Billions 1x7

1. Previously on "Billions"...

2. Donnie Caan.

3. We're gonna triple up his stack.

4. Get started with 200,000 shares of Rubinex.

5. Dean, seventh President. Hint? Two after Monroe.

6. Jackson. Andrew Jackson.

7. Gordie, where was he from?

8. Border areas near the Carolinas.

9. All I have to do is drop the hammer,

10. and you will look like absolute shit.

11. I need you to find Martina Slovis.

12. Dropped out of Brooklyn Law. Only for me.

13. Raul Gomez. New York City Police Pension Fund.

14. I wanna thank you for meeting with me in person.

15. I knew that if I gave you my money,

16. you would do whatever you had to

17. and wouldn't care what it looked like.

18. This company came under attack.

19. We're gonna put him in a cell.

20. We will mobilize the war machine!

21. - Fuck, yeah!

22. I have never seen him like this.

23. - You think I'm overreacting? - Tell me more about

24. - what he's doing. - He's looking for a win.

25. The defendant agrees to an aggregate financial penalty

26. of 1.9 billion dollars.

27. Didn't he say that he would never settle?

28. That's what he's been saying.

29. How did it happen?

30. We can make that $1.9 back in, what, eight months?

31. Six.

32. You'll never trade securities again,

33. not even for yourself.

34. - I can't live in the middle. - You won't.

35. I've decided, for the good of our marriage,

36. I've recused myself.

37. You can count on me to finish what you started.

38. I'm all in.

39. I'm still gonna need you to keep me informed.

40. Then you're not really recused.

41. I am. Officially.

42. ♪ theme music ♪

43. ♪ All eyes look up to me ♪

44. ♪ High above the filthy streets ♪

45. Hey, wait up. Dad's over there.

46. Again? You guys are bleeding me dry.

47. Axelrods, you learned good from your dad.

48. Always let someone else float you,

49. no matter how rich you are.

50. - Thank you, Mr. Layner. - Thanks, Dad.

51. Another, honey.

52. ♪ For the first time in my life, I'm sure ♪

53. ♪ I'm the boy ♪

54. ♪ For the last time in my life ♪

55. ♪ All the love... ♪

56. You guys could've bought that crap for a nickel.

57. ♪ For the last time will not reach... ♪

58. Guess it doesn't matter to you guys. Let's go.

59. There?

60. ♪♪♪

61. - Hey, Bruce! Boys!

62. Mommy, my soda!

63. Shit.

64. ♪♪♪

65. - Okay, big guys.

66. ♪♪♪

67. ♪ I'm the boy they couldn't ignore ♪

68. ♪ For the first time in my life, I'm sure ♪

69. - ♪ I'm the — ♪

70. Hi, Mom. - Hi.

71. Hi, Mom. - Hi.

72. Later.

73. So, how was it?

74. Great. Awesome.

75. - Hey.

76. Are the kids home okay?

77. Yeah. Why?

78. I saw them with Bruce Layner,

79. and it seemed like he was drinking.

80. He was drinking.

81. But I couldn't get to them in time.

82. Thank you, Lilly. No, I definitely needed that info.

83. And I appreciate that you called.

84. Hey, guys, before you get in, I need to ask you something.

85. Was Mr. Layner acting weird?

86. A little.

87. He kept saying things about money.

88. He tried to make us feel bad.

89. And what else?

90. Did he, like...

91. Was he drinking in the car?

92. Answer your mother.

93. He had a beer can in the car.

94. I could smell it from the backseat.

95. Why didn't you say something? Why did you let him drive you?

96. He's an adult.

97. Are you sure he was drinking alcohol

98. while he was driving you?

99. Lilly said it was more than one.

100. Yeah, Dad. He was.

101. Bobby!

102. ♪ You're a young cowpoke in the Lord's corral ♪

103. ♪♪♪

104. ♪ And there ain't nothing to stop you now ♪

105. ♪♪♪

106. ♪ But you rolled around like a squeaky wheel ♪

107. Margy time!

108. Who wants a margy?

109. ♪♪♪

110. Hey, hey, Axe!

111. You drove my kids drunk?

112. Whoa, man. I had a beer or two.

113. Three tops. Hardly even buzzed.

114. I got your precious, fucking babies home.

115. What? I will kill you, you motherfucker!

116. - Uhh! Oh!

117. ♪ But you gave me gasoline ♪

118. Get up!

119. ♪ Say please ♪

120. That's gonna fucking cost you.

121. - Worth it. - ♪ Say please ♪

122. Someone call the police.

123. ♪♪♪

124. ♪ Say please ♪

125. Would you like a water or a coffee, Mr. Spyros?

126. I would love a cortado.

127. - Uh...

128. We don't have a machine.

129. Well, maybe someone can run out.

130. - It's just me on a Sunday.

131. No, no. On me.

132. Um... will they know what that is?

133. Cortado.

134. It's like a macchiato, but with more foam.

135. Microfoam. Silkier.

136. Thanks, doll.

137. - Just so you know,

138. I don't go for the price of an espresso...

139. - or even a few espressi

140. or for any price.

141. You blew up the settlement conference.

142. You recused yourself.

143. So we have to come to a new understanding

144. about my role.

145. And it's gotta be a bigger one.

146. A lead role.

147. My stink is gonna be all over this now.

148. As you point out,

149. uh, I, myself, am recused from the case.

150. On the outside.

151. So how could I possibly be bound by —

152. Oh, come on.

153. We both know your recusal is for show.

154. Don't make me dig out the old CB radio

155. and call in a convoy of reporters and investigators

156. to examine it.

