1. 10x02 - Happy BorthdayCopy !req
2. Well, this is another fine mess.Copy !req
3. Thanks to your idiot son.Copy !req
4. - You're as much to blame as he is.
- Wha... How?Copy !req
5. - Exactly.
- Wait, what?Copy !req
6. - You heard her!
- Don't yell at her!Copy !req
7. - Don't yell at her!
- Don't yell at him!Copy !req
8. - What are you doing?
- I don't know!Copy !req
9. Guys, come on!Copy !req
10. I think we could all
benefit from not yelling!Copy !req
11. The only thing
you'd benefit from is an EMP.Copy !req
12. Not even as a joke.Copy !req
13. Do I look like I'm joking?Copy !req
14. I mean, honestly, it's hard to tell
with you, what with that robot face.Copy !req
15. - Well, I'm not joking.
- I actually didn't think you were.Copy !req
16. Because, meatbag,
I don't think it's funnyCopy !req
17. when people steal from me.Copy !req
18. What...
Is that what this is about?Copy !req
19. What'd you think it was about?Copy !req
20. Again, hard to tell with you
because of your...Copy !req
21. Say "robot face" again,
shitlick.Copy !req
22. - ... delivery?
- Oh. You're gonna talk to me about delivery,Copy !req
23. - after you stole my cargo?
- I didn't steal it. I still have it.Copy !req
24. - You... Where is it?
- On the Seamus.Copy !req
25. I was bringing it to you.
Why do you think I'm here?Copy !req
26. Wha... Because I captured you?Copy !req
27. - Potato, pobobot.
- What?Copy !req
28. Look, let me go back to
the ship, I'll get the thing,Copy !req
29. bring it back here,
and everything's space-jake.Copy !req
30. - Wow.
- Yeah.Copy !req
31. You must think I'm pretty stupid.Copy !req
32. - Eh.
- How 'bout you tell me where it is?Copy !req
33. - In the safe.
- Let me finish.Copy !req
34. I send a couple of my guys
to go get it, and...Copy !req
35. - Well, send a couple you don't like,
- Let me...Copy !req
36. because if they punch in
the wrong combination,Copy !req
37. they're gonna be eatinga
20-kiloton burrito for lunch.Copy !req
38. - Huh?
- It's got a nuclear self-destruct.Copy !req
39. Okay, so then how 'bout you
tell me the right combination?Copy !req
40. Well, because I feel like if I did,Copy !req
41. I'd no longer be negotiating
from a position of power.Copy !req
42. - You think you're in a position of power?
- Eh...Copy !req
43. M'kay. Well, I'm gonna
go do this thing with...Copy !req
44. - well, to your friends.
- Tell 'em hey.Copy !req
45. And I'm while I'm gone,Copy !req
46. I'd really like you to give some
thought to telling me the combination.Copy !req
47. I feel like I have thought about it.Copy !req
48. Well, but you haven't met my buddy...Copy !req
49. Funbeak.Copy !req
50. - Jesus Hannibal Christ.
- Right?Copy !req
51. Say hello, Funbeak.Copy !req
52. Hello, Fun-un-unbeak.Copy !req
53. You kook.Copy !req
54. sync & correction by f1nc0
- Addic7ed.com ~Copy !req
55. Okay, I'm looking around
and I'm seeingCopy !req
56. some pretty mopey faces.Copy !req
57. Yeah, 'cause you're selling us
into slavery down in the spek mines.Copy !req
58. - Wait, what?
- Well, not all of you.Copy !req
59. - Come again?
- Space phrasing.Copy !req
60. Well, thanks to your buddy Bort,
one of you has a chance to go free.Copy !req
61. And, hell, I'll even throw in your ship.Copy !req
62. - Come on.
- That is our ship.Copy !req
63. First of all, that's my ship.Copy !req
64. - Half yours.
- Shut up. And...Copy !req
65. And who knows?
Maybe you'll win it back.Copy !req
66. - Win it back how?
- Oh, man. I was hoping you'd ask that,Copy !req
67. because this sets up my big reveal.Copy !req
68. - Ah! - Jesus Space Christ.
