1. Now the story of a wealthy family
who lost everything...Copy !req
2. and the one son
who had no choice...Copy !req
3. but to keep them all together.Copy !req
4. It's Arrested Development.Copy !req
5. Michael Bluth was
talking to his son about his latest test.Copy !req
6. - A-minus, huh?
- Proud of me?Copy !req
7. Very proud...
minus.Copy !req
8. Better go hit the books again.
Get up there.Copy !req
9. C-minus.
"C" M-l-N-E-S.Copy !req
10. - Did you even study?
- No, I didn't.Copy !req
11. Wow. How impressive is that?Copy !req
12. The bar for the refrigerator
has been lowered, huh?Copy !req
13. Oh, grades are meaningless.Copy !req
14. Maeby's last school didn't
even have them.Copy !req
15. Back in Boston...Copy !req
16. Maeby's parents had enrolled her
in a progressive school...Copy !req
17. with its own system of evaluation.Copy !req
18. All I'm saying is that you might want
to push her a little bit.Copy !req
19. A kid without discipline
can get into some pretty tough stuff.Copy !req
20. You think she's gonna suddenly
turn to drugs 'cause she got a C-plus?Copy !req
21. Minus. And, yes, I think that, without
boundaries, a kid can get into trouble.Copy !req
22. Yeah, sometimes
that could mean drugs.Copy !req
23. I think stress
is what leads to trouble...Copy !req
24. the kind you put on George Michael,
even when he gets an "A."Copy !req
25. Minus. An "A" gets him ice cream.
He knows that.Copy !req
26. You're as bad as Dad
with his ridiculous lessons.Copy !req
27. George Sr. had used his considerable means...Copy !req
28. to stage intricate scenarios...Copy !req
29. to teach his children
what he considered valuable life lessons.Copy !req
30. - I need help.
- I'll get my gear.Copy !req
31. Typically, these scenarios would
involve a man named J. Walter Weatherman...Copy !req
32. a one-time employee
who lost his arm...Copy !req
33. in a Bluth Company construction accident.Copy !req
34. - Why are you hitting yourself?
Why are you hitting yourself?
- We're out of milk.Copy !req
35. I could have got it earlier if someone
would have left a note.Copy !req
36. Oh.Copy !req
37. Why? If someone
had left a note...Copy !req
38. this-this innocent man
would still have his arm.Copy !req
39. Why?Copy !req
40. And that's why
you always leave a note.Copy !req
41. Those lessons worked, didn't they?
We still leave notes to this day.Copy !req
42. Oh, that's what that was about.Copy !req
43. I thought he was trying
to get us off dairy.Copy !req
44. - I need a favor.
- What happened to, "Hello. I need a favor"?Copy !req
45. I owe Hot Cops 500 bucks.Copy !req
46. - "Hot Cops"?
- It's the stripping agency I used to work for.Copy !req
47. - Cop uniform.
- Right.Copy !req
48. I might have been
just a little too believable.Copy !req
49. Police! Open up!Copy !req
50. Anyway, they're claiming
that I never delivered on the gig.Copy !req
51. - I'm not an A.T.M.
- I keep forgetting how hilarious you are.Copy !req
52. - Shh, shh, shh! You're making it worse.
- Am I?Copy !req
53. I'm gonna give you the cash, but, in return,
I get to ask you for a favor sometime.Copy !req
54. My gut is telling me "No,"
but my gut is also very hungry.Copy !req
55. All right. I'll do it.Copy !req
56. Michael then left
for his mother's apartment...Copy !req
57. where she greeted him with
some not-so-surprising news.Copy !req
58. - I need a favor.
- We ought to put that on our family crest.Copy !req
59. - Oh, Michael...
- Spare me.Copy !req
60. The S.E.C. is making me
inventory everything I own.Copy !req
61. They want me to prove no new purchases
have been made with company money.Copy !req
62. - And there haven't been, right?
- Not after we doctor all these receipts.Copy !req
63. I can't help you, Mom.
I've got a job.Copy !req
64. I gotta make some money so you can
buy more things and destroy the evidence.Copy !req
65. You're right.
I'll ask Lindsay.Copy !req
66. - Hey, Buster.
