Billions 1x5

1. Previously on "Billions"...

2. Metallica's playing one North American gig this year.

3. Tonight. Québec.

4. Suspect trading pattern on Pepsum Pharmaceuticals.

5. Peter Decker, Quaker Ridge Financial.

6. At what exact moment did Axelrod instruct you to buy

7. - Pepsum Pharmaceuticals? - He never instructed me.

8. But you believe it was insider trading?

9. If I had to guess, it was probably "Dollar" Bill.

10. I need to see your trades for the past 90 days.

11. Unless you got a Wells notice with my name on it,

12. you're not gonna see jack shit.

13. Get the FBI on him now.

14. I want this motherfucker's genome mapped.

15. Constantine, my old friend.

16. - You showed. - Of course.

17. I have been at Mundia-Tel my entire career.

18. What people thought was bedrock was really bullshit.

19. Now everyone is going to finally see the truth.

20. Why aren't you prosecuting the investment banks

21. and hedge funds for insider trading?

22. Go ask the 81 convicted felons

23. of financial crimes currently serving time.

24. Don't go all Charles Foster Kane on me.

25. - You know I've never seen it. - You have to immediately,

26. projected on a big screen on film.

27. The Statue of Liberty attempted bombing case

28. needs to come off your plate.

29. - I'm sorry? - Eastern needs that case.

30. I've been doing this for two years around the clock.

31. So I came up here to unplug and I, you know, can't.

32. How do you do it, man?

33. Hmm. I play, man.

34. - Sell everything. - Everything?

35. Take it slow, control the bleeding.

36. Then we'll dump sector by sector starting with telecom.

37. - People will think — - That I'm out.

38. ♪♪♪

39. ♪ theme music ♪

40. - Hey, Tito.

41. Morning.

42. - No blemishes.

43. Air cell one-tenth of an inch.

44. Perfect color. It's beautiful.

45. Double yolker. Give me the odds.

46. About one in a thousand. But I got six in a row once.

47. That's quintillion to one.

48. Franchise that fucking hen.

49. - Thanks, Tito. - Of course.

50. Hey, you wanna trade?

51. Sure.

52. - Jesus, Wags.

53. When a guy says sell everything,

54. he gets a chance to take it back.

55. Fair enough. Not gonna.

56. You gotta say it.

57. I already said it.

58. Do it smart, do it so we don't get hurt, but do it.

59. Once we're out of telecom, we get out of tech.

60. Look, if the investors hear about this,

61. they are gonna wonder what the fuck is going on.

62. No, they're not, 'cause you're gonna call 'em and tell 'em.

63. Tell 'em what?

64. Tell 'em that we're shutting down.

65. Give them the heads up. They can start looking elsewhere.

66. And next week? If you change your mind?

67. Well, let's just get through today. Bye.

68. Please tell me that this fine specimen

69. is our line to Bobby Axelrod.

70. He is. We just need to link him to Pepsum.

71. Then we'll flip him against Axelrod.

72. Mm. How is his, uh, personal life?

73. Dude, it's too perfect.

74. "Dollar" Bill Stearn — devoted family man.

75. - Sunday school teacher. - Volunteer fireman.

76. Wow, I'm gettin' all weepy-eyed.

77. - Guess we gotta let him go.

78. - It hasn't even been a week. - A week we got nothing.

79. - We do have a theory. - Finally! Thank you.

80. - It's not fully worked out yet. - But what Dale is referring to

81. is, uh, Bill Stearn bribed

82. the Pepsum researcher for proprietary information

83. on a drug called Vaccarizine.

84. It's an enzyme they've been testing out in Iowa.

85. Genetically modifies corn so that cows can actually digest

86. - without antibiotics and — - It makes them shit better.

87. I'm sorry, but does this, uh, farm report

88. wind up anywhere near an arrest warrant?

89. Well, we think that there is a nexus

90. between Stearn and the guys who ran the test.

91. We have to just place Stearn in Iowa

92. - at the right time — - So no.

93. Don't tell him part of the story

94. until you know the whole story.

95. - Got it. All right.

96. Let's go through these bank records.

97. - Mm. Um... - Yeah, what's up?

98. You still keep emergency deodorant

99. - in your office? - Yeah, you need some?

100. No.

101. Grandma's recipe.

102. Signature dish at the Empire Diner.

103. I thought Grandma was a waitress.

104. She knew her way around a griddle, too.

105. Gotta use enough cinnamon.

106. - Am I out of a job? - Don't worry, Ryan.

107. Breakfast is about all I can handle.

108. Yeah, trust me. We need you back.

109. Wow! Ryan, take the morning off.

110. - Be back for lunch? - You got it.

111. - Thanks.

112. Family announcement.

113. New boat's coming early.

114. - The big one? - Wow.

115. Delivery on Friday afternoon.

116. Great. Thinking Europe, end of summer?

117. Mediterranean Milk Run? Nah.

118. Can we go to the Galápagos to meet Lonesome George?

119. Lonesome George is dead.

120. Really? Oh, shit.

121. Hey. Language.

122. Galápagos?

123. Galápagos. Nice.

124. - How much sooner?

125. - How 'bout next week?

126. Yeah, we can.

127. If that's the thing to do right now.

128. Well, you know, I was just thinking,

129. boys will be out of school. Perfect time in their lives.

