1. - Oh, please, get serious.
- I'm plenty serious!Copy !req
2. That was the very definition
of a sucker punch!Copy !req
3. Well? Even if it was,
which it wasn't,Copy !req
4. you would've deserved it!Copy !req
5. Wha... For what, saving your
dumb ass from giant lizards?Copy !req
6. - Giant lizards I wouldn't have had to deal with...
- You call that dealing with?Copy !req
7. If you had fixed
the goddamn fuel pump!Copy !req
8. Oh, okay!
So it's all my fault!Copy !req
9. Yes!Copy !req
10. Well, still a sucker punch.
Ow!Copy !req
11. Now, that's a sucker pun...Copy !req
12. - Oww! Son of a...
- Ow! Goddamn it!Copy !req
13. Hang on! Wait!
Stop it!Copy !req
14. - What?
- That!Copy !req
15. Goddamn it.Copy !req
16. What?Copy !req
17. And frankly, I really don't see
how this is any of your business.Copy !req
18. What're you...
I own the business!Copy !req
19. - I meant...
- And I own that business over there!Copy !req
20. - And I own zis business!
- You don't own the police station!Copy !req
21. - Yeah.
- Well, I...Copy !req
22. Shut up. And Mother, I think
we're losing sight of how amazingCopy !req
23. that landing would've been
if, ya know...Copy !req
24. - It worked?
- Right?Copy !req
25. And if ifs and buts
were candy and nuts,Copy !req
26. - we'd all have a merry Christmas.
- Aww.Copy !req
27. And maybe Santa would bring meCopy !req
28. a new sixty-thousand
dollar seaplane!Copy !req
29. Don't be so dramatic,
she's not a total loss,Copy !req
30. she just needs new wings.Copy !req
31. - And a fuel pump.
- Woman?Copy !req
32. Shipped out here from the States!
God knows when.Copy !req
33. It took three months to get
new tubes for the damn radio.Copy !req
34. And God knows
how much it'll cost!Copy !req
35. Well, and the airplane factory.Copy !req
36. - Presumably. Would know.
- You're paying for them.Copy !req
37. Well, but you own the business...Copy !req
38. Which I will liquidate
like a piña colada.Copy !req
39. You're paying for them!Copy !req
40. - But...
- And in the meantime...Copy !req
41. You'd better figure out
how to replace the moneyCopy !req
42. I won't be making on Archer Airways,Copy !req
43. - or you can just pack your suitcase!
- Hmph!Copy !req
44. It happens to be a duffel bag!Copy !req
45. - That's tellin' her.
- Eh.Copy !req
46. - Now, move zis aeroplane from la rue!
- From what?Copy !req
47. La rue! La rue!Copy !req
48. - What the hell's "larue?"
- I think it's like, a base for sauces?Copy !req
49. Ya know, like,
for gravy or whatever?Copy !req
50. sync & correction by f1nc0
- Addic7ed.com ~Copy !req
51. So I'm thinking new
wings for Lucy are gonna costCopy !req
52. - about five grand...
- Which we don't have...Copy !req
53. And which we
can't make without Lucy.Copy !req
54. We gotta fly to make money,Copy !req
55. but we gotta have
the money to fly, so...Copy !req
56. Yeah, that's a real Catch-22.Copy !req
57. Uh, I don't think that's a thing yet.Copy !req
58. So... Money.
Any ideas?Copy !req
59. - Mmmm-nope.
- C'mon, let's just spitball it.Copy !req
60. - Noop.
- Pam.Copy !req
61. - No.
- C'mon, there are no bad ideas.Copy !req
62. Oh, well, isn't that a change?Copy !req
63. - What is?
- All of a sudden it's anything goes!Copy !req
64. - What're you...?
- No bad ideas?Copy !req
65. Oh, Jesus Christ.
Are you talking about...Copy !req
66. - that was a terrible idea!
- No, it wasn't!Copy !req
67. We were the laughingstock of the Andes!Copy !req
68. - And we lost our asses!
