1. Now the story of a wealthy family
who lost everything...
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2. and the one son
who had no choice...
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3. but to keep them all together.
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4. It's Arrested Development.
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5. Michael was having brunch with Sally Sitwell.
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6. I still can't believe we got in.
This place is usually so packed on Sundays.
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7. In addition to its Sunday popularity...
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8. the bistro was also famous
for something called the Skip's Scramble-
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9. an egg dish that contained
everything on the menu.
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10. Don't order the Skip's Scramble.
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11. Just more good luck. Everything's been
going so well since we started goin'out.
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12. I think we've actually
gone out eight times now.
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13. Which included a record-tying...
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14. three lovemaking sessions
in one night for Michael.
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15. - Yes!
- Just think...
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16. how different everything in our lives would be
if we'd gotten together in high school.
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17. Of course, I wouldn't
have had George Michael.
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18. We probably would've had
an entirely different kind of child.
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19. I really hope
he's okay with us goin' out.
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20. We're very close.
We don't keep anything from each other.
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21. Oh, no, it's my Dad.
I'm supposed to be at work.
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22. You know, George Michael,
you worry too much.
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23. It's Sunday. You're allowed to
have a couple of hours off.
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24. You don't see me nervous
about being on my third Virgin Mary.
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25. Why would you be nervous?
There's no alcohol in a Virgin Mary.
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26. There isn't?
This is unbelievable.
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27. Can I get a virgin piña colada
when you get a chance?
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28. Now we'll get
things started.
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29. Hi. This is so, uh-
I was just-
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30. Hey, okay.
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31. I want to introduce you to Sally.
This is George Michael.
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32. - My niece, Maeby.
- It's nice to meet you.
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33. I just shut down the banana stand
for a half an hour.
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34. - I can keep it open late tonight if you-
- No. Hey. Come on.
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35. Make me sound like a taskmaster.
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36. But if- if you want to keep it open
an extra hour, you know.
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37. So, this is Sally.
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38. - Is she your girlfriend?
- No.
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39. - Yes!
- A little.
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40. You know what? I'm gonna meet
you in a few minutes, okay?
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41. - Okay.
- And maybe we'll work on
breaking that record, huh?
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42. Okay.
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43. She's a shot-putter.
And I'm dating her.
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44. But I just want to make sure
that you're comfortable with everything.
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45. Well, of course. We could double-date.
You and Sally and me and Ann.
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46. - Who?
- W-Ann.
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47. - Yes. Yes.
- Yeah, we had-
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48. Of course I know Ann.
Yeah, see, I didn't mean "who."
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49. I meant, uh, "her."
That's a great idea.
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50. - I love Ann.
- Great.
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51. Excuse me, ma'am.
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52. George Michael, you said that
you couldn't come to church...
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53. because you were working,
and now you're doing neither?
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54. That's quite a lot of sins
for a Sunday afternoon, don't you think?
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55. - Your virgin piña colada.
- And now you're drinking?
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56. No. We're just having
a little fun, you know.
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57. I think the church
and studying are fun.
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58. - I thought you felt the same.
- Well, I do.
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59. L- I like not having fun.
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60. I like your idea
of fun, I mean.
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61. Our idea of fun.
I like not having that.
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62. I'm going
back to church.
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63. Well, she just
killed my buzz.
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64. So, you're still
enjoying this relationship?
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65. I mean, I guess we've lost some of the heat
since we have kissed.
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66. I mean, how do you
relight that fire?
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67. But I can't break up with her. I always assumed
she would break up with me.
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68. Well, we may have to find
a way to speed that process up.
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69. And later that day,
Michael caught Lindsay up...
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70. on the emotional bond
he was forming with Sally.
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71. Oh, big deal, three times.
I've had three times plenty of times.
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72. Yes!
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73. Did you call my name?
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74. Absolutely not.
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75. I just hope that George Michael
is really okay with it.
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76. I think you're looking
for a reason this isn't going to work...
