Atlanta 1x6

Directed by Donald Glover

Van meets her WAG friend Jayde for dinner and they clash over their respective lifestyles. Later, they smoke weed and reconcile, but Van forgets she is scheduled for a drug test the next day. She tries to use her daughter's urine, but spills it and finally admits to her boss that she's smoked, who understands but has to fire her.

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1. Would you like a drink while you wait?

2. Uh, yeah, just a little more water, please.

3. Van.

4. Hi, baby.

5. How are you?

6. Oh, it's good to see you.

7. Oh, you too, honey.

8. You smell good.

9. - What is that? - It's Boucheron.

10. Oh, okay.

11. I'm gonna try that.

12. It smells good.

13. - I'm sorry I'm late. - No, no, no.

14. I know you're a working girl. Don't worry, it's fine.

15. It's good to see you. You look really good.

16. Oh, thank you. You too.

17. - Yeah, I like your hair. - Really?

18. - Yeah, yeah, it's cute. - Thanks.

19. Looks better than the last time.

20. Did you go to that shop I told you to go to?

21. - Fernando's? - No.

22. I went to this place that I found in Midtown.

23. Yeah, you should've went to Fernando's.

24. Girl, I'm telling you, he's the best.

25. He's the best.

26. - He will fix those roots. - Hmm.

27. - Mm-hmm. - How much does Fernando charge?

28. - Oh, well, he ain't cheap. - Okay.

29. Well, who's paying for yours?

30. Because I actually have to pay for mine.

31. Van, come on.

32. Come on.

33. I don't know if you remember what that's actually like.

34. Okay, okay. Okay.

35. Good evening, ladies.

36. Can I get you anything else to drink?

37. Yeah, actually, I would like some wine maybe.

38. Like a Chardonnay.

39. Why don't we do, like, a bottle of something?

40. Do you have something sweet?

41. - Riesling's good. - Okay, yeah.

42. Let's do a bottle of that.

43. Van, good? Great. Okay.

44. - Are you two ready to order? - Yeah, um...

45. - I mean, I am, if you are. - Yeah, it's fine.

46. I just didn't want to hold us up.

47. No, it's fine, don't worry about it, go ahead.

48. I'm gonna have the pad Thai with chicken.

49. - Excellent. - Okay.

50. And, um, I'll go ahead and do the snapper

51. and snake bean salad.

52. - Great choice. - Yup, great.

53. - Thanks. - Be right back.

54. Thank you.

55. Oh, Van.

56. I'm so glad I got to catch you.

57. Yeah, I know. I know.

58. - When do you leave tomorrow? - 9:00.

59. - Oh. - Yeah.

60. Damn, that's a short trip.

61. When did you get in? You got in, what, yesterday?

62. - No, day before yesterday. - You flew Delta?

63. No, private.

64. - Oh.

65. I mean, yeah.

66. Yeah, but it wasn't, like, the nice p.j.,

67. it was like one of those rent-a-p.j.'s.

68. I'm leaving on Delta, though.

69. - Oh. - Mm-hmm.

70. Where you gonna go? You gonna go home?

71. Uh, no well, back to New York,

72. check out this apartment I like

73. and then to London.

74. - London? - Yep.

75. - Wow. - Yeah.

76. And you're gonna go with a friend, or—

77. No, just a special NBA player friend.

78. Okay.

79. I got it, but it's not the same NBA player...

80. - Oh, no, girl. - That you're visiting here?

81. No, mm-mm, no. Mm-hmm.

82. I mean, London's okay, I guess.

83. Just too much rain.

84. Makes my hair frizzy.

85. Oh, but I love Paris.

86. Girl, have you been?

87. I went last month.

88. Look, let me show you.

89. Okay, look, look.

90. There I go in Versailles, looking like...

91. looking like black Marie Antoinette.

92. It's beautiful.

93. - Yeah. - You look beautiful.

94. You know, you should come with me next time.

95. - Girl. - It'll be fun.