- Okay, yeah, I mean,Copy !req
69. maybe it was a little ahead
of its time, but...Copy !req
70. - Oh, my God...
- it was local, it was sustainable...Copy !req
71. - It was rats!
- It wasn't rats!Copy !req
72. Dos por uno, dos por uno!Copy !req
73. Chinchilladas!Copy !req
74. El sabor sensación
que está barriendo la nación!Copy !req
75. Goddamn it.Copy !req
76. Plus, the fur farms practically
gave us the meat for free.Copy !req
77. It's probably free
at the glue factory,Copy !req
78. it doesn't mean people wanna eat it.Copy !req
79. Because it's
broken-down old horse meat!Copy !req
80. Chinchilla, on the other hand,Copy !req
81. is some of the finest fur you can buy!Copy !req
82. So is mink!
But people don't eat it!Copy !req
83. - I've eaten mink.
- I do not doubt that!Copy !req
84. - How was it?
- Minky.Copy !req
85. All right, Miss Priss...Copy !req
86. Let's go, let's see the goods.Copy !req
87. Oh, alright, but be nice...Copy !req
88. - I didn't have much to work with.
- Hm. You can say that again.Copy !req
89. Can't you pad it with something?Copy !req
90. - Pad what?
- Your brassiere.Copy !req
91. No, I meant my wardrobe!Copy !req
92. I packed for a honeymoon, not a...Copy !req
93. a descent into profound
and lasting shame!Copy !req
94. You're still gonna want to pad it.Copy !req
95. Why not?
You heard your mom,Copy !req
96. - there's obviously a demand.
- Because I don't think it's feasibleCopy !req
97. to build a radio tube factory here.Copy !req
98. Yeah, there's
probably zoning issues.Copy !req
99. - That's your number one concern?
- I haven't ranked them!Copy !req
100. Well, mine is rickets,
and scurvy, and scabies,Copy !req
101. and whatever other bullshit
diseases poor people get.Copy !req
102. Hmmm... I wonder if that
idol's worth anything.Copy !req
103. Wait, what?
W-What idol?Copy !req
104. I don't know. In the jungle,
the princess and the krautCopy !req
105. were talking about some kind of idol.Copy !req
106. - What kind of idol?
- Some kind, I dunno, they didn't...Copy !req
107. - Like a native idol?
- They...Copy !req
108. So that's why that little
German sneak is on the island!Copy !req
109. Are we talking jade?
Emerald? Ruby?Copy !req
110. - Gold?
- They didn't say!Copy !req
111. I bet it's a gold monkey!Copy !req
112. No! Not a gold monkey!Copy !req
113. - You don't know that!
- Yes, I do!Copy !req
114. - Not a gold monkey.
- But it could be gold, though.Copy !req
115. Yeah, I guess, as long
as it's not monkey-shaped.Copy !req
116. - What're we talking about?
- Why you're not a dog.Copy !req
117. - Shut up, dodos.
- Flightless.Copy !req
118. - So where is it?
- I don't know!Copy !req
119. - Where's what?
- The idol!Copy !req
120. - Oooh...
- But since they had us fly 'em aroundCopy !req
121. over the jungle...
Oh, for... I assume it's in the jungle.Copy !req
122. A golden idol,
somewhere in the jungle.Copy !req
123. I bet it's worth millions!Copy !req
124. I think you
must sharpen your pencil.Copy !req
125. - Excuse me?
- "Sharpen your pencil?"Copy !req
126. It is idiom?Copy !req
127. - This is a fairly common phrase, no?
- No.Copy !req
128. It means there's
a problem with your arithmetic.Copy !req
129. My government will pay one
hundred thousand ReichsmarksCopy !req
130. for the idol,
und not one pfennig more.Copy !req
131. Hmm. I wonder how much
Japan would pay...Copy !req
132. What does Japan have to do with this?Copy !req
133. Well, I'm sure they'd like to
lease an airfield on the island,Copy !req
134. if, say, they ever
declared war on America?Copy !req
135. Mein Gott.
Are you serious?Copy !req
136. The French have subjugated
my people for a hundred years.Copy !req
137. I would do literally
anything to be rid of them.Copy !req
138. Literally?
Or figuratively?Copy !req
139. - Why? What did you have in mind?