130. Well, maybe it's not the perfect time in my life.

131. Summer at the restaurant, it's gonna be insane.

132. All right, I get that.

133. So we'll set something up so you can stay in touch.

134. Videos. You can take trips home.

135. "We."

136. Did I miss us having a conversation

137. about this somehow?

138. We bought the boat together. We designed it together.

139. Yeah, but we skipped the part when we talk

140. about when and how we're using it.

141. You hate this idea?

142. No, I don't, 'cause I see how much you love it.

143. And I get why it would be a once-in-a-lifetime for them.

144. - I'm just...

145. trying it on for a sec.

146. Good. Okay, do that. Then let's go. It hit me.

147. Why work so hard if not to do what we want, when we want?

148. ♪ pensive music ♪

149. I might've misheard earlier,

150. but, um, did you call the US Attorney "dude"?

151. - Sorry? - Back there.

152. I think you might've said something like,

153. "Dude, it's perfect," to the US Attorney.

154. I don't think I said "dude."

155. I don't even remember saying "it's perfect."

156. - Just repeating what I heard. - I'm not doubting you.

157. I just mean, I don't think...

158. I mean... no.

159. Yeah, I'm being a friend here.

160. Wow, did I actually say "dude"?

161. - Yeah. Mm-hmm. - I did. I said it.

162. The vibe at the law firm I was at before joining the Bureau

163. was serious but relaxed.

164. Okay, well, this is serious but serious.

165. - Remove it from your vocabulary. - I will. Stat.

166. No, I see.

167. Who — who keeps a year's rent in the bank?

168. I've never missed a payment, never been late at...

169. No, I don't. I don't have a guarantor.

170. Then w-why show me the apartment at all?

171. Just hold the place one more day, please.

172. Thank you.

173. I could do it.

174. Be your guarantor.

175. Don't listen to my calls.

176. Don't leave your door open.

177. How is...

178. Look, thanks, but I wouldn't take your parents' money

179. even if it wasn't against the rules here.

180. You're not taking anything if you don't default.

181. You gonna default?

182. No.

183. You could think about it.

184. We could ask for a waiver or something.

185. And, uh, it's my money.

186. They gave it to me when I turned 25.

187. So...

188. I was up till 4 a.m. this morning.

189. I was watching videos of BASE jumpers.

190. There was this guy —

191. he just sails from mountain to mountain in Yosemite.

192. It's incredible. He just...

193. He just takes flight.

194. Soars over the valleys.

195. He's weightless, utterly free.

196. I wanna feel what that's like just once in my life,

197. like I'm saying "fuck you" to gravity.

198. Didn't that guy die?

199. - Yeah.

200. Yeah, but, I mean, he wanted to.

201. I gotta go.

202. Come on. Play hooky with me.

203. I can't. I'm handling lunch.

204. And I gotta make arrangements for the restaurant.

205. I can't just disappear.

206. You sure you're ready to do this?

207. I didn't mean to surprise you.

208. Yeah, you did, or you wouldn't have.

209. You don't get carried away.

210. But I know you wanted it to be a good surprise.

211. And it is, once I started getting used to it.

212. But I do still have to go set up for it.

213. Okay. Go.

214. - I'll amuse myself.

215. Just don't go jumping off any cliffs.

216. I won't.

217. Maybe I'll watch a movie.

218. Inglourious Basterds again?

219. No.

220. I've never seen Citizen Kane,

221. projected, the way you're supposed to.

222. Perfect. I'll make a call.

223. So what do we got on the, uh, researcher?

224. Clayton Grunwald.

225. Farmer, agricultural scientist for Pepsum for 20 years.

226. One-income household, about 70K, no travel records,

227. no trace of Stearn in Iowa,

228. but I don't buy a relationship like this blooming via phone.

229. Maybe a conference somewhere?

230. - Neutral territory? - Nothing.

231. Then Iowa. Stearn covered his tracks.

232. Didn't fly, paid only cash.

233. Maybe we pay the farmer a visit.

234. What, with nothing? No, no. We — we gotta come heavy.

235. Otherwise, the guy says jack shit or he —

236. he just lawyers up.

237. All right.

238. What do cheap guys do?

239. Don't look at me. I treat my queen very well.

240. They go dutch. Every fuckin' time.

241. Just to be clear... we're frozen?

242. We're not buying, for now.

243. Not Carthill. Don't fuck me like that.

244. It's a Hondo Havlicek. Can't miss.

245. It is bad timing, I know. But keep on liquidating.

246. We were up north of the timberline.

247. Why are we bailing?

248. We're not bailing.

249. We're pruning, slowly, so we don't scare the market.

250. And keep this on the fucking DL.

251. We need to be deliberate and delicate about this.

252. Bonsai artists.

253. Since when do we do delicate?

254. Since now.

255. Do we know how long?

256. As long as he wants, Carly.

257. I gotta say, I'm not feeling this strategy.

258. Well, then it's a good thing

259. your feelings aren't a fucking priority.

260. Thank you for your time.

261. Dale.

262. I need you to do something for me.

263. Yes, sir.

264. Somewhere between "sir" and "dude," okay?

265. Yeah.

266. I need you to find a woman named Martina Slovis.

267. - S-L-O-V-I-S. Martina Slovis.