96. - It'll be fun! - I have a daughter.

97. - I can't leave. - Oh.

98. That's cute.

99. You know, sometimes I wish I had a kid, but then I'm like,

100. ugh, God no.

101. You know, I guess when the time is right, I'll have a kid.

102. Yeah, I'm sure.

103. I'm sure as soon as you find the right guy.

104. - Yeah, the right guy. - Mm-hmm.

105. I guess.

106. - So how have you been? - So, how's your mom?

107. - Sorry. - I'm sorry.

108. You go, I'm sorry.

109. How've you been? I haven't seen you.

110. I'm, um, I'm busy.

111. - Yeah? - I'm busy.

112. I'm good.

113. Well, you look great.

114. - You do, I'm serious. - Thank you.

115. Oh, I ran into Kerry Clopton.

116. You remember her, from fifth grade?

117. - Yeah. - You know, the girl.

118. She look like she got a rake dragged across her face.

119. On Facebook, it said she was in a car accident.

120. Here we are.

121. You know, can I actually get

122. some chopsticks when you get a chance?

123. - Um... - Of course.

124. Yeah, I don't think we got any.

125. - Chopsticks? - What?

126. Thai people don't use chopsticks.

127. I mean, well, Americans think they do

128. because they're Asian, but they don't.

129. - I just like chopsticks. - Oh, okay.

130. Okay.

131. So what are you doing after this?

132. This dude I know, he's having some, like, listening party—

133. It sounds cool, but I can't. I have Lottie.

134. Oh, come on, Grandma. Come on, it'll be fun.

135. I also have work in the morning.

136. Yeah, and I have a flight.

137. - Look, call Earn... - I'm not calling Earn.

138. And then have—why?

139. I don't know, he's busy.

140. Yeah, I see his Snapchat sometimes, and he looks...

141. he looks busy.

142. Wait, are you...

143. are you still seeing him?

144. We have a daughter.

145. I mean, I still go out, but— is he living with you?

146. When he can afford to, yes.

147. Mmm.

148. Y'all are funny.

149. You two are funny.

150. Oh, okay.

151. I mean, you used to make fun of girls like you.

152. You realize that, right?

153. No, I'm serious, Van.

154. You know, you really need to think about your value.

155. - I'm sorry? - Like, what is your value?

156. Wait, what are you asking me right now?

157. Like, why are you messing around

158. with this broke-ass nigga?

159. - Whatever. - Van.

160. I know what my worth is. I don't want to be out here

161. dating a million football players—that's your style.

162. Hey, hey, look.

163. Women need to be valuable.

164. Black women have to be valuable.

165. Come on, the NBA players I fuck with,

166. they fuck with me because I provide a service,

167. and I am worth it.

168. I am cultured, intelligent, and beautiful.

169. And that is hard—Van!

170. Look at me. That is hard to come by.

171. That kind of black and white mentality might work for you,

172. but for those of us who don't live on whether a linebacker

173. - swipes left or right... - That's not what I'm talking—

174. On my goddamn ass, then there's a gray area.

175. Stop, Van, he's running around on you, girl.

176. - Oh, so what? - What you mean, "So what"?

177. So what? You don't think that I'm going out on dates?

178. You don't think that I'm running around?

179. You don't think that I ever decline his calls

180. because I have some guy wrapped around me

181. with his tongue down my throat?

182. I mean, come on! Really?

183. Here we go.

184. Enjoy.

185. Oh, Kevin's here.

186. - Wait, what? - Kevin's here.

187. He's taking us to the listening launch.

188. Jayde.

189. He's got a friend for you, too.

190. Cute.

191. - Hey, baby, how you doing? - Wait, what?

192. - Hey, boo. - Come on, sit down.

193. - This is my boy, CJ. - Hey.

194. - How's it going? - Hi.

195. Dang, you looking good.

196. - You too. - Well, listen.

197. - Um, y'all finished, though? - Yeah.