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77. because you can't handle happiness,
and you like to suffer.
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78. Oh, how delicious!
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79. Oh, hey, let's not spin
in the comfy chair.
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80. Look at this delicious piece of irony.
I'm being sued for divorce.
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81. - Me.
- Thought you were single?
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82. Yeah, I keep forgetting
that I got married.
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83. Gob met a woman one night.
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84. And after a series of
escalating dares, married her.
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85. Yes, but it's all
coming back to me now.
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86. She was a seal dealer.
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87. She raised and sold seals to aquariums
and marine parks, that sort of thing.
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88. Then she went off to fight her war
and left me to look after them.
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89. It was while in the service
that her penchant for daring...
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90. found a natural outlet.
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91. I've never known you
to look after a seal.
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92. Turns out it's a major hassle.
Tried to include one in my act once.
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93. There's a reason you don't typically
see live seals in a magic show.
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94. So with a simple wave of my-
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95. Oh, look-it over... there.
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96. Well, one of the "Desperate Housewives,"
looking so desperate.
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97. So I released them from whence they came,
and now she's stomping on my heart.
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98. - What's her first name? Quickly.
- Krindy.
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99. Name's not Krindy, Gob.
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100. Ah, Saul Zentsman.
No, that's her lawyer.
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101. Well, she's got a name.
And I'm gonna find out what it is...
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102. and then I'm gonna make a pun on it,
and that's what I'll call her.
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103. Bad example- if her name's Amy,
I'll call her Blamy.
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104. That's a strong defense.
I'll tell you what.
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105. I'll help you look for Barry tomorrow.
I think Dad prepaid him...
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106. for Lindsay and Tobias's
divorce anyway.
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107. Look at us. Three relationships,
all falling apart.
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108. Maybe it's time we actually
took some responsibility for that.
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109. - I think it's Mom's fault.
- I was gonna say the exact same thing.
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110. No, that's not a spinner.
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111. So this is how my children
speak of me when I'm not here.
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112. - What are you doin' here, Mom?
- Your brother Buster...
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113. wants to meet me
at the beach tomorrow.
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114. Do you know what this is about?
Because if it's about going in the ocean...
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115. the answer is
no, he's not going in the ocean.
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116. Well, there are
bigger dangers, Mom.
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117. Like, say, signing him up
for the army during wartime.
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118. What the hell
was I supposed to do?
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119. Michael Moore confronted me
in front of the whole country.
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120. First of all, it wasn't Michael Moore.
It was a look-alike.
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121. And it wasn't in front
of the whole country.
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122. It was for a bit
on Jimmy Kimmel Live.
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123. I don't know who that is,
and I don't care to find out.
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124. But the next day,
she did find out what Buster wanted.
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125. Okay, I think we have enough
of you two kissing.
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126. Oh, I can't believe
you hired a photographer.
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127. We haven't done this since
the Balboa Bay Window magazine.
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128. So, I wanted you to have
a recent picture of me...
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129. because they want to ship me
out tomorrow with army.
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130. What?
To where?
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131. Iraq. And I just
might be out of options.
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132. I don't want to go,
but they keep-
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133. I know what this is about.
You want to go swimming in the ocean.
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134. Well, you can forget it.
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135. - I don't think that's what this is about.
- Yes, it is.
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136. He's trying to punish me
or something.
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137. - Whatever happened to "Keepin' It Fresh"?
- I was 30 years old then, Mother.
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138. I'm 32 now! And I'm not
trying to teach you a lesson.
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139. Well, I may not have
been a perfect mother.
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140. But, you know,
kids don't come with a handbook.
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141. In fact, there are
thousands ofbooks written on child-rearing.
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142. But Lucille was in denial.
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143. If he wants to
go swimming, let him.
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144. And Buster was far from ready
to go swimming in the ocean.
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145. And later, Michael and Gob
tracked down their attorney...
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146. - Barry Zuckerkorn.
- Thank you so much for coming down here.