268. She used to live in Cobble Hill.

269. - Dropped out of Brooklyn Law.

270. And this is only for me. Got it?

271. You know I do.

272. - Hey. - Hmm?

273. We got it.

274. We ran down everything this guy ever signed

275. or signed up for, and on April 25,

276. William Stearn's Silver Elite card

277. was logged into the Downtown Marriott

278. in Des Moines, Iowa.

279. Now he paid cash for the hotel room,

280. but he couldn't turn down the reward points.

281. Every man is a junkie for something.

282. Find it, find him, and you did.

283. - Yeah. - Excellent.

284. Here's our researcher.

285. Clayton Grunwald.

286. We're heading to Iowa to jump him.

287. Aiming to have an affidavit in your hands by Friday.

288. - Yeah. - Hmm.

289. Christ.

290. Hello, Chuck.

291. I'm sorry. We had a sit-down scheduled.

292. - Can we talk? - It's okay.

293. - You want him here? - What have I got to hide?

294. Is it true you've launched

295. a full-scale investigation of Axe Capital?

296. I'm not gonna answer that, and you know it.

297. You have heard the rumors that Axe Capital is shuttering?

298. The word is they're pulling their positions.

299. Hey, Dimonda, my office just charged 17 people

300. in a massive heroin conspiracy in Rockland County,

301. sent a corrupt mayor to prison, and indicted a serial killer.

302. Incredible stories I bet the American people

303. are dying to read about.

304. ♪ tense music ♪

305. What the fuck?

306. Hey, p-pulling positions? You — you knew about this?

307. No. Get Sacker to call her hedgie friends.

308. Find out if he's really closing down.

309. You got it.

310. ♪♪♪

311. - Hey, babe. - Uh, hey.

312. Um... which one of us has, uh, softball duty tonight?

313. Mm, it's your turn, I thought.

314. Right, right. Sorry.

315. So much bullshit I'm dealing with here, I lost track.

316. How 'bout you? How are things?

317. At work?

318. Yeah, wherever.

319. Everything's great.

320. Great.

321. I'm about to start a session. I'll call you back, okay?

322. - Okay. Love ya.

323. He's still not back.

324. This is not good.

325. Well... we've been here before.

326. No, we actually haven't.

327. He wants me to tell our top investors

328. we're winding down.

329. Okay.

330. I don't know what the fuck is going on,

331. but this isn't burnout.

332. This isn't, "I gotta go play the Scottish courses"

333. or run away for a week to basketball fantasy camp.

334. This is some kind of bullshit midlife meltdown.

335. Whatever it is, it's not bullshit.

336. For most of human history, we all would've been dead by now.

337. We get to this age and we think,

338. "What the fuck am I still doing here?"

339. It's disorienting.

340. See, that's what he needs — some of that black magic.

341. - Go talk to him. - No, it's only been a few days.

342. He's still processing it himself. What do the PMs know?

343. That I need them to close down the positions,

344. not stampede the fuck out of the corral.

345. But they're instinctive creatures,

346. and without knowing exactly why, they feel antsy,

347. which leads them to feeling restless,

348. which leads to motherfucking anarchy if we don't rein it in.

349. What do I do about the investors?

350. Have Axe talk to them... himself.

351. Make it real for him.

352. - Fund is frozen, Axe AWOL.

353. And a couple of junior traders

354. just had a 3-hour lunch at LeFarm.

355. Quick work.

356. Just a couple texts. People are talking.

357. Yeah, because you know how to get 'em talking.

358. Don't poor mouth yourself.

359. We should, uh, get surveillance up on Axelrod.

360. - Uh-huh. I already told the FBI

361. to be standing by in anticipation of your order.

362. I'll confirm.

363. What the hell is his strategy?

364. He knows we're not gonna give up the hunt just because he closes.

365. Maybe he wants to quit while he's ahead.

366. No one quits while they're ahead.

367. This isn't France. It's America.

368. We think noblesse oblige is a new entrée at Olive Garden.

369. You know, there's a book that could help you with that.

370. - Sarno? It didn't.

371. You have to actually read it for it to help.

372. Mm-hmm. I'm not supposed to just shove it up my ass?

373. - How solid is your Iowa linkage?

374. Solid.

375. But he has to talk for it to pay off. I'm on it.

376. I'm tagging along.

377. What?

378. Lot of firepower for one farmer.

379. Research scientist.

380. - So...

381. Why do you have to go?

382. Excuse me?

383. I don't wanna be out of line,

384. but at some point, you might want

385. to consider recusing yourself from this case.

386. The conflict of interest is — eventually, it's...

387. it's gonna be an issue. So...

388. Well...

389. as long as you don't want to be out of line.

390. ♪ tense music ♪

391. Make sure it's an aisle seat.

392. How many times you seen it?

393. This'll be my first.

394. Oh, my God. You're in for such a treat.

395. "You know, Mr. Bernstein,

396. if I hadn't been very rich,

397. I might've been a really great man."

398. Wags, man. What are you doing here?

399. Apologies for violating the restraining order

400. and entering Xanadu,

401. but I got a pile of documents for you to sign.

402. - Barry, clear the booth.

403. Go swimming or something.

404. You either appoint an independent custodian

405. to handle the final audit or —

406. You give those to the accountants or the lawyers.

407. - You handle the investors. - I will.