198. 'Cause we're gonna get ready and get out of here.

199. - I'll take the check. - Okay.

200. So, hey, sweetheart.

201. What's your name?

202. Vanessa.

203. Vanessa. Okay, okay.

204. Well, you're looking beautiful.

205. I'm talking fine like shine, girl.

206. I'm gonna go to the bathroom, okay?

207. Wait, wait, you're gonna take your jacket to the bathroom?

208. Mm-hmm.

209. She's...

210. It's a girl thing.

211. Hey, pretty girl.

212. Hi.

213. I'm sorry.

214. Van, I'm sorry.

215. I just wanted to hang out with my girl tonight,

216. and I messed up.

217. I did, okay? I know I did.

218. I'm sorry, please don't leave.

219. It's fine, have fun being valuable.

220. Come on, let's just go to this listening party

221. for, like, five minutes.

222. I told you, I don't feel like it.

223. It'll be like old times.

224. Exactly.

225. And do you remember that, in old times,

226. you always used to hook me up with the uglier dudes?

227. Oh, my God.

228. Okay, CJ is not that bad.

229. Seriously, I mean, yeah, he's like—

230. he's like a lawyer or something.

231. I think.

232. I'm more valuable than that shit.

233. You know what? Hold on.

234. Look what I got you.

235. Mm-mm.

236. I got this just for you.

237. I know you want it. Yes, you do.

238. - No. - Yes.

239. - Hell no. - Yes—hell yes.

240. I have work in the morning.

241. No, get your raggedy purse-having ass

242. in this car right now.

243. Come on! Get in this car.

244. Get in this car! You—get in here!

245. - Yes.

246. Yes.

247. Yup.

248. What about your friend?

249. Man, fuck them niggas.

250. He can wait.

251. He wants me high.

252. Believe me.

253. - What? - Shit.

254. What? Come on.

255. Is this that elephant shit you gave me at Rihanna?

256. Mm-hmm.

257. Bitch, it might be.

258. Oh, man.

259. - Wait. Oh, wait, wait. - Give me.

260. Take a picture of me real fast.

261. Take a picture of me real fast.

262. I'm gonna show you something. Wait.

263. Mm.

264. - You want flash, right? - Mm-hmm.

265. - Mm, mm. - Girl, hold on.

266. - Go up. - All right.

267. Oh, no, no, no, no, no. I look like—

268. - Girl. - I look like I'm fat.

269. Come on now.

270. Delete— erase it.

271. You look like an Instagram escort.

272. You should be proud of that shit.

273. I love you, Van.

274. I love you.

275. - I know.

276. Oh, fuck.

277. - Hello? - Jayde, I'm fucked.

278. My whole life is fucked.

279. Okay, your whole life is not fucked.

280. - What happened? - I have a drug test today.

281. Girl, you smoked yesterday.

282. - Girl, I'm being serious! - Me, too.

283. I don't know the protocol for this.

284. I never had a job where smoking wasn't encouraged.

285. I don't know, can you ask someone?

286. Yeah, let me ask a friend from the Hawks.

287. I mean, they get tested, and he smokes nonstop.

288. Can you hurry? Because I got to be at work in two hours.

289. I'll hurry, all right?

290. I got you. Bye.

291. Shit.

292. Hey. It's me.

293. Hey, what's up?

294. Hey.

295. What's wrong? You look weird.

296. I'm tired.

297. - I just had a long night. - Mm-hmm.

298. How's Jayde?

299. She's good.

300. She's going to New York, and then she's going to London.

301. Uh-huh, with who?

302. I can't keep up.

303. Right?

304. Uh, she eat?

305. No, not yet.

306. It's cool, we'll pick something up.

307. You sure? You don't have to do that.

308. No, no, no. It's cool.

309. Maybe you can get, like, an extra hour of sleep in?

310. You'll feel better.

311. - All right. - Yeah.

312. Dispatch, we've got a baby in a residential area,

313. please advise.

