1. Now the story of a wealthy family
who lost everything...Copy !req
2. and the one son
who had no choice...Copy !req
3. but to keep them all together.Copy !req
4. It's Arrested Development.Copy !req
5. It was Sunday morning,
and Michael was making cornballs.Copy !req
6. A Bluth family favorite since
George Sr. unsuccessfully...Copy !req
7. tried to market the device
in the mid-'70s.Copy !req
8. Time to pull out the basket
and we dig into some hot...Copy !req
9. - Son of a bitch!
- Oh, look what you did!Copy !req
10. - You plopped it!
- I'll plop you!Copy !req
11. - It was a ritual Michael shared with his son...Copy !req
12. before their weekly
bike ride to Balboa Island.Copy !req
13. Be careful! Don't touch that.
Never touch that.Copy !req
14. I'm looking forward to our ride today.
We better go extra hard
to work off these cornballs.Copy !req
15. Or, you could not eat the cornballs
and let your kid lead his own life.Copy !req
16. Please. He loves this. Am I right?Copy !req
17. Actually, uh, I can't really go today.Copy !req
18. - How's that?
- My bike needs a tune-up or something.Copy !req
19. Let's not blame the bike, okay?Copy !req
20. It's the poor carpenter that blames
his shoddy tools for the... Ow!Copy !req
21. { Beeps] Christ!Copy !req
22. - That stupid cornballing piece of... { Beeps]
- You okay?Copy !req
23. - So I'm gonna go, okay?
- Yeah, yeah. It's fine.Copy !req
24. It's good.
That's okay. Have fun.Copy !req
25. - Getting too old for his daddy?
- No. He'll be fine.Copy !req
26. And I would buy him a faster bike
if we weren't trying to save every...Copy !req
27. - Did you go shopping?
- Oh, yeah. Don't worry about it.Copy !req
28. - Excuse me.
- I paid for it myself.Copy !req
29. - With what?
- Company credit card.Copy !req
30. - You're returning that.
- But...Copy !req
31. - Get a job.
- Michael. Hey, the Cornballer.Copy !req
32. I thought these things
were only legal in Mexico.Copy !req
33. In fact, the Cornballer
wasn't legal anywhere.Copy !req
34. But George Sr. continued
to market it there successfully.Copy !req
35. - Muy delicioso.
- Es verdad.Copy !req
36. { Continues In Spanish]Copy !req
37. - Where'd you come from?
- I had another big fight with Marta.Copy !req
38. Gob had been having an
on-again, off-again relationship...Copy !req
39. with Marta, a Spanish-language
soap opera star.Copy !req
40. It looks like I'm going to be
staying here for a while.Copy !req
41. No, it doesn't. It doesn't look like that.
I've got a full house here, Gob.Copy !req
42. He's just in a bad mood, Gob,
because his son feels suffocated by him.Copy !req
43. - Suffocated? Really?
- Yes, Michael. He's a teenager.Copy !req
44. He's probably got a little girlfriend,
and, well, let's face it...Copy !req
45. - you are overbearing.
- Maybe I should be more like
you when it comes to parenting.Copy !req
46. No borders. No limits. "Go ahead,
touch the Cornballer. You know best."Copy !req
47. Michael, if I could stick my
pretty little nose in here for one second.Copy !req
48. When I was a psychiatrist...
and this is before I became an actor...Copy !req
49. - You're still not an actor.
- Lovely.Copy !req
50. I saw a lot of this type of behavior...Copy !req
51. and I think what you're experiencing is
your son's very normal need...Copy !req
52. to distance himself from
his overbearing father.Copy !req
53. Am I touching something?
Hot.! Hot, hot. Hot.Copy !req
54. - Be careful.
- Hot. { Gasping]Copy !req
55. - You all right?
- Hot.Copy !req
56. Now, take my daughter, for example.Copy !req
57. She lives her life...Copy !req
58. and I get the pleasure of
guessing what that might entail.Copy !req
59. Now watch this. Maeby, where are you
off to on this glorious Sunday afternoon?Copy !req
60. - She won't tell me.