157. Oh, maybe we interview your wife or —

158. Okay.

159. You win. Again.

160. Uh, we did make a deal.

161. And even though I was under duress at the time,

162. I will stick to it.

163. So you'll come in one afternoon this week

164. when we're open for business.

165. I will make sure that Connerty has his entire team assembled,

166. and they will run you through all of it.

167. Work hand in hand with you and the SEC.

168. No. Not hand in hand.

169. I'm gonna run point on this,

170. and I need to hear you say that you're comfortable with that.

171. I wanna be the fucking commandant.

172. ♪ tense music ♪

173. I'll pass word to my people.

174. - Uh, what about your cortado? - You drink it.

175. Yeah, Dale?

176. I'm gonna need Martina Slovis's contact info now.

177. ♪ tense music ♪

178. I'm here for the Stewart bachelor party.

179. Uh, right back there.

180. ♪♪♪

181. Do all guys in my position hate themselves for doing this?

182. No reason you should.

183. You're doing the right thing now.

184. Not that they should. It's just human nature.

185. Look, Axelrod, you know, sweeps his phones,

186. hires security to defend himself.

187. So believe me, on some level, this is what he expects,

188. - what he knows he deserves.

189. Not from me.

190. So feel a little bad then,

191. but don't change what you're doing,

192. like me with double cheeseburgers.

193. No, but, Dale, you need to stop. He needs to keep going.

194. We need him to do a deal with you directly.

195. And when he does, we need you to confirm

196. the source of the information, that it's insider.

197. Well, that's gonna be hard to get him to do.

198. That's why you're getting such a cherry fucking deal

199. for making it happen. Huh?

200. Okay, let's get him wired up.

201. Sorry to bother,

202. but I wanted to check in on the Kemlot trade.

203. And you canceled the Sunday night call, so...

204. It turned into a bit of a weekend.

205. Okay. Uh, I want to know if you think I should be ready

206. to pull the trigger at the open tomorrow.

207. Wait.

208. - But you said — - I'm not certain.

209. Okay, then. Thanks.

210. Uh, is everything all right?

211. Yeah. Yeah, like I said, it was a bit of a weekend.

212. Why don't you come in for a drink?

213. It's more than understandable.

214. Given the circumstance, it was inevitable.

215. The son of a bitch deserved it.

216. But I earned my living by staving off the inevitable.

217. Let the other dogs drool when the bell rings.

218. I wait for the actual food to turn up.

219. That way I get fed while the rest howl in the wind.

220. We don't get to choose how and when we react.

221. That's what the experiment proves.

222. You've actually read Pavlov's study, haven't you?

223. Yeah. I was a psych/philosophy major.

224. Minor in economic theory,

225. which, at Yale, is like another philosophy class.

226. Broadness of thinking.

227. That's the shit that sets you apart, Donnie.

228. It's this shit that used to distract me

229. while the other guys were racking up cartel-sized bonuses.

230. No more.

231. Look, no matter how civilized we get,

232. at base, we are animals.

233. Oh, yeah. I know. I know.

234. I just wish I had... I...

235. You, Donnie, you'd have shown restraint.

236. For the sake of your kids.

237. Me? My kids are gonna grow up thinking that's the way

238. - you're supposed to act. - They didn't see it!

239. They'll hear about it.

240. They'll be embarrassed.

241. Or worse, proud.

242. Bullshit.

243. They should damn well be proud.

244. Their father stood tall for them.

245. It did feel pretty good.

246. If I could be that for my kids...

247. You are...

248. and you will continue to be.

249. ♪ pensive music ♪

250. All right, okay.

251. So let's go over what we've got so far.

252. The CI is close to Axelrod.

253. He has been leveraged and he's highly motivated

254. to save his own ass.

255. Get Connerty in here this afternoon.

256. Tell him to bring the team working

257. the Construction Bid Rigging RICO cases.

258. I need an update.

259. If word of this gets out, and it will,

260. it's a major key problem.

261. Your business faces an existential threat

262. if it's handled the wrong way.

263. The professional damage,

264. if you are convicted of even simple misdemeanor assault —

265. The prick drove our kids drunk.

266. He's the one who should be prosecuted.

267. He can't really press charges 'cause Bobby popped him.

268. He will. He has to.

269. It'll make his civil case that much stronger.

270. So we gotta control the narrative.

271. I'm already getting texts from gossip writers

272. who've heard rumors.

273. It's only a matter of time before Layner's team p—

274. And no doubt, he has a team in place by now.

275. Before they pick where they wanna dump the story

276. for maximum impact.

277. So we get our version out first.

278. You need your friend Lilly to speak up.

279. Say that she saw Layner drinking,

280. tried to stop him from taking the kids in the car.

281. - She won't. She will.

282. I'll get to her today.

283. I asked Chief Mueller to join us

284. so can break down how things will go at his former command —

285. Southampton PD.

286. Mr. Axelrod, I received some intel

287. just as I was arriving here today.

288. The police out East may have come into possession

289. of a video of the incident taking on someone's phone,

290. which purports to show you striking Mr. Layner.

291. - That should cut our way. - I'm not so sure.

292. - How bad is it? - Well, I haven't seen it yet,

293. but I've been told it's damning enough

294. that they're planning on arresting you

295. as early as tomorrow.

296. But when Mr. Bach reached out to me, I reached out.

297. And fortunately, even though I left the department

298. seven years ago, that I'm still remembered fondly back there.

299. That's good for all of us.

300. It would be a big help if you could get confirmation

301. of Layner's drinking.

302. With that, the air goes out of the balloon on prosecuting you.

303. Without it, you'll likely be indicted and tried.

304. I'm arranging a back door arrival at the station house

305. for the two of us and Mr. Bach.