- Hey, Brother.Copy !req
67. - You headed over to your girlfriend's?
- Yeah. She's down again.Copy !req
68. Buster's girlfriend, Lucille Austero,
suffers from chronic vertigo...Copy !req
69. which she has been trying to fight
without the use of medication.Copy !req
70. Her nausea's gotten really bad.
It's really been difficult on us.Copy !req
71. It's definitely taking its toll.Copy !req
72. You know you're free to go. It's not like
you made a commitment to this woman.Copy !req
73. Well, I didn't make
a "commitment."Copy !req
74. - I did refer to it as our nausea.
- Mm.Copy !req
75. But you know, that's when
we were goin' at it really hot and heavy.Copy !req
76. Well, now it's my nausea.Copy !req
77. Later, Lucille stopped by
the model home...Copy !req
78. Later, Lucille stopped by
the model home...Copy !req
79. to enlist her daughter's help
cataloging her valuables.Copy !req
80. - I can't.
- Why not?Copy !req
81. Because I'm... Don't want to.Copy !req
82. Maybe I don't feel like being criticized
around-the-clock.Copy !req
83. I don't criticize you.
And if you're worried about criticism...Copy !req
84. sometimes a diet
is the best defense.Copy !req
85. - Oh, hey, Gangy.
- Hi.Copy !req
86. - D-plus. Sign this.
- This is a D-minus.Copy !req
87. - Either way, it's above a "D," right?
- Another world-beater.Copy !req
88. And Lindsay realized she needed
to take a firmer hand with her daughter.Copy !req
89. - I'm not signing this.
- Fine. I will.Copy !req
90. Is "Lindsay"
with an "A" or an "E"?Copy !req
91. Okay, I know you got a "crocodile" in spelling,
but this has gone too far.Copy !req
92. I hate to say it,
but Michael might be right.Copy !req
93. You need to learn
a little discipline.Copy !req
94. Hmm. Nope, that doesn't feel right.Copy !req
95. No, no, no.
I'm telling you.Copy !req
96. You are now punished.
I punish thee.Copy !req
97. Are you serious?Copy !req
98. What could you possibly come up with
that would punish me?Copy !req
99. Oh, I have to come up
with another thing?Copy !req
100. Oh, Lindsay, before I go,
I just have one word for you.Copy !req
101. "Sleeves."Copy !req
102. You're going to spend the day
working for your grandmother.Copy !req
103. No. No, that's not the answer,
because you...Copy !req
104. What? No! You stupidjerk!
Why don't...Copy !req
105. Dumb. Dumb.
Dumb, George Michael.Copy !req
106. - Dumb, dumb.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.Copy !req
107. Calm down, you two.
It's just a math problem.Copy !req
108. If I fail math,
there goes my chance at a good job...Copy !req
109. and a happy life full of hard work,
like you always say.Copy !req
110. Maybe I'm pushing you too hard.Copy !req
111. You're all stressed-out.
Your eyes are all red.Copy !req
112. Why don't you take the night off.
just shut the book.Copy !req
113. Go ahead.
just close the book.Copy !req
114. Go ahead.Copy !req
115. Your finger is still in the book.Copy !req
116. George Michael.Copy !req
117. Buster, meanwhile,
was still worried about Lucille 2...Copy !req
118. whose condition
seemed to be worsening.Copy !req
119. You okay?
How's your nausea?Copy !req
120. "Our."Copy !req
121. I mean, our... our nausea.Copy !req
122. He remembered a study
he took part in...Copy !req
123. on medical marijuana
and its effects on nausea.Copy !req
124. The subject took the drug
in the form of a T.H.C. pill.Copy !req
125. Nausea was then induced
with a day at the carnival...Copy !req
126. which is what attracted Buster
to the experiment in the first place.Copy !req
127. Buster was found
two days later...Copy !req
128. trying to eat his way
through this enormous plaster donut.Copy !req
129. So Buster went to the toughest,
most streetwise kid he knew.Copy !req
130. - Tell your friends.
- Hey, Nephew. I was looking
for you at your home.Copy !req
131. - Dad told me to take the day off,
so I decided to come into work.
