Batman: The Animated Series 3x7

Directed by Boyd Kirkland

Mark Hamill as The Joker (voice) • Mari Devon as Summer Gleeson (voice) • Richard Jeni as Host (voice) • Andrea Martin as Rolling Pin (voice) • Stuart Pankin as Condiment King (voice)

Batman and Robin investigate a string of crimes committed by a group of famous comedians brainwashed by the Joker.

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!req Batman: The Animated Series 3x7 [02:32]
!req Batman: The Animated Series 3x7 [Batman: The Animated Series 3x7]
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Subtitle languages: English • Spanish • Brazilian Portuguese

Note: you must use specific languages with their specific pages/discord channels.

1. 'We've waited weeks for the reservation.'

2. Name?

3. 'King. Party of one.'

4. King. King. No, I'm sorry.

5. I don't show that reservation.

6. Oh, yeah? Well, let me show you something, fruitcake.

7. crash

8. Heads-up, chow hounds.

9. Drop your forks and prepare to cower

10. before the uncanny Condiment King!

11. Who is that?

12. Some kind of nutcase.

13. Just ignore him.

14. 'Someone will call security.'

15. Hey. Hey!

16. I don't believe this!

17. I say cower and you're still eating?

18. Well, alright then.

19. splash

20. Ah!

21. Now, see here, you.

22. plop

23. Hot sauce!

24. Anyone else want to be a hero?

25. Now, take out your wallets, cash and jewels

26. and toss 'em here on the table.

27. 'Come on. Right now.'

28. 'Disturbance reported at the top of the Crown Restaurant.'

29. 'Suspect is a male costumed extremist'

30. 'armed with what appears to be a ketchup gun.'

31. It's gonna be one of those nights.

32. clink

33. So long, suckers.

34. Parting is such sweet-and-sour sorrow.

35. Whoa!

36. What's this?

37. Oh! The big bad bat guy.

38. I knew you'd catch up to me sooner or later.

39. How I've relished this meeting.

40. You, the dynamic Dark Knight

41. versus me, the conceptual Condiment King!

42. Come, Batman.

43. Let's see if you can cut the mustard..

44. - Ugh! - Quiet.

45. You hit me.

46. Now, listen, mustard man

47. or whatever you call yourself.

48. You're obviously new at this

49. so I'm willing to go easy on you.

50. Provided you give back the loot

51. and never even think about doing this again.

52. Deal?

53. Horseradish.

54. This is your last warning.

55. Let's go, Batso. You and me.

56. I'm the prince of pickles, sultan of sauce.

57. You don't stand a chance, you hear me?

58. Later, chump.

59. Uh, oh, uh..

60. Hang on!

61. thud

62. Harvey, call an ambulance.

63. - Uh. - I know this man.

64. He's that TV comic, Buddy Standler.

65. 'Still no clues in the mystery behind'

66. comedian Buddy Standler's one-man crime spree last night.

67. A rampage that ended with a trip to the hospital

68. for the famed TV comic.

69. 'Though Standler himself is unable to account'

70. for his actions, his manager had these observations.

71. I don't get it.

72. Buddy's just thrown his entire career away.

73. The network's canceling his show

74. and the restaurant's suing him for a million dollars.

75. Why'd he do it? It just doesn't make sense.

76. That's too bad.

77. I watch Standler's show all the time. He's great.

78. Any idea what would have caused him to go off the deep end?

79. No, but talk about bad timing.

80. He was supposed to be one of the judges

81. for the Annual Laugh-Off Competition tonight.

82. Alfred and I bought tickets.

83. By the way..

84. where is Alfred?

85. One side, mac.

86. I beg your pardon?

87. - Huh? - Ooh, pretty!

88. I want it.

89. Hey, you can't do that.

90. Sure I can, lady.

91. I'm the Pack Rat.

92. And your trash is my treasure.

93. Hey!

94. Hmm, shiny.

95. Security!

96. Oh, no, you don't.

97. Whoa! Dibs on the dummy hand.

98. Good heavens.

99. I've been looking every place for one of these.

100. 'Yes?'

101. - 'Master Bruce?' - Alfred?

102. I think you're needed at Mayfield's right away, sir.

103. There's a man with a gun running amok. He's..

104. A word of advice, mac.

105. Never rat on a rat.

106. 'Alfred?'

107. Alfred!

108. Mmm.

109. You'll get oatmeal and like it.

110. Listen, Eddie, if they expect me

111. to judge that stupid Laugh-Off again

112. they'd better be prepared to pay.

113. Hold on.

114. I got somebody at the door.

115. '... for riddle number'

116. '3-1-7-5-3-7..'

117. - Yeah? - 'Pizza delivery.'

118. I didn't order any pizza.

119. But I'll take it. How much?

120. It's on me.

121. 'Hey!'

122. Okay, everybody, empty your pockets.

123. I want gum wrappers, loose string

124. those little balls of lint.

125. None of that cash stuff.

126. swoosh

127. Hey!

128. What?

129. So it's the rat versus the bat and the brat.

130. Only one will survive and that's gonna be me.

131. Everybody, clear out.

132. thud

133. Ah!

134. Come on out.

135. Huh?

136. Mm-mm-mm.

137. crash

138. zap zap

139. thud

140. 'It's Harry Loomis.'

