1. She has fallen on hard times.
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2. But Meredith Baxter Birney
is a woman with a mission.
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3. Three missions: Nurse.
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4. Walk, dammit!
Walk!
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5. Vigilante.
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6. Stay away from my kid
or your ass is mine!
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7. - Seductress.
- Dinner's on.
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8. Meredith Baxter Birney
"One woman's burden".
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9. Saturday on the Time
Of Your Life network.
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10. This sucks.
Change the channel, dude.
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11. - Check this out.
- Yeah.
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12. Olivia Newton-John sucks.
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13. That's not Olivia Neutered-John.
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14. That's that rich chick
from 9-0-... 2..6..1.
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15. Oh, yeah. Donna.
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16. That's not Donna.
Donna's a slut.
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17. - This is Kelly.
- No way, dude.
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18. Donna is not a slut.
She is the virgin, Kelly is the slut.
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19. - Does she look like a slut to you Beavis?
- Yeah.
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20. That's why it's Donna.
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21. Yeah, but you just said
Donna is not a slut.
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22. Oh yeah.
That must be Kelly.
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23. Whoa.
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24. - Hey Beavis.
- Yeah, yeah.
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25. Check it out... it... it's...
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26. Which one is Ozzy?
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27. That's him in the Members Only jacket.
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28. - No way, that's Ozzy's son.
- Yeah.
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29. - Ozzy's older than that
- Yeah, Ozzy is an old fart.
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30. - Cool!
- Yeah.
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31. - This is cool.
- Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!
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32. Whoa.
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33. Hey Butt-Head,
are these guys from Seattle?
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34. No, ass munch, they are American.
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35. Oh yeah.
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36. Whoa, that's that Paul
Shaffer dude on the wall.
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37. - Cool!
- Yeah.
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38. Hey Butt-Head,
Ozzy bit off the head of a cow once.
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39. Yeah, that was cool.
Milk poured out of its neck.
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40. No, dude.
You light it first.
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41. No, no. Light it first,
then spray.
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42. Yeah light it first, then spray.
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43. That was cool.
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44. Okay class.
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45. Can I have your attention please?
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46. Okay class.
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47. Today we're going to explore
the world of haiku.
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48. We're gonna explore the
world of getting high?
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49. Cool!
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50. No Butt-Head, not "high cool".
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51. But the ancient Japanese
spare haunting poetry called haiku.
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52. Haiku is a three line poem.
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53. The first and last line
are five syllables.
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54. The middle line is seven syllables.
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55. A syllable, of course, is one sound.
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56. "Butt-Head" is two syllables.
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57. Butt and Head.
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58. So, now that you know that, Butt-Head,
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59. why don't you compose
a haiku for the class.
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60. Okay, come on, Butt-Head.
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61. - I have to go to the bathroom.
- Don't be scared.
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62. You're blocking.
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63. Come on Butt-Head, five syllables,
seven syllables, five syllables.
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64. It's easy. Make your haiku
about something you know.
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65. What you did yesterday, for instance.
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66. Now, your first line
is five syllables. Come on.
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67. That was cool.
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68. Okay, next line - seven syllables.
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69. - When we killed that frog.
- Okay.
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70. And the last line - five syllables.
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71. It won't croak again.
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72. Okay.
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73. "That was cool huh huh".
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74. "When we killed that frog huh huh".
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75. It won't croak again.
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76. Okay. Your turn, Beavis.
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77. Okay, Beavis.
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78. "Huh huh huh huh huh".
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79. "Huh huh huh m
huh huh huh m."
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80. "Huh huh m uh huh."
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81. Okay, great work guys. You both
get A's for this exercise.
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82. - I like fire.
- Yeah.
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83. Fire!
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84. Fire! Fire! Fire! Fire!
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85. What?
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86. - Huh?
- Yeah.
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87. What?
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88. - The boogedy-woogedy-googedy.
- Yeah.
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89. Connected to the what bone?
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90. Connected to the butt bone.
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91. Cool!
I like explosions.
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92. - Yeah, me too.
- These guys are cool.
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93. Yeah.
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94. Never can start this
career councelling too early.
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95. Okay, here is the files.
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96. Oh, whoa, there are people
in the bottom percentile...
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97. Now, this teacher's note says
you should be poets.
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98. - And go to the Liberal Arts college.
- That was cool when the cyborg...
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99. - Now, what do teachers know...
- made himself self look like...
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100. You boys ever read
Huxley's "Brave New World"?
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101. kicked ass.
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102. - Yeah.
- No, I guess not.
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103. - Well, Huxley thought that...
- Veltor is cool.
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104. - humans could be...
- The defenders of Daytron City
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105. could kick his ass any day.
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106. fulfilling to the stupidest
people, hmm well.
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107. Yes!
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108. - Yes!
- Yes! Yes!
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109. - Let's rock!
- Yeah.
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110. - How come these guys are never on TV?
- Yeah.
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111. - They are cool.
- Yeah.
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112. It's about time they
played something cool.
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113. - These guys have cool haircuts.
- Yeah.
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114. I'm gonna get dreadlocks like that.
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115. First you, like, roll up your hair,
and then you take a stick,
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116. an... an...
and take, like, some glue.
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117. Shut up, dumb-ass!
I'm trying to listen.
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118. These guys rock!
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119. Yeah.
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120. Fishbones are cool!
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121. - They should play these guys all the time.
- Yeah.
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