- Oh.Copy !req
132. I thought maybe you could
help me get some weed.Copy !req
133. It's not for me.
It's for Lucille 2, my girlfriend.Copy !req
134. She's your girlfriend?
Dad said you were her nurse.Copy !req
135. Look, she's sick.
This could help her.Copy !req
136. Pillform would actually be fantastic.Copy !req
137. I could put it on a tea biscuit,
tell her it's a marshmallow.Copy !req
138. I have no idea where to get something
like that. What makes you think I would?Copy !req
139. You work here.
This place is pot central, right?Copy !req
140. In the '70s,
the boardwalk was the place...Copy !req
141. to buy marijuana
in Newport Beach.Copy !req
142. The stand served
as a convenient meeting place...Copy !req
143. because of the banana's resemblance
to a yellow marijuana cigarette.Copy !req
144. - It had even inspired a song.
- ? Big yellowjoint
The big yellowjoint?Copy !req
145. ? I'll meet you down
at the big yellowjoint?Copy !req
146. I'm sorry. I can't help you.
Why don't you just ask Uncle Gob?Copy !req
147. Why are you hitting yourself?
Why are you hitting yourself?Copy !req
148. No. No.
He'd never do it.Copy !req
149. Besides, he always makes fun of me
for dating Lucille.Copy !req
150. - Everybody does.
- That's horrible.Copy !req
151. You could tell Gob for me,
but you can't tell him it's for me.Copy !req
152. - You can't tell anybody.
- I'm working.
- George Michael.Copy !req
153. What are you doing here?
I thought I told you to take the day off.Copy !req
154. - There's nothing to do. Maeby's at Gangy's.
- Find something to do.Copy !req
155. Go make mistakes,
get in trouble... be young.Copy !req
156. Yes! I totally agree.
Make a mistake.Copy !req
157. Here. Here's 20 bucks.
I want you to close up shop and go crazy.Copy !req
158. Go find yourself something
to buy that you don't need.Copy !req
159. Absolutely. Here.
Take 225 from me.Copy !req
160. ? Big yellowjoint
Big yellowjoint?Copy !req
161. ? I'll meet you down
at the big yellowjoint?Copy !req
162. Maeby was working
with her grandmother.Copy !req
163. And this is from when your Pop-Pop
yelled out, "Oh, Melanie..."Copy !req
164. when he was making love
to Gangy.Copy !req
165. This is so much fun. I can't believe my mom
thought being here would be a punishment.Copy !req
166. Oh, she thinks I'm too critical.
That's another fault of hers.Copy !req
167. Ah, yes.Copy !req
168. The week we had the au pair.Copy !req
169. You know, your mother
always wanted this brooch.Copy !req
170. - Really?
- Do you want it?Copy !req
171. I do now. That'll show her
for trying to punish me.Copy !req
172. Oh. Pretty.
It'll distract from the freckles.Copy !req
173. George Michael nervously
approached the family yacht...Copy !req
174. Gob had been staying on.Copy !req
175. - Uncle Gob?
- When he saw the yacht was empty...Copy !req
176. George Michael... as he'd been trained
to do since childhood... left a note.Copy !req
177. Back at the model home...Copy !req
178. Gob showed Michael the note
he'd found at the dock.Copy !req
179. - No. This can't be from my son.
- It is his handwriting.Copy !req
180. Plus he left me $200.Copy !req
181. $100.Copy !req
182. 100. I accidentally said 200.
I don't know...Copy !req
183. - This is impossible. Why would he do this?
- I know. I was shocked.Copy !req
184. Really, a hundred dollars. You can't
get good weed for a hundred bucks.Copy !req
185. Anyway, here you go.Copy !req
186. Now we are even on you
paying off that Hot Cops thing.Copy !req
187. - Might just be a few stems...
- Get that out of this house.
What's the matter with you?Copy !req
188. Maybe you should
save the lectures for your son...Copy !req
189. if he can remember them.Copy !req
190. I speak to Lindsay one time about her
hippie parenting, and I end up with a hippie.Copy !req
191. - It does seem pretty quick.