- Uh... okay.Copy !req
69. Holy shit!
It's that dickhead Bort.Copy !req
70. Hey. Hey, guys.Copy !req
71. Whoever doesn't die,
let's hang out after.Copy !req
72. Pretty sweet reveal, huh?Copy !req
73. - Gladiator fights? Are you serious?
- Maybe it is my delivery.Copy !req
74. Yeah, Bort rented y'all
for his birthday party.Copy !req
75. - Rented?
- Unless you die.Copy !req
76. - Well, then he's buying you.
- Wait, have we done this before?Copy !req
77. - Somebody has.
- Right?Copy !req
78. Doesn't matter. Okay, so while I go
check in on Archer's torture sesh,Copy !req
79. y'all decide who's gonna fight who.Copy !req
80. - Actually, it's "whom."
- I said "whom."Copy !req
81. Or not. I don't know.
Bee-boo-boop.Copy !req
82. Hey, what do you guys
think about my delivery?Copy !req
83. Well, now what
are we supposed to do?Copy !req
84. I guess we got to pick
somebody to fight against.Copy !req
85. - Aw, man, I can't fight you guys.
- I literally can't.Copy !req
86. According to
the First Law of Robotics,Copy !req
87. I'm not allowed
to harm a human being.Copy !req
88. - I pick Krieger.
- Wha... No way!Copy !req
89. - Yes way.
- Cyril.Copy !req
90. Shut your fat mouth!
I get Krieger!Copy !req
91. - Excuse me?
- I...Copy !req
92. No, I mean, come on.
I called dibs.Copy !req
93. - Well then, I get Ms. Archer.
- Aw, man.Copy !req
94. Well, as much as I'd like
to see you idiotsCopy !req
95. stomp each other's heads in...Copy !req
96. - Perhaps another time.
- Ho-ho.Copy !req
97. Where the hell do you
think you're going?Copy !req
98. To rescue Sterling
and get off this rock.Copy !req
99. - Plus, there has to be a bar around here.
- Oh, no you don't!Copy !req
100. - Whoop!
- Ow!Copy !req
101. Toodles.Copy !req
102. - Okay, I pick you.
- Bring it.Copy !req
103. Oh, I will.
I'm bringing extra.Copy !req
104. So, Cheryl and Lana,
Cyril and me,Copy !req
105. and where does that leave Pam?Copy !req
106. As the loneliest gal
at the Monsters' Ball.Copy !req
107. Ooh!Copy !req
108. Krieger, want to swap with me?Copy !req
109. - Yep, yep, yep.
- Wait, what?Copy !req
110. Oh, man, this is gonna be so gross.Copy !req
111. - What is?
- Cleaning your nuts outCopy !req
112. - from between my toes.
- Ew.Copy !req
113. Yeah. You better gulp nervously.Copy !req
114. - Lana, do something.
- Okay, okay.Copy !req
115. Me and Carol,Copy !req
116. - Cyril and Krieger...
- Yes.Copy !req
117. Then those two winners fight,
and then I guessCopy !req
118. Pam gets that winner.Copy !req
119. Aw.
We're all winners in my book.Copy !req
120. And I guess just try
to make your fights look real,Copy !req
121. and maybe that'll
buy us some timeCopy !req
122. to come up with a plan to
get out of this crazy place.Copy !req
123. That's Sterling.Copy !req
124. Come on, already!
What are you, hourly?Copy !req
125. I am, actually.Copy !req
126. Please don't do tha...Copy !req
127. Please...
I can't take any more.Copy !req
128. But Funbeak
has so much more to give.Copy !req
129. That was a joke.Copy !req
130. Ha ha ha ha ha.Copy !req
131. Listen, listen... listen to me.Copy !req
132. You guys seriously
have to work on your delivery.Copy !req
133. Funbeak will try again.
Did you hear the oneCopy !req
134. about the human with no penis?Copy !req
135. No.Copy !req
136. Wait. Hang on.
Funbeak messed it up.Copy !req
137. Uh... hang on.
Uh... o-okay.Copy !req
138. So...Copy !req
139. - Duh.
