Beavis and Butt-head 5x33

Directed by Mike Judge

Beavis & Butt-head find a dead squirrel and try to sell its fur.

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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

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1. I

2. More stupid for throwing this stuff out. Yeah, what a bunch of dumbasses

3. Cool

4. What is it?

5. Whatever it is, it stinks, Beavis.

6. It does?

7. What should we do with it?

8. We could like take a leak on it.

9. That would be cool.

10. Damn it! I just took a leak on some dog turds!

11. Hey, we could keep it like a pet.

12. Beavis, you asked Monchid's dead.

13. Yeah, it's pretty cool.

14. I know, let's sell the fur.

15. Then we can buy something cool.

16. Yeah, it's pretty cool.

17. This sucks.

18. Err, what's the matter?

19. A perfect disaster.

20. Alright, who's the lead singer here?

21. Yeah, come on.

22. Let's get this crap straight now before we shoot the video.

23. Keep an eye on that dude, he's got his hands on his pants.

24. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's he doing back there?

25. Is that Elton, John?

26. Yeah, yeah, it is. That's him.

27. That's him, alright.

28. Yep, and that's his dad and like his whole family, too.

29. Oh yeah.

30. Check it out, I can read sign language.

31. Will Beavis ever score?

32. And the answer is...

33. I source no.

34. Cut off what I hear.

35. You're never gonna score.

36. Cut off what I hear.

37. But they both are accurate.

38. She didn't shake it enough either.

39. Yeah, right.

40. Damn it.

41. If I see one of these pictures of water and a video again,

42. I'm gonna smack somebody.

43. Yeah, it's like they put that in every damn video.

44. You really can smack somebody's butt in.

45. Err, okay.

46. Can I have my head?

47. I didn't put the water in the damn video.

48. Well, you probably would have if you had gone to video college or something.

49. But now thanks to me, you never will.

50. Thanks, buddy.

51. You wanna buy some fur?

52. What do you think?

53. I think you do.

54. Yeah, yeah, me. And don't try to jump us.

55. And don't waste our time unless you're serious.

56. This is real fur.

57. I'll give it to you for some nachos.

58. Check it out.

59. Check score nuts for this crap.

60. You might score.

61. We'll take nachos, you know, the fucking pops.

62. Look, here's the nachos.

63. Now get that damn thing out of here.

64. Cool.

65. This animal is like good luck.

66. Yeah, maybe they'll buy it at the mall.

67. Hey, buddy.

68. If we were like dead in an animal found us,

69. you think you'd try to like sell our fur?

70. Don't be stupid, baby.

71. He'd probably just sniff our butts.

72. Really?

73. Yeah.

74. Can I help you?

75. We got like some fur.

76. Yeah. We'll sell it to you for like $20.

77. Yeah. And it's worth at least half that.

78. Sorry, boys. But we don't sell real fur anymore.

79. Tell you what, I'll give you a buck

80. and I'll dispose of this poor thing properly.

81. That's a pretty good deal.

82. No way, he's worth more than that.

83. Just look at him.

84. What if he gave us like $5?

85. Yeah, yeah, okay.

86. We'll take $5.

87. And that's like our final offer or something?

88. $5. I'm going to have to ask you to leave

89. and take your smelly little creature with you.

90. Okay. Come on, baby.

91. Oh, yeah. Well, you suck.

92. And your sucky store sucks.

93. You don't know what good fur is.

94. I'm gonna tell everybody that you don't sell real fur here.

95. They don't sell real fur here.

96. You suck.

97. Next, if you've ever dared to dream,

98. if you've ever looked to the sky and wondered,

99. if you've ever stepped in something you wish you hadn't,

100. just stay tuned.

101. I don't understand how come nobody wants our fur.

102. I don't know. It's like that saying,

103. don't look a dead horse in the mouth.

104. I don't think this is a horse, buddard.

105. What are you doing, baby?

106. Now I have a fur hat, like David Krockett.

107. Cool. I bet you could like pick up chicks with that hat.

108. Less like they didn't like animals or something.

109. Hey, baby. Check out his fur.

110. Ew. That's gross.

111. Yeah, it's a dead animal.

112. Not anymore, though.

113. Now he's a hat.

114. So like, how about it?

115. Yo, it's so disgusting. No way.

116. You've good luck.

117. Well, if you really like something,

118. you have to set it free.

119. And if it comes back to you, it's yours.

120. And if it doesn't, then like, it never was yours.

121. Yeah, that's why we have to go now.

122. Oh, yeah.

123. So, I guess we'll see you when you come back to us.

124. Wow.

125. You're a nice move, buddard.

126. Well, you heard her, dude.

127. Set it free.

128. You can go if you want.

129. I guess if we go away,

130. and then if we come back, and it's still here, then it's ours.

131. Oh, yeah.

132. I'm back.

133. It's really mine.

134. I mean ours.

135. And ours.

136. And ours.

137. And ours.

138. This is a proper plan.

139. Plant man.

140. What's that?

141. Oh, check it out, buddard.

142. That's the thing I always plan the drum.

143. I can play that.

144. Yeah.

145. That's probably the only thing this guy can play.

146. Yeah, I can play that.

147. Yeah.

148. Yeah.

149. Yeah.

150. Yeah.

151. Yeah.

152. Yeah.

153. Yeah.

154. Yeah.

155. Yeah.

156. Yeah.

157. Yeah.

158. Hey, Ponhan.

159. Hey, I just had a phone

160. What're you like with a red,

161. like a problem?

162. I just thought of something else.

163. How come you keep doing that, leave us?

164. Don't want.

165. A thing where you go.

166. Hey.

167. Oh man.

168. I don't know.

169. That's gonna feel good.

170. Hey, how are you going, man?

171. Hey, hey.

172. Hey, that stuff felt pretty good.

173. Hey, hey.

174. Hey, the filter.

175. Hey, hey.

176. Hey.

177. Hey.

178. Those chicks haven't come back yet, right?

179. Not yet.

180. So, um, I guess that means like they were never ours to begin with.

181. Damn it, baby.

182. If there's one thing I know, it's chicks.

183. They'll be back.

184. They're just like playing hard to get or something.

185. Hard to get.

186. Don't get it, lucky.

187. Shoot dumb-ass.

188. It's dead.

189. It can't fetch.

190. Yeah, can.

191. Check it out.

192. Go get it, boy.

193. Yeah.

194. See?

195. Never fun.

196. Never fun.

197. Oh, check it out.

198. It's coming in.

199. Yeah.

200. Yeah.

201. What are they doing that guy?

202. Maybe they're welding a butt cheek shut.

203. Why would they do that?

204. I don't know.

205. I think it would be cool to have a butt without a crack.

206. If like, instead of having two butt cheeks, you just have one.

207. It's so cool.

208. It's like, um, how would you take a dump?

209. If like, you wouldn't have to take a dump anymore.

210. It goes like, you know, you'd only have one butt.

211. Really?

212. Um, I don't know.

213. I kind of miss it.

214. This butt munch sounds like Dave Mustaine.

215. Yeah, really.

216. You're not kidding, my son.

217. You're really swinging.

218. Yeah.

219. What a butt munch.

220. Oh, look, he just flipped somebody up.

221. Yeah, yeah, that's pretty cool.

222. Uh, not unless we know who he flipped off.

223. Oh, yeah.

224. Maybe he flipped off that dude.

225. Yeah, what is that?

226. Uh, I think it's like, uh, John.

227. Yeah.

228. He's like, you didn't have any of them.

229. Yeah.

230. Why don't they do that?

231. It might help the thong out a little bit.