- For all I know, this has been goin' on forever.Copy !req
192. He's been stressed, his eyes have been red,
his grades are dropping.Copy !req
193. - Heard about the A-minus.
- I'm gonna go find out what's going on.Copy !req
194. - Hey, what you doin'?
- Nothing.Copy !req
195. No? So, listen, your, uh,
your Uncle Gob...Copy !req
196. seems to think that he saw you
down at the docks today.Copy !req
197. - Was that you?
- No, no.Copy !req
198. Maybe it was the other George Michael...
the singer-songwriter.Copy !req
199. - Yeah, that makes sense.
- Yeah.Copy !req
200. What'd you do
with the, um...Copy !req
201. with the money Buster and I gave you
to go have fun with?Copy !req
202. I put that
in my savings account.Copy !req
203. - Is that right?
- Yeah. Save up.Copy !req
204. - Okay. Thanks for being honest.
- Yeah.Copy !req
205. He's lying to me.
Can you believe that?Copy !req
206. Where the hell
is this family's morality?Copy !req
207. I don't know.Copy !req
208. - What...
- It's cold out here.Copy !req
209. What do I do now? If I confront him,
he's gonna lie to me again.Copy !req
210. - Should I yell at him?
- Didn't Dad teach us that
we don't yell in this family?Copy !req
211. Tell me before you hit the gas.Copy !req
212. I can't hear you!Copy !req
213. The kids are yelling.Copy !req
214. Tell me before you hit the gas.Copy !req
215. I guess you're saying,
"Hit the gas."Copy !req
216. Don't! Wait! No!Copy !req
217. That's why you don't yell.Copy !req
218. Yeah, yelling's
not a good way to go.Copy !req
219. I got a better idea.Copy !req
220. You wanna teach
George Michael a lesson?Copy !req
221. Yes, I do, and it's gotta stick. He's getting
into drugs, Dad, and he's lying to me.Copy !req
222. That doesn't sound
like the boy.Copy !req
223. It's my fault.
I've been pushing him too hard.Copy !req
224. - It's just... Dumb, dumb. Dumb, Michael.
- Hey, hey.Copy !req
225. - Dumb.
- Shh, shh, shh. I forgive you.Copy !req
226. I don't want your forgiveness. I want the guy
with the one arm and the fake blood.Copy !req
227. - J. Walter Weatherman...
how do I get ahold of him?
- He's, uh, dead.Copy !req
228. You killed him when you left the door open
with the air conditioner running.Copy !req
229. For God's sake. He's not dead.
I need to do this soon, tonight.Copy !req
230. Down by the docks... I'm gonna make it
like a drug deal went bad.Copy !req
231. Tonight? No. It's Yontif.
It's the first night of Yom Kippur.Copy !req
232. Dad, that's just... That's one night,
and it's back in September.Copy !req
233. That's okay.
You've only been a Jew about two days.Copy !req
234. - Just try to talk to him.
- Like you talked to me when I was growing up?Copy !req
235. - I thought you hated those lessons.
- I did, but they worked.Copy !req
236. - And they will work again.
- Well, I'm done with them,
because it was wrong, Michael.Copy !req
237. - Come on.
- Your son is a timid, thoughtful boy.Copy !req
238. He's a scholar, like his grandfather.Copy !req
239. What time is it?
Oh, almost sundown.Copy !req
240. I have to prepare for the Sabbath.Copy !req
241. - It's Tuesday.
- Shh, shh, shh.Copy !req
242. Lindsay went to see
how her own attempt at parental
discipline was coming along.Copy !req
243. So, having fun?Copy !req
244. - Where'd you get that brooch?
- Gangy. Nice, huh?Copy !req
245. That was supposed to be for me.
She was my au pair.Copy !req
246. I'm the one who cleared my throat
and pointed to the laundry room.Copy !req
247. Ma! You know I wanted that.Copy !req
248. I know, but it's an elephant...Copy !req
249. and I didn't want
to invite the comparison.Copy !req
250. Nice.Copy !req
251. In any event, your punishment is over.
Come on. Let's go.Copy !req
252. She's not going anywhere.
We're having fun.Copy !req
253. - Here, Maeby. Try this on.