408. But you and I both know there are certain ones

409. who deserve a sit-down with you.

410. This is why you're here?

411. Alex Collins.

412. First person to put $10 mil into the fund.

413. Jesus, when did you become such a hoarder?

414. Frances Kingsley. Buchanan University.

415. - I get the point. - And finally...

416. Raul Gomez.

417. New York City Police Pension Fund.

418. Shit.

419. Gomez was a game-changer.

420. He was the first real player who saw what we knew we had.

421. What a great day that was.

422. If there is a reason for all of this —

423. a professional one —

424. you know I am the one guy you can tell.

425. It'll help me to backstop. There was —

426. Hey. Thanks for coming.

427. - You're gonna make those calls. - I heard you the first time.

428. This just won.

429. Okay, basketball. You like basketball?

430. Yeah.

431. One for you. Okay, here's 20 for you.

432. It runs out, we go home.

433. Okay? I'm gonna be over here at Shoot Out the Star. Okay?

434. - Okay. - All right.

435. ♪♪♪

436. Start.

437. Take a turn.

438. One play, please. Keep the change.

439. FBI across the way.

440. We've got about 30 seconds.

441. Fuck. I thought there was something about that guy.

442. I couldn't be sure, but... it felt wrong.

443. They're getting desperate, or they're getting closer.

444. I'm disappearing for a while. Family trip.

445. Yeah? Good timing.

446. You trust the guys between you and Decker?

447. - Sure.

448. Though it's hard to know how a guy will react

449. once he's getting his fingernails torn out.

450. - If anybody can vouch for that,

451. - I'm your guy.

452. We're all made of the same thing —

453. nerves, sinew, the levers, the pulleys.

454. Once someone's opened up, the same thing always happens,

455. eventually.

456. You freak me out sometimes.

457. That doesn't count.

458. - I know.

459. - Hey there, Mr. Nice.

460. Stop that.

461. He'll lick you in about two seconds.

462. Mr. Nice, huh? Love the name. What is he?

463. - Purebred mutt. Come here.

464. Come here, you. Come here, you.

465. Ohh. Yes, you're a pretty dog. Huh?

466. - Very, very pretty. Beautiful.

467. I don't know.

468. Looks like he's got a little shepherd in him.

469. Chuck Rhoades.

470. US Attorney for the Southern District of New York.

471. Clayton Grunwald.

472. You mind inviting us up to the house?

473. - Uh... - Special Agent Terri McCue, FBI.

474. - Aw, hell. - Yeah.

475. Met Bill at a conference a few years ago.

476. Liked him right away.

477. His father was a farmer, so we had a lot in common.

478. He knows what it's like to wake with the sun,

479. tend the animals, live off what you raise.

480. His father was a shoe salesman...

481. in Philadelphia.

482. ♪ tense music ♪

483. W-well, he talked like a farmer, knew his stuff.

484. ♪♪♪

485. We became friends and, uh...

486. And he helped you out.

487. Yep, he did. He helped us out.

488. He showed real kindness to our family.

489. We just closed out Christina's college fund

490. to pay her medical bills.

491. He offered to take care of the surgeries.

492. The best doctors, private air ambulance.

493. Even found us a CF support group.

494. We figured God had decided to send us a miracle.

495. So you gave him the information.

496. Yeah. Yes.

497. It just kinda slipped out.

498. I was talking to a friend.

499. Didn't seem like such a big deal.

500. I mean, I-I realized I had a duty to the company,

501. but I figured, how much difference could it make?

502. About $89 million worth, Clayton.

503. - Shit.

504. I'm sorry. Should he have a lawyer for this part?

505. Well, if you would like a lawyer, Kelly, then, uh, yes.

506. - You can call one. - Okay.

507. And then, uh, we can arrest your husband

508. and finish this as an interrogation.

509. I-I don't, uh...

510. See, right now,

511. this seems like sort of a friendly conversation,

512. but it's not, really,

513. because we all know that it could turn hard

514. in a different direction.

515. And, uh, there's days that I would push it there.

516. But... I like it out here,

517. and the two of you.

518. So give me what I need to arrest who I really need to arrest,

519. and I will do everything I can

520. to make sure that Clayton's around

521. for Christina's high school graduation.

522. ♪♪♪

523. Sounds like a good deal to me.

524. So this states that on October 27th,

525. you gave William Stearn the confidential results

526. of the Pepsum GMO Vaccarizine corn trial

527. a full 24 hours before it was made public.

528. Yes, sir.

529. I need your signature up here.

530. I'll be in touch in a few weeks about your arraignment.

531. Uh, contact a lawyer before you come

532. or one will be appointed for you.

533. Wait, you said that if we cooperated,

534. that Clayton wouldn't go to jail.

535. I said that I would do everything I could to help.

536. You will be entering into

537. a deferred prosecution agreement.

538. I-I would've called our lawyer if you'd made that clear.

539. Christina needs us. She needs both of us here.

540. You have no idea how hard this has been on our family.

541. I can't do this all by myself.

542. You crushed 'em. You destroyed 'em.

543. - Well, wanna grab a bite? - Uh, no, thank you.

544. I got some stuff to take care of and dinner with the governor.

545. - Right, because it's Iowa. - Yeah.

