Big Love 1x4

1. - Whoo, it's cold out. - Mmm.

2. Where's Nicki?

3. What?

4. It's Nicki's night.

5. You've gotta go.

6. - Honey, what are you doing here? - It's our night.

7. It was. You didn't get my message?

8. - See the Post-It? - Post-It?

9. I traded with Barb.

10. Could you get me the heating pad and the Midol before you go?

11. Ben, wake up.

12. You gotta step on it. We're leaving in 15.

13. You awake?

14. My machine's on the fritz.

15. Can you believe it, the party?

16. I mean, the tablecloths alone. Should've used paper.

17. - What do you want? - Nothing.

18. - Give them. - No, I-I can do them later.

19. Benny, I have plenty of room.

20. Benny! Benny, I don't feel very good right now.

21. And, I did have 18 brothers growing up.

22. Just put them in the pile

23. and I'll bleach the heck out of them.

24. Don't worry, I'll take care of your sheets.

25. Mom, I have to work after school. Can I borrow the car?

26. Hold on. Stand still.

27. Hello?

28. Oh. Hi, Peter.

29. Yes. Uh-huh.

30. Today?

31. No... thank you.

32. No problem. I can be there.

33. Bye.

34. I got called in.

35. You okay?

36. - Tired. - Oh, tough night?

37. Yeah, I worked late.

38. People think having three wives is a walk in the park.

39. It wasn't the wives. I couldn't sleep.

40. Had these dreams all night.

41. - Oh yeah? - I was being chased,

42. at home, in the store... all over.

43. - Bad dreams? - Ran into Lawn and Garden

44. looking for a rake or some tool to defend myself with.

45. There was this, this clicking sound,

46. like fingernails clicking

47. when you drum your fingers.

48. - Yeah? - Following me,

49. coming closer and closer.

50. I can't shake it.

51. Are you sure it wasn't a revelation?

52. I don't know. It could've been, I guess.

53. Lots of revelations come through dreams.

54. You know, Lehi received revelations through his dreams.

55. Mine always come in...

56. I don't know... quiet premonitions.

57. - Did you cry? - No.

58. Oh, Vernie has tears streaming down her face

59. whenever she receives testimony.

60. And JoJo at the market,

61. she asks for personal revelations to show her which brands

62. like tuna in oil or in water.

63. And I tell her, "Jeepers, the Lord's not gonna hear that.

64. Use your own agency.

65. Pick whichever, as seeth you good. "

66. Now Peg, she's something else. She...

67. I, uh, brought in donuts. Saved you a jelly one.

68. - It's on your desk. - Thanks, buddy, but I'm gonna hold off.

69. I think I'm gonna fast on this one for a day or so,

70. maybe get some clarity on what this dream's all about.

71. Well, we're still on for tomorrow with Jason and Ben?

72. 4:00 a. m. Stopped by Fish and Game yesterday,

73. - picked up a license. - Great.

74. Hey, oh, we're gonna need to use your car.

75. Uh, there was a rabid skunk in the yard last night.

76. I grabbed up a shotgun and I got him,

77. but it let out a big cloud of stink, got all over the car.

78. - Couldn't wait 'til tomorrow, huh? - No.

79. It was fun.

80. This is in the way.

81. No no no! Are these the rules?

82. - Yes. - No, these are not the rules, Wayne!

83. Do we jump on the sofa, Ray?

84. Mommy's not feeling good, Wayne.

85. Do we jump up and down and yell and scream on the sofa?

86. - Yes. - No, we don't.

87. No, we don't. Get off now.

88. - Mom. - Off!

89. I'm sorry. Mommy didn't mean to yell.

90. - Mommy's not feeling so good. - Come on, Raymond,

91. we can jump up on the bed.

92. - Hello. - Is this Nicolette Grant?

93. - Yes, it is. - This is Utah One Bank calling.