- I see.Copy !req
254. Fine. I was gonna
take her out for ice cream...Copy !req
255. but if you'd rather stay here,
well, that's just fine with me.Copy !req
256. We could go get
some ice cream, Gangy.Copy !req
257. - That would be fun, right?
- I don't think so.Copy !req
258. That chubby little wrist
of yours...Copy !req
259. is testing the tensile strength
of this bracelet as it is.Copy !req
260. Maeby decided that perhaps
she'd had enough ofher grandmother.Copy !req
261. Maeby. Maeby?Copy !req
262. Hey, Gob. It's Michael. I figured out a way
for you to repay that favor.Copy !req
263. Dad wouldn't help me
teach George Michael the lesson...Copy !req
264. so I need your help
and your Hot Cop friends.Copy !req
265. - I wanna fake a drug bust.
- Michael, these guys are real dancers.Copy !req
266. They've never done
any hot policing.Copy !req
267. They don't even need to be hot. They just
need to show up in those uniforms.Copy !req
268. And so, Michael's plan
was put into motion.Copy !req
269. - Where have you been?
- What?Copy !req
270. I am like a caged animal.Copy !req
271. My old lady's on the floor, man.Copy !req
272. I am not s-ing around.Copy !req
273. Yeah. Gob just called.
He's got the stuff at the yacht.Copy !req
274. - Oh, great. Let's go.
- No. I think my dad's onto this.Copy !req
275. - I'm out. I'm not...
- Whoa, whoa, whoa. Come on.Copy !req
276. Gob will never give it to me.Copy !req
277. My woman is sick. Please?Copy !req
278. Later that night, Michael
made the final arrangements with Gob.Copy !req
279. All right, Gob, is this
gonna be believable?Copy !req
280. I want him scared.
I love this kid.Copy !req
281. These guys are pros.
They're gonna push the tension...Copy !req
282. to the last possible moment
before they strip.Copy !req
283. They're not going to strip,
are they?Copy !req
284. I told them not to, but I can't promise
that their instincts won't kick in.Copy !req
285. - Unbelievable.
- Trust me. It's gonna be totally real.Copy !req
286. This kind of thing goes on
all the time out here.Copy !req
287. Boats wait offshore,
lights are flashed.Copy !req
288. A guy comes over
and drops off a bag.Copy !req
289. It's gonna freak
the little bastard out.Copy !req
290. Michael went off to hide...Copy !req
291. while Buster and George Michael
arrived as planned.Copy !req
292. I really appreciate
you doing this for me.Copy !req
293. You're making a very
miserable person happy.Copy !req
294. She really feels awful, huh?Copy !req
295. Oh. Oh, I was talking
about me.Copy !req
296. But, yeah, she's a mess.
Be careful.Copy !req
297. - Uncle Gob?
- George Michael.Copy !req
298. - You weren't followed, were you?
- No, I don't think so.Copy !req
299. All right, kid.Copy !req
300. Let's deal some drugs.Copy !req
301. What are you doin'?Copy !req
302. Flashing the lights...
so the dealer knows what's goin' down.Copy !req
303. - Now we wait.
- How long?Copy !req
304. Who knows?
An hour.Copy !req
305. - Maybe five.
- Drug delivery!Copy !req
306. You wanted some marijuana?Copy !req
307. No, not me.
My nephew did.Copy !req
308. Show me the money.Copy !req
309. - Show us the pot.
- I got it right here.Copy !req
310. - Oh, my God.
- Nice, right?Copy !req
311. Okay, you can put your shirt down, Derek.
just give him the stuff.Copy !req
312. So. We have a deal.Copy !req
313. We have a deal.Copy !req
314. He's ruining his life!Copy !req
315. - Police officers! Freeze!
- What? Oh, no! It's the cops!Copy !req
316. - And a construction worker.
- Let's get this party started.Copy !req
317. - Aren't you guys gonna cuff him?
- You wanted handcuffs?Copy !req
318. All right. George Michael,
I hope you learned your lesson, pal.Copy !req
319. Okay.Copy !req
320. Okay, all right. Thank you. Thank you.Copy !req
321. - What is this?