306. Well, most people would kill to have your career.

307. Depending on what you want,

308. I can get on the phone and bring you a dozen offers by 5 p.m.

309. Can we...

310. Let's slow this down. I need to be discreet.

311. Understood.

312. This is just a reconnaissance mission.

313. I'm not committing here.

314. Right. You're not sure what you want,

315. which is a new feeling for someone like you.

316. That won't work on me. I know all the tricks.

317. I'm sure you do.

318. Plus, you're brilliant.

319. Billie always told me that you were the smartest

320. of all of her friends.

321. She said nice things about you, too, Chase.

322. I'm not sure I want the specifics behind that look.

323. Good. That's all you're getting.

324. All right, well, then let's talk about you.

325. What can I do for you to help you figure this out?

326. No hedge funds.

327. Nothing in finance.

328. I can't work for a competitor. That would feel wrong.

329. Well, that limits us.

330. What's more important to you, the comp or the work itself?

331. Do I have to choose? I have both now.

332. - It's rare. Both is hard. - How hard?

333. If you want to leave the hedgie world,

334. nearly impossible.

335. I don't know if I want to.

336. It's what's best for my family.

337. Well, corporate HR jobs with huge comp

338. won't be hands-on with clients.

339. And the rewarding work, like the stuff you're doing now,

340. digging deep with folks who need to change quickly,

341. that really only happens in the nonprofit sector.

342. You'll be living on love instead of money.

343. So you've got nothing for me.

344. Nothing without a compromise.

345. I wanna shoot straight with you from the beginning,

346. which is not usually how I work.

347. Did you just say that out loud?

348. For some reason, I don't wanna bullshit you

349. into giving me a retainer.

350. I wonder why that is.

351. You all have 'em.

352. So-called friends at other funds

353. who tell you that we're dinosaurs,

354. oblivious to our own extinction.

355. Are you gonna tell us they're not our real friends, Mom?

356. - I'm gonna tell you

357. that they're assholes... and wrong.

358. While it's true we have less outside money,

359. the trade-off is freedom.

360. Yes. - This is our time.

361. Those of you in this room will be telling the story

362. years from now about how we got up off the canvas

363. and knocked the rest of 'em out.

364. In fact, we won't even have to tell them,

365. because they will all be in here begging for jobs.

366. Yeah!

367. To that end, you know...

368. You know it. - ... knocking folks out,

369. a couple of us got you something, Axe.

370. I mean, you earned it.

371. - We just picked it up.

372. Whoo!

373. All right. There it is.

374. We heard you knocked that fucker on his ass.

375. ♪ pensive music ♪

376. ♪♪♪

377. ♪♪♪

378. Hey.

379. Well, you're certainly winning friends

380. and influencing people these days.

381. Oh, what do you want me to say?

382. I shouldn't have thrown that punch.

383. You've done a lot of rash things you shouldn't have done lately.

384. Oh. Oh, you're talking about

385. that little sit-down with your husband?

386. - I am.

387. You know, there's a psychological profile

388. for people who self-sabotage,

389. and... you're starting to fit it.

390. The term, when it comes to that settlement meeting,

391. is self-defense, not self-sabotage.

392. I might've been wrong at the barbecue,

393. but sometimes I gotta hit back.

394. - The way I heard it — - Don't worry about it.

395. You just did what you thought was right,

396. and I appreciate that.

397. But just think about who had what to lose.

398. I know that I went into that room ready to make a deal.

399. ♪ tense music ♪

400. It just bugs me, you know?

401. That Bobby clocked the guy?

402. No, that the kids didn't pick up that Layner was drunk,

403. that they didn't call me.

404. They had a phone?

405. Yeah. They always do.

406. They call me to tell me that their Instagram isn't loading.

407. They're just not street smart.

408. How are they gonna be street smart?

409. They've never been in the streets.

410. Yeah. Exactly.

411. If our situation ever changed, how would the boys deal with it?

412. The last piece is,

413. the contractor from the New Jersey firm

414. kept records on three different devices.

415. They're all in our possession.

416. Trial is in six weeks.

417. Great work. Thank you, guys.

418. Take it easy this weekend, T., yeah?

419. - Yeah, I'll try. - Take your kid

420. - to the batting cages. - Mm.

421. Uh, Bryan, hang in for a second.

422. Let's go over some of the details.

423. - Right.

424. You have an informant in Axe Capital.

425. Boss, we should stick to the rules of recusal,

426. the old Chinese Wall, shouldn't we?

427. Okay.

428. So we've been profiling all the players

429. and scanning the activity at Axe Cap,

430. and we see this Donnie Caan.

431. Usually a mid-level guy, but suddenly,

432. he loads up on Rubinex, a biochem company.

433. Loads way up. I mean, way above his usual range.

434. Mm-hmm. - The company, miraculously,

435. gets an FDA seal of approval on a product.

436. - Even more miraculously...

437. Caan is already there,

438. and he sells at a monster profit.

439. So I put the agents on,

440. and then they start bloodhounding him.

441. He couldn't provide the research on the trade.

442. He had no sign-offs from compliance.

443. He didn't have dick.

444. And our tech guys were able to pull meta-data

445. that established he'd been in contact with insiders.

446. We had him boxed up.

447. He broke like a Mexican condom.

448. He agreed to cooperate right away.

449. I wanna help you, Lara.

450. And Bobby.

451. Oh. Great.

452. And I would if I were sure, you know?

453. Sure? You're the one who told me.

454. I did.

455. And I feel bad that I started a whole thing, but...

456. Keith told me that we can't have any press right now,

457. that it would fuck his business badly to be near any of this.