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147. I've got a big case.
I'm representing Skip Church's restaurant.
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148. - I don't care.
- A waitress that works there is claiming...
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149. that by eating Skip's Scramble
several times a week is making her a fatty.
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150. We need to speak to you
about getting a divorce for Gob.
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151. - Oh, well, I got Michael
out of his marriage, didn't I?
- Actually, she died.
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152. - You're kidding. I've been
taking credit for that for years.
- Credit?
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153. - Who's their lawyer?
- Saul Zentsman. Do you know him?
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154. I have Chinese with him every
Friday night at Miss Temple's.
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155. - He's tough.
- I just want my wife back.
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156. Save it for the stand,
okay, Tom Jane?
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157. Fine. I'll get into this
as soon as I lose this case.
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158. You know who's defending
the fatty? Maggie Lizer.
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159. Maggie Lizer,
our old prosecutor?
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160. Michael had an affair
with Maggie Lizer...
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161. while she was both pretending to be blind
and prosecuting the family.
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162. It was with her he'd first set
the three-time record.
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163. Yes!
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164. Their relationship
ended somewhat abruptly.
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165. - Wow. How does she look?
- Well, she's get-
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166. If you ask me, bigger.
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167. - She was bigger-
- Are you sure you're okay to go on?
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168. Because she was pregnant.
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169. It's not my belly we have to
worry about, Your Honor.
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170. It's Loretta's.
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171. Being tempted day in and day out
by those Skip's Scrambles.
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172. Bring 'em in, boys.
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173. Oh, I'm cooked. They love her.
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174. Tell you the truth,
I preferred it when she was blind.
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175. And so, Michael caught up
with his onetime lover.
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176. How you doin'?
Wow, you look... fantastic.
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177. Wow. Haven't seen you since we had
an affair and you ruined my career.
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178. Yeah, I was gonna call you
a couple of times, and then I just-
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179. I got to thinking, uh,
"What if she brings that up?"
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180. To tell you the truth, I am so relieved
not to be pretending to be blind anymore.
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181. It's actually taught me not to rely
on cheap tricks to get the jury's sympathy.
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182. I'm sorry. I know I'm not
supposed to do this...
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183. but we just spend
so much time in that box.
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184. - I knitted you something.
- Oh, Juror Number Four!
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185. Gosh, thank you. I feel so bad
I fought so hard to keep you off the jury.
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186. - Oh-
- Ms. Lizer, can I see you in my chambers?
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187. Oh. Yes, Your Honor.
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188. In fact,
Judge Ping had a gift for Maggie too-
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189. an Ocean-Sounds Toddler Rocker
he'd asked his bailiff to assemble.
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190. Too bad the trial's not going longer.
She could've knit you something that fit.
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191. I know.
I'm so big now.
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192. No, no, come on.
They look great.
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193. You look great.
You look fantastic.
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194. Last time I saw you was in
that jury box right there, wasn't it?
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195. - Wasn't it like a year ago?
- Oh, Chip, you know what?
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196. Can you take this
back to my house?
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197. Actually, it's been about
eight and a half months.
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198. Eight and a half
months, huh? Wow.
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199. I see somebody has
been counting the, uh-
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200. Eight and a half months. Wow. Really?
Could've sworn it was a year.
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201. Michael had just learned...
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202. that the woman he'd been intimate
with eight and a half months earlier...
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203. was eight-and-a-half
months pregnant.
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204. - Didn't I use something?
- No.
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205. You thought
I was blind, remember?
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206. Don't worry. You're not the father, Michael.
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207. - No problem.
- Really?
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208. - Right.
- You sure? I mean, uh-
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209. I could be. What if I was?
Don't you want to discuss this maybe?
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210. Michael, I haven't
heard from you.
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211. L- I really don't want
to hear from you now.
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212. Listen, if you're interested,
come to the baptism.
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213. You can hurl a Bible
at the baby.
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214. And that night,
Michael met up with Sally...
