1. Now the story of a wealthy family
who lost everything...
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2. and the one son
who had no choice...
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3. but to keep them all together.
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4. It's Arrested Development.
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5. Michael was preparing
for a meeting with the Bluth Company board...
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6. to decide what to do with
some recently unfrozen funds.
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7. Wow. Exciting, huh?
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8. - Finally getting some money.
- What do you want, Lindsay?
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9. - I'd like some of that money.
- Well, this money is for land.
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10. Okay? We're not gonna burn through it
like Dad did when he was in charge.
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11. With his bad investments,
and his corrupt dealings...
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12. - Mother's neck.
- No, that was a good investment.
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13. It is easier to look at now, isn't it?
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14. What if I told you that the money was
for something really worthwhile?
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15. - Like what?
- I want to have an affair.
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16. Now, I'm not sure with who yet,
but I'll need lingerie, waxings...
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17. These are some real costs, Michael.
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18. - I take it things aren't
getting better with Tobias.
- What's that supposed to mean?
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19. Things hadn't been getting
better with Michael's sister and her husband.
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20. Even after she came up with
a plan to get his attention.
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21. Oh, my God. Listen to the radio.
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22. I haven't heard this song
since we first started dating.
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23. I just feel like using my body.
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24. Well, Lindsay, could you use it over there?
I'm trying to grow.
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25. Yeah. It's clear that's not gonna happen.
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26. We had sex once in the last year,
and he just laid there.
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27. All right. Look, this money is for land.
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28. I'm not gonna give you money
to have an affair.
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29. Why don't you pick something else
to boost up your self-worth?
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30. How about, uh, charity?
Why don't you get back to your roots?
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31. Well, it has been a while.
All right!
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32. I'm gonna go do that right now.
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33. You're gonna go get your hair done,
aren't you?
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34. Well, if I'm gonna have an affair...
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35. Michael got a message
he intended to ignore.
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36. Until he read the next line.
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37. - A matter ofland, Mom?
- Oh, that's funny.
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38. I meant "a matter of'L' and 'D'..."
Life and death.
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39. What is the matter of life and death?
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40. Buster's jaw clicks when he eats.
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41. I think it's what's
driving his friends away.
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42. I sent him to Canada
for an operation.
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43. So I'll need some of that new money
that just came in.
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44. You know, Mom, if you want an operation
that's really gonna help him...
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45. you ought to have them
finally cut that cord.
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46. - He needs me.
- He doesn't need you.
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47. You coddle him. He's too old to go running
to his mommy with all his problems.
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48. I seem to remember a certain someone...
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49. running to Mommy when his
algebra teacher made an example of him.
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50. Michael had been suspended
when another boy cheated offhis test.
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51. Tracy won't marry me.
I won't get a job, and...
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52. What is this?
What's happening?
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53. Let Mama take care of it.
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54. I'll have a little chat
with Mr. Vandenbosch.
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55. The next day, Mr. Vandenbosch
was not in school.
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56. He was never heard from again.
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57. I know life is not fair to women. Your children
grow up, and they don't need you anymore.
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58. And I seem to remember
a certain grown man...
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59. who completely fell apart
two weeks ago...
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60. when I taped over the Nova special
that had the girl on it he liked.
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61. That was Buster. That's my point.
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62. George Michael, meanwhile,
was at the frozen banana stand...
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63. when he thought he spotted
a familiar face:
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64. Pop-Pop?
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65. Sorry, miss.
Pop-Pop!
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66. - You think you saw Pop-Pop?
- But with hair! Which is probably why...
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67. - he asked for my hair, remember?
- Give Pop-Pop your hair!
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68. - Give me the hair!
- It all adds up.
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69. He stole somebody's hair,
made a wig, knocked out the guard...
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70. tunnelled his way through a sewer line,
and then stopped to get a candy apple...
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71. - on his way to Mexico!
- Of course!
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72. - You're mocking me.
- Of course.
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73. Listen, I know what I saw, Maeby.
And there's no other explanation.
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74. So listen. My twin brother's in town.
I want you to take care ofhim.
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75. - You still see Uncle Oscar?
- Tell you what.
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76. Give him ten grand
from the, uh, new cash.
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77. - Just send him on his way.
- Dad, the money is for the business, okay?
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78. - I'm not just gonna hand it all out.
- Michael!
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79. This is my brother. Do you know
what it's like to have a sibling...