458. His business?

459. He's my husband.

460. Not much else I can say.

461. I have to go.

462. Maid's leaving at 3:00 today.

463. Some bullshit about taking her kids to the doctor.

464. Mm.

465. Bye.

466. ♪ tense music ♪

467. I got your precious, fucking babies home.

468. What? I will kill you, your motherfucker.

469. - Uhh! Oh!

470. - Get up!

471. That's gonna fucking cost you.

472. Worth it.

473. Someone call the police.

474. The beginning — is there any more?

475. That's all.

476. We need to get more of the original video, if it exists.

477. It'll tell a totally different story about what happened.

478. - Who had this? - It's from Mike Dimonda.

479. Says it landed in his in-box this morning.

480. An exclusive.

481. - Well, he's doing us a solid. - Not so solid.

482. He knows that charges are being filed.

483. He's requesting comment,

484. wants to run something right away.

485. Who filmed that?

486. Dimonda won't say.

487. ♪ tense music ♪

488. Okay.

489. There were 11 people in the backyard.

490. There were two on the other side of the pool.

491. They didn't have a good view.

492. The video was from my left side.

493. There were only... six people on my left.

494. One of them was Layner's wife.

495. She was holding a platter. She didn't have an iPhone.

496. Layner's kids were there...

497. ♪♪♪

498. and his son from his first marriage.

499. It wasn't him either.

500. He was still wet and had his bathing suit on.

501. ♪♪♪

502. That kid's girlfriend.

503. There was another girl

504. standing next to her, about the same age — 17.

505. Neither of them had been in the pool.

506. Each of them had a phone out.

507. Holy shit!

508. I fucking love when you do that.

509. Your love is touching,

510. but what I need right now is to find that original video.

511. Find it, pay what we need, get it.

512. ♪♪♪

513. I have to go to the Hamptons.

514. ♪♪♪

515. Ah. Tommy.

516. How you doing, Chief?

517. I tell you, I've been better.

518. Summers out here enough to make you long for martial law.

519. You remember what it's like.

520. - Ah, sorry to hear it. - Ah, don't be.

521. It'd be better if, in addition to the college kids

522. and regular dirtbags, I didn't have my billionaires

523. punching out my multimillionaires.

524. It's bad for business.

525. Well, that's why we're here, to make your life easier.

526. We wanna quash this thing. No need for news stories.

527. No need for undue chatter.

528. Sure. Of course.

529. I lift the rug, and you guys sweep?

530. Or were you thinking vice versa, and I make with the broom?

531. Come on, Tommy, we both know

532. this is probably gonna end up in a payment situation.

533. Why don't we work together and get there sooner?

534. Uh-huh. Not so easy.

535. I've seen the video.

536. When it goes public, there's gonna be a lot of pressure.

537. So we'll take a statement of Mr. Axelrod's version of events.

538. If Mr. Layner refuses to relent,

539. if he insists on pressing charges,

540. if the DA doesn't like what he hears and chooses to proceed,

541. well, courtesy or not, Chief,

542. it'll be out of my hands.

543. - Hey, sweetheart. - Hey, baby.

544. - What's the latest?

545. Oh, you know.

546. Kevin had a friend over from school.

547. Told Eva she could hang, too,

548. and then pretty much ignored her.

549. How'd that play out?

550. She cried, and then he was nicer.

551. Oh. So a normal weekday afternoon negotiation, huh?

552. - Speaking of... - Mm-hmm?

553. Mmm.

554. How did the, uh,

555. breakdown of the settlement play out?

556. 'Cause the way you described it didn't sound —

557. Yeah. Well...

558. Well, I'll tell you, uh...

559. Things were all pre-negotiated, laid out.

560. But, you know, these conferences are...

561. unpredictable. Tensions are high.

562. Certain realities set in.

563. And, uh, big game fish often has one final thrash in him

564. as he gets close to the boat.

565. Anyway, as I said, then...

566. he tore up the check.

567. We have the Gilberts tomorrow night.

568. They could only get a table at 7:30, so...

569. make sure you can get there in time.

570. No chance of a reschedule?

571. - This is the reschedule...

572. of a reschedule.

573. - What?

574. I don't know. It's just I'm —

575. I'm just a little bit creeped out

576. by how close those two are.

577. They're married. Shouldn't they be close?

578. Not that close.

579. Oh, thank you.

580. Mmm. That's great, Ryan.

581. My breakfast kind of sucks.

582. What did you just say?

583. I'm sick of cheese omelettes.

584. The cheese is kind of sticky.

585. No sweat, big guy. What can I make you?

586. Nothing. The omelettes are great,

587. and both of you are finishing them.

588. But these are lame, and we have them, like, almost every day.

589. And dad never makes us finish our plates.

590. First, apologize to Chef Ryan.

591. Sorry.

592. And now let's go.

593. - Where? - Get in the car. Now.

594. Why is the water brown?

595. It just is. Now get in.

596. It's cold!

597. I wanna leave.

598. Stop whining, or I'll throw you in.

599. What are we doing?

600. You're clamming.

601. When I was a kid, me and Aunt Lu and all your uncles,

602. we had to come out here with Grandma

603. and collect 50 clams for Sunday dinner or we didn't eat.

604. And that taught us something about work,

605. about earning our own living.

606. What do we do?

607. You feel with your feet on the bottom for littlenecks.

608. Like this.

609. You shimmy.

610. So how many do you want us to get?

611. Well, you eat what you catch,

612. so you get as many as you can before the tide goes out.

613. When's that?

614. About four hours from now.

615. You know I didn't drive all the way up here to Westport

616. to give out "attaboys."

617. Had to bring the kick-ass. With love.

618. Rumblings got to me.

619. I hate motherfucking rumblings

620. because truth is always underneath 'em.