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215. where he felt he needed
to be honest with her.
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216. Sally...
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217. you need to know
about my child.
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218. George Michael.
He approves.
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219. No, there may be
another child in the mix.
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220. I ran into an ex.
We had a very messed up relationship.
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221. It was based totally on lies.
But she's pregnant.
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222. She said something that led me
to believe that it might be mine.
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223. - But you said she was a liar.
- Sh-She is.
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224. She said it
wasn't mine, so-
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225. - Why are you telling me this?
- Well, because obviously...
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226. if it is my child, I'm gonna
have to be responsible for it...
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227. and that's going to make things
awfully complicated for us.
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228. Michael, you know what? You're always
looking for things to get between us.
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229. First, it was
"What's your son gonna think?"
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230. And now you think
you're having a baby...
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231. because a woman who lies
told you you weren't.
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232. That's a great way to say that. We really do
communicate well, do you know that?
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233. Are you insane?
You broke up with her because...
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234. somebody who doesn't want you
might be pregnant with your baby?
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235. No, Sally broke up with me.
And as for Maggie...
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236. I didn't even know that
she was pregnant when I first saw her.
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237. All I could see was
her giant chest- box.
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238. She had this- Some people
call it a chest. I call it a box.
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239. She was holding this giant box.
Maybe I should've just stayed out of it.
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240. She did make it pretty clear
that she doesn't want me around.
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241. Come on, Michael.
She's probably not even pregnant.
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242. You said she was
carrying a big box?
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243. Pregnant women
tend not to do that.
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244. It did say "60 pounds" on it.
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245. Okay, l-I've done
this wrong.
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246. I should've found out whether it was a real
pregnancy before I told my dream girl about it.
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247. You know what I do, Mike?
Check their urine.
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248. Make 'em pee in a cup,
and pee in a cup right in front of me.
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249. Yeah, well, thanks, Gob. But, uh, I think
we should just keep on lookin'.
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250. I don't know how I can
make that sound like me.
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251. So you get someone to break
into her house, rig the toilet...
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252. collect the pee, test it,
and expose the lie.
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253. I mean, I'd do it, but I'm goin'
through a divorce here, guy.
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254. Oh, a pregnancy test.
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255. There's something we never had,
huh, Lindsay? Oh, no.
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256. We had to create our
little Frankenstein monster...
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257. out of science and money
and just a dash of-
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258. Maeby, what- H-How long
have you been standing there?
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259. - I just walked in.
- Just walked in.
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260. Seems like only yesterday you were
bursting forth from your mother's fertile womb.
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261. You know what? Tobias and I will
break into her house and get the specimen.
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262. - We've been looking for a little excitement.
- Yeah!
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263. It'll be fun. We will be like Tracy and Hepburn.
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264. - "What do you say, you old poop?"
- Oh, God, he's Hepburn.
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265. I am done with Buster.
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266. He pushes my buttons.
That's all he does.
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267. He also zips you up
and sands your elbows.
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268. Not anymore. No, no, no.
He's pretending he's going to war.
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269. Mr. Big Shot. God knows
what he's really doing.
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270. Wait a minute. He said he's
going to war? Aren't you worried?
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271. Oh, you're sounding
like your uncle.
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272. And I've had enough
of his attitude too.
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273. - The boy is going to war.
You're gonna have to face that.
- It's none of your business!
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274. He is my boy!
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275. - I need macaroons.
- Oh, you're high!
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276. Oh, well, you can win every argument like that,
but that does not make you right.
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277. I don't want you telling him
you're his father! I need ice!
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278. Can't you see you're in denial?
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279. - You're high!
- You're drunk!
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280. - Where did Buster say he was going?
- Iraq.
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281. Which is a shot at your father.
Thank God he's not here to hear this.
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282. Excuse me one second.
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283. - It's the pipes.
- You know, Mother Lucille...
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284. there's a psychological
concept...
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285. known as denial that I
believe you're evincing.