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80. who has no source
of income except for you?
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81. just one? No. No idea.
It sounds wonderful though.
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82. Look, the board is watching
every move I make.
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83. EspeciallyJordan. He's just waiting for me to
screw up, so he can blow the whistle on me.
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84. Why don't you just
buy him out of his stock?
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85. No, no.
He wants twice the value. But...
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86. Listen. Stop tellin' me what to do
with the money, please?
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87. I've got a plan for the board meeting that's
gonna take the gun right out ofJordan's hand.
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88. Listen, you've got the money now.
And you know my price.
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89. You don't need
a whistle-blower around here.
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90. Interesting choice of words,
Mr. Jordan.
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91. He's right.
We don't need a whistle-blower.
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92. We need a building full
of whistle-blowers.
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93. Okay? Whistles.
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94. I want this place to be honest. That's
exactly why I had these made up for us.
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95. When you see something wrong, I wa...
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96. There you go. I want you to report it.
I want you to...
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97. Exactly. Just like that.
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98. I want us to police ourselves as vigilant...
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99. Let's wait till something actually happens
though. Okay, good fun.
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100. All right.
Hey. Enough!
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101. 45, 46, 47...
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102. Okay, there's still
three whistles left out there.
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103. Who's got the whistles?
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104. - He kept one.
- There's a good example of whistle-blowing.
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105. But you've kept yours,
so it's hurting your case.
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106. I was in the bathroom when you asked for it back.
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107. - No, he wasn't.
- In any event...
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108. we are going to be
responsible with this money.
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109. Michael, I hope I'm not
interrupting anything...
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110. but I'd love to get a hunk
of that new company money.
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111. I just need to prove to my wife
that I can act like a man.
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112. And it's not about sex. I don't just
lie there, if that's what you're thinking.
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113. - That's not what I was thinking.
- Sorry, I just...
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114. - A quick question for Michael.
- Is this about the money?
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115. - No!
- What do you want?
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116. It's not about money in the sense that I'm
saying, "Here, Michael, take some money."
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117. It's just more of a "May I have some?"
kind of visit.
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118. Don't you have a wife
that you can ask now?
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119. - She left me.
- For Tobias?
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120. - She left me.
- For Tobias?
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121. - For me?
- No!
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122. - She doesn't even like you.
- I'm in love with your brother-in-law.
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123. You're in love with your own brother?
The one in the army?
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124. - No. Your sister's husband.
- Michael? Michael!
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125. - No, that's your sister's brother.
- I'm my sister's brother.
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126. - You're in love with me. Me!
- I'm in love with Tobias.
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127. - My brother-in-law?
- I know it can never be. So I'm leaving.
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128. - I'm enlisting in the army.
- To be with your brother.
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129. - No!
- Anyway, I can't be expected to live...
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130. on the $800-a-month army-wife
stipend that I'm gonna get.
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131. They just don't
support the spouses.
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132. You don't want to end up like Uncle Oscar,
okay? Living off handouts your whole life.
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133. Why don't you come up
with a way to make money?
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134. A suggestion of something to invest in,
or maybe, uh, maybe a business idea?
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135. Well, I've always wanted
to remake Annie Hall.
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136. Except I wouldn't want to get in bed with
a green producer like a Sofia Coppola though.
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137. Oh, but give me an old pro,
like a Robert Redford?
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138. Oh, I'd jump into bed
with him in a second.
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139. And I wouldn't just lie there,
Michael Bluth...
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140. - if that's what you're thinking.
- Actually, that time that was
what I was thinking.
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141. And later that day, Maeby
spotted something interesting.
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142. Lindsay, meanwhile, arrived at the salon
hoping to increase her self-esteem.
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143. Unfortunately, her stylist had just been
called up by his reserve unit.
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144. - What's happening? Where are you going?
- I'm not allowed to tell.
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145. - It's the war.
- Come on! These salon wars have got to stop!
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146. The war, Lindsay. The real war.
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147. Lindsay was stunned, not just
that she was losing her stylist...
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148. but that apparently,
there was a war going on.
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149. Well, I'm protesting this war.
You're my friend...
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150. and I'm not gonna let
Shauna cut my hair.
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151. I'm going to take a stand.
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152. And Lindsay found a solution
to her self-esteem problem.
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153. Gob and Tobias, meanwhile, were
brainstorming at a local coffee shop.
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154. - I need a cup of coffee to focus.
- It's so crowded in here.