94. Yes, I'm aware I have a balance.

95. Then, you're aware that we haven't received a payment from you.

96. Yes, I know my payment is a little late. It's just that...

97. Nicki!

98. Nicki... hi, honey. I've got good news.

99. It's some telemarketers... always in the morning.

100. I got called in for the day... an emergency.

101. Oh, that's... that's good, I guess.

102. It's good for all of us. You sure you don't wanna get that?

103. What's all this?

104. Teenie has a little classroom pageant at 4:00.

105. She needs her costume at 3:30 for tomorrow night's eclipse.

106. Lunar eclipse. I'm the moon.

107. It's a breeze. Just needs this hemmed,

108. and a pair of black tights.

109. Here is uh... 20 to pick them up.

110. She will meet you out front of the school at 3:20.

111. Are you all right?

112. I was up all night with cramps.

113. - Don't you think you should get... - No, I got it.

114. Okay.

115. - Hello? - You hung up on me before.

116. No, I'm more than happy with my telephone service.

117. Ms. Grant, I don't think you understand...

118. Just a second.

119. - Barb, this all fine. No problem. - Thank you.

120. And if you could pick up Sarah after work...

121. Yes, I understand. I'm gonna have to call you back, though.

122. You're making this extremely...

123. - No prob, Barb. Can do. - And while you're sewing...

124. Ben's jeans.

125. - Gosh, that thing won't stop. - Now, go.

126. - Scoot-scoot, I got it. - Teenie, you grab your lunch,

127. - I'll start the car. - Okay, Mom. Hurry.

128. - Thanks again, bye! - She's not here!

129. Nicolette, is that you?

130. Papa?

131. - Oh! - Ding-dong.

132. Uh, Barb, right? Carl...

133. - from across the street. - Of course.

134. - Hi, Carl. - Hi, hi.

135. Margene,

136. from next door, babysits for us.

137. Oh...

138. - Oh, is that little fella yours, too? - He's mine.

139. Right. She brings over her children when she babysits.

140. You know, I was actually looking for Bill.

141. He's at work.

142. - He left early. - You know it's fu... uh, the woman...

143. two houses down... your-your tenant,

144. - the one with the braid? - Mm-hmm, mm-hmm.

145. What about her?

146. It's nothing. I'll talk to Bill later.

147. Well, he won't be back until after 6:00 tonight... if I can help?

148. I'll just talk to him.

149. Bye-bye.

150. He knows something.

151. Darn Nicki and that overblown birthday party.

152. Bye.

153. Hi, I'm the babysitter.

154. Bill Henrickson. Can I help you?

155. - So how much? - Oh.

156. I don't know. L- I guess about five grand.

157. Say, we're doing a store drawing.

158. You can sign up with any of our cashiers.

159. That's pricey. Cheaper just to buy season tickets

160. to the Jazz, see the game in person, not on TV.

161. You asked for me?

162. Saw those ads, you in the cowboy hat.

163. - Pretty funny. - Is there something you want?

164. - I could get a salesperson to help you. - Don't need one.

165. I downloaded a Consumer Reports thing on TVs.

166. - I'm actually looking for

167. - this particular one. - Oh?

168. Let's take a look.

169. Pursuant to the underlying agreement, the UEB has the right

170. to audit your books... all of them.

171. That's a demand letter from our lawyer. Consider yourself served.

172. Who the heck are you?

173. I work for the prophet.

174. Have a nice day.

175. Is there any reason why?

176. She got called in. She's teaching today.

177. And nobody answers at Nicki's.

178. I'm so glad you called me, Lois.

179. I didn't call you. I thought this was Sarah's number.

180. Uh, she's at school. I've wanted to talk to you since the party.

181. Uh, just have Bill call me, tell him it's important.

182. I don't really think we got off on the right foot.

183. I feel you don't approve of me, like you don't like me.

184. And I think if you'll just give me a chance,

185. we can be good friends.

186. I want you to like me, okay?

187. - Okay? - Margie!

188. - What kind of emergency? - A family emergency.

189. So you need to finish Teenie's costume. It's a snap.

190. Patch Ben's jeans. Watch the boys.

191. Boys, hush!

192. Feel like I'm forgetting something.

193. I'll be back in time to help you with dinner.

194. I can't sew.

195. And I'm doing this aerobics thing. I gotta get this baby weight off.

196. Boys! Wayne, I mean it.

197. - You were gonna take my boys. - It's an emergency, Margie.