621. You hit some guy and knocked him out.

622. Down. Not out.

623. A fine distinction.

624. Thanks, Wags.

625. I hung in after Dollar Bill got arrested,

626. because if anyone knows you can't let one miscreant

627. tattoo a whole place, it's an ex-cop.

628. But if people think you're feeling the pressure,

629. acting out, hitting folks, for fuck's sake,

630. they will run for the exits.

631. Banks'll even look at you as a shaky investment.

632. Credit'll start drying up.

633. I won't let that happen.

634. The time to not let that happen was before you threw the punch.

635. Last thing I want to do is pull my money,

636. but I will.

637. If you take a conviction, even for a misdemeanor,

638. we are gone.

639. Settle your trouble.

640. Get a non-disclosure form signed.

641. I know. Thanks for coming in person.

642. Dimonda said he vetted the story and it's ready to run,

643. with or without comment.

644. Get me a meeting with him before he posts it.

645. Ari Spyros, live and in person.

646. Any special beverage requests?

647. No, not today, Chuck.

648. I'm just looking forward to seeing the team.

649. Oh, you'll see, all right.

650. I think you're gonna find this pretty interesting.

651. Right in there.

652. Martina Slovis.

653. ♪ dramatic music ♪

654. I warned you, if you fucked with me...

655. holy hell.

656. ♪♪♪

657. Did you ever wonder why we weren't pals anymore, Spyros?

658. I mean, we were in study groups together at law school.

659. Lawyers league softball team.

660. I thought it was just an inter-agency rivalry.

661. Mm. Think back.

662. It's before you were at SEC and I was here.

663. Summer of 2005,

664. the Willigut Farley mixer at Moran's.

665. I saw her at the bar, Martina Slovis.

666. She was a summer associate in corporate work.

667. I pointed you out, said that I'd come in with you,

668. and she went white.

669. Absolutely white.

670. And she just said the words,

671. "Ari Spyros raped me."

672. ♪♪♪

673. And you — you believed her?

674. We've been friends for six years.

675. I wasn't totally convinced,

676. until I found you at the table later.

677. And I said,

678. "Guess who I just ran into at the bar?

679. Martina Slovis."

680. You remember what you said?

681. ♪♪♪

682. "I fucked that little piece. What'd she say?"

683. That's when I knew.

684. You can't —

685. Okay, don't. That's enough.

686. - Sick.

687. - It would be he said, she said.

688. The statutes have run.

689. We both know what it was.

690. You destroyed a good part of that woman's life.

691. And she will work with me to destroy all of yours

692. if you don't fall the fuck back into line!

693. ♪♪♪

694. From here on in, I tell you your position in this,

695. if you have one at all.

696. ♪♪♪

697. So?

698. Um...

699. Well, she said she was surprised to get the call

700. considering she just went back and got her degree

701. a few years ago.

702. Hasn't really practiced.

703. She's living near Philly with young kids,

704. said she wasn't thinking about going back to work.

705. If you don't mind me saying so,

706. there's lots of lawyers out there

707. with much stronger litigation experience.

708. But I have notes on the interview.

709. No. Of course. It was just an idea.

710. Uh, pay for her ticket back

711. and put her on the reference list at the Philly office.

712. Mm-hmm.

713. I look forward to reading your notes. Thank you.

714. Okay.

715. ♪ Na na na na num ♪

716. ♪ Tasty smelling peppers with the linguin' on the side ♪

717. ♪ I know it gets confusing, you just cannot decide ♪

718. ♪ But if you cross your goombah ♪

719. ♪ There's not a place to hide ♪

720. ♪ So think about la panza with that little man inside ♪

721. ♪ Agita ♪

722. ♪ My goombah in the panzon ♪

723. ♪ When I eat, he gets his treat like a canzon ♪

724. ♪ He enjoys every meal, every bite that I steal ♪

725. ♪ Agita, my cumpÃ in the panzon ♪

726. ♪ Agita, my cumpÃ in the panzon ♪

727. - ♪ Agita ♪

728. Let's hear it for Nick, ladies and gentlemen!

729. - Yeah. And Sal —

730. He still — he still makes me pay.

731. I heard you ate everything on your plate

732. at the last joint, but you've been shy about going back.

733. I need to be careful whose tab I'm seen dining on.

734. And I'm not that comfortable among the, uh, one percenters.

735. Well, a place like this, a lot of these guys,

736. they don't show any income at all.

737. Yeah, but you didn't bring me here to eat

738. and gossip about wiseguys.

739. You want to address the story and the video.

740. And you're leading the pack with it.

741. Very impressive reporting.

742. Yeah. I landed it.

743. And I'm running it.

744. I'm not gonna spike it,

745. despite how good the veal chops are here.

746. No, of course not.

747. But that's not what we're talking about.

748. We're talking about a short hold.

749. A day.

750. So you still got a shot of being in the lead,

751. and you flying to Aspen to meet with a certain network chairman

752. about a show of your own.

753. Charlie Rose has got to move on at some point, right?

754. I can't accept a trip from you.

755. Won't be with me or my plane.

756. - Someone will see me. - No.

757. You'll land on a private strip

758. on private land.

759. Then I can't see myself running the piece tonight.

760. Mmm. Yummy.

761. - This is yummy.

762. For years, I couldn't eat tripe.

763. I thought I could still smell the shit in it.

764. Then I hypnotized him out of it.

765. - Mm. - Mmm.

766. You going for hypnotism now, Nancy?

767. - Oh. - Huh?

768. - It only works on him. - Ah.

769. I stare into his eyes,

770. he locks in on me...