- Hey.Copy !req
140. - Mother?
- Sterling. Are you all right?Copy !req
141. I'm not great.Copy !req
142. Who are you
and what are you doing?Copy !req
143. Well, I was drinking
a surprisingly good martini,Copy !req
144. but now it seems
I'll have to settle forCopy !req
145. whipping the ass off
of some robot cereal mascot.Copy !req
146. Funbeak will...Copy !req
147. destroy you.Copy !req
148. Bring it, bird.Copy !req
149. Holy shit.
This is literally a dream come true.Copy !req
150. Which, unfortunately,
turns super sexual.Copy !req
151. Will you quit screwing around?Copy !req
152. Oh, you're just jealous.Copy !req
153. That you zapped yourself
into the CPUCopy !req
154. - of the world's ugliest bird?
- You're crazy. I'm gorgeous.Copy !req
155. Will you...Copy !req
156. - How we doing, gang?
- Oh, um, uh...Copy !req
157. Subject is still uncooperative.Copy !req
158. Well, are you zapping
his dick like I told you?Copy !req
159. - Yes.
- All right.Copy !req
160. - Let me see.
- As you wish.Copy !req
161. Whoa, whoa, wait,
no, no, no, no, no, no...Copy !req
162. Yeah.Copy !req
163. How 'bout it, bud?Copy !req
164. Ready to tell me
the combination to the safe?Copy !req
165. No.Copy !req
166. All right. Well, I'm gonna goCopy !req
167. watch his nutwipe buddies
try to kill each other, so...Copy !req
168. - Wait, wait, wait. What?
- Yeah, gladiator fights.Copy !req
169. Okay, Funbeak, keep it up
with the ol' weenie roast here.Copy !req
170. Weenie roast...
that is a good one. LOL.Copy !req
171. It was good.
And my delivery's fine.Copy !req
172. Okay, now cut me out of here.Copy !req
173. First tell me what's in the safe.Copy !req
174. In the what? Nothing.
What are you...Copy !req
175. - I was just trying to buy some time.
- Uh-huh.Copy !req
176. Now let's go find the shuttle
and get the hell out of this dump.Copy !req
177. Whoa, wait,
what about the others?Copy !req
178. Oh... they'll be fine.Copy !req
179. Aah!Copy !req
180. Cyril, no, no, no, no, no!Copy !req
181. Holy shit.Copy !req
182. Ooh. More like Isaac
Assholimov, am I right?Copy !req
183. I'm right.Copy !req
184. Oh, man. He's cut in half
and still talking smack.Copy !req
185. Give it up for him.Copy !req
186. Hey, shut up.Copy !req
187. Whose birthday is it?Copy !req
188. Bort's, exactly.Copy !req
189. Okay, put your hands,
tentacles, or cloacas togetherCopy !req
190. for our next contestants,
a couple of furious females,Copy !req
191. Carol and Lana!Copy !req
192. - What'd I miss?
- Oh, man.Copy !req
193. That one dude
cut that other dude...Copy !req
194. - look at me... literally in half.
- Sweet.Copy !req
195. - Good luck out there.
- Yeah! She's gonna need it!Copy !req
196. - Wait, what?
- Come on, man.Copy !req
197. You're spilling all my robot milk.Copy !req
198. Mother, there's
way too many guards.Copy !req
199. - We need to go get the others.
- What we need is a distraction.Copy !req
200. - You could do your bird dance.
- You're one to talk.Copy !req
201. - How?
- Exactly.Copy !req
202. Wait a minute,
this thing's got a radio.Copy !req
203. - What if we called Ray?
- Yeah, what if.Copy !req
204. Well, couldn't he...
do something?Copy !req
205. I don't know. I mean, maybe, if
we could get him on the radio...Copy !req
206. - ... and if he wasn't Ray.
- Probably eating all the cake.Copy !req
207. So, come on,
let's go get the others.Copy !req
208. But if you leave Lana here, you'll
have the ship back all to yourself.Copy !req
209. Well, you'd still be there.Copy !req
210. - Wh...