- Oh.Copy !req
140. Well, it is hard to say,
my mind is quite racing,Copy !req
141. - there are many thoughts in there.
- Pick one.Copy !req
142. Perhaps we could pay...
five hundred thousand?Copy !req
143. - Wait, what are you...?
- Shh. Pretending I'm on the phone.Copy !req
144. Hello, Japan?
Hi, yeah. So listen...Copy !req
145. All right!
One million Reichsmarks!Copy !req
146. Payable only once
we have secured the idol.Copy !req
147. And so far, we have no idea
where to even look for it.Copy !req
148. As for that, I found this,Copy !req
149. hidden among
my great-grandfather's papers...Copy !req
150. Fantastich!
So do we have a deal?Copy !req
151. If, when the time comes,Copy !req
152. Germany helps my people
overthrow the French.Copy !req
153. Ja, I think I can safely promiseCopy !req
154. that soon you won't have
to worry about France.Copy !req
155. Then yes, Herr Sebert,
we have a deal.Copy !req
156. Wunderbar.Copy !req
157. Now then, I believe there
was some mention of a pencil?Copy !req
158. Oh, ja, ich habe
eine großen Bleistift...Copy !req
159. I'll be the judge of that.Copy !req
160. Okay, Fuchs is renting
a bungalow on the edge of town,Copy !req
161. so I say we break in,
snoop around,Copy !req
162. and see what we can find out
about this gold non-monkey.Copy !req
163. - So rob him.
- Well, technically burgle, but...Copy !req
164. Shut up, but yeah.
For clues.Copy !req
165. - Ooh, like maybe there's a map.
- Yes! Like a treasure map!Copy !req
166. Yeah, right, with a big X on it,Copy !req
167. - treasure chest, skull-and-bones...
- Don't be shitty! And also,Copy !req
168. why would the map
have pirate shit all over it?Copy !req
169. Well, we are in the shipping lane.Copy !req
170. So, you weren't kidding around
about that pencil, huh?Copy !req
171. - That is not a topic for levity.
- Fair enough.Copy !req
172. It is interesting, I notice zat,
even in the throes of passion,Copy !req
173. you have no trace
of a Polynesian accent.Copy !req
174. Oh. That's because I was sent away
to boarding in the StatesCopy !req
175. when I was five,
all the way through college.Copy !req
176. Und yet you mention alliance with Japan.Copy !req
177. I would think your affinity
would lie with the United States.Copy !req
178. Right, because that
worked out so well for Hawaii.Copy !req
179. I always found it ironic thatCopy !req
180. if you really want to get bent over,
just ask a missionary.Copy !req
181. Fair enough.Copy !req
182. So why is the German government
so interested in the tupua?Copy !req
183. - The...?
- Tupua. The idol.Copy !req
184. - Oh. Well, umm...
- Oh, don't worry about them.Copy !req
185. In order join the royal guards,
when they're 12 years old,Copy !req
186. they have to agree to have
their tongues cut out, so...Copy !req
187. Gott im Himmel!Copy !req
188. - That was a joke.
- Oh, sorry, I...Copy !req
189. Wow, ethnocentric much?Copy !req
190. Tu'ua I matou.Copy !req
191. So. Tupua...
Germany's interest in.Copy !req
192. Ah, yes, well, the Führer, um...Copy !req
193. - The Charlie Chaplin guy.
- Nein!Copy !req
194. Nein.
We never, ever say this thing.Copy !req
195. - Really?
- Trust me. Anyway, the Führer is,Copy !req
196. um, a bit of an anthropology buff.Copy !req
197. And so Germany
will build a museum.Copy !req
198. - Fair enough...