314. Yeah, she's adorable, bring backup.

315. - What is that? - I don't know.

316. Hey.

317. Could I get Alfred's number?

318. - Uh, sure. - Thanks.

319. What do you need Al for?

320. Uh, a friend of mine wants to meet him.

321. Oh, uh, is it business?

322. 'Cause if it's business, I could set up that meeting, you know?

323. - A lady friend. - Oh, okay.

324. Matchmaking— that always goes well.

325. Here. I'm taking a shower.

326. Okay.

327. What she doing?

328. I don't know.

329. - What she doing? - I don't know.

330. What she doing?

331. I don't know.

332. King Coco's Crunch-os!

333. The legend is true!

334. Give me that crunch!

335. But only kids can have Coconut Crunch-os!

336. That chocolate-y, coconut crunch in every bite.

337. Oh, I can almost taste it!

338. Oh, I got to have them Crunch-os!

339. Hello?

340. Hey, Alfred, um, it's Van.

341. Okay.

342. Earn ain't here.

343. Yeah, I know.

344. Um...

345. I need your help.

346. All right.

347. I smoked last night.

348. Smoked what?

349. Weed. That thing you sell.

350. Hey, hey, hey, girl, I don't sell shit.

351. You better get off my phone, talkin' that mess.

352. How do you pass a drug test?

353. You smoke?

354. Yes.

355. Alfred, I am allowed to smoke.

356. Well, weed is for people who aren't going anywhere, though.

357. It's, like, for losers.

358. AL Like, remember?

359. Listen, I am calling you because I need your help.

360. Yeah, yeah, but I'm petty, right?

361. I'm Tom Petty.

362. As much as you be getting on my ass about smoking, girl?

363. Alfred, you have to help me.

364. You know good and well that you ain't paying Earn any time soon.

365. Listen, I can't lose my job because I am all that we have.

366. Okay?

367. Look, my man, Bibby, he buys piss from somebody

368. and he put it in a condom and he tape it to his leg.

369. I mean, is there anywhere I could even

370. buy urine at this point?

371. Probably not.

372. Look, I'll ask around for you, all right?

373. All right.

374. - Let me know. AL: Uh-huh.

375. Van.

376. Alicia, hey.

377. You running ISS today?

378. Uh, yes, I'm supposed to. Yeah.

379. I got Tobias right now.

380. You want to know what this boy did?

381. - Jamilah Hall? - Here!

382. - Forrest Hunt? - Here.

383. Tobias Walner?

384. Tobi—

385. - Why was he in white face? - I don't even know.

386. But he gonna get enough of fucking with me.

387. - I know that. - Um...

388. Okay, just send him to Mr. Halford 'cause he loves him.

389. Somebody needs to come get him.

390. I can't do it, Van; I'm not going to jail today.

391. Bring Mr. Halford down, and he will walk him to ISS, okay?

392. Girl, I got to go.

393. He gonna get enough. Watch.

394. Okay. Just...

395. Ugh!

396. Fuck!

397. Vanessa's here.

398. Please send her in.

399. Morning, Ms. Keifer.

400. I wanted to have a quick chat with you.

401. - I didn't receive your sample— - I smoked weed.

402. Okay.

403. Well, urine samples aren't sent off.

404. The county can't afford quarterly drug tests

405. for its employees, so after the first one,

406. they're really just to keep people on their toes.

407. Listen, everybody smokes weed.

408. The system isn't made for these kids to succeed,

409. and you got to shake it off somehow.

410. - I get it.

411. But unfortunately, you have admitted the use

412. of an illegal substance to a superior,

413. so I've got to fire you.

414. To cover my own ass, as well as the school's.

415. You understand.

416. Okay, let's say we had this conversation Friday.

417. That'll give you the week to get your things together, okay?

418. You all right?

419. Come here.

420. Yeah, you are.

421. Whoo!

422. You are loud.

423. I mean, it's all in your hair.

424. Hey, Mike.