1. Are you getting paranoid?Copy !req
2. You're paranoid, huh?Copy !req
3. No. I just don't think
you're gonna like it up there.Copy !req
4. Where, Helen?Copy !req
5. I've been there before.Copy !req
6. Fourth grade. Field trip.Copy !req
7. Tamika Rich threw up.Copy !req
8. No, the festivities, Fastnacht.Copy !req
9. It's really traditional.Copy !req
10. Oh. Well,Copy !req
11. if we don't like it, we can
just go back to the lodge,Copy !req
12. and do lodge stuff.Copy !req
13. "Lodge stuff"?Copy !req
14. Yeah, lodge stuff.Copy !req
15. I know it sounds gross,Copy !req
16. but it's pretty much what
we were doing this morning.Copy !req
17. And you'll be high, so you'll
have more tongue confidence.Copy !req
18. You notice that?Copy !req
19. Now I'm paranoid.Copy !req
20. This is gonna sound like a
high question, but it's not.Copy !req
21. Got it.Copy !req
22. Are black women considered brunettes?Copy !req
23. Is it weird that made me hungry?Copy !req
24. You, too?Copy !req
25. Oh, shit.Copy !req
26. This is nice.Copy !req
27. We're gonna be the only
black people here, aren't we?Copy !req
28. Christina's half.Copy !req
29. The important thing
is the Faschingstanz,Copy !req
30. and make sure you mix in
some actual dance movesCopy !req
31. with the traditional
ones. They'll love that.Copy !req
32. - All right.
- We're gonna win for sure.Copy !req
33. Christina's gonna be so mad,Copy !req
34. 'cause Dave can't dance for shit.Copy !req
35. I'm not that great, either.Copy !req
36. I don't know. You got some swag.Copy !req
37. It's weird swag, but people like it.Copy !req
38. Oh, by the way, traditionally,
there's a moor characterCopy !req
39. that people show up in blackface, so...Copy !req
40. - Great.
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
41. When you were a kid,
didn't you feel, like,Copy !req
42. weird about all that?Copy !req
43. Hmm, I used to.Copy !req
44. But I'm kind of like the Serena
Williams of the festivities.Copy !req
45. They hate, but they
can't deny the stats.Copy !req
46. You're so competitive.Copy !req
47. I know. And you love it.Copy !req
48. Hey, baby.Copy !req
49. Hey!Copy !req
50. - Oh, my God. Hi.
- It is so good to see you.Copy !req
51. - What's up, Van? How are you?
- Hey, Dave.Copy !req
52. I'm good. Ha, look.Copy !req
53. - Hey, yo!
- Amazing.Copy !req
54. - That looks good.
- Love it.Copy !req
55. - Look at you.
- Look, I told you she'd dress up.Copy !req
56. Earn.Copy !req
57. Earn!Copy !req
58. You want to take our picture?Copy !req
59. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, um...
- Huh.Copy !req
60. There we go.Copy !req
61. - I took three.
- Thank you.Copy !req
62. Where is your costume?Copy !req
63. Oh, yeah. That's not me.Copy !req
64. I'm not really into...Copy !req
65. Y-Yeah, but you got to dress up, man.Copy !req
66. I mean, like, why are you here?Copy !req
67. - Look at me. I'm wearing lederhosen, dawg.
- Yeah.Copy !req
68. I-I get it. I don't know.Copy !req
69. Van likes it.Copy !req
70. - Where-where'd she go, though?
- Yo.Copy !req
71. - I got a spare mask in the whip.
- I'm...Copy !req
72. - I'm all right, man.
- You sure?Copy !req
73. - I'm sure, man.
- You'd look good in it.Copy !req
74. I feel good like this.Copy !req
75. What the hell is that?Copy !req
76. It's a Schnappviecher.
It's a demon thief.Copy !req
77. Every Fastnacht, he steals somethingCopy !req
78. from one unlucky villager.Copy !req
79. No way!Copy !req
80. You look so good!Copy !req
81. Oh.Copy !req
82. You look great... and I'm sorry.Copy !req
83. Where's that mask you
were talking about?Copy !req
84. Yeah, it's in the whip.Copy !req
85. Cool.Copy !req
86. Welcome to another Fastnacht.Copy !req
87. Here, take these, please.Copy !req
88. - Game on.
- Thank you.Copy !req
89. We've got some excellent prizes tonight,Copy !req
90. provided by Dixie Gas.Copy !req
91. Big shout-out to Dixie Gas
for these two movie gift cards.Copy !req
92. And I don't know about the rest of you,Copy !req
93. but I'm ready to Hootz-Kutz.Copy !req
94. Just bounce the ball
to me when it comes,Copy !req
95. but don't say "Hootz-Kutz"
unless you have to. Okay.Copy !req
96. - He's never played.