198. You need to deliver Teenie's costume to the front of the school

199. by 3:30 sharp, and pick up some black tights

200. on the way to go with it.

201. - Thanks so much, you're the best. - Hmm.

202. Bye, boys. Bye.

203. - Sorry to eat in front of you. - It doesn't bother me.

204. Told you you can't trust Roman.

205. - He's a wolf in sheep's clothing. - I don't trust him.

206. I just know we need to be patient.

207. Once he gets it that he can't intimidate me,

208. he'll move on to easier prey.

209. Tell that to that kitchen supply company in Moab.

210. - It was failing and Roman torched it. - Come on, Don.

211. - Arson. - It was never proven!

212. Gus Dalton...

213. he was in business with Juniper Creek.

214. - He falls out his office window. - You don't know that.

215. His wife said suicide,

216. said it was the antidepressants and sued the company.

217. I don't know how we can break ground on another store

218. with him still in the picture.

219. If his association with us becomes public,

220. - that's it, we're cooked. - I'm telling you,

221. - he's gonna go away, trust me. - I hope it's soon.

222. This corner isn't gonna stay on the market long.

223. - Hi. - Hi, what are you doing?

224. Counting cars. What's up?

225. Um, now that the store's open,

226. do you think I could get an advance

227. - on next month's allowance? - Nope, and if there were a way,

228. - you'd need to talk to Barb. - She got called in.

229. - Didn't she tell you? - Yeah.

230. - Isn't that great? - Bill,

231. - you give her too much power. - We all have our responsibilities.

232. I still think you give her too much power.

233. Honey, you gotta talk to Barb. That's that.

234. - Don't say a word. - Mm-hmm.

235. - That's five minutes. - Oh, fudge.

236. Lost count.

237. Two weeks.

238. That's how long the average butterfly lives.

239. - That's sad. - Well, not for the butterflies.

240. They're too busy courting and mating

241. - and laying eggs. - Do butterflies go to heaven?

242. Gosh. I don't know.

243. - I hope so. - If they're good, they should go.

244. - Mm-hmm. - Do they have to be baptized?

245. My dad says you have to be baptized

246. to go to the Celestial Kingdom.

247. Everybody, look at your papers.

248. One minute, I'll be right back.

249. Daddy.

250. Nicki. Come in, hon.

251. Do you have thorough and complete checkups?

252. Good. You must have

253. thorough and complete checkups.

254. The gift of the gospel lived is health.

255. Thank you, sister.

256. Come over here, honey, and sit down

257. so I can see you.

258. Now, honey,

259. you know I don't like being surprised.

260. I can explain everything.

261. It was just a little mistake.

262. See, Raymond had the chickenpox

263. and I was so worried when I was writing the bills

264. that I got confused and I accidentally

265. sent the credit card check to the electric company.

266. And, they called me, but the card company called you

267. 'cause you co-signed. And it's all just a mistake.

268. Well, I cosigned for $500,

269. and, uh, according to this,

270. you now owe 6,000.

271. Well, it's all right. To err is to be human.

272. - Does Bill know? - Absolutely.

273. - Of course. - Well, good.

274. But it does make me feel bad for him.

275. No man likes to have another person come between him and his wife.

276. If I were Bill, I might resent me.

277. Let's remove me as cosigner.

278. - Don't you think? - What are you doing?

279. We'll just give Bill a call.

280. I don't want him thinking of me as a meddling old father-in-law.

281. - Let's just tidy things up. - No, Papa,

282. don't.

283. Now this is for half.

284. There might be a way to pay off the rest

285. at the end of the month.

286. How's Bill's new store going?

287. He doesn't talk to me about business.

288. Oh.

289. Well, why don't we ask him about it?

290. If Bill were to throw you out,

291. you know you can always come back home.

292. Okay?

293. I'd like some more juice now, please.

294. Yes.

295. Bill Henrickson, my brother,

296. - big cheese! - Hey!