- And Ray.Copy !req
211. Uh. Such a fatty.Copy !req
212. And I don't want
the ship bad enoughCopy !req
213. for Lana to actually,
you know, die.Copy !req
214. - Who says she's gonna die?
- You are gonna die!Copy !req
215. Wait, wait, what's going on?Copy !req
216. Gladiators, on your marks...Copy !req
217. - Wait, wait, hang on.
- Get set.Copy !req
218. Whoa...Copy !req
219. - Whoa!
- Bitch!Copy !req
220. Oh, for the...
Can you believe this?Copy !req
221. Right?
I'm not gonna lie,Copy !req
222. I've got my species'
equivalent of a boner.Copy !req
223. - Ugh.
- Ew.Copy !req
224. Shut up.
You can't smell it.Copy !req
225. Yes, we can.Copy !req
226. Hi-yah!Copy !req
227. - Berserker!
- No!Copy !req
228. No, what are you... No, no!
No, no, no!Copy !req
229. I did not see that coming,
ladies and gentlemen.Copy !req
230. I guess it's just anything go...
Oh, my God!Copy !req
231. Oh, so you want to play for keeps?Copy !req
232. Oh, man, a full-on battle royale.Copy !req
233. - This may be the best birthday party ever.
- Bitch!Copy !req
234. Or, actually,
maybe the third or fourthCopy !req
235. best birthday party ever.Copy !req
236. I've never had a birthday party.Copy !req
237. - Well, and who would come?
- Wha... What are you guys doing here?Copy !req
238. I thought you died or ditched us.Copy !req
239. - Oh, now, uh, nobody died.
- Not yet.Copy !req
240. Holy space shit.Copy !req
241. Someone's gonna
get hurt out there.Copy !req
242. - You think?
- He said "someone," not "something."Copy !req
243. - Ugh. You know...
- Krieger, shut up.Copy !req
244. How are we gonna
get those dickheadsCopy !req
245. to stop fighting long enough
for all of us to escape?Copy !req
246. Hmm.Copy !req
247. Ooh.Copy !req
248. - Same height, similar build.
- Oh come on, no, that's just...Copy !req
249. Just crazy enough to work.Copy !req
250. Ugh. And speaking of crazy,
what is that smell?Copy !req
251. Oh, damn it.
Did Pam have a boner in here?Copy !req
252. Wha... You can smell them?Copy !req
253. You-you can't?Copy !req
254. This wasn't the plan, you idiot!Copy !req
255. - Well, I wasn't paying attention!
- Oh, yeah?Copy !req
256. - No, no, no, no, no, no, no...
- Well, how do you like these apples?Copy !req
257. I do not like those apples.Copy !req
258. Thanks, Barry Six.
This is the best.Copy !req
259. I mean, I know we're not
friends or anything,Copy !req
260. and I actually... I don't really
have many friends, or any, really...Copy !req
261. Yeah, you realize if they kill
each other, you got to pay for 'em.Copy !req
262. Totally worth it.Copy !req
263. Plus, I got a ton of birthday money.
Thanks, Nana!Copy !req
264. - She used to be super hot.
- Nope.Copy !req
265. Psst, hey, dummy.Copy !req
266. Yeah, you-you ordered
a teabagging?Copy !req
267. What in God's name
is a teabagging?Copy !req
268. Oh... oh, come on.Copy !req
269. - Like you don't know?
- I'm sure I don't.Copy !req
270. But I'll bet
it's something disgusting.Copy !req
271. - Eh.
- Now, will you go wrangle those idiotsCopy !req
272. so we can get the hell
out of here?Copy !req
273. - Okay, go get Krieger ready to move.
- Or we could leave him.Copy !req
274. - Or you.
- All right. Jesus.Copy !req
275. So, hey, since he brought it up,Copy !req
276. do you have any thoughts
on teabagging?Copy !req
277. Uh, cool.
Uh, excuse me.Copy !req
278. Are you even serious right now?Copy !req
279. Seriously?Copy !req
280. Kooch, the undefeated champion,Copy !req
281. is taking on four opponents
at a time?Copy !req
282. - Did you do this?