- Okay, okay.Copy !req
97. Are we ready to Hootz-Kutz?Copy !req
98. Yeah!Copy !req
99. On-on my count. Ready,Copy !req
100. set, go.Copy !req
101. - Oh!
- Come on, Earn.Copy !req
102. You're supposed to catch it, okay?Copy !req
103. - I'm sorry. All right, sorry.
- It's okay.Copy !req
104. Go.Copy !req
105. There it is!Copy !req
106. We're supposed to pass them.Copy !req
107. - Don't just...
- Oh, my God!Copy !req
108. Switch!Copy !req
109. Hold, hold.Copy !req
110. Thank you.Copy !req
111. Earn, you're just standing there, dude.Copy !req
112. Earn.Copy !req
113. - Earn, don't just stand there.
- Earn.Copy !req
114. What'd you... whoa, whoa. Whoa.Copy !req
115. Whoa. That was crazy.Copy !req
116. How'd you do that?Copy !req
117. I just put the...Copy !req
118. I just held the balls
and put them in the jug.Copy !req
119. Shh, no, no. No, hold on.Copy !req
120. I've been playing Hootz-KutzCopy !req
121. since I was a little kid, and I've...Copy !req
122. I've never seen anyone do that.Copy !req
123. Shit, dude.Copy !req
124. No, seriously, man.
How-how did you do that?Copy !req
125. I just held the balls
and-and put them in the jug.Copy !req
126. Oh, my goodness.Copy !req
127. Earnest "Halten" Marks!Copy !req
128. Give it up for Earn!Copy !req
129. Earn! Earn!Copy !req
130. Earn! Earn! Earn! Earn! Earn!Copy !req
131. What's "halten"?Copy !req
132. It just means "to hold."Copy !req
133. You really should learn German.Copy !req
134. Yeah, I know. It's so useful.Copy !req
135. You got lucky as fuck back there.Copy !req
136. You should listen to me next time.Copy !req
137. You're starting to sound more
like Serena Williams's dad.Copy !req
138. Hello.Copy !req
139. What can I get you?Copy !req
140. - Wow.
- Uh...Copy !req
141. No.Copy !req
142. Okay.Copy !req
143. Did you understand that?Copy !req
144. No.Copy !req
145. Okay.Copy !req
146. The mask, maybe...?Copy !req
147. Mm... yeah.Copy !req
148. Ding, ding. How about some service?Copy !req
149. Wow.Copy !req
150. Here you go.Copy !req
151. There's always gonna be more girls, man.Copy !req
152. I get that, but...Copy !req
153. But how are you supposed
to know what you wantCopy !req
154. the rest of your life right now?Copy !req
155. Sometimes I feel like
she wants me to be lame.Copy !req
156. I mean, like, this
isn't me. I mean, like...Copy !req
157. You know, I don't know, maybe she wantsCopy !req
158. a guy who could speak German.
You know what I'm say...Copy !req
159. A guy who enjoys dancing to polka music.Copy !req
160. I'm not that dude.Copy !req
161. I-I don't know why she wants me
to pretend like I'm that dude.Copy !req
162. Well, she just, you know, wants
to spend more time with you,Copy !req
163. and that's what girls
do when they like you.Copy !req
164. They just want to twist
their life up with yours.Copy !req
165. That way, it's harder to disconnect.Copy !req
166. - Hey.
- Hey.Copy !req
167. Um, so, the guys are
dancing in three minutes.Copy !req
168. You want to go over some moves?Copy !req
169. Yeah, actually, let's
go over here for a sec.Copy !req
170. Okay.Copy !req
171. Ping-Pong.Copy !req
172. No. This is obviously a
traditional Pingen-Pong...Copy !req
173. - tablisch...
- Tischtennisplatte.Copy !req
174. - Yeah, that's what I said.
- Mm-hmm.Copy !req
175. Yeah, I was just thinkingCopy !req
176. we could spend some
one-on-one time together.Copy !req
177. Can we spend some
one-on-one time dancing?Copy !req
178. It's just one game.Copy !req
179. Come on. It's the
only white game I know.Copy !req
180. Okay. But one game.Copy !req
181. If I win,Copy !req
182. no more complaining.Copy !req
183. We danceCopy !req
184. and my name is on the
front of the trophy.Copy !req
185. - Fair.
- Okay.Copy !req
186. - And if I win...
- Mm...Copy !req
187. - Come on.
- Oh.Copy !req
188. - Mm, mm. Mm-hmm.
- Okay, well,Copy !req
189. don't be upset when you're
in a weird sexual position.Copy !req
190. You need a warm-up? Come on.Copy !req
191. Let's go. Best out of three.Copy !req
192. Ready?Copy !req
193. - Okay.