297. - Look at you. - How're you doing?

298. - What's up, Joey? - What's up?

299. - Nice to see you. - Wanda.

300. - What are you doing? - Uh, this and that.

301. - Can you stay for lunch? - No, we gotta be somewhere.

302. Let me give you the tour. Anything you want,

303. you can have it for cost.

304. - How's everything? - We're great.

305. - Super. - Sit, sit.

306. Uh, just wanted to stop by for a sec.

307. - We're doing stuff. - Yeah, all fancy.

308. Yeah, it's a... a speaking thing,

309. - kind of a presentation. - Where? What?

310. We're trying to run a nice, respectable fish farm,

311. and Roman's making him go off to the old folks' home.

312. Wanda, no one makes me do anything.

313. Making him brag about all his football stuff... Weaver State,

314. - Dallas, sign autographs. - The...

315. And then get the old people to invest in these worthless

316. ranches out in the desert. And it makes me sick.

317. - And it makes you sick, too. - Well, honey,

318. Roman knows a bit more about it than we do.

319. And it's not... I don't mind. Wanda, why don't you go

320. take a look around the store and see if there's, uh,

321. - something for the baby. - He's making Joey get the old people

322. to trust him first, and then write big checks.

323. And a bunch of them are suing and want their money back.

324. - I'd want my money back, too. - It's nothing I was involved in.

325. It was one of the first ranches. This is my first time.

326. And the lawsuit's put a real scare into Roman.

327. - That true? - Yeah, he stands up in meetings,

328. pleads with people for money to help fight off the suit.

329. What happened to all those investigations?

330. ATF was after him.

331. They brought in some hotshot lawyer from Denver,

332. said there weren't any guns. Anyway, even if there were,

333. it was perfectly legal. Um, anyway.

334. Say, you know I gave Benny my Super Bowl ring at the party.

335. That was real generous.

336. It'll mean more to him than it did to me.

337. The thing is, I need to borrow it back.

338. Just for a couple times. I need to show it off, you know?

339. The old people like it.

340. No no no no no no no.

341. No no no... keys keys keys!

342. Oh no. Oh no. Shoot!

343. Oh, my watch.

344. Boys, we're leaving!

345. Please please please please please please...

346. No!

347. Oh... oh!

348. Yes.

349. Oh, fuck!

350. Now, I just think the whole pledge thing is weird.

351. So were you still regular LDS when you took the pledge?

352. Nope.

353. - So how'd you become

354. - a polygamist, anyway? - Nuh-uh.

355. Mm-hmm, not me. I'm just along for the ride.

356. Okay, so your parents, I mean.

357. - I don't know. - Come on.

358. Uh...

359. Mom got cancer and almost died.

360. Dad just started...

361. believing in the principle again, I guess and...

362. and next thing you know, he married Nicki.

363. But how could your mom say yes to that?

364. Her version or mine? Her version, she just...

365. you know, started believing in the principle, too.

366. And mine...

367. she loves my dad too much and she's just afraid of losing him.

368. Must've been weird.

369. So I can get my mom's car,

370. and then I'll pick you up at 8:00.

371. Okay.

372. - Is this your house? - Uh no.

373. I live next door. I was trying to tell the woman on the phone

374. I wasn't a criminal, but she didn't believe me.

375. - Do I look like a criminal to you? - You never know.

376. - Um, what's your name? - Tui.

377. Tui? Hi. I'm Margene.

378. Uh, could I get you to disarm the system on that house two doors down

379. because I think I locked my keys inside.

380. - No, I can't do that. - Then I need you to drive me somewhere.

381. Fast.

382. - Hi, Mrs. Henrickson. - Hello.

383. Probably due to the weather.

384. 8%.

385. Listen, I gotta call you back.

386. Yeah yeah, call me after lunch.

387. Hey, what are you doing here? What's going on?

388. I had a break and I had to tell you.

389. They want me to fill in for an entire maternity leave,

390. a full six weeks through the end of the school year!