771. and we will the change.

772. Work it does.

773. Can't even smell my own shit anymore.

774. I think from a, uh, biological standpoint,

775. there's a reason we smell our shit, hmm?

776. I think it's sweet, Chuck. I wish I could hypnotize you.

777. How do you think you got me here tonight?

778. ♪♪♪

779. So how's work?

780. - Mm. - It's great.

781. You know, when we started this little business,

782. we thought it was gonna be the two of us

783. selling our boutique robes practically door-to-door.

784. And now we've got 40 employees,

785. and half the luxury hotels in America

786. have our bathrobes on the bathroom door.

787. Mm-hmm. - It is an amazing success story.

788. - And to think,

789. you two are doing it together all day.

790. - Mm. - Yeah.

791. I never understood that part.

792. - Hmm? - How a husband and wife

793. can be like, uh, Siamese twins.

794. Conjoined, Chuck.

795. Sure.

796. Uh, no, I just... I'm just saying that I...

797. I don't get how you do the 24-hours-a-day thing.

798. All day, every day.

799. Don't you ever just want to, uh...

800. Wanna what?

801. No. - Yeah?

802. 17 years later, we can't imagine it any other way.

803. We weren't always like this.

804. For the first few years in our marriage,

805. - we each had our own lives. Mm-hmm.

806. Siloed.

807. But we made a conscious decision to live as one.

808. We started the business,

809. - commute together every day. - Yeah.

810. Shared passwords with each other.

811. You know, we recently crossed the final frontier.

812. - We have the same password. Yeah.

813. That's, um... that's not very secure.

814. ♪♪♪

815. I mean, we know each other's passwords, too. Don't we?

816. Yeah. Was yours still the same from two years ago...

817. - Yeah. - when I reset your hard drive?

818. - Mm-hmm. - Ah.

819. You?

820. Uh, well, you know, we have to reset every nine months.

821. ♪♪♪

822. I didn't not tell you. It just didn't occur.

823. - Mm. - I would, of course, so I will.

824. - I will.

825. We're close, but not conjoined.

826. We divide responsibilities at work.

827. - Hmm? How? - Well...

828. I handle the hugs. She takes care of the kisses.

829. ♪ rock music ♪

830. Jesus Christ,

831. did they really say that?

832. I — You know,

833. maybe that's what a normal relationship looks like.

834. You went to med school and practiced analysis.

835. Have you ever seen anything like that?

836. Come on. Nobody can be that in love...

837. - ... after 17 years.

838. There's no way you make googly eyes

839. at each other all day,

840. and then get home and still want to fuck.

841. ♪ dramatic music ♪

842. ♪♪♪

843. ♪♪♪

844. We have to toughen up the kids.

845. They'll get tough when they need to.

846. - Yeah? How?

847. Everything's served up for them on a platter.

848. The way we grew up,

849. we had to learn how to take care of ourselves.

850. Yeah, sure. We learned to scratch and claw for ours.

851. Not all upside, though.

852. - No? - No.

853. Remember when we first got together?

854. I was still an animal. I was too hard.

855. Not the sensitive flower you are today?

856. Exactly. I had to work to soften up.

857. - You worked me over.

858. And being thorny still gets me in trouble.

859. Yeah, well, I'd be willing for them to go in that direction.

860. You always said that the desperation

861. is what gave you an edge over the rich kids.

862. They are the rich kids.

863. Where are they gonna get their grit?

864. All right.

865. We'll put 'em on a fishing trawler for the summer,

866. stick them in the Foreign Legion.

867. They'll be men when we pick 'em up.

868. This is serious.

869. I hear you.

870. Whatever you come up with, you know I'll support.

871. Yeah. Hmm?

872. ♪ anxious music ♪

873. ♪♪♪

874. Mm.

875. ♪♪♪

876. - May I? - Yeah.

877. - You know...

878. I'm actually glad you have this Axe thing now.

879. I can devote myself

880. to the hundred other cases I'm building.

881. I want you to know that.

882. I'm glad to hear you say that, boss.

883. Yeah.

884. I just wish I were sure about this informant you have.

885. Uh-huh.

886. I mean, he sounds all right, the way you describe it,

887. so that's good.

888. But then, you don't have anything concrete yet.

889. - Early days. - Mm-hmm.

890. You know, one thing I used to do to informants

891. when I had your job,

892. every few weeks, I'd rough 'em up a little bit.

893. Really made sure they knew the spot I had 'em in.

894. Little motivational session.

895. Yes.

896. I have to meet with him soon, anyway, to give him the script

897. to get Axe to really incriminate himself.

898. - Mm-hmm. - Mm.

899. You know, Axe knows people everywhere,

900. so make sure you use a secure location.

901. There's a place I've used.

902. Very secure.

903. No chance that Axe is hooked in there.

904. I don't want to overstep, make an actual suggestion.

905. I'm sure you don't.

906. You wanted to see me?

907. Where have you been?

908. You haven't come in for weeks.

909. It looks like Axe has brought you close.

910. In the past, you've talked about feeling

911. almost intimidated by him in the work setting,

912. but you've got a lot of back and forth going now.

913. He's a great resource.

914. I decided I shouldn't shy away from that anymore.

915. ♪ tense music ♪

916. You used to be one of the most open people here,

917. but you've withdrawn from me.

918. Even now, I sense you withholding.

919. Maybe I'm just tired.

920. Maybe I'm — I'm just doing well

921. and I don't wanna jinx it by... talking about it.

922. ♪♪♪

923. I couldn't stop thinking about your problem.

924. - Uh-huh. - Now I know you're the doc,

925. but let me prescribe you something.