- A five-man bunkhouse stampede?Copy !req
283. - How and why would I?
- Mm. Okay, folks,Copy !req
284. let's make some noise for...Copy !req
285. K-K-K-K-Kooch!Copy !req
286. Is he serious?Copy !req
287. 'Cause my toes only have room
for so much nut-butter.Copy !req
288. - Ew.
- Seriously.Copy !req
289. - So... temporary truce?
- Ugh. I guess.Copy !req
290. Okay, dickbag.
You ready to party?Copy !req
291. No, wait, wait, wait.
Guys, it's me...Copy !req
292. - Archer?
- What?Copy !req
293. - Hey, uh, what are they doing?
- Yeah, what are they doing?Copy !req
294. Don't stop. We got to
act like we're fightingCopy !req
295. - while I tell you my plan.
- Well, what's the plan?Copy !req
296. - We're gonna run for it.
- Excuse me?Copy !req
297. Well, first we get
Krieger and Mother,Copy !req
298. and then we're just gonna
haul ass to the gig,Copy !req
299. smashing and slashing
anyone who gets in our...Copy !req
300. Oh. Oh, okay.Copy !req
301. Yeah, I guess they're not
acting suspicious.Copy !req
302. And also: whaaat?Copy !req
303. - Ow!
- That's your plan?Copy !req
304. I'm sorry.
Did you have a... Ow!Copy !req
305. Damn it, will you quit
smashing me... Ow!Copy !req
306. Goddamn... Ow!Copy !req
307. Wow.
Fame is a fickle mistress, huh?Copy !req
308. Wait a minute, hang on.
He's right.Copy !req
309. - Huh?
- Wait, what?Copy !req
310. What other choice do we have?Copy !req
311. If we stay here,
we're as good as dead.Copy !req
312. Which, serve you right, by the way.Copy !req
313. So, how do we even do this?Copy !req
314. Yeah, see?
I mean, just like that,Copy !req
315. they're cheering
for the other guys, like...Copy !req
316. Wait a minute...Copy !req
317. No, no, no, no, no, that's Archer!
Move, Nana!Copy !req
318. Well, why do
I have to carry him?Copy !req
319. - Because look at you.
- Look at you.Copy !req
320. - Why are you a bird?
- Why are you a rockslide with tits?Copy !req
321. - Burn. Ow.
- Shut up.Copy !req
322. - Can we go?
- Damn it. It's my plan, I'm the group leader.Copy !req
323. Archeeer!Copy !req
324. And I say let's go!Copy !req
325. Aah! Move!Copy !req
326. Still my fourth-best birthday.Copy !req
327. Mm, third.Copy !req
328. Mother!Copy !req
329. Calm down.Copy !req
330. Let's go.
Let's go, come on.Copy !req
331. - Goddamn it, I'm the group leader!
- Yeah, way to lead, buddy.Copy !req
332. Archer!Copy !req
333. Eat dicks, Barry Six.Copy !req
334. Friggin' Bort.Copy !req
335. So, uh, listen, uh,Copy !req
336. I know things got
a little heated down there,Copy !req
337. and maybe we said and did some things
that we wish we could take back,Copy !req
338. but I hope we can put
all that behind us and...Copy !req
339. Sterling stole something
from Barry Six and it'sCopy !req
340. in the safe, so this whole
idiotic fiasco was his fault.Copy !req
341. - Archer!
- Busted, Archer!Copy !req
342. - Archer, come on.
- Well, Mother... touched my penis.Copy !req
343. Yeah. Since we're
playing the blame game.Copy !req
344. So just picture Mother's
big old nasty bird clawCopy !req
345. touching my cock.Copy !req
346. - What the...
- Uh-oh.Copy !req
347. - Oh, God, gross!
- Jesus Space Christ.Copy !req
348. - God damn it.
- Well...Copy !req
349. that's our Pam!Copy !req
350. - What the hell are you doing?
- Freeze frame.Copy !req
351. sync & correction by f1nc0
- Addic7ed.com ~Copy !req