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155. I can't think. Okay.
What is it that people need?
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156. People love to carbo-load.
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157. - The bagel place.
- There you go.
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158. - Hey, guys. What's goin' on?
- Just researching our investment.
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159. Oh, yeah. Coffee places.
I've thought about these.
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160. I'll tell you what. You guys come up
with a proposal, we'll try one.
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161. Gob and Tobias accidentally
had Michael on the hook...
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162. and they didn't want to blow the deal.
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163. I guess that's a response.
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164. - Hey, Nephew.
- Oh, hey!
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165. Uncle Oscar.
How are you doin'?
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166. Wow, you are like, like a rock.
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167. - Oh, the tension! Come on.
- Oh, okay. That's plenty.
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168. - Okay. That's the pancreas right there.
- What's happening now?
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169. The two men reconnected...
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170. - neither one anxious to
bring up the issue at hand.
- One on the lips.
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171. Obviously, Dad's in prison now. I'm running
the business a little bit differently.
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172. - You do the best with what you have.
- Yeah.
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173. - I have lemons, I make lemonade.
- That's a very positive attitude.
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174. I hate the lemonade business. I hate the grind.
You have to grind so many...
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175. - lemons.
- You're not a very metaphorical person,
are you?
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176. - I need money.
- I know.
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177. Ah, I cannot tell you how
that has weighed on me.
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178. Mm.
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179. Why don't we sit over here?
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180. So I've got too many people
watching me too closely.
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181. So, if you're willing to work,
or if you have something of value...
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182. The only thing I have
of value is my land.
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183. I could give you the rights to
"All You Need Are Smiles."
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184. That was a song I wrote for David Cassidy; he
was gonna sing it on The Mike Douglas Show.
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185. But he was too embarrassed
to do it in front ofJohn and Yoko.
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186. - Tell me about the land.
- It's a couple hundred acres...
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187. of lemon groves,
right near Camp Pendleton.
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188. If you're willing to part
with that land, Uncle Oscar...
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189. I can guarantee you a little bit more
than that $10,000.
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190. To be honest, I've often thought of
giving it up to pursue my... my lost love.
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191. The love that was taken from me.
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192. I hope that was the espresso machine.
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193. Michael made the trip
to survey the land.
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194. It was, indeed, beautiful.
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195. And the next day, he went
to his father to tell him.
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196. - You give that gift to my brother?
- Gift? No.
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197. I did not give him a gift. I told you.
The money was for investing...
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198. - and that's exactly what I did with it, Pop.
- Oh, Michael!
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199. This guy has got nothing in his life.
He wrote one song that...
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200. madeJoan Baez call him
"the shallowest man in the world."
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201. He has a worthless piece of property
and, yes, a head of hair...
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202. only because he's never
had to work for a living.
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203. - Wait. What piece of property's worthless?
- The grove. Where he lives.
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204. I mean, you can't build on it.
The government has an easement on it.
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205. - Does Oscar know this?
- Of course he knows it.
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206. I mean, they run their...
their tanks through there.
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207. Occasionally, they stop for
a little lemonade, but what's that?
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208. That's a buck fifty.
You can't make much from that.
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209. Indeed, the land was valueless.
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210. Fellas! Fellas!
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211. So. Tell me about
this investment you made.
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212. Back at the model home,
Lindsay had decided...
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213. not to take her stylist's
departure lying down.
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214. I'm protesting the war.
There's a war going on, you know?
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215. Yeah, I'm the one who told you, and
you said it happened ten years ago.
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216. Hey, isn't this the same sign you used
to picket the cable company...
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217. - when they dropped the Style Network?
- Actually, I used this one...
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218. for Michael when he was too cheap
to pay for the premium channels.
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219. But I added the bit
about the stylists.
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220. You know that secret you have?
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221. The one about the hair
that nobody's supposed to see?
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222. - Hai...
- I saw it.
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223. - Oh.
- I saw Pop-Pop.
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224. Oh, right.
Pop-Pop with hair.
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225. - You know, I should tell my dad about...
- No, you...
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226. He might need us to help him,
so we should go check out the prison...
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227. and make sure he's not there.
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228. Oh. Hey, you know, I got cable.
You won that one!
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229. Michael was embarrassed about
the bad investment he'd made...
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230. and was hoping
to keep it a secret.
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231. Hi, this is Oscar. I'm off,
pursuing my lady love.