546. ♪♪♪

547. Barry, hold it.

548. How's the wind-down going?

549. It's going.

550. I need to know everything's dumped

551. before I get on that boat.

552. We'll be out of telecom by tomorrow,

553. and we'll have already started off-loading tech.

554. Then we'll go another 5% across the board.

555. By the third day of not buying,

556. the Street is gonna think you're crazy, I might add.

557. I can live with that. Let 'em think what they wanna think.

558. - Yeah, I will. - Okay, bye.

559. More hot sauce. Thanks.

560. Hey, Lonnie.

561. Oh, Dimonda. Hey.

562. I didn't know this was your beat.

563. Yeah, I live right up the street. Cobble Hill.

564. Oh. Thanks.

565. Fine dining, US Attorney style.

566. Yeah, not really a lot of options out here.

567. I'll show you sometime.

568. Brooklyn is Paris now, if you know where to look.

569. But this is a, uh, strange land to you, right?

570. You're from the Upper West?

571. What a shitty commute.

572. To the Eastern District, no less?

573. That's like getting traded from the Pats to the Titans.

574. - Okay, we're done.

575. No, just starting. So you got your big case yanked?

576. Friend at Davis Polk said you interviewed there last week.

577. You unhappy working under Chuck?

578. I have nothing but the utmost respect for the US Attorney.

579. I'm writing a piece on the exodus

580. of assistant US attorneys into the private sector.

581. Right now, you're my lede, and I was wondering—

582. If you fuck me by writing this story,

583. there's not an AUSA in the world who'll take your call.

584. Look, I don't wanna print it.

585. I'm working on a better Chuck Rhoades story,

586. one that doesn't involve you.

587. I'm just having problems nailing down a background source.

588. Maybe you'd be willing to help me out?

589. What kind of story?

590. Let's take a seat.

591. - Come on, Bryan.

592. Come on. Come on.

593. - Boom.

594. That was brutal.

595. Yep, 'cause I'm awesome.

596. I should suck at bar sports

597. because I... was always studying.

598. Yeah, but apparently, you — you don't suck at anything.

599. You haven't even seen what I'm best at yet.

600. Ohh. Snapchat me.

601. Where's Terri? Is she, uh...

602. up at your hotel room or...

603. Oh!

604. - Fuck.

605. I am a little tipsy.

606. Me, too. Come on, is it — is it really that obvious?

607. - Mm. - It's — it's casual.

608. I thought we were doing a good job

609. of keeping things professional.

610. Oh, absolutely. You are.

611. But she also told me you were really good in bed.

612. - Hey. - Oh, hey.

613. - Hey. - There's our girl.

614. - You wanna sit down? - Nah.

615. No. Can I get — I can get you a drink.

616. Mnh.

617. Thought I'd just... head up.

618. ♪♪♪

619. You?

620. Yeah, I guess. Me, too. Me, also.

621. - Okay. - Yes. Good night.

622. - See ya. - Later.

623. ♪♪♪

624. Hey.

625. Have a fantastic night, you guys.

626. My jacket. It's on the chair again.

627. ♪♪♪

628. ♪♪♪

629. ♪ tense music ♪

630. ♪♪♪

631. ♪♪♪

632. ♪♪♪

633. You're still here?

634. Wow. I guess neither of you are cuddlers, huh?

635. - Just...

636. knock it out and move on. Okay.

637. - Not what I was picturing.

638. I mean, I wasn't picturing any— I don't picture things.

639. I wasn't even thinking about it.

640. - Okay, can we not — - Yep. Let's definitely not.

641. Excuse me, hi. Can I get one more and then the check?

642. - Mm-hmm. Two, thanks.

643. You got it.

644. ♪♪♪

645. - What?

646. I was thinking about...

647. your offer to guarantee my lease.

648. Mm.

649. Couldn't happen at the office. Regs.

650. It feels weird, anyway. I'm keeping my old apartment.

651. Why weird?

652. I don't wanna feel beholden to you.

653. I loan my friends money all the time.

654. And this isn't even a loan that I'm offering.

655. It's a signature. And I've forgotten it already.

656. ♪♪♪

657. Only people with money forget about money.

658. - Thanks. - Thank you.

659. No rush.

660. Whoa, whoa, whoa. I got it.

661. Thought you always went dutch.

662. Well, next time, you can pay.

663. Maybe at Lugers after you... sign a 7-figure deal

664. to Sullivan, Cromwell.

665. What's that mean?

666. - You're brilliant. - Uh...

667. Top of your class, Stanford Law.

668. You're gonna put in your five years,

669. and then you're gonna defect to the other side,

670. start defending the same rich jerkoffs

671. you're locking up now.

672. Not a judgment. Just a truth of our world.

673. Not my world.

674. I am an Aquarius on a trust fund.

675. No, I am riding this job all the way to higher office.

676. Okay, Senator Sacker.

677. That's a first step.

678. To what? Governor?

679. ♪♪♪

680. Oh, Madam Secretary, huh?

681. ♪♪♪

682. Wait, POTUS?

683. Not confirming. Not denying.

684. Nobody plans that at your age.

685. Nobody who gets there doesn't.

686. What, you think Clinton saved

687. that picture with Kennedy by accident?