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286. It's when a thought
is so hateful...
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287. that the mind
literally rejects it.
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288. You are a worse psychiatrist
than you are a son-in-law...
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289. and you will never
get work as an actor...
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290. because you have no talent.
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291. Well, if she's not going to say anything,
I certainly can't help her.
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292. And Maeby
saw a way to help her cousin.
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293. I know how to get rid of Ann.
You put her in a room with Gangy.
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294. - She'll criticize her away.
- But what would Gangy
have to criticize about Ann?
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295. Oh, George Michael-
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296. In the attic,
Michael met with George Sr...
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297. - who'd overheard about Buster.
- He can't go. You can't let him.
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298. I command you.
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299. I really hate it when
you put on the God costume.
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300. George Sr.
Had always worn the God costume...
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301. at the annual
Living Classics Pageant...
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302. where he and Buster re-created
Michelangelo's The Creation of Adam.
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303. What if I never get a chance to reach out
and touch that hand of his again?
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304. - I gotta go to him.
- Pop, you're a wanted man.
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305. You cannot risk leaving
the attic all the time.
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306. Oh, when? When have I
ever left the attic?
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307. Two days ago. Right? Saw you
floating around the Ford dealership.
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308. Yeah, well, have you seen
the new Ford Mustang?
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309. You could hump that hood.
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310. And Michael
set the plan in motion to get...
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311. - Maggie out ofher house.
- Hi, Maggie.
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312. - Are you blind again?
- For the pizza guy.
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313. I give him a five.
I tell him to keep the change.
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314. What are you doin' here,
Michael? I'm with a client.
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315. - Is that the pizza?
- No!
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316. You'll get your pizza.
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317. She's taking the stand tomorrow.
I want to make sure it creaks.
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318. There's so much I don't
understand about the law.
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319. Look, Maggie, if this child is mine,
I really need to know.
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320. So can you spare a few minutes for someone
who might be the father of your baby?
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321. Of course I can.
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322. - Okay.
- But it's not you.
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323. Oh, for God's sakes.
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324. Oh, come on!
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325. Fine.
Let me get Miss Fat Ass outta here...
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326. - and I'll meet you in the car.
- Okay.
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327. Meanwhile,
on the other side of Maggie's house...
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328. Lindsay and Tobias were putting
their plan into action.
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329. - I'm cloaking myself in her scent.
- Oh! She's not blind.
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330. Well, she was
when she bought this.
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331. - Oh, my God! That's her!
- Get in the tub!
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332. Buster, meanwhile,
received an unexpected visitor.
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333. I want you to know that
it's okay for you to hide.
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334. A man can hide.
There's a quiet courage in that.
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335. You're a good uncle.
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336. I'm not your uncle.
I'm your father.
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337. - What?
- Shh. Shh. Quiet courage.
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338. Quiet courage.
Hide.
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339. But Buster was confused.
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340. You lied to me.
Uncle Oscar's my father.
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341. He just told me so. And maybe
you're not even my real mother.
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342. For all I know, Lucille 2
is my real mother. Oh!
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343. Buster, you were
never supposed to know.
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344. Oh, yeah? Well, here's something
you should know. I'm going to war!
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345. Buster had just discovered
he'd been lied to by his parents.
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346. I'm going to war!
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347. - You told him you were his father!
- I did no such thing!
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348. - You're high!
- You're drunk!
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349. George.
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350. He must've come here
to say good-bye to Buster.
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351. And that's when
Lucille snapped out ofher denial.
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352. My baby's going to war.
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353. Lindsay and Tobias
were gathering evidence...
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354. that Maggie
was truly pregnant.
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355. And they were
having fun doing it.
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356. That's the first time we were
in the shower since our honeymoon.
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357. And this time, no tears.
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358. Tobias, this is the box that
Michael was talking about. "60 pounds."
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359. But it didn't weigh 60 pounds.
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360. Michael was stalling Maggie,
and they were also having fun.