391. That is terrific.

392. Six weeks!

393. I mean, in theory, it's full time.

394. I'm not certified full time, but they're giving it to me anyway.

395. I'm so proud of you. Oh...

396. Have you run it by Nicki and Margene yet?

397. No. No, I wanted to tell you first.

398. Well, I think you better talk to them.

399. - Why? Do they have veto power? - Of course not.

400. Just, what you do affects them and I-I don't wanna...

401. Well, I know it affects them. I just thought you'd be pleased.

402. I am pleased, but I wanna make sure everyone else is too.

403. - Mm-hmm. - It's... I love you.

404. - I love you too. - Bill, Mr. Williams

405. - is here to see you. - Gee, I've got a meeting

406. - with a Westinghouse rep. - Go.

407. I'm kind of tied up, but...

408. that's-that's great news, honey.

409. Can you step on it a little bit, Tui?

410. No, I can't do that, ma'am.

411. Speed limit's 25 in a residential.

412. It's harassment, plain and simple.

413. Yeah, probably.

414. Babcock, Price and Coggins.

415. Just letterhead, but it sends a message.

416. Well, that's comforting.

417. - Like that kind of clicking? - Yeah, following me.

418. Could've been a big old hand.

419. People do have those dreams.

420. So what-what's the bottom line?

421. They have a right to audit.

422. - Both stores? - The language of the original contract,

423. which we did not draft, it's pretty clear.

424. They have a right to an audit at a time and a place of their choosing.

425. Great, just great. Well, I need to think.

426. Hate to tell you. Not much to think about.

427. - Not on this one. - Well, I need to think anyway.

428. You'd never guess an old reprobate like Roman Grant

429. would go high-end corporate counsel.

430. I'm impressed.

431. Teenie, I'm here.

432. Everything is gonna be just fine.

433. - I got your costume. - I need tights, Margie.

434. - I need tights. - I know.

435. But everything got crazy and I couldn't stop.

436. - So these'll work. - What is it?

437. It's pantyhose. Come on.

438. Come get in the car.

439. I'll put them on you. Come on.

440. Tui, scoot over a little bit?

441. It's two number three's, a large iced tea and a Frosty Freeze.

442. It's 9.90 at the next window.

443. You know, a couple West Jordan players came after the game last night.

444. They were gonna come back after closing.

445. Yeah, they won't. You're a whore.

446. - They smelled it on you. - So sad, bang-bang.

447. Why don't you go have another strawberry shake?

448. - Here's your fries. - Thank you.

449. So are you coming to that party with me on Saturday?

450. No, actually she's not. We're actually...

451. Not you.

452. Don't know. Nothing like watching a whore scramble

453. - for her eternal damnation. - So hot.

454. Maybe we'll go, Heather and I.

455. To the same party as her? No way.

456. You don't wanna go, either. So let's go to the Spaghetti Factory.

457. They opened a new one at Trolly Square.

458. Or we could go boy-hunting with Donna.

459. - Why not? - Not a hard choice.

460. Come on, let's go to The Spaghetti Factory.

461. I don't know. It'll be fun.

462. - The party's up at the university. - You know,

463. - you could get a latte and go wild,

464. - bang-bang. - You know what?

465. I've upped my standards. So up yours.

466. So perfect.

467. - Thought you didn't wanna go? - Changed my mind.

468. May I take your order?

469. Generally, the three heavenly bodies

470. stay in their own orbits, but...

471. once in a while something very special happens.

472. Once in a great while, like tomorrow night,

473. there is a lunar eclipse.

474. Look, it's a full moon!

475. You know I don't know how to sew. She gave me like Ben's jeans

476. and she gave me this...

477. Teenie's devastated, completely heartbroken.

478. - What happened? - Shouldn't we ask you that?

479. How's the family emergency going?

480. Yeah, somebody die at The Gap?

481. - I had to see my father. - No, Nicki.

482. Nicki, I wanna know

483. why you had enough time to go shopping but not enough time

484. to take care of your responsibilities here.

485. Now, Teenie was prancing around in a pair of old pantyhose.

486. I don't know a thing about that.

487. It was so simple, Nicki... just finish the costume

488. - and get a pair of tights. - Something came up.