688. Okay.

689. Okay, your administration.

690. Way down the road, but modeling it on Roosevelt.

691. FDR.

692. No. Teddy.

693. Um, solid economy policy, progressive.

694. You know, I can forgive his flaws

695. because just like every one of us,

696. he was a product of his time.

697. Plus, he wrote one of my favorite books.

698. Mm. Rough Riders.

699. Mm, that one's fine.

700. I'm talking The Naval War of 1812.

701. ♪♪♪

702. Also good.

703. ♪♪♪

704. I should probably head back to my room.

705. A 4 a.m. wake-up, yeah?

706. I gotta — gotta wait for the check.

707. - Mm-hmm.

708. And then I'll... go.

709. Oh, uh, if your game stays tight,

710. I'll keep you in mind for Attorney General.

711. - Good night.

712. - Good night. - Mm-hmm.

713. ♪♪♪

714. Hi, baby.

715. Chuck?

716. I'm outside a club again.

717. I don't know how I ended up here.

718. I'm listening.

719. I feel so out of control, Wendy.

720. You wanna go inside?

721. Oh, fuck, yes.

722. Me, too.

723. ♪ dramatic music ♪

724. Take me with you.

725. Okay.

726. Hold on, okay?

727. ♪♪♪

728. ♪♪♪

729. ♪♪♪

730. You with me?

731. What do you see?

732. ♪♪♪

733. - There's a... woman.

734. Is she hot?

735. Yeah.

736. - And the man is...

737. pathetic. He's completely in her power.

738. Fucking worm.

739. Yeah.

740. Get on your hands and knees.

741. Oh, the floor is so—

742. On your fucking knees now.

743. Okay.

744. Shit.

745. It's a hard floor.

746. Good.

747. I'm gonna leave you there for a while.

748. - Ohh. All these sharp heels.

749. Mmm.

750. Are you touching yourself?

751. May I?

752. No.

753. Not until I give you permission.

754. Okay.

755. ♪♪♪

756. ♪♪♪

757. - Oh! Look at... - Ohh!

758. Yeah, good shot.

759. Three fucking days of this bullshit.

760. I'm gonna murder someone.

761. Yeah, well, if this continues, fuck it.

762. You and I set up shop.

763. I got the contacts, the ideas, the killer instinct.

764. You're not just a solid earner. You know what else you are?

765. - Results-oriented. - I'm sitting right here, dick.

766. - Ooh!

767. - All right.

768. I figured you'd want to go off on your own.

769. Why didn't I save any money?

770. Fucking Hamptons rental, Europe, shoes. A closet of shoes.

771. I have $250,000 in fucking shoes.

772. Are we doing this? - Oh!

773. Get in on the action! I'm taking odds!

774. I got $200 says he can make it.

775. I got five says he doesn't.

776. How are the troops holding up?

777. Like we're on a fucking Higgins boat

778. heading straight for Omaha beach.

779. Where is he? - You know as much as I do.

780. Dealbreaker had a blind item about him.

781. Says it's temporary insanity.

782. Who said anything about temporary?

783. We all know he's not insane. We gotta just...

784. enjoy the break.

785. This can be useful,

786. remind us why we love what we do.

787. Uh, I love what I make... or used to.

788. Sure. Money's a big part of it.

789. You remember the first year you pulled down seven figures?

790. - Yeah, of course. What'd you do with it?

791. Spend it on yourself? Buy something for your families?

792. I bought my mom a washing machine.

793. - What the fuck?

794. She was doing laundry by hand. It's hard on the joints.

795. Yeah, so you buy her a house with a maid,

796. not an appliance from Sears, you cheap fuck.

797. - What about you, Pouch?

798. I put it all into retirement.

799. Oh, you pussy.

800. And I staked a couple of fighters, which was a mistake.

801. Yeah, well, I got a quick 5K you can make

802. if you got the stomach for it.

803. Ah, behold, the Hand of the King

804. descends to walk among the rabble.

805. Hey, Wags, two of my kids just got hired at Morgan Capital.

806. Hmm. Funny you're complaining to me,

807. considering they're your kids.

808. I'm ready.

809. Aw, yeah! - It's time!

810. Final bets in, everyone.

811. Jonesy, Jonesy, Jonesy, Jonesy, Jonesy...

812. And... go.

813. Jonesy, Jonesy, Jonesy, Jonesy, Jonesy!

814. ♪ punk music ♪

815. ♪♪♪

816. A couple more days,

817. it'll be fucking Lord of the Flies in here.

818. ♪♪♪

819. I think it's time for one of

820. your offsite team building exercises.

821. ♪♪♪

822. Yo, bitches, saddle up.

823. Body sushi at the strip joint, on me.

824. Yeah!

825. ♪ tense music ♪

826. ♪♪♪

827. - Hi. - Hi.

828. I was hoping you'd come by.

829. - Come on in. - Thanks.

830. - So how's the restaurant?

831. Oh, you gotta come for dinner.

832. Lu will treat you to a tasting menu.

833. And bring the family.

834. - Oh. - Or, you know...

835. maybe just the kids.

836. This isn't fun... for any of us.

837. You trust me on that, right?

838. Of course.

839. ♪♪♪

840. So where's the man?

841. Screening room.

842. Okay.

843. Are we good to move on Bill Stearn

844. by end of next week?

845. Mm. Already laying the groundwork.

846. - This is delicious. - Yeah.