- I'm going to audition for a play.Copy !req
61. Well, that time it didn't work.
What play?Copy !req
62. It's for high school.
You can't audition.Copy !req
63. I was totally wrong.Copy !req
64. She's reaching out to her actor daddy.
Does anyone have an ice pack?Copy !req
65. In truth, Maeby was reaching
out to a boy named Steve Holt...Copy !req
66. who was auditioning for
the lead in the school play.Copy !req
67. "I would kiss before I spoke."Copy !req
68. Maeby decided to audition as well...Copy !req
69. Iooking for a chance
to get closer to Steve.Copy !req
70. And then we actually
get to kiss, right?Copy !req
71. George Michael also chose to audition...Copy !req
72. Iooking for a chance
to get closer to his cousin Maeby.Copy !req
73. "I would kiss before I spoke."
Then there's a kiss, right?Copy !req
74. - Louder.
- And then there's a kiss, right?Copy !req
75. - Later, the cast list was posted.
- Steve Holt!Copy !req
76. - Steve Holt!
- Stand-in for Steve Holt?Copy !req
77. Steve Holt!Copy !req
78. Michael went to get his son
a new bike to keep him from slipping away...Copy !req
79. while Michael's mother was giving up hope
her son Buster would ever leave her side.Copy !req
80. Zip me up.Copy !req
81. Usually at this time of year...Copy !req
82. Buster would return to
his post-graduate studies.Copy !req
83. But without the resources to afford it...Copy !req
84. his summer vacation
was extending into the fall.Copy !req
85. Mom.! Mom.!Copy !req
86. - And Lucille was beginning to resent it.Copy !req
87. - { Ringing]
- What?Copy !req
88. - Hi, Mama, it's Linds.
- { Cries Out]Copy !req
89. It'll fly out on its own.
Why are you calling me? What do you need?Copy !req
90. { Scoffs] Very nice, Mom.
I don't need anything.Copy !req
91. My daughter needs
some new school clothes.Copy !req
92. - { Cries Out]
- Buster!Copy !req
93. - It's a bird.
- I know it's a bird. I'm on the phone.Copy !req
94. - It walked on my pillow.
- Look, I have a child that
costs me money too, you know.Copy !req
95. - Why can't you get a job?
- What is it with this family and working?Copy !req
96. Michael just gave me the exact
same lecture in front of everybody.Copy !req
97. - Everybody? Who's everybody?
- { Glass Breaking]Copy !req
98. - Who's everybody?
- You know, the kids, Gob, Tobias, everybody.Copy !req
99. - He didn't invite Buster.Copy !req
100. Buster's his brother too.
What's wrong with Buster?Copy !req
101. And even as she asked
the question, Lucille realized...Copy !req
102. that perhaps it was time to
let her own baby bird fly away.Copy !req
103. - Why do I have to take him?
- Because he's your brother.Copy !req
104. You run around with everyone else,
going on bike rides, making cornholes.Copy !req
105. - Mom, listen...
- Everyone's laughing, riding
and cornholing except Buster.Copy !req
106. And I know he's not the sharpest knife
in the drawer, but he's sensitive, Michael...Copy !req
107. and you could pretend
to be interested in him.Copy !req
108. { Exhales] Fine. He can hang out,
but he's going to work, okay?Copy !req
109. This is not going to be
a day at the beach.Copy !req
110. Th-That's cool. Mom packed me
a change of clothes.Copy !req
111. So Buster stayed and Michael
made him build the new bike.Copy !req
112. - It's in the big box in my office. Hey.
- Michael.Copy !req
113. Gob, what are you doing here,
and why are you in a bathrobe?Copy !req
114. What's he doing here?
Why is he in his bathing suit?Copy !req
115. Mom dropped me off
to spend time with Michael.Copy !req
116. Spend time with Michael,
or to serve her own menopausal needs?Copy !req
117. She's always got to wedge herself in
the middle of us, so she can control everything.Copy !req
118. Yeah.
Mom's awesome.Copy !req
119. Maybe we should call her.Copy !req
120. - So why are you in your robe?
