1. - Welcome to another edition
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2. of Between Two Ferns.
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3. I'm your host, Zach Galifianakis.
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4. This is a Oscar edition
of Between Two Ferns,
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5. a special Oscar insight to Oscar nominees
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6. and all of their Oscar
buzzness around them.
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7. My first guest is Jennifer Lawrence.
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8. Jennifer, thank you.
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9. - Thank you.
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10. - I got a beef to pick with
your costar, Bradley Cooper,
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11. because he had told me that
in real life that you were,
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12. I wrote it down, I wanna
make sure I get it right,
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13. ugly—
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14. - Wow.
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15. - And I gotta be honest,
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16. I don't know what he's talking about,
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17. unless he was just joking with me.
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18. You're really good looking.
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19. So, you played in a movie
called the Hunger Games.
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20. - Yeah, isn't that your
life story?
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21. - You shouldn't say that.
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22. That's off putting.
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23. - You should be off pudding
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24. 'cause you're fat.
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25. You shouldn't eat any more pudding—
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26. - Yeah, yeah.
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27. When you take on a project
like Silver Linings Playbook,
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28. what draws you into that character?
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29. What spoke to you?
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30. - Well, I think Tiffany taught,
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31. I love that she taught me
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32. a lot about,
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33. Is this, are you playing me off right now?
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34. Are you seriously playing me,
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35. oh my god.
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36. Oh my god.
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37. - In the Oscar tradition.
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38. Good luck.
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39. - Hi, Zach.
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40. - Oh hi, welcome.
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41. - Nice to meet you.
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42. - Nice to meet you.
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43. This is Naomi Watts.
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44. You're from Australia,
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45. and I read that the
toilets work backwards,
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46. and have you read about that?
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47. Well, I guess for you,
it's backwards here,
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48. but backwards for us in Australia.
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49. - Yeah, apparently—
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50. - Does that mean that feces goes back
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51. into your rectum?
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52. How does that work?
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53. - No, it's not,
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54. yeah, no, it doesn't do that.
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55. - When you're like in a movie,
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56. do they shrink you down
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57. so you can fit into the camera?
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58. Like, how does that work?
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59. - Yeah, no, I've been
shrunk too many times.
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60. I have to stop working for a while.
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61. - Are there side effects?
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62. - Just diarrhea.
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63. - Okay.
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64. - Thank you.
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65. - Mr. Waltz.
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66. Thanks for joining us.
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67. - Thank you for inviting me.
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68. - Christoph Waltz is here
from Django Unchained.
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69. I got your text about not bringing up
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70. your Mein Kampf tattoo, so I won't.
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71. Have you ever thought
about changing your name
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72. to Christoph Break dance?
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73. - I have, but it doesn't
really make sense.
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74. - What is your preparation
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75. to get ready for a part?
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76. - That's none of your
business to tell you the truth
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77. because I think it's
completely overvalued—
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78. - It is my business.
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79. You're on my talk show.
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80. - These stories about
actor's preparations—
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81. - And I have questions for you.
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82. You coming here is part of my business—
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83. - I don't need to—
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84. - Don't sit there and
run your mouth back at me
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85. in English, French, German, or Italian.
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86. - Have you ever noticed that a magician—
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87. - And say that that's none of my business.
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88. It's all of my business.
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89. - Wouldn't dare to tell you
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90. how they do their magic tricks?
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91. - Do you say the N-word
more in Django Unchained
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92. or more in real life?
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93. - More in real life.
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94. - Oh, I think that's it.
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95. - Oh.
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96. - There you go.
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97. Misty will take you.
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98. - Right this way.
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99. - Where have you been?
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100. Thank you.
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101. - You are pleasant.
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102. - Please.
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103. - Hi.
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104. - Hey.
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105. - I missed you.
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106. Where do I sit?
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107. - You can sit on this little chair.
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108. You can sit on the other.
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109. - You're funny.
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110. - Yeah, right.
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111. - You're really funny.
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112. I like you.
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113. - Thanks, Anne.
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114. - Sorry.
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115. - Thanks, thanks, Anne.
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116. So how much did you have to drink today?
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117. - No, I didn't.
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118. You don't know that.
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119. You can't prove it.
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120. - To be honest with you,
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121. I smelled it on you when you—
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122. - No, that's my perfume.
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123. It's not that all.
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124. - Is your perfume Ketel One?
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125. Ow, ow, ow.
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126. What the,
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127. what the what?
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128. - It's alright.
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129. It's okay,
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130. just be strong.
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131. Here you go, right over there.
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132. - My bag's busted.
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133. - I know.
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134. - Thanks, Anne.
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135. - What, you're busted.
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136. - Hi.
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137. - Hello.
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138. - How are you doing?
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139. - Good, thanks.
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140. Amy Adams is here, everybody.
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141. - Hi.
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142. - You have red hair and—
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143. - Yes, I do, I do.
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144. Guess what they used to
call me in high school.
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145. - Cinnamon Muff.
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146. - No, they didn't call me Cinnamon Muff.
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147. - What do they call you?
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148. Fire Crotch.
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149. - No, Strawberry Shortcake,
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150. small child's doll.
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151. - You know, I find you to be
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152. a wonderful actress and I—
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153. - Thank you.
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154. - Can I give you an acting challenge?
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155. - Okay.
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156. - I'm gonna show you a line,
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157. and then I'm hoping that you could do it
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158. with as much weight and gravity
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159. to it as possible.
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160. It's a pretty serious line.
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161. I'll say action.
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162. Action.
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163. - Don't you ever
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164. fart on my tits again.
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