathroom.Copy !req
389. That bathroom ain't big enough
for two ants to get busy in.Copy !req
390. And why you pushin' up?
We ain't drunk.Copy !req
391. Wait a damn minute.Copy !req
392. Did your mama make you take
some of them pillsCopy !req
393. to prove their efficacy?Copy !req
394. Efficacy?Copy !req
395. What — Oh, you fuckin
professors now?Copy !req
396. No, she did it
to prove to JesusCopy !req
397. they could make
my dick hard.Copy !req
398. Black Jesus: Look, dawg,
I don't need no proofCopy !req
399. of your junk getting hard.Copy !req
400. I just didn't want her
selling them old folksCopy !req
401. no false promises.Copy !req
402. Man, trust me.
This stuff is extra-strength.Copy !req
403. You get the whole —Copy !req
404. Ms. Tudi,
how you gonna experimentCopy !req
405. on your own
child's genitalsCopy !req
406. with some fake-ass
pharmaceuticals?Copy !req
407. Shalinka,
do me a solid here,Copy !req
408. and don't mess with me
no more today.Copy !req
409. I'm trying to figure
out how to get these
niggas out the wayCopy !req
410. before the seniors come.Copy !req
411. What the hell?Copy !req
412. Hey, Ambro!
I got a doctor's appointment! What the hell is that?Copy !req
413. Look like some kind of
trash heap or something.Copy !req
414. Oh, no.
That's a drone.Copy !req
415. You see the camera?Copy !req
416. Ambro's probably using it
for surveillance.Copy !req
417. Oh, shoot.
Here come Ms. Evans.Copy !req
418. All right, I need a diversion.
Here, hold this, Shalinka.Copy !req
419. - Whoa!
- What?Copy !req
420. - Hey, hey, hey!
- Hey, hey.Copy !req
421. Drone down!Copy !req
422. Heads up!Copy !req
423. - Aah!
- Oh! Oh, Lord!Copy !req
424. - Clancy!
- We got a fire!Copy !req
425. It wasn't me, Am!
Somebody shot it down!Copy !req
426. Damn. I didn't know
it was gonna do all that.Copy !req
427. Lis— Listen.
You got to go.
Go, go, go, go!Copy !req
428. Word Keepers!Copy !req
429. Checkpoint Charlie's
under attack!Copy !req
430. Checkpoint Charlie's
under attack!Copy !req
431. Boonie, here they come.Copy !req
432. It hurts to run!Copy !req
433. Nothing true, y'all.Copy !req
434. Here come my stuff.
That's what I'm talking about.Copy !req
435. Mm, mm, mm.Copy !req
436. All right.Copy !req
437. Whew!
Y'all — y'all good?Copy !req
438. You sure this weed is good?Copy !req
439. And — and the pills
gonna grow wood?Copy !req
440. Trust me,
this stuff ain't no joke.Copy !req
441. Okay. You ain't playing me,
are you?Copy !req
442. I ain't pla— Feel that.Copy !req
443. Hey. Take your digits.Copy !req
444. Get on away from here,
boy.Copy !req
445. Girl...Copy !req
446. Watch out! Get in!Copy !req
447. - Get down! No, get down!
- Ow!Copy !req
448. Damn! I think I shattered
Li'l Boonie!Copy !req
449. Get down!Copy !req
450. - Here they come right now!
- Incoming!Copy !req
451. Freedom fighters!Copy !req
452. Oh!Copy !req
453. Aaaah!Copy !req
454. Yoga Bitches run this hood,
Tudi!Copy !req
455. - Namaste, bitch!
- Get 'em, mama!Copy !req
456. - Watch out!
- What the hell?Copy !req
457. Aaaah!Copy !req
458. Black Jesus:
Whose car that is, Boonie?Copy !req
459. That was amazing.Copy !req
460. Word Keepers,
we protected home base.Copy !req
461. But those bitches
will be back.Copy !req
462. It's time for review.Copy !req
463. Brrrr!Copy !req
464. Ohhhh! Hmmm! Darby.Copy !req
465. Oh, yeah.
That feel good.Copy !req
466. Come on, Darby.
Work your magic.Copy !req
467. It ain't working!
Damn you, Jesuuuuus!Copy !req
468. Boonlinka is a very special
little girl.Copy !req
469. She — are you okay,
Mr. Johnson?Copy !req
470. Is that a Tight and Tidy
adult diaper?Copy !req
471. Uh, yeah.Copy !req
472. It's just
this little cut I got.Copy !req
473. It's really started bleedingCopy !req
474. now that the pill I took
wore off.Copy !req
475. And I feel like all the blood
is rushing downCopy !req
476. from Li'l Boonie,
and...Copy !req
477. But — but I'ma be...Copy !req
478. I, uh...Copy !req
479. It's — my — my blood.Copy !req
480. Oh...Copy !req
481. This punk-ass. I —Copy !req
482. Miss Marburry,
can we reschedule, please?Copy !req