- This is a lesson.Copy !req
322. Maybe I pushed you
into this, but...Copy !req
323. I love you too much to see you
ruin your life with that crap.Copy !req
324. - But it wasn't for me.
- Then who was it for?Copy !req
325. Who? Give me a name.Copy !req
326. - Okay, it was for me.
- Yeah.Copy !req
327. I was gonna smoke the marijuana
like a cigarette.Copy !req
328. Now you're looking at a nice big, fat punishment.Copy !req
329. I'm sorry. Excuse me.
I'm sorry. Ooh! Uh...Copy !req
330. - What are you doing here?
- The, uh... The boy was lookin' out for me.Copy !req
331. - What?
- It-It's for my girlfriend. She's sick.Copy !req
332. Why don't you just wait it out?
She's gonna be gone soon.Copy !req
333. - Oh, that's it.
- Hey!Copy !req
334. Why are you hitting yourself?
Why are you hitting yourself?Copy !req
335. - Why are you hitting yourself?
Why are you hitting yourself?
- Hey! Buster!Copy !req
336. What's the matter with you?
Easy.Copy !req
337. Is that true?
Why didn't you tell me this?Copy !req
338. You're always telling me
to do the right thing... put family first.Copy !req
339. You know, it is unbelievable
that you'd ask my son to score you pot.Copy !req
340. Why don't you drive him home,
and you and I will talk about this later.Copy !req
341. - Go ahead. Go with Buster.
- I'm sorry.Copy !req
342. - Hey, what are you guys doin'?
- We got your signal. You flashed the lights.Copy !req
343. We got the drugs.
You got the money?Copy !req
344. No, no. No, no, no, no.
We're all good.Copy !req
345. We just want the money,
You wanna make this ugly?Copy !req
346. We were just teaching the young fellow
a lesson. We don't want any trouble with you.Copy !req
347. - Thanks very much.
- Do you know who you're dealin' with?Copy !req
348. Drop the boxes! Put your hands in the air.Copy !req
349. - What is this?
- We had nothin' to do with this!Copy !req
350. - You set us up!
- No, no! These are just strippers!Copy !req
351. - Look how hot they are!
- Everybody take a breath!Copy !req
352. Oh, my God! My arm!Copy !req
353. Oh, my God!
This guy's arm...Copy !req
354. just came off
and landed on the dock.Copy !req
355. Michael realized
that his father had, once again...Copy !req
356. taught him an elaborate lesson.Copy !req
357. And that's why you don't
teach lessons to your son.Copy !req
358. How could you do that to me?Copy !req
359. I told you he's a good kid. You should try
talking to him when you think he's in trouble.Copy !req
360. Don't make the same mistake I did,
you know... teaching lessons.Copy !req
361. So you taught me a lesson
not to teach lessons?Copy !req
362. It was my last lesson.Copy !req
363. - Back home.
- Back from your wonderful time with Gangy?Copy !req
364. Well, actually, it wasn't so wonderful.
She can be kinda nasty.Copy !req
365. But I'll tell you somethin'.Copy !req
366. I'm glad you're my mom.Copy !req
367. Oh, um,
I got you something.Copy !req
368. - You're giving me this?
- You deserve it.Copy !req
369. I can't believe you had
to put up with her your whole life.Copy !req
370. Honey, this is so sweet.Copy !req
371. Let's celebrate and go shopping.Copy !req
372. - You knew the whole time, didn't you?
- Kind of.Copy !req
373. One of the Hot Cops
is my choir teacher.Copy !req
374. I'm sorry about all this.
It's just you were so stressed out...Copy !req
375. and I guess I got scared and...Copy !req
376. I should learn to talk with you
a little bit more, huh?Copy !req
377. - I think we're okay.
- We are, aren't we?Copy !req
378. You know there's nothing you can't
be totally honest with me about.Copy !req
379. You can say anything to me,
anything at all.Copy !req
380. Like, say, I had a crush
on my own cousin.Copy !req
381. Hey.Copy !req
382. - You just taught me a lesson.
- Oh.Copy !req
383. - ? Big yellowjoint
The big yellowjoint?
- All right. We're even.Copy !req
384. ? I'll meet you down
at the big yellowjoint?Copy !req