- I camped out in the boardroom last night.Copy !req
121. What with you kicking me
out of your house... { Sniffs]Copy !req
122. there are few places left
that you have that I can stay.Copy !req
123. Hmm. Well, you can't stay here either.Copy !req
124. { Scoffs]
Let me ask you something.Copy !req
125. Is this a business decision, or is it personal?Copy !req
126. 'Cause if it's business,
I'll go away happily.Copy !req
127. But if it's personal, I'll go away.
But I won't be happy.Copy !req
128. It's personal.Copy !req
129. I am so sorry.Copy !req
130. Michael's son, meanwhile, was
waiting with his cousin for first rehearsal.Copy !req
131. - I'm surprised you tried out for this.
- Yeah. I just love the theater.Copy !req
132. That's great. I'm just doing it
to kiss Steve Holt.Copy !req
133. Well, actually, I think I'm gonna quit.
Yeah, theater's dead.Copy !req
134. But, he's always going to be at football
practice, so I'm gonna have to kiss the stand-in.Copy !req
135. But, no. No. I love the theater...Copy !req
136. and I gave my word, so I'm back in.Copy !req
137. Tobias, meanwhile,
stopped by the school.Copy !req
138. - I know why you're doing this.
- Dad. What are you doing here? Go away.Copy !req
139. Yes, because the director
might be here soon, right? Oops. Too late.Copy !req
140. He's already here.Copy !req
141. Hello, everyone,
and welcome to the theater.Copy !req
142. I am Dr. Tobias Fünke...Copy !req
143. and I will be your new director.Copy !req
144. - Oh, my God.
- { Chuckles]Copy !req
145. Tobias had gotten the directing
job by meeting with the school principal.Copy !req
146. And you tell me you've got
some P.E. teacher directing?Copy !req
147. That just makes me wanna
puke all over your head, sir.Copy !req
148. Give me a chance
to tell the Bard's tale...Copy !req
149. and I give you my word
on humble knee...Copy !req
150. whence you shall not say
it wasn't e'er to be.Copy !req
151. - Jerry, you cool with this?
- Sure. Let the little fruit do it.Copy !req
152. - Huzzah!
- As the days went by...Copy !req
153. Buster's apprenticeship was proving
more trying than Michael had anticipated.Copy !req
154. - We're excited. We want your business.Copy !req
155. - And, uh, everybody at the Bluth Company...
- { Yawns Loudly]Copy !req
156. Here I go again.Copy !req
157. And just when
he could take no more...Copy !req
158. - And we're back on track. And we're focused.Copy !req
159. And, Buster...Copy !req
160. you can't do that
in the snack room, pal?Copy !req
161. Mom told me to
stay away from microwaves.Copy !req
162. And besides, this is gonna be...Copy !req
163. the most bitchingly fast bike
in all of Orange County.Copy !req
164. - Really?
- Your son is gonna love it.Copy !req
165. Well, I guess 3:40 is as good a time
as any to call it a day.Copy !req
166. So Michael left for the high school
hoping to reconnect with his son...Copy !req
167. while Tobias's attempt to reconnect with
his daughter hit a snag.Copy !req
168. Stop! Stop it. It's all wrong.Copy !req
169. - But we were just about to do the kiss...
- Kiss. I know.Copy !req
170. It doesn't work. Look, you are
playing adults with fully...Copy !req
171. Pick that up, please.
With fully formed libidos...Copy !req
172. not two young men
playing grab-ass in the shower.Copy !req
173. - Would you hold the work, please? Oh, Michael.Copy !req
174. - Dad, wh...
- So, you're in a play, huh?Copy !req
175. I'm not.Copy !req
176. - I quit.
- Maeby.Copy !req
177. - Why didn't you tell me?
- It's not really important.Copy !req
178. - I'm just a stand-in.
- And you're ashamed?Copy !req
179. Well, this should
cheer you up. Hmm?Copy !req
180. I left work early. I thought maybe
we'd go for a ride today.Copy !req
181. - No, I can't go on a bike ride right now.