489. I don't know why it was my responsibility to make a moon suit.

490. I made Margene responsible because something important came up,

491. just like you've done to me 100 times.

492. Margie doesn't know how to take care of these little things.

493. Right. Of course not because I'm just the babysitter.

494. That is not what I meant.

495. You know, I don't have to answer to you, Barb.

496. I have important responsibilities in the world, too.

497. No, and while we're at it, everyone in the neighborhood

498. - is asking questions about us. - Never mind, I get it.

499. No, I don't think you do, Nicki. The party was a fiasco.

500. It called attention to us at a time when discretion

501. is the most important value we hold.

502. From here on out, no one comes to these houses in prairie outfits.

503. - Outfits? - Period.

504. Oh, you have no authority to make that rule, Barbara.

505. How about this? How about, we all get to make rules?

506. My rule is: First wives don't get to run off constantly

507. taking jobs on a whim and shove their responsibilities

508. onto second wives anymore.

509. Well, if we all get to make rules, then here's my rule:

510. Second wives can't sleep with third wives' husbands

511. in third wives' own bedrooms!

512. Oh, would you stop harping on that? Just get over it.

513. All right. Let's all calm down.

514. This is not in the spirit of who we are.

515. Come on!

516. Hands.

517. Barb, I just can't right now... maybe later.

518. I need to take some Midol.

519. All right, then. Ahem.

520. Later.

521. Tell him I don't mind, Dad.

522. You're a good boy, Benny.

523. Never kick a man when he's down.

524. I cannot bear what Roman's doing to Joey...

525. a front man, dressed up and sent out like a trained monkey.

526. - Roman says, "Dance," and he dances. - Honey.

527. Nothing you can do about it. The end of the day,

528. everyone has to live by their own decisions.

529. Any chance Joey has of getting free,

530. any chance he has of getting on his feet...

531. Dinner in five.

532. Do you think something bad is gonna happen tomorrow, Daddy?

533. No. Why, sweetie?

534. The eclipse. She's been studying about it.

535. - It's a bad omen. - Mm-hmm.

536. I think tomorrow's gonna be a great day.

537. Hey, dress warm. Still see some snow up there.

538. Just what we need, more venison.

539. I'm not gonna shoot anything. Tomorrow's Ben's day.

540. - Right, son? - Yeah, I can't wait.

541. Benny, could you get me some ketchup from the pantry?

542. Mm-hmm.

543. Oh, I was going to tell you.

544. I'm afraid the neighbor Carl, across the street,

545. - suspects something. - Uh, he called me at the office.

546. He just wants permission to repaint the house number

547. on the curb in front of Nicki's. Some kind of...

548. fundraising project.

549. No way! 30-ought-six! Thank you so much!

550. A 30... thank you,

551. thank you, thank you, thank you, thank you!

552. - Watch where you aim that thing. - Thanks, Dad.

553. Hey, remember tomorrow...

554. no deodorant, no soap and no mouthwash.

555. Like you really have to tell him that.

556. Hey, Nick.

557. Just wanted to see if you were feeling any better.

558. Yeah, I'm fine.

559. You were so quiet at dinner.

560. Thanks for noticing.

561. Hey, come on.

562. You're my rock.

563. Margene said you saw your father today.

564. Why didn't you tell me?

565. I don't know.

566. - He just called me. - About what?

567. He was sick.

568. He asked about you.

569. - Asked about the new store. - What'd you tell him?

570. The truth... that you don't talk to me about the business.

571. - Look, I didn't mean to upset you. - Oh.

572. Bill, you're my husband.

573. Come on, I would never do anything to hurt you.

574. Heavenly Father,

575. we thank you for this beautiful day.

576. We ask that you bless Ben's new rifle

577. and make it shoot straight and true.

578. And bless the deer... may its death be quick and painless.

579. In the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

580. Amen.

581. - Gentlemen. - Yes, sir.

582. This is Don, this is Don. Come in, Bill.

583. Bill to Don, Bill to Don. Reading you loud and clear, partner.

584. - Let's go. - Good luck.