- Ready?Copy !req
194. Baby, I thought you used to play.Copy !req
195. Yeah, okay.Copy !req
196. Come on.Copy !req
197. Come on, Serena. Let's
do it. You got it.Copy !req
198. Fuck.Copy !req
199. That's two out of three, baby.Copy !req
200. Mm-hmm. Come on.Copy !req
201. Let's go dancing. It's match point.Copy !req
202. Why'd you do that?Copy !req
203. What're you talking
about? This was your idea.Copy !req
204. Yeah, but when we play basketball,Copy !req
205. I don't just destroy you
in front of everybody.Copy !req
206. There's nobody here.
They're all dancing.Copy !req
207. Oh, my God.Copy !req
208. I'm sorry. Was he here the whole time?Copy !req
209. He was standing right next to me?Copy !req
210. Let's go. Come on. You lost. Let's go.Copy !req
211. I'm-I'm not in the mood.Copy !req
212. Seriously?Copy !req
213. You're being a fucking baby.Copy !req
214. Fine. I'll do it if I fucking have to.Copy !req
215. This is typical.Copy !req
216. - Whatever.
- Wait. Hold up. I'm sorry. What?Copy !req
217. I said I'll do it if we fucking have to.Copy !req
218. You don't have to do shit.Copy !req
219. We do your shit all the fucking time.Copy !req
220. We went to a strip club.Copy !req
221. - You liked the strip club.
- I liked going to a strip club?Copy !req
222. I'm a woman. I need to go
fucking look at titties?Copy !req
223. - Then just say you don't enjoy it.
- No.Copy !req
224. - You didn't like that.
- I want to just spend time with you.Copy !req
225. - It doesn't matter to me.
- Well, I was tryingCopy !req
226. - to fucking spend time with you.
- I wanted to go dancing.Copy !req
227. It's fucking stupid.Copy !req
228. I don't like it.Copy !req
229. But you can't do it for me?Copy !req
230. I'm not trying to go to
fucking Alfred's concertsCopy !req
231. every fucking weekend.Copy !req
232. I wouldn't shit on that.Copy !req
233. That's paying your fucking bills.Copy !req
234. Wow.Copy !req
235. Yeah.Copy !req
236. You can be real mean, man.Copy !req
237. Fuck you.Copy !req
238. Where'd Earn go?Copy !req
239. Ugh. He's being a baby.Copy !req
240. I don't understand what...Copy !req
241. he wants from me.Copy !req
242. - Christina. Oh, my God.
- Oh! Hi.Copy !req
243. - How are you, Flo?
- It's so good to see you. So good!Copy !req
244. - I'm so glad you're here.
- What's going on?Copy !req
245. Oh, just everything.Copy !req
246. - Yeah?
- I know. It's so good to see you.Copy !req
247. - It's so good to see you, too.
- Did you see Jen here?Copy !req
248. I vaguely remember. I think I saw her.Copy !req
249. - Oh, my God.
- Oh! Oh.Copy !req
250. This is Flo. Flo, this is Lottie's mom.Copy !req
251. Oh, my God.Copy !req
252. So nice to finally meet you.Copy !req
253. - Mm-hmm.
- Kai is in love with Lottie.Copy !req
254. She's just so polite and
sweet when she's at our house.Copy !req
255. Oh. She better be.Copy !req
256. Uh, hi. I'm Tek.Copy !req
257. - It's nice to meet you.
- You, too.Copy !req
258. Babe, this is Lottie's mom.Copy !req
259. - Right. Okay, Earn's girl.
- Yes.Copy !req
260. - Yes.
- Right. Yeah, I've heard a lot about you.Copy !req
261. You know, Earn's making
some really cool movesCopy !req
262. with Paper Boi. People
are really impressed.Copy !req
263. - Thank you.
- So...Copy !req
264. Tek hears all the tea at the label.Copy !req
265. Yeah, a lot of tea.Copy !req
266. I handle his publishing.Copy !req
267. So, do you work with Earn,Copy !req
268. or you an artist?Copy !req
269. No, I'm sort of in
between things right now.Copy !req
270. I stay at home mostly.Copy !req
271. Oh, she used to be a teacher.Copy !req
272. - Oh, that's great.
- Yeah.Copy !req
273. You're so lucky.Copy !req
274. - Thank you.
- Yeah.Copy !req
275. Babe. What's going on?Copy !req
276. - Wait. W-W-Wait.
- I just need a drink.Copy !req
277. No. No, no, no, no, no.Copy !req
278. Let-Let's sit down.Copy !req
279. Let's sit... No, no, no, seriously.Copy !req
280. Come. Sit down.Copy !req
281. It's gonna be fine.Copy !req
282. What's going on?Copy !req
283. I don't know why you
have to introduce meCopy !req
284. as Lottie's mom.Copy !req
285. - You know my first name.