- Why, because of the play?Copy !req
182. - You're just a stand-in.
- No, no. It's not the play. It's just...Copy !req
183. You know, I can't go on a million bike rides
whenever you want me to.Copy !req
184. Wait a minute. Wait a minute.
Hey, is it about a girl?Copy !req
185. - No! It's not. Just drop it, Dad.
- You can tell me.Copy !req
186. What, is Lindsay right?
Am I really suffocating him?Copy !req
187. Well, they're different people every day,
teenagers. Hormones all ablaze.Copy !req
188. Except, of course,
when they're onstage when I need it.Copy !req
189. No, he said it wasn't about a girl.Copy !req
190. { Sighs]
Maybe he really is pulling away.Copy !req
191. Not a girl?Copy !req
192. Of course.Copy !req
193. Methinks a Cupid I shall play.Copy !req
194. Mm. Mmm. Mmm.Copy !req
195. Tobias came up with
a new plan for the play...Copy !req
196. - and a way to connect to George Michael.
- I know why you're in the play.Copy !req
197. - What?
- Watch this.Copy !req
198. Okay, everybody.
Well, we've lost a leading lady...Copy !req
199. but did you know in Shakespeare's day
that the women's roles...Copy !req
200. were played by men?Copy !req
201. Fancy that.Copy !req
202. Hmm.Copy !req
203. George Michael,
you know Steven's lines, yes?Copy !req
204. - Sort of.
- Fine. Then you are my Benedict.Copy !req
205. - And Steven Holt... Where is Steven Holt?
- Steve Holt!Copy !req
206. Yes. Get ready for the acting challenge
of your sweet young life, fair lady.Copy !req
207. For you are my Beatrice.Copy !req
208. Beatrice!Copy !req
209. Let's take it from "Peace,
I will stop thy mouth."Copy !req
210. Now we'll see if some sparks fly.Copy !req
211. As George Michael
contemplated kissing his rival...Copy !req
212. Michael sought his father's advice.Copy !req
213. - You think you never hurt me?
- What are you talking about?
When have I ever rebelled?Copy !req
214. - I never see you anymore, Michael.
- You're in prison.Copy !req
215. And I was here yesterday.Copy !req
216. Oh, yeah. That's-That's... I'm sorry.Copy !req
217. I couldn't break away from the poker game.
Capital "G" was down to his boxers.Copy !req
218. - Strip poker?
- Yeah, and it's tough.Copy !req
219. We can really
only play about two hands.Copy !req
220. Listen... { Exhales]Copy !req
221. Let him go. Let your son go.Copy !req
222. I can't do that, Dad. He needs me.Copy !req
223. Michael, you don't want to make
the same mistake your mom made with Buster.Copy !req
224. - Yeah, boy. What happened there?
- I really don't know.Copy !req
225. Maybe it was the 11 months
he spent in the womb.Copy !req
226. The doctor said there were claw marks
on the walls of her uterus, but...Copy !req
227. { Deep Breath]
he was our miracle baby, you know?Copy !req
228. And l-I was just too burned out
on raising you guys to care.Copy !req
229. So, he turned out a little, uh, soft.Copy !req
230. - { Loud Yawn]
- A little doughy.Copy !req
231. - I don't know. Maybe-Maybe it was my fault.
- { Continues Yawning]Copy !req
232. - Maybe I just ignored the guy.
- { Grunting]Copy !req
233. Wow. We're just blowing
through nap time, aren't we?Copy !req
234. Yeah, I gotta let my son go.Copy !req
235. Lindsay, meanwhile,
still had the dress...Copy !req
236. - and she was starting to get
some positive reactions to it.
- Look at you.Copy !req
237. I am.Copy !req
238. So she decided to hide it
in the attic crawl space.Copy !req
239. { Snoring]Copy !req
240. ? { Continues]Copy !req
241. { Slams Piano Cover]Copy !req
242. Are you crazy? I'm a magician.
I make my living with my hands.Copy !req
243. - And if I'm going to be staying here...