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361. Sally Sitwell? You know,
I think I had her little play oven.
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362. Yeah, I know. It's a funny name.
But she's a doll.
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363. Yeah, I had one.
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364. If you pull her hair,
she'd cry or something.
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365. This one kinda
does that too.
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366. - Hello.
- We got the pee, and we're gonna get it checked.
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367. But, listen, you should know that
that box that says "60 pounds"-
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368. it's actually
like two pounds.
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369. I think she's pregnant, Michael.
I mean, there's baby stuff here and-
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370. Tobias, stop it.
That's for the baby. It's not-
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371. - We're having a really good time.
- Yeah?
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372. - Well, I kind of am too.
- Bye.
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373. So, no more lies.
Tell me the truth.
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374. If-if that baby is mine,
maybe we're meant to be together.
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375. Of course it is, Michael.
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376. But that's when the Fünkes
discovered what was in the box...
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377. that was so easy to lift.
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378. - That's what it is.
- Okay, the box was light 'cause
it had a fake stomach in it.
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379. It looks like she's faking it.
Oh, God. I hope you get this.
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380. Wait up, please.
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381. And George Michael and Maeby
brought Ann to the penthouse...
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382. in hopes that Lucille
would drive her away.
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383. Isn't Ann great?
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384. - Oh, she's lovely.
- Unfortunately...
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385. she was distracted by
the thought oflosing Buster.
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386. Hey, do you have
any bread pudding?
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387. 'Cause you'd be surprised
how much this one can put away.
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388. - Ha!
- Now that Buster's not here,
there's no one to finish it.
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389. I don't care
if I ever eat again.
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390. You know,
when times are tough...
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391. you can always turn to
the power of prayer.
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392. Here we go.
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393. Show me.
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394. This was a big get for God...
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395. and Michael brought
Maggie home to meet his son.
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396. This is gonna be easy. He's been signing off
on everyone lately. Maybe he called.
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397. Hey, so what's the deal on Zuckerkorn?
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398. 'Cause you know my fat case-
it's really pretty thin.
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399. - Lying, untrustworthy-
- Yeah.
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400. Plus, I heard he
hangs out at rest stops.
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401. No, no. I'm talkin'
about you, Maggie.
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402. I don't know why I'm surprised.
I shouldn't be.
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403. You're a liar.
You lie.
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404. Well, I mean, I heard
he hangs out at rest stops. Okay-
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405. And I keep buying it too. And so maybe
there is something wrong with me.
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406. I thought we were startin'
to trust each other.
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407. I got a message from my sister saying
there's a box at your house with a fat suit in it.
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408. - What've you got?
A different one for each trimester?
- You had your sister...
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409. - break into my house?
- Which one are you wearin' right now?
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410. Is this
the ready-to-burst model?
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411. Now, there's
zero trust here. Good-bye.
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412. It's been fun-
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413. not.
- Michael had hoped
something more dramatic...
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414. would have
come out of his mouth.
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415. Or at least more current.
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416. Oh, you're so right, Michael.
I really can't be trusted.
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417. 'Cause I'm fakin' it-
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418. not.
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419. Hello, Michael.
Well, my wife and I...
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420. finally had the thrill of seeing
a plus sign on a pregnancy test.
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421. You're gonna be a daddy!
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422. On the next
Arrested Development.
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423. Barry gets a big break on his case.
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424. The fat girl in my
Skip Church's case? Not fat.
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425. The attorney bought her a fat suit.
Oh! I've got another case.
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426. Maggie is suing you
for paternity.
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427. And for the first time, Lucille prays.
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428. Take something else from us.
Do whatever you have to...
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429. to keep my boy
from going to war.
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430. And Buster is on his way...
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431. when he decides to pursue
a long-delayed rite of passage.
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432. Loose seal!
Watch out for loose seal!
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433. I don't care about Lucille!
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434. She lies!
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435. And then a seal bites offhis hand.
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436. Aaa-
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437. men.
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