926. A boulevardier for her, please, and another one for me.

927. It's like a Negroni, but with rye instead of gin. Try it.

928. How the fuck did you know I liked Negronis?

929. Billie told me.

930. Well, I asked her.

931. Is that something a headhunter needs to know

932. about a client these days?

933. Well, you're more interesting than my other clients.

934. Cut the shit. I don't need to be flattered.

935. That's an occupational hazard,

936. and in your case, it's not flattery.

937. So... I came across something today —

938. a job that I think might be your Shangri-La.

939. And they don't use outside headhunters,

940. and I'm not gonna charge you directly if you get the gig.

941. ♪♪♪

942. Do you wanna talk about why you're undervaluing yourself?

943. No.

944. Tell me about the job.

945. It is a blue-chip consulting firm.

946. They do turnarounds from the inside out.

947. And the clients — we're talking innovators, thought leaders,

948. Fortune 500 folks —

949. crazy geniuses that need to be met on their own terms.

950. You want a challenge,

951. this job's gonna require that you seriously up your game.

952. - Huh. - Mm-hmm.

953. ♪♪♪

954. You can play cool if you want,

955. but this façade's not fooling me.

956. You're excited as hell.

957. I'm intrigued.

958. I do have some questions.

959. About the comp? Platinum. State-of-the-art package,

960. comparable to what you're making now.

961. I previewed who you were without naming you,

962. and I know it's yours if you're interested.

963. ♪♪♪

964. It's overwhelming, right? Getting exactly what you want?

965. ♪♪♪

966. That's how I roll.

967. I would insist on paying you a commission.

968. I want to do a nice thing. Let me.

969. I have to do something.

970. You can. Drink up.

971. ♪♪♪

972. ♪♪♪

973. - This is today's downloads.

974. Few conversations.

975. Not what you're looking for... yet.

976. That's what I want to talk about. You know...

977. There's a move. Guys try it so often,

978. we call it the Bojangle.

979. When someone who's been caught, like yourself,

980. agrees to cooperate, then thinks they can string us along,

981. giving us nothing until... what?

982. Maybe you think we'll lose interest or somethin'?

983. Well, that's not gonna happen ever,

984. so don't you try to fucking Bojangle me.

985. "The price of any betrayal always comes due in flesh."

986. What's that? Shakespeare?

987. Stephen King. Gunslinger.

988. But no less true.

989. You're right in recognizing that I... am reluctant.

990. It makes me sick to sell out the man

991. who g-gave me everything...

992. so I can be with my family.

993. So if that's not good enough,

994. you can go fuck yourself!

995. So you tell me,

996. you want me to keep doing what I'm doing?

997. Yeah. Keep it up. We'll be in touch.

998. ♪ tense music ♪

999. - Jeez.

1000. Are you fucking kidding me?

1001. Credible source. Well-developed.

1002. I cannot believe how reckless this is.

1003. Tomorrow, Bryan.

1004. I will hear your complaints tomorrow.

1005. And I will give those complaints

1006. a good, long, loud hearing.

1007. You can bray, and I will listen.

1008. Tomorrow. Tomorrow.

1009. But for now...

1010. Excellent work.

1011. ♪♪♪

1012. Hey. Hey.

1013. Did you, uh, pay the sitter?

1014. Yeah. She left a while ago.

1015. - What'd you do tonight?

1016. Meeting with the, uh,

1017. Federal Judiciary committee at the Bar Association.

1018. - You?

1019. Uh, I had a drink with Billie

1020. and some of the girls from med school.

1021. Guess we know who had more fun tonight.

1022. - Ha. Yeah.

1023. What are those?

1024. Sleeping bags.

1025. Go get sweatshirts and toothbrushes.

1026. Why?

1027. 'Cause you're going on a campout

1028. with the Westport Sound Rangers.

1029. - What? - Mm-hmm.

1030. It's time to learn some outdoor skills.

1031. Camping, fire building, map reading, ropes course.

1032. Some life skills.

1033. Dad.

1034. It's your mother's decision, and I'm behind her.

1035. - Get up.

1036. I canceled your speech at the conference.

1037. Good. Next?

1038. Raul Gomez says he needs to know if he can tell his board

1039. you're clear of charges.

1040. - Call back later.

1041. - You were right.

1042. - It was the girlfriend.

1043. The video makes the whole thing clear.

1044. He was drinking.

1045. He basically admits to driving your kids drunk.

1046. He insults them and you.

1047. We've got the full version now. No one else does.

1048. What'd it cost?

1049. Well within my budget for this type of thing.

1050. Well done.

1051. Now we just need to get it into Mike Dimonda's hands.

1052. Ooh! - All right.

1053. All right, let's get those tents up!

1054. Then we'll assign fire detail, cook up some franks and beans.

1055. ♪ Come along with me... ♪

1056. Hey!

1057. ♪ Got a zebra by the tail and a python in my hand ♪

1058. It's a screen-free, electronics-free time

1059. out here, buddies.

1060. - Sorry. - Hand it over.

1061. ♪ ... was a Texas plain ♪

1062. ♪ But now I swing a lasso on an alien terrain ♪

1063. You have one?

1064. ♪♪♪

1065. All right, then. Hop to!

1066. - Tent's not gonna pitch itself. - ♪ Watusi rodeo ♪

1067. I got your precious, fucking babies home.

1068. What? I will kill you, you motherfucker.

1069. 400,000 hits in less than two hours.

1070. That's beyond viral. That's goddamned virulent.

1071. Well, it's official. This no longer exists in the system.

1072. The full video contained what the police consider to be

1073. an admission of DUI, so your reaction was justifiable.