585. - Have fun. - Let's go, Jace.

586. And I know you should never take out

587. a second mortgage to pay off your credit card debts.

588. All right, now, that you've got right.

589. I think I have to file for bankruptcy

590. - but those laws just changed, right? - All right. Listen, Nicki...

591. you really really gotta help me out here. Let's deal with this.

592. How much credit card debt do you actually have?

593. I don't know, around...

594. $20,000, I think.

595. - You think? How much? - Maybe...

596. maybe 30.

597. Nicki, here is the bottom line...

598. when you don't know for sure

599. how much credit card debt you have, that says to me,

600. probably somebody else doesn't know, either.

601. Now, you are married. Don't tell me that you are hiding

602. this debt not only from yourself but from your husband as well.

603. - Am I right? - Yes.

604. Do you understand that he is legally responsible for this debt?

605. So don't you think you owe it to him

606. to tell him how much debt you have?

607. But that's why I was calling.

608. See, I wanna know what I can do so he never has to know.

609. No no no no no. Truth attracts money,

610. but lies repel it. You are never going to be able

611. to get the money you need to pay off this debt

612. if you continue to lie, not only to yourself

613. but to your husband.

614. People first, then money, then things.

615. I say it all the time. And by the way, Nicki,

616. will you just get a grip on how much credit card debt

617. you actually have? I don't know, Nicki.

618. I'm not happy with you.

619. You're up next on the Suze Orman Show.

620. Hi. Uh, am I on?

621. Mom, I'm going to a party tonight, okay?

622. - What kind of party? - Just regular.

623. Well, then leave me the regular information...

624. where, when, phone number,

625. and be home at 11:30.

626. You're gonna miss all the pots and pans.

627. - What? - Uh, the Chinese

628. used to bang pots and pans to scare off the demons

629. trying to devour the earth,

630. according to Teenie.

631. - I have a question. - Teenie, go get your costume.

632. Did it take you, like, days or months

633. to get used to the idea of polygamy when Dad brought it up?

634. It was a gradual process.

635. Why?

636. I don't know, I was just thinking.

637. How did Roman take over the compound?

638. How did he get in control?

639. Roman was your great-grandfather Orville's accountant.

640. And after the raids in the '50s,

641. Orville set up the UEB and Roman manipulated the shares.

642. I don't really understand how,

643. but he tricked Orville and was able to vote him out.

644. It was like a hostile takeover.

645. - Oh. - Roman took Orville's land

646. and most of his wives

647. and left your dad's family poor as dirt.

648. Huh.

649. Wait, Sarah?

650. I want you to remember that we are not those people

651. and we never will be, if that's what this is all about.

652. I have been over to Nicki's three times in the last two hours

653. and she won't come out of the bathroom.

654. She won't answer me, either.

655. How's your girlfriend?

656. She's okay. I mean, I really like her.

657. It's confusing.

658. I've been having weird dreams.

659. No kidding?

660. How do you know if God's talking to you,

661. or if you're just talking to yourself?

662. It's one of the most important challenges in life, Ben...

663. to learn to hear, recognize the voice of the Lord.

664. Staying wholesome's part of it...

665. so many addictions in this world...

666. TV and food and gluttony,

667. things that are offensive

668. and numbing to the spirit.

669. But you also have to be very careful.

670. Sometimes, you think it's the Lord speaking

671. and it's just your own emotions, your own demons.

672. Can anyone have a revelation?

673. Well, we all have the potential

674. to receive testimony, Ben.

675. - In dreams? - Dreams...

676. Mr. H, Mr. H, uh, a wolf... holy macaroni.

677. Dad... Daddy went back to get the pie and I was...

678. I was peeing and I saw a wolf! He was running up a hill.

679. He's not gonna hurt you, son.

680. Just leave it alone, it'll leave you alone.

681. Rule of the wild: Snakes, bears, wolves...

682. they're all the same. Just give them a wide berth

683. and they'll head off on their own.