- The most powerful museum in the world!Copy !req
199. For children.
Of all ages.Copy !req
200. Okay, so here's the plan...Copy !req
201. We need to keep Fuchs away from
his bungalow for a few hours,Copy !req
202. so after he finishes
eating dinner here...Copy !req
203. How do you know
he's gonna eat here?Copy !req
204. Where else is he gonna eat?
Luigi's?Copy !req
205. - I like Luigi's.
- Yeah, you're also teeming with mites.Copy !req
206. - Not teeming.
- So, shut up. After dinner,Copy !req
207. - we need to make sure he stays here...
- Mkay.Copy !req
208. Don't you wanna know how?Copy !req
209. - I'd like to know what, and why.
- What?Copy !req
210. What are you goofs doing here,Copy !req
211. and follow up,
why are you doing it here?Copy !req
212. For your information,
we're working on a planCopy !req
213. to earn enough money to pay you,
and to get new wings, so...Copy !req
214. It better not be chinchilladas!Copy !req
215. - Oh, my God...
- Heh. Oh, my God!Copy !req
216. - See?
- Chinchilladas! I'd forgotten all about that!Copy !req
217. - It's not chinchilladas!
- Jesus... Christ...Copy !req
218. Well, whatever it is,
do it somewhere else.Copy !req
219. - We can't.
- Why not?Copy !req
220. Hey...
Because we wanna hire her.Copy !req
221. Wait, what?Copy !req
222. Wait, eww!
Who is "we"?Copy !req
223. - Like, we-we, or...
- Yeah!Copy !req
224. No, not...
It's for after dinner.Copy !req
225. - Oh, right.
- That makes more sense.Copy !req
226. We want her to entertain
the kraut for an hour or so.Copy !req
227. That greasy little German guy?Copy !req
228. - No!
- Why are you talking?Copy !req
229. Alright, A,
what are you up to,Copy !req
230. and B, what's it
got to do with Fuchs?Copy !req
231. A, nothing,
and B, also nothing.Copy !req
232. - For one hour? A thousand francs.
- What?Copy !req
233. - Wait, is that a lot?
- Yes!Copy !req
234. - That depends...
- Yes!Copy !req
235. On if you think 35 bucks is a lot.Copy !req
236. - What?
- Right?Copy !req
237. Well, we have to see
what the market will bear...Copy !req
238. And if I only get 40%...Copy !req
239. Fourteen goddamn dollars?Copy !req
240. Well, minus your room and board,Copy !req
241. - so let's just call it an even... nine.
- Nine dollars?Copy !req
242. To have sexual intercourse.
With a total stranger.Copy !req
243. I don't know why you're so pissed,Copy !req
244. I was a stranger
and you banged me for free.Copy !req
245. Yeah, well, at least with him
I get two eyeballs.Copy !req
246. - Hey!
- One thousand, please. In advance.Copy !req
247. - Where is the trust?
- Where is the money?Copy !req
248. - Pam?
- What? Aww, man...Copy !req
249. I was saving that for a whole
big girlie treat day for myself.Copy !req
250. Go to the beauty parlor,
get a new dress...Copy !req
251. No one cares.Copy !req
252. - Teeming.
- One for dinner, please.Copy !req
253. Und tell the chef I wantCopy !req
254. the biggest steak in the house,
rare und bloody.Copy !req
255. I must replenish my Lebenskraft.Copy !req
256. Try not to fall in love.Copy !req
257. And you might as well start now,Copy !req
258. see if you can get
a free meal out of it.Copy !req
259. - You said my board's included!
- Just the continental breakfast, dear.Copy !req
260. - Wha...?
- Free bear claws!Copy !req
261. - Rrgh!
- Rrowwr!Copy !req
262. - Rrrrghh!