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232. Leave a message.
I'll get back to you next summer.
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233. Hey, it's Michael. I know that you think
that you've disappeared...
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234. but I will find you.
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235. - Who's disappeared?
- No one.
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236. - Why do you ask? Have you seen someone?
- I've seen no one.
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237. - Then you haven't seen anyone
that looks like Pop-Pop.
- No. Why?
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238. Has someone... who looks
like Pop-Pop disappeared?
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239. No. Course not.
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240. Have you seen the agricultural report?
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241. Nothing's hotter than coffee,
so... the trend is up.
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242. So, if we could get
that check from you...
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243. I'm not just gonna
hand out a check, okay?
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244. You gotta come up
with an investment plan.
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245. - You gotta call...
- Oh, we've got an investment plan.
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246. - "Gobias Industries."
- Go bias.
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247. - Hmm?
- As in, "Go buy us some coffee."
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248. It's great. Looks good.
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249. So, when do I start
makin' my moneys?
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250. Well, um, there, uh... there may not be
as much investment capital as we thought.
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251. Uh, money's kind of
tied up in this land deal.
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252. This is the first any of us at Gobias
Industries have heard of a land deal.
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253. - We could borrow on that land.
- There's not much to borrow against.
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254. The deal seems to be bad.
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255. It's Uncle Oscar's land,
and it may be worthless.
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256. - And the board okayed it?
- They weren't notified.
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257. Damn it! Every time,
Dad does this to us.
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258. - Gob, Dad really wasn't...
- He went around you, around the board...
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259. - He steamrolled Gobias.
- Yeah, what are you gonna do?
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260. Go down to that prison
and give him a piece of my mind.
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261. - You don't need to do that.
- No, I'm doing it!
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262. No, because you're in charge now.
And I'm telling him that.
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263. No, no, no, no.
Listen, Gob, he's human.
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264. He's a human being, and... let-let me try
to get us out of this, you know?
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265. Let me just see if I can get Dad out of this
mess that he has created for himself, okay?
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266. I'm afraid... this offer
comes off the table...
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267. at midnight tonight.
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268. Maybe the worst bluff
I've ever seen.
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269. Even the members of Gobias
agreed on that one.
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270. The next day, Lindsay, having heard
about a military exercise...
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271. joined a protest group and went off to
exercise her own First Amendment rights.
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272. This way! Thank you!
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273. Right here. This way.
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274. I ask you to make sure you're fully inside
the free speech zone...
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275. - before beginning your protest.
- Free speech zone?
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276. This is where we're protesting?
This isn't right. Where are the cameras?
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277. They're in the free press zone, and if
you could save your comments until...
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278. you're completely loaded into the cage...
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279. Well, at least the procession will come
through here. They'll see us protest.
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280. Actually, they're using their right
to cut through the lemon grove.
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281. Okay, have fun, enjoy
your right to free speech.
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282. The armed forces
welcomes your dissent.
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283. Well, hopefully somebody
will come by we can protest.
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284. My grandkids. What a surprise.
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285. - Oh, he's here.
- Of course I'm here. Where else would I be?
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286. Well, we thought you broke out of prison
and were on the lam with stolen hair.
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287. Don't you think that if I got out of here,
I might want to go home?
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288. That's what we thought. But then my dad
told us about that lemon grove you bought...
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289. - and we thought you were going there.
- Yeah, but don't worry.
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290. We would never blow the whistle on family.
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291. What lemon grove?
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292. And so, Michael went back to the board...
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293. to take responsibility for his mistake.
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294. My dad screwed up. He bought something
that he shouldn't have.
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295. But I guess... guess that's why
he's behind bars.
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296. Yeah. And he's not allowed to conduct
any business from there.
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297. Right, yeah.
I was involved. It wasn't all his decision.
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298. You see, it was his idea, and then
I carried out the transaction.
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299. That's even worse.
Conspiracy to commit fraud.
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300. 'Course, you can always
buy me off the board.
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301. We don't have the money anymore.
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302. And I assure you that nothing
illegal has happened here.
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303. I've misspoke.
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304. My dad in no way is talking
about business from prison.
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305. Excuse me.
Your father's calling from prison.
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306. He wants to talk about the land deal
you made with his brother.
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307. I found this on your desk. Can I keep this?
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308. Back at the free speech zone, Lindsay's
protest had started to gain some attention.
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309. But not from any key decision makers.