847. - Yonah's? - Mm-hmm.

848. The poor guy.

849. His brother opens a rival cart right next door.

850. - Hmm. - Same knish, 50 cents cheaper.

851. You didn't.

852. No. My God, I'm loyal.

853. - Yeah?

854. I have Agent Christo on the line.

855. Dale?

856. Mr. Rhoades, your wife's here.

857. What? Where?

858. Axelrod's house. Entered about two minutes ago.

859. Alone.

860. Axelrod's wife there, too?

861. Not anymore.

862. You like?

863. This is as far as I've gotten.

864. Barry, can you hit the lights, please?

865. Thanks for coming.

866. Thanks for not making me go all the way to Scotland this time.

867. That was your decision.

868. You didn't leave me a choice.

869. There's always a choice.

870. So...

871. Last time it took, what?

872. Five days, 72 holes a day,

873. then you broke 80 and could finally see the market.

874. What's it gonna take this time?

875. This isn't that.

876. It's different.

877. ♪ tense music ♪

878. You have any idea what they're doing in there, Dale?

879. I'm sorry, sir. I can't tell.

880. Can you get a closer look?

881. Um... no.

882. No, I can't, sir. The risk will compromise us.

883. Yeah, okay. Thanks, Dale. Thank you.

884. Uh... stand by.

885. Keep me posted minute by minute, yeah?

886. - Okay.

887. I think it's time to get a wire up on Axelrod.

888. Maybe some video, too.

889. You'll sign the warrant applications?

890. Of course.

891. Yeah, why don't we, um,

892. order some drones while we're at it?

893. ♪♪♪

894. Great idea.

895. ♪♪♪

896. Gonna be tough, boss.

897. Axelrod has round-the-clock security.

898. Rumor is they do random bug sweeps.

899. Since Dale's been on him,

900. we've never seen the house empty once.

901. What's your point, Bryan?

902. I know this is a touchy subject, but for your own sake,

903. this brings us back to the subject of recusal.

904. I think you should reconsider.

905. - And I think that you

906. should stop fucking the help.

907. Still nothing.

908. No movement. She's still in there.

909. ♪♪♪

910. So when are you leaving?

911. Next week.

912. New yacht's arriving this afternoon.

913. Most beautiful boat you have ever seen.

914. Designed every inch of it ourselves.

915. Last year, we went to visit it at the shipyard in Estonia.

916. We're gonna sail it down to the Galápagos, Buenos Aires.

917. Who knows where else? Everywhere.

918. When I was at Metallica, I just had this feeling —

919. it was so brief — that there was

920. some other kind of life I could be living.

921. In each of us,

922. there is another self we do not know.

923. What's your other self?

924. Professional soccer player.

925. Well, no. No, no, no.

926. You know what my first dream was?

927. Famous Broadway dancer.

928. You got the legs for it.

929. Mm.

930. Look...

931. if you wanna do this, go ahead.

932. But don't just slide into it. Make a decision.

933. - I have. - Then tell your people.

934. Don't make Wags do it.

935. You owe them that respect.

936. Uh, little problem.

937. How little?

938. Well, uh, an FJ article is about to drop by Michael Dimonda.

939. It's not flattering.

940. - All right, what does it say?

941. Well, um...

942. Oh, for Christ's sake, rip the Band-Aid off. Come on.

943. It says that you're investigating Axe Capital.

944. And how is that a problem? Of course that was gonna leak.

945. Well, it also says that you're hesitating

946. on pulling the trigger because of a family conflict.

947. Uh-huh.

948. Like preferential treatment, because your wife works —

949. Yes, I got it. Thank you.

950. How is it sourced?

951. Someone inside the office, senior official, highly placed.

952. How do you know it's a senior official?

953. Because it quotes a senior official

954. familiar with the matter.

955. Okay. I see.

956. Very good. Thank you.

957. You've reached Wendy Rhoades. Please leave a message.

958. Can't say that I'm happy right now,

959. but I do want to thank you for meeting with me in person.

960. Of course.

961. Taking on the Police Fund as a client

962. was one of the proudest moments of my life.

963. You know, Lara comes from three generations of cops.

964. - Her grandpa walked a beat on — - Bushwick.

965. Of course I know.

966. I deeply appreciate you taking a flyer on us back then,

967. when no one else would.

968. You were a cocky prick with terrible table manners,

969. but I knew there was something.

970. I didn't keep my money at Axe Cap because I like you.

971. If you pull up stakes,

972. you're handing me a $1.5 billion problem.

973. Time comes, I'll find you another fund.

974. Like who? Rangewater?

975. Yeah, for example. Solid returns. Smart guys.

976. Overleveraged, though.

977. - Then PKZ. - No way.

978. They have no idea how to manage risk. None.

979. No fucking clue how to short.

980. Bear market, you're paying 2% to underperform Vanguard.

981. So you're starting to see the problem.

982. Picking a fund's not that different from picking a stock.

983. I'll find you a winner.

984. ♪♪♪

985. First Solar.

986. Late July 2007.

987. No. No, you're not making me do this again.

988. As long as I'm an investor in this company, I'll —

989. Okay. Okay.

990. 2007, mid-July.