- Rrrowwrrr!Copy !req
263. Rowr.Copy !req
264. So, breadfruit...
What's that about?Copy !req
265. Oh, about one kilo, on average.Copy !req
266. Zat was a joke.Copy !req
267. Hey, are you gonna eat those potatoesCopy !req
268. - and stuff or whatever?
- Ja?Copy !req
269. Because I should probably
maybe eat something.Copy !req
270. - I'm getting kinda drunk.
- Ja.Copy !req
271. And sometimes when I'm drunk,
I can get a little... crazy.Copy !req
272. - Ja?
- Jaaa.Copy !req
273. So I at least need a haircut.
Care-cut.Copy !req
274. - Carrot!
- Oh.Copy !req
275. Don't worry liebchen...
I have eine große Karotte for you.Copy !req
276. Wow.
How are you still single?Copy !req
277. Okay, Crackers,
this is where you come in...Copy !req
278. - You see that bathroom window?
- Yep.Copy !req
279. I want you to fly in there, and
then meet us at the front door.Copy !req
280. Yep!Copy !req
281. - And keep it down!
- Yep, yep, yep!Copy !req
282. It's like if a...Copy !req
283. Wha?Copy !req
284. - I'm sorry!
- Goddamn it...Copy !req
285. - Sorry! Jesus.
- C'mon, let's go.Copy !req
286. - I swear to God...
- And you know they live to be like, eighty.Copy !req
287. - How old's he?
- What, 40?Copy !req
288. Ugh.Copy !req
289. Goddamn it, bird!Copy !req
290. Well, who puts that there?Copy !req
291. Are you in position?Copy !req
292. For what?Copy !req
293. - To open the door!
- What?Copy !req
294. - Open the goddamn door!
- How?Copy !req
295. - What do you mean, how?
- Yeah, what was your plan there?Copy !req
296. I don't know, jump on the handle!Copy !req
297. - It's a knob!
- Clearly a knob.Copy !req
298. Oh, my God.Copy !req
299. Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
Okay, let me think.Copy !req
300. What, what if we...Copy !req
301. Wh...?
Would you do that?Copy !req
302. Because we don't have all night!Copy !req
303. We also don't want Fuchs to know
somebody broke into his house!Copy !req
304. Oh, he's gonna know...Copy !req
305. Öffne deinen
mund, mein leibchen!Copy !req
306. Hier kommt
der Zug in den Bahnhof!Copy !req
307. Doot dooooot!Copy !req
308. And how is everything, Miss Vandertunt?Copy !req
309. Wonderful, wonderful.Copy !req
310. And would you
and your guest care to enjoyCopy !req
311. brandy and cigars
in your room upstairs?Copy !req
312. - Grrrr...
- Ja, we will enjoy zis very much.Copy !req
313. Doot doot.Copy !req
314. Because why are you so mad?Copy !req
315. Because why'd
you shit on the sofa?Copy !req
316. - I was scared!
- Of what?Copy !req
317. How mad you'd be
that I shit on the sofa!Copy !req
318. Bird, I swear... Ow!Copy !req
319. - What the...?
- What is it?Copy !req
320. It happens to be a large
brown suitcase, Pam.Copy !req
321. With some kinda spy radio inside.Copy !req
322. - Dun dun dunnnnnn!
- Bird?Copy !req
323. Knock it off, you licknuts.Copy !req
324. And come here, look at all this shit.Copy !req
325. - What the...?
- Right? And check this out...Copy !req
326. - What's it all mean?
- Beats me, but I'm thinkingCopy !req
327. - that kraut is into some weird shit.
- Redundant.Copy !req
328. Ja, mein liebchen,Copy !req
329. und wir tanzen...
und so schÃ♪n ist der Jazz...Copy !req
330. Und Gott verdammt
deisen Büstenhalter!Copy !req
331. - Wait, what?
- Und wir tanzen...Copy !req
332. And you guys, check this out!Copy !req
333. Holy shit!
That's the island!Copy !req
334. - Gooosebumps!