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310. - Thought we were seein' a gay marriage.
- We can still hose 'em down.
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311. What do we want?
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312. What do we want?
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313. Where's everyone going?
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314. - What, are you giving up?
- Face it, Lindsay. They've won.
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315. Well, I'm not going anywhere!
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316. All your water's doing is
whetting my appetite for protest.
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317. No hair for oil!
No hair for oil!
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318. Fine! We'll drown you out with music.
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319. Crank it up! I'm in the mood to dance!
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320. And Lindsay discovered that
the activism that came out...
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321. ofher desire for prettier hair
really did boost her self-esteem.
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322. While Michael,
with nowhere else to turn...
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323. made a rare, unsolicited visit
to his mother's.
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324. - Michael?
- Yeah.
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325. I hope you're here to bring me
a check for Buster's surgery.
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326. They made him stop eating after midnight,
and he's hungry, and he's in a foreign land...
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327. and his jaw is clicking,
and he's scared.
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328. - I don't have the money. All right, Mom?
- Then why are you here?
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329. I don't know.
I don't know.
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330. So, how's work?
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331. It's-It's not great, Mom, since you asked.
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332. It's-It's just...
It's not that great, you know?
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333. I got a board member
who's trying to extort me...
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334. and a seller I can't find... this whole
real estate thing is a total mess...
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335. - I got Dad completely...
- What did your father do?
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336. - Did he try to screw something up
for you again?
- No, no.
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337. He didn't screw anything up.
I screwed something up, Mom.
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338. l-I did it, and Dad is just,
you know, furious at me.
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339. And he should be, you know? He told me
to pay off his brother, and I didn't.
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340. Instead, I bought his worthless land.
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341. - With the lemons and the tanks?
- I know it!
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342. First investment I made with the company
money, and it's a total disaster.
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343. Then I went ahead and lied about it,
which is gonna let this board member...
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344. bring the company down...
I'm gonna ruin this family...
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345. Mom...
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346. What's this? What's happening?
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347. - It's going to be all right.
- Why are you squeezing me with your body?
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348. It's a hug, Michael.
I'm hugging you.
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349. - Why?
- Because you need your mother right now.
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350. But I don't get along with my...
Sorry. That was a knee jerk.
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351. Michael. You made a mistake.
You're a human being.
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352. But you're so forgiving
to everyone else in this family.
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353. Try being forgiving to yourself.
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354. Now, if you'll excuse me.
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355. - Let Mama take care of it.
- No, no.
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356. Mom, come on. I don't want you to do
anything. Hey! This isn't algebra.
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357. I'm a big boy. Mother!
Do not make somebody dis...
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358. disappear.
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359. Now there's someone who could have
used a good mother. Whore!
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360. And so, before Oscar could
leave to find his lady love...
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361. - Oscar!
- She found him.
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362. Lucille!
You look fantastic!
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363. You still have the neck
of a 20-year-old.
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364. And you still have the hair of a lion.
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365. Take back the land.
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366. That's it?
But l-I thought we could have...
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367. this brief moment to... reconnect.
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368. Oscar. Your brother
is in jail right now.
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369. - My husband is in jail.
- You're right.
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370. So what's the rush?
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371. - And, the next day...
- Michael!
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372. Hey, Mom! Hi. Listen.
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373. I'm sorry about yesterday.
It was a moment of weakness.
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374. Now l-I gotta go into this board meeting.
I'm just gonna tell them the truth.
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375. If this guyJordan wants to try to get
me fired, then maybe I deserve it.
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376. He's gone.
We bought out his shares.
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377. - With what?
- With the money you tried to spend
on that lemon grove.
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378. You got it back. How?
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379. You know about what I was saying about
how people outlive their usefulness?
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380. - That was out of line.
- I know.
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381. But you made a good point.
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382. Maybe I do need something to occupy
my time, other than my children.
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383. Well, if you do want to spend it
together, it's fine with me.
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384. I'm so glad to hear that.
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385. All right.
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386. Let's get this meeting started.
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387. Why have we been spending
so much money on whistles?
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388. On the next
Arrested Development...
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389. Michael finds having his mother
on the board problematic.
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390. - We have to be courageous.
- I remember a young man who used to say...
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391. "But I don't have bad dreams in your bed!"
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392. That was Buster.
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393. - I want to be...
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394. a cage dancer.
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395. And Oscar comes a-courtin.
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396. What's that racket?
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397. Smile.
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