684. Gee, thanks Mr. H.

685. Are you all right in there?

686. Nicki?

687. Nicki, Margene and I are worried. Could you come out now?

688. Nicki, please open the door.

689. - Nicki, please, this is really... - Your children need you!

690. Nicki, just come out of there.

691. Nicki! I am about to call 911.

692. If you're all right, then you better open up this door right now!

693. Margene, please.

694. All I wanted was a little privacy.

695. Guess that's too much to ask, for Pete's sake.

696. We were concerned about you.

697. You have been in the nastiest mood since you got your period.

698. Oh really? Maybe I'm just mad at you, Barb.

699. Did you ever think... what?

700. When were you gonna tell us about your new job offer?

701. After you took it? Huh, Boss Lady?

702. Please, stop calling me that.

703. Margene, distract them.

704. Please, please!

705. If you and I could have a rational conversation, I...

706. I'm rational now. And my answer is no.

707. - You cannot take that job. - That is not your decision.

708. Wait a minute. What job?

709. I'm not your personal assistant, Barb.

710. And neither is Margie.

711. I did nothing that we haven't done 100 times before.

712. - The money goes into a common pot. - That is not the point.

713. You can't make decisions that affect us without consulting us first.

714. Right, Margie? We're equals.

715. - Please stop it, you two. - Equals?

716. You treat Margene like she's your maid!

717. I got her a stereo.

718. - Where did you get the money for that? - Money money money...

719. that's all anyone ever thinks about around here.

720. Then, you won't care

721. that you won't get an advance on next month's allowance.

722. Just stop it! I hate this.

723. First, it's your classes at the university two nights a week,

724. then it's weekends with The Cancer Society of Beehive Village.

725. - Now, it's a fulltime job? - Six weeks!

726. You are being so spiteful. I am taking the job,

727. and that's that.

728. What job?

729. Shoot! Dang!

730. Did you see him? I can't believe I missed him.

731. - How could I... - Take it easy,

732. you have to have patience.

733. The hunt's not just the kill.

734. It's about waiting, planning,

735. then deciding when to act.

736. You'll get him next time.

737. Here... here, drink that.

738. Hot hot.

739. - Do you wanna dance? - Mmm,

740. the night is young. Oh, this is gonna be great.

741. More, more. Don't you wanna get all gushy?

742. - I wanna dance. - Oh, God.

743. It's those guys, those guys from West Jordan.

744. - Come on, come on. - Forget it,

745. I'm not into picking up someone.

746. Well, I am. Here, you finish it.

747. Mom, it's starting.

748. Have you talked to Nicki?

749. Hmm, I have nothing to say to her.

750. Oh.

751. What are these for?

752. To bang and scare the dragon away.

753. Donna.

754. - Let's go. - How come?

755. 'Cause I don't feel good and everybody's leaving

756. and you drove and you're a mess.

757. - What, is this your mother? - No, she's not my mother.

758. Just a few more minutes.

759. What are you doing here?

760. Satan's whore inside?

761. I guess.

762. Came to see if you needed a ride home.

763. I do.

764. Oh.

765. Sit up.

766. - Oh. - Sorry.

767. Okay.

768. Oh, I don't feel good.

769. - Cough syrup. - What size?

770. Eight ounce. Two of them, though.

771. Thanks for coming.

772. You have to promise me something.

773. Okay.

774. Donna goes to Mercer so I don't...

775. I don't care what she knows.

776. You...

777. can never tell a soul about my family.

778. - Okay. - As far as you know,

779. I have one father

780. and one mother.

781. - Okay? - Yeah.

782. I mean ever.

783. No, I got it.

784. Okay okay.

785. Shut up!

786. - You had a good time, right? - Yeah, um...

787. I'm going after Roman.

788. I'm gonna take it to him.

789. Bill?

790. Did you see the eclipse?

791. We made so much noise we scared the dragon away.

792. We saved the king. We saved the world.

793. Are you coming in soon?

794. In a minute.

795. - It's Nicki's night. - I know.

796. I'm glad you're home.

797. Things go a little haywire when you're not here.

798. Sweet dreams.