- Staying here?Copy !req
244. What, did that Mexican throw you out?Copy !req
245. She's not "that Mexican," Mom.
She's my Mexican.Copy !req
246. And she's Colombian or something.
Anyway, it's over.Copy !req
247. - You've got three days.
- Hey.Copy !req
248. If I can't find a horny immigrant by then,
I don't deserve to stay here.Copy !req
249. - { Both Laugh]
- Oh!Copy !req
250. Back at the model home,
Michael was adjusting to...Copy !req
251. the absence of his son,
by enjoying the company of his brother.Copy !req
252. - { Grunting]
- You know, I'm in pretty good shape.Copy !req
253. You could be eating my dust
all day, slowpoke.Copy !req
254. And Buster was starting
to give as good as he got.Copy !req
255. Yeah. And you might be eating... { Beeps]Copy !req
256. - Well, let's hope it doesn't come to that.Copy !req
257. Hey, Tobias. How's my son doing?Copy !req
258. Oh, well, he didn't want to
rehearse today...Copy !req
259. but I do think I have a handle
on what he's going through.Copy !req
260. I wish I could say the same for Steve Holt.
I don't know what the hell her problem is.Copy !req
261. - Her?
- Oh, uh, I'm sorry.Copy !req
262. I say that because I switched the parts,
but, it's still... { Sighs]Copy !req
263. off.Copy !req
264. Perhaps if she dressed as a woman.Copy !req
265. - She?
- Oh, for the love of God. She's playing a woman.Copy !req
266. Look who's back.Copy !req
267. - I'm exhausted.
- Neiman's again, huh?Copy !req
268. I've been going to the thrift store,
but I'm going to find a way to keep that dress.Copy !req
269. Things didn't work out with Mom.Copy !req
270. It was utterly macabre.Copy !req
271. Zip me up.Copy !req
272. - She always makes everything about her.
- { Groans]Copy !req
273. She's the last person I ever want to
need something from.Copy !req
274. Well, she likes to be needed, just as
long as it doesn't cost her anything.Copy !req
275. It's like she gets off
on being withholding.Copy !req
276. - Whoa. Buster.
- Look who's got something to say.Copy !req
277. { Giggles]Copy !req
278. I'm Mom, and I wanna shoot down everything
you say so I feel good about myself.Copy !req
279. - { Blows, Giggles]
- Look who's ragging on the old lady.Copy !req
280. - Hey, hey.
- Finally.Copy !req
281. 'Cause I'm an uptight... { Long Beep]Copy !req
282. Buster.!Copy !req
283. You old horny slut!Copy !req
284. Well, no one's gonna top that.Copy !req
285. And Tobias had found
the perfect wardrobe for his leading man.Copy !req
286. The red dress he discovered
in the attic crawl space.Copy !req
287. - Assuming Michael had found and returned it...
- { Line Ringing]Copy !req
288. - Lindsay called her mother, hoping to
get money for a new one.
- What?Copy !req
289. - Hi, Mama. It's Linds.
- Get a job.Copy !req
290. Look. Just hear me out. It's Maeby's dress.
It was stolen from her locker.Copy !req
291. They beat her up,
and, uh, took all her clothes.Copy !req
292. - Send her over. I'll take her shopping.
- Buster was right.Copy !req
293. You get off on being
withholding, don't you?Copy !req
294. - Buster said that?
- That's right.Copy !req
295. - My Buster?
- Not anymore, apparently.Copy !req
296. While Lucille
was missing her youngest son...Copy !req
297. - Michael was finally enjoying his company.
- Zip me up.Copy !req
298. And while Buster did build a faster bike...Copy !req
299. - Whoo!
- he neglected to build the brakes.Copy !req
300. - I'm flying!Copy !req
301. Buster?Copy !req
302. And George Michael had news for Maeby.Copy !req
303. So, I quit the play.
I don't really like plays.Copy !req
304. Also, I think your dad thinks I'm gay.Copy !req
305. - Oh. He thinks everyone's gay.