141. Another famous comedian.

142. Look at his neck.

143. 'A microchip?'

144. Mind control.

145. This is beginning to point toward

146. our old friend, the Mad Hatter.

147. Wake up, Jervis.

148. We have to talk.

149. Come on. Rise and shine.

150. 'Wow, he's really out.'

151. Here's what we know.

152. Someone implants the Mad Hatter

153. with one of his own mind-control devices.

154. Then does the same thing to two comedians.

155. But what's the connection?

156. Looks like it's three comedians now, sir.

157. "TV personality Lisa Lorraine was abducted

158. 'from her apartment early this evening."'

159. 'And here's our common link.'

160. This comedy competition.

161. Sure, Buddy Harry

162. and Lisa judge it every year.

163. Remember, we taped the last one.

164. Right here, Master Dick.

165. And I've cued it to something you should see.

166. Well, that's it for our contestants.

167. Now, our panel of distinguished judges will choose

168. 'the funniest person in Gotham.'

169. Not so fast, chuckles.

170. You haven't introduced me yet.

171. Smilin' Shecky Rimshot. Badam bom.

172. Come on, already.

173. Good evening, ladies and germs.

174. 'Hey, did you hear about the guy'

175. walked into a doctor's office

176. with a frog on his head?

177. Doctor says, "That's the weirdest-looking wart

178. I've ever seen."

179. Frog looks up and says

180. "Yeah, I woke up this morning

181. there was a big bump on my butt."

182. Hey, then there's this guy who buys a new dog.

183. 'He takes it for a walk and the friend says..'

184. buzz

185. Huh?

186. Sorry, pal.

187. We've already made our decision.

188. And for your information, registration closed days ago.

189. I'm not leavin' until I get that trophy.

190. Oh, yes, you are.

191. You can't do this to me.

192. 'I'm the greatest comic in Gotham.'

193. I'll get even.

194. I'll ruin you all! Huh!

195. 'Freeze it right there.'

196. I think I see what you mean, Alfred.

197. Without the hat..

198. '... and different hair..'

199. 'The Joker!'

200. I tell you, Maury, I'm dyin' here. I got a full house.

201. And all three of my celebrity judges

202. are either missin' or in jail.

203. You gotta find me some replacements quick.

204. Ask and ye shall receive.

205. 'What in the..'

206. Permit me to introduce

207. Judges Knuckles, Vinnie and Kowalski.

208. They'll be presenting me with the trophy tonight.

209. Hey, listen, you can't just walk in here and take..

210. 'Oh, but I already have.'

211. thud

212. 'These little microchips are a wonder.'

213. Remind me to thank the Mad Hatter, if he ever wakes up.

214. Ha!

215. 'Hey, start the show already!'

216. Let's go already!

217. Ladies and gentlemen

218. welcome to the tenth Annual Gotham Laugh-Off.

219. And now, it is my deepest honor

220. to present to you the evening's first and only contestant

221. Smilin' Shecky Rimshot.

222. Hey, folks, you're beautiful.

223. Funny thing happened to me

224. on the way to the theater last year.

225. It seems three no-talent hacks

226. tried to stop me from winning.

227. But guess what?

228. I'm back!

229. Oh, such unhappy faces.

230. Judges, let's cheer them up.

231. My high-octane laughing gas

232. will have you rolling in the aisles.

233. swoosh

234. crash

235. It's just you and us, Joker.

236. Not quite, Batman.

237. I've got a new girl

238. and she'll really sweep you off your feet.

239. Lisa Lorraine?

240. Call me Mighty Mom!

241. Ain't she sweet?

242. Ha! My very own happy homemaker.

243. But I don't do windows.

244. Not bad.

245. Honey, why don't you show our pals how you clean house.

246. In other words..

247. mop 'em up.

248. thud

249. Who's first to get dusted?

250. Think you can get the brain patch off her?

251. No problem.

252. - Hey! - Naughty boy.

253. - Mama spank. Ah! Ah!

254. What did I tell you about playing

255. with your toys in the house?

256. - Get rid of it! - You're the boss.

257. swoosh

258. Oh!

259. No. Not on my nice clean floor.

260. 'Just hold still.'

261. 'Ow! That hurts.'

262. Don't worry. I'm back to normal.

263. Who can tell?

264. Ho-hoo!

265. 'Stay back.'

266. You've hit a new low, Joker.

267. Only you would ruin three lives

268. for a silly piece of tin.

269. You're dumber than you look, Bats.

270. It's not the trophy that matters, it's the title.

271. I am the greatest clown

272. this dismal burg has ever seen.

273. What would the common folk do without my pranks and antics?

274. Let's find out.

275. Up, up and away!

276. swoosh

277. Whoa! No, quit rocking the boat.

278. Oh, too bad, Bat sap.

279. Well, you should have remembered the old saying

280. "Dying is easy, comedy is hard."

281. clang

282. clang

283. 'Mind if I join the party?'

284. Ugh.

285. 'Ow! You miserable brat.'

286. Ugh. Ah!

287. Get this stupid thing off me.

288. boom

289. Oops!

290. Watch it.

291. I think I'm getting airsick.

292. I'll get you for this, Batman.

293. No one upstages me and lives!

294. Is there a problem, officers?

295. Ha.

296. What's so funny, huh?

297. I'll give you something to laugh about.

298. Come on, you..

299. thud