- Yeah, but...Copy !req
286. And that's not all that I'm gonna beCopy !req
287. for the rest of my
life, is Lottie's mom.Copy !req
288. Of course not. I know that.Copy !req
289. But you make that shit look good.Copy !req
290. Like, it's different for you.Copy !req
291. What do you... what do you mean?Copy !req
292. You know, it just seems like somethingCopy !req
293. that you're more ready for.Copy !req
294. - What do you mean?
- Because...Copy !req
295. you know, like, you chose Earn.Copy !req
296. I chose Dave.Copy !req
297. Mm-hmm.Copy !req
298. Yeah, like, since we were kids.Copy !req
299. Like, I chose white.Copy !req
300. You chose black. Like, it's...Copy !req
301. Okay.Copy !req
302. - No.
- You... Yeah.Copy !req
303. I didn't choose black.Copy !req
304. Yes, you did.Copy !req
305. You never hung out with me and MelanieCopy !req
306. when we invited you.Copy !req
307. And you only went to the black parties.Copy !req
308. I mean...Copy !req
309. it's like you needed that identity.Copy !req
310. Yeah, but you...Copy !req
311. But Melanie was never nice to me.Copy !req
312. Well, I mean,Copy !req
313. you never invited me to your parties.Copy !req
314. That's because, um,Copy !req
315. you always acted like
you were better than us,Copy !req
316. and you would pander to usCopy !req
317. and say shit like, "I
wish I had kinky hair."Copy !req
318. Which you do. You
just... you straighten it.Copy !req
319. So it's, like, weird
to... it's weird to say.Copy !req
320. - Do you know what I mean?
- I didn't, and I thinkCopy !req
321. - you're going way too far.
- What?Copy !req
322. - Like, seriously?
- You literally just told meCopy !req
323. that I'm gonna be a baby mama,Copy !req
324. and that's okay because I "chose black."Copy !req
325. Well, of course...Copy !req
326. - Are you serious?
- Babe!Copy !req
327. We won, babe!Copy !req
328. - Will you take a pic? My phone's died.
- Yeah.Copy !req
329. Yay.Copy !req
330. Shit. I don't know where my phone is.Copy !req
331. I thought I had it.Copy !req
332. - I just had it.
- For real? Really?Copy !req
333. - Yeah.
- Did someone get Schnapped?Copy !req
334. It is now the witching hour.Copy !req
335. Who here has been struckCopy !req
336. - by the Schnappviecher?
- Right here!Copy !req
337. Right here!Copy !req
338. Wudeljagd!Copy !req
339. Wudeljagd!Copy !req
340. Wudeljagd, Wudeljagd!Copy !req
341. Wudeljagd, Wudeljagd, Wudeljagd!Copy !req
342. Okay.Copy !req
343. Hello?Copy !req
344. Hi.Copy !req
345. You find it?Copy !req
346. Uh-huh.Copy !req
347. Vanessa Keifer is this year's warrior!Copy !req
348. You want a rematch?Copy !req
349. What do you want?Copy !req
350. A rematch.Copy !req
351. I mean in our relationship.Copy !req
352. This feels like a trap.Copy !req
353. It's not a trap.Copy !req
354. No bullshit. What do you want?Copy !req
355. You want me to go first?Copy !req
356. Please.Copy !req
357. I want to be...Copy !req
358. in a committed relationshipCopy !req
359. where I'm valued as a human beingCopy !req
360. and not as an accessory
that you can fuck.Copy !req
361. That's a good answer.Copy !req
362. Um...Copy !req
363. I don't know what I want. I...Copy !req
364. I know this... arrangement works for me.Copy !req
365. So it works for you.Copy !req
366. So, you don't want to change anything?Copy !req
367. This definitely feels like a trap.Copy !req
368. I don't want to keep
having this conversation.Copy !req
369. I'm really tired.Copy !req
370. Well, we don't have to
have this conversation now.Copy !req
371. We can talk about it in the morning.Copy !req
372. Well, I don't want to keep
waiting around for you.Copy !req
373. And I don't want you to
waste any more of your time.Copy !req
374. Then let's settle it.Copy !req
375. If I win,Copy !req
376. you only have to see me if
it's about Lottie or money.Copy !req
377. That's not what I meant.Copy !req
378. Then beat me.Copy !req
379. I don't see what this is gonna prove.Copy !req
380. It's gonna prove that I'm tired.Copy !req
381. All right.Copy !req
382. Best of five.Copy !req
383. Sorry.Copy !req
384. Um, I'll pick up Lottie
from my mom's house.Copy !req
385. Tomorrow.Copy !req
386. All right. Bye.Copy !req