- Racist. All birds have bumps.Copy !req
335. And look, I
bet that's the idol!Copy !req
336. Okay, come on, let's go!Copy !req
337. What're you...?
No! We can't takeCopy !req
338. the map, he'll know he got robbed!Copy !req
339. - Ya think?
- Well, technically burgled, but...Copy !req
340. Bird! Pam, copy it!Copy !req
341. - The bird?
- The map! Goddamn it!Copy !req
342. You copy the map,
we'll clean up all the mess!Copy !req
343. - Man, where to start, right? Rrrk!
- Said the feather duster.Copy !req
344. Komm schon!
Du doof Schlampe!Copy !req
345. Wohl, das wird dich aufwecken!Copy !req
346. Son of a...
Knock knock!Copy !req
347. Nein, nein!Copy !req
348. - Well, what have we here?
- Nothing! What do you want?Copy !req
349. I brought you some more
brandy, but it looks likeCopy !req
350. your hostess has already
had a bit too much.Copy !req
351. - Maybe we should let her sleep.
- She's fine. Get out!Copy !req
352. Let's let her sleep.Copy !req
353. Gottverdammt, woman!Copy !req
354. - Are you deaf, or just stupid?
- Pick one.Copy !req
355. Manu, dear, could I borrow you?Copy !req
356. Would you be a little lambCopy !req
357. and show Miss Vandertunt's
guest to the door?Copy !req
358. Fine!
Und from now on,Copy !req
359. - I will eat die Scheißen-Pasta at Luigi's!
- Ugh, Luigi's.Copy !req
360. A-ta-ta-taaa...Copy !req
361. C'mon... c'mon...Copy !req
362. Upsy... daisy!Copy !req
363. Ugh.Copy !req
364. Do I get my nine dollars now?Copy !req
365. - No.
- Doot doot!Copy !req
366. I cannot wait to find
that verdammt idolCopy !req
367. and get off this Scheiße island!Copy !req
368. Und why am I speaking English?Copy !req
369. Pam, how's the
map, you almost done?Copy !req
370. Hang on...Copy !req
371. Yeah, okay, done!Copy !req
372. - What the shit?
- Oh, I know, it just keeps getting worse!Copy !req
373. I said blot!
Why didn't you blot?Copy !req
374. Why didn't I sew your asshole shutCopy !req
375. like a Christmas goddamn goose?Copy !req
376. - Huh?
- What?Copy !req
377. - Is that not how they do it?
- First of all,Copy !req
378. I'm pretty sure the asshole is gone,Copy !req
379. out of any bird, way before
you start cooking...Copy !req
380. Was ist los?Copy !req
381. Ach! Das
fenster ist zerbrochen...Copy !req
382. - Okay, we're going to Plan B!
- What, no, I hate Plan B!Copy !req
383. - Rrrk!
- We're doing. Plan B.Copy !req
384. And you better sell it, bird!Copy !req
385. Come on, out the back!Copy !req
386. Hallo?Copy !req
387. Aw, man...
Okay, here it goes...Copy !req
388. Oh, man...
Plan B is the best.Copy !req
389. Aaaaagh!
Fledermaus, fledermaus!Copy !req
390. Excuse me?
Come here, please.Copy !req
391. Si, signore?Copy !req
392. So, for context,
last night I was attackedCopy !req
393. by what I can only assume
was a giant jungle bat,Copy !req
394. which did this
to my face, and left meCopy !req
395. and my house covered
in blood and shit.Copy !req
396. Ah. Terribile...Copy !req
397. Ja ja, it was indeed terrible.Copy !req
398. But not compared to this breakfast!Copy !req
399. And probably not compared
to this goddamn map.Copy !req
400. - Aw, c'mon, I was in a hurry.
- To suck?Copy !req
401. I'll tell you what sucks...Copy !req
402. Ooh.
Being mistaken for a bat.Copy !req
403. Ooh.
But not as much as that map.Copy !req
404. sync & correction by f1nc0
- Addic7ed.com ~Copy !req