- Do you wanna get a soda?Copy !req
306. I can't. I'm actually back in the play.
We're in the middle of dress rehearsal now.Copy !req
307. - But I thought Steve had your part.
- Steve did have Maeby's part.Copy !req
308. And Tobias had given Maeby a new part.Copy !req
309. So you want me to play the man?Copy !req
310. Yes. Don't you see?
l-I cast the parts all wrong.Copy !req
311. It was Daddy's fault.Copy !req
312. And I still get to kiss Steve, right?Copy !req
313. It's gonna be a huge disaster.
I'll get you tickets.Copy !req
314. And Michael tried to salvage
what was left of the day...Copy !req
315. - with what was left of his brother.
- I'm a little shaky, but...Copy !req
316. - but we're here to work.
- Michael.Copy !req
317. - but we're here to work.
- Michael.Copy !req
318. - Mom.
- What are you doing here?Copy !req
319. Oh. Hello, Buster.
Here's a candy bar.Copy !req
320. - Oh...
- No. I'm withholding it.Copy !req
321. Look at me getting off.
How dare you turn Buster against me.Copy !req
322. - What are you talking about?
- I know what you've all been saying.Copy !req
323. But I'm not going to let you destroy
my relationship with my son...Copy !req
324. just because you don't have one
with yours right now.Copy !req
325. Wait a minute.
Me and my son are fine...Copy !req
326. and that is not what this is.Copy !req
327. Buster is a grown man.
He can make his own decisions.Copy !req
328. - Why don't you ask Buster what he wants.
- Michael. I wanna go with Mom.Copy !req
329. - You said that she shoots you down.
- I was trying to fit in.Copy !req
330. You were flying today, buddy.Copy !req
331. Yes, I was flying...Copy !req
332. but a little too close to the sun.Copy !req
333. You let him go in the sun?
Get in the backseat. I'll be right out.Copy !req
334. Front seat, Mom. I sit in
the front seat now. Mmm?Copy !req
335. Let me tell you something, Michael.
You have to fight for your family.Copy !req
336. If you were smart, you'd grab your son
before he slips any further away.Copy !req
337. Well, I disagree, Mom.Copy !req
338. I'm not gonna control George Michael.Copy !req
339. I'm gonna let him
decide for himself what's best.Copy !req
340. Mm-hmm. Well, you better hope...Copy !req
341. that little bird decides to
fly back into your house.Copy !req
342. Because they usually don't.Copy !req
343. { Man]
So, uh, can we go now?Copy !req
344. Yeah.Copy !req
345. And George Michael watched
as Maeby shared the kiss...Copy !req
346. that should've been his with
a boy he almost had to kiss.Copy !req
347. But, to Maeby's surprise,
she did not enjoy kissing Steve Holt.Copy !req
348. You smell like my mom.Copy !req
349. Michael returned to the model home
to find his son in the kitchen.Copy !req
350. - You're home.
- Yeah. I was waiting for you.Copy !req
351. - I thought we could make some of these.
- Sure.Copy !req
352. I'm sorry about what I said at the school.
It was out of line.Copy !req
353. I shouldn't have poked my nose into your life.Copy !req
354. - My life?
- I know that you're growing up.Copy !req
355. Yeah, but, Dad, you're, like,
the most important part of my life.Copy !req
356. That's a little cornball.Copy !req
357. - I don't mind.
- I don't mind either, buddy.Copy !req
358. - Watch your...
- Mother of God!Copy !req
359. Oh! Every damn time!Copy !req
360. Oh! This is a big one. Oh!Copy !req
361. On the next
Arrested Development.Copy !req
362. Tobias gets a review
of his Shakespeare play.Copy !req
363. I didn't get into this business to please
sophomore Tracy Schwarzman, so...Copy !req
364. onward and upward!Copy !req
365. On...Copy !req
366. Why, Tracy? Why?Copy !req
367. And Buster is back
where he belongs.Copy !req
368. - Mom.!
- { Lucille] What is it?Copy !req
369. I can't get down.Copy !req