991. Broke out in good volume. Went up to around 120.

992. We were out of the sector till August.

993. We left millions on the table. That was on me.

994. Google. Mid-June 2004.

995. That's a trick question. Didn't go public till August.

996. IPO'd $19.6 mil shares at 84.

997. Closed at $100.34.

998. It was a good day for both of us.

999. Cyberonics.

1000. August 2004.

1001. Started mid-20s, went to 40s.

1002. Then the FDA dinged its nerve stimulator,

1003. and the stock tanked at 13. We saw it coming.

1004. Everyone else was trying to catch a falling knife.

1005. We made $7.4 mil that day.

1006. How'd I do?

1007. How the hell would I know?

1008. I remember I gave you a quiz like that the first time we met.

1009. And it wasn't the fact that you knew so much.

1010. It was how you lit up.

1011. These companies are living organisms to you.

1012. And I knew that if I gave you my money,

1013. that you wouldn't sleep

1014. until you put it in all the right places.

1015. You would do whatever you had to

1016. and wouldn't care what it looked like.

1017. That's who I needed looking after my cops,

1018. who I still need.

1019. ♪♪♪

1020. And in case you can't tell anymore,

1021. you still lit up.

1022. Hey, sweetheart.

1023. - Oh.

1024. - I'm sorry. What did you say?

1025. What's the noise? Uh, are you at work?

1026. No. I bailed. It was slow.

1027. Well, that's a first. Where are you?

1028. About to do something crazy —

1029. sneaking into a show at intermission.

1030. Which one?

1031. "On the Town."

1032. I haven't second-acted a musical since college.

1033. Oh, I gotta go. They're ringing the bell.

1034. Okay, so you're not heading back to, uh, to the office today?

1035. - No. - Good.

1036. Okay. I'll talk to you soon.

1037. Bye.

1038. Yeah, get the arrest warrant.

1039. Yes, I also thought it was a seven to ten-day horizon.

1040. Now it's a now horizon.

1041. ♪ uplifting music ♪

1042. ♪♪♪

1043. She's some tub.

1044. How the hell do I get me one of those?

1045. You like the stock market?

1046. Hey, I could if you're offering me a job.

1047. Yeah.

1048. I'm sorry. I'm getting out of the game.

1049. Good for you, son. Game's overrated.

1050. Man, what I wouldn't give to be your age,

1051. plenty in the tank and in my pocket,

1052. the open water in front of me.

1053. So... ready to board?

1054. Hold on a second.

1055. ♪ tense music ♪

1056. Excuse me.

1057. All right. Let's get going, guys.

1058. ♪♪♪

1059. How's my hair?

1060. Spiffy.

1061. ♪♪♪

1062. ♪♪♪

1063. - Do you believe this shit?

1064. The CEO of Mundia-Tel

1065. and office presidents in six countries

1066. caught cooking the books.

1067. Company's fucking bankrupt.

1068. Stocks tanked 89% already.

1069. They're talking about suspending trading.

1070. Whole sector's swirling down the cesspool.

1071. The whole market is going with it.

1072. Good thing we were out.

1073. Yeah. It sure fucking is.

1074. - A-again? - I thought I got it all out.

1075. that body sushi.

1076. Raw fish off a stripper.

1077. ♪♪♪

1078. Just remember, be polite. Keep your weapons holstered.

1079. Got it. All right, guys, let's go.

1080. ♪♪♪

1081. You fucking genius.

1082. Where is everybody? They quit already?

1083. Bathroom, mostly.

1084. Body sushi at the strip joint.

1085. You didn't partake?

1086. I've built up a tolerance.

1087. How did you know about Mundia-Tel?

1088. Fucking bellwether.

1089. When it went babaloo, it sucked the whole sector

1090. down the dumpers with it.

1091. Of course, we were out of telecom completely,

1092. and you hid it under some rumor

1093. of your midlife crisis or whatever?

1094. Couldn't afford to get caught in a race for the exits.

1095. As long as the rest of them thought I'd lost it,

1096. they wouldn't follow.

1097. I was starting to get nervous it was real.

1098. Holy shit.

1099. It was real?

1100. For a minute there.

1101. More than a minute.

1102. Felt like... freedom, you know?

1103. Like I could taste it.

1104. The Galápagos?

1105. I almost got on my boat today and didn't get back off.

1106. Why didn't you?

1107. Because I fucking love this place.

1108. I love what I do. I love what we do.

1109. We gotta be ready to push back in hard,

1110. tomorrow or the next day, after the market correction.

1111. We lever up again...

1112. ♪ tense music ♪

1113. Call Orrin Bach. Call Lara.

1114. FBI. Move away from your computers.

1115. - We have a warrant

1116. from a federal court.

1117. Please stay in your seats and let us do our job.

1118. Thank you for your cooperation. You. Get up.

1119. Yeah, you.

1120. All right, lawyer. Lawyer!

1121. Lawyer!

1122. Sir, we have a warrant for your arrest.

1123. - Lawyer. - You can get a lawyer when

1124. - you're in your holding cell. - Lawyer.

1125. William Stearn, you are under arrest for insider trading...

1126. - Lawyer. Lawyer. - and securities fraud.

1127. You have the right to remain silent.

1128. You might want to exercise that right.

1129. Come on. Let's go. Let's go, smart guy.

1130. ♪♪♪

1131. ♪♪♪

1132. Mm.