1074. Just stay off the radar.

1075. Thank you.

1076. There you go.

1077. If you need anything else, you got my number.

1078. Best one yet — "Mothers Against Drunk Driving,

1079. we salute #BobbyAxelrod for doing what needed to be done.

1080. You're an instant goddamn hero.

1081. Your phone is blowing up.

1082. Lawrence Boyd from Spartan-Ives —

1083. "Bobby, share my chopper out to the Hamptons

1084. for Clean Water gala."

1085. - Ooh. - Ooh!

1086. And Raul Gomez — "The police remain behind Axe Cap."

1087. - There we go!

1088. Mm. Get up!

1089. That's gonna fucking cost you.

1090. - Worth it.

1091. Axelrod wins!

1092. Of course.

1093. Well, I said that I would hear you out,

1094. and I will.

1095. Uh, I'm not doing it this way.

1096. Appoint someone else lead counsel.

1097. I got plenty of other cases to deal with.

1098. Now is this because you think my advice

1099. gives you less of a shot at winning?

1100. No. I need to protect my integrity.

1101. I need to run the case if I'm running it.

1102. - Ego.

1103. Bryan Connerty saying, I did it.

1104. I took down Bobby Axelrod.

1105. Not ego. And not alone.

1106. We have more resources

1107. than any governmental prosecutorial division

1108. in the world.

1109. I plan on using them as I see fit.

1110. Sometimes even I lose perspective.

1111. This whole winning and losing thing can do that to you.

1112. I say "I" instead of "we," instead of "the people."

1113. ♪ tense music ♪

1114. And I forget that history won't give a shit

1115. if Chuck Rhoades or Bryan Connerty

1116. won or lost some dipshit case,

1117. And in a hundred years,

1118. that's what they'll all look like,

1119. no matter how big.

1120. ♪♪♪

1121. But taken together as an aggregate,

1122. they matter.

1123. Instead of thinking about how it's gonna feel

1124. hearing a guilty verdict only you brought in,

1125. picture the retirees, the hourly workers.

1126. The innocent timecard-punching factory employees

1127. humping it out of bed every day for their families.

1128. ♪♪♪

1129. Those people put their faith in the American promise —

1130. work hard, get paid what you deserve.

1131. Invest your nest egg, grow it.

1132. Retire with enough to live on.

1133. That is the whole reason —

1134. We're sold the idea that the playing field is level.

1135. But we both know the playing field

1136. is tilted like a craps table in Tombstone, Arizona.

1137. And Bobby Axelrod is the one who is sewing the legs.

1138. ♪♪♪

1139. Every dollar that he takes through fraud,

1140. insider information, market manipulation,

1141. is a dollar taken away from one of those folks

1142. who earned it.

1143. And Axe will do everything

1144. to keep it all going.

1145. And that's why you need me, because I am willing

1146. to stare into the abyss beyond conventional morality

1147. and do what needs to be done

1148. to even that fucking table back up.

1149. ♪♪♪

1150. - Sit in it. - Come on.

1151. Come on.

1152. I want you to. Sit in it.

1153. ♪♪♪

1154. Someday you're gonna be sitting in that chair for real.

1155. And you're gonna remember this moment

1156. and you're gonna understand it in a way

1157. that you couldn't possibly now.

1158. But know this —

1159. this is your case, Bryan.

1160. I'm not letting you walk away from it.

1161. ♪♪♪

1162. So what you have to ask yourself,

1163. the only thing you have to ask yourself is,

1164. can you do a better job standing up for those folks

1165. with me in your corner...

1166. or without me?

1167. ♪♪♪

1168. Now you stay there, right there.

1169. Think about it.

1170. ♪♪♪

1171. I think you're gonna be happy.

1172. ♪♪♪

1173. Hey!

1174. Go!

1175. He's coming! Hey, what the...

1176. - Get in, get in. - He's coming. He's coming.

1177. - Let's go!

1178. - Buckle up. - Yes!

1179. - What the hell?

1180. ♪ Got me a movie, I want you to know ♪

1181. - ♪ Slicing up eyeballs ♪

1182. ♪ I want you to know ♪

1183. ♪ Girlie so groovy... ♪

1184. Smart move, Gordie, holding on to your phone.

1185. ♪ Don't know about you ♪

1186. So you guys hungry? What did they feed you?

1187. - Franks and beans. - It was shit.

1188. - We're starving. - See?

1189. Now you've learned to appreciate what you have.

1190. - And watch your mouth. - Okay.

1191. So... tough night.

1192. ♪ I am un chien... ♪

1193. Wanna get some real food?

1194. I know a diner, great milkshakes.

1195. Yes!

1196. - ♪ Be a debaser ♪ - ♪ Debaser ♪

1197. ♪♪♪

1198. - ♪ Debaser ♪ - ♪ Debaser ♪

1199. ♪♪♪

1200. - ♪ Debaser ♪ - ♪ Debaser ♪

1201. ♪♪♪

1202. - ♪ Debaser ♪ - ♪ Debaser ♪

1203. ♪♪♪

1204. - ♪ Debaser ♪ - ♪ Debaser ♪

1205. ♪♪♪

1206. - ♪ Debaser ♪ - ♪ Debaser ♪

1207. ♪♪♪

1208. ♪ Got me a movie, ha, ha, ha, ho ♪

1209. ♪ Slicing up eyeballs, ha, ha, ha, ho ♪

1210. ♪ Girlie so groovy, ha, ha, ha, ho ♪

1211. ♪ Don't know about you ♪

1212. ♪ But I am un chien andalusia ♪

1213. ♪ I am un chien andalusia ♪

1214. ♪ I am un chien andalusia ♪

1215. ♪ I am un... ♪

1216. Mm.