1. Aah!
Copy !req
2. Back you go, number 47.
Copy !req
3. See you in three years.
Copy !req
4. Well, now that
my suit is hung,
Copy !req
5. it's time for me to show you
something else that's...
Copy !req
6. well, not-not hung
but super wide.
Copy !req
7. An 18-wheeler!
I made it at work.
Copy !req
8. And now sex time.
Copy !req
9. Slow down. I want
to finish the story
Copy !req
10. I was telling
you at dinner.
Copy !req
11. Oh, great.
Copy !req
12. Where'd I leave off? Oh, yeah.
Copy !req
13. So, I saw Sandra
at the market today.
Copy !req
14. She's still having a tough time
dealing with little Jason.
Copy !req
15. I guess he took a
blender to school and...
Copy !req
16. Welcome, Mr. Smith.
Copy !req
17. Back for another evening
of pantomime and shadow?
Copy !req
18. Stan?
Copy !req
19. Stan?
Copy !req
20. I'm here!
Okay, let's do this.
Copy !req
21. Stan!
What?
Copy !req
22. You want
to start individually
Copy !req
23. and then join forces
for the big finale?
Copy !req
24. No. I'm tired of you
pretending to listen to me
Copy !req
25. just so you can
pound this.
Copy !req
26. It's disrespectful.
Copy !req
27. What? I was listening.
Copy !req
28. Oh, really?
Copy !req
29. Then you won't mind
taking this pop quiz
Copy !req
30. about everything
I said today.
Copy !req
31. The gender of Denise's
new baby?
Copy !req
32. The ethnicity
of your friend Tuvok?
Copy !req
33. Your maiden name?
These questions are impossible!
Copy !req
34. Impossible to answer
right now, because...
Copy !req
35. My stomach!
It hurts so bad!
Copy !req
36. Oh, brother.
Copy !req
37. How dare you!
It could be my appendix!
Copy !req
38. Oh. Well, then you'll need
an ambulance, won't you?
Copy !req
39. I'm beat.
Copy !req
40. You know, you tell yourself
you're gonna get this job
Copy !req
41. at Hearty's and it's gonna
be this great thing, but...
Copy !req
42. it's not.
Copy !req
43. So why don't you quit?
Copy !req
44. I'd love to, but I only
have $1,200 saved.
Copy !req
45. H-Hold up. $1,200?
Copy !req
46. Klaus, you can quit your job!
Copy !req
47. We'll use that money to start a
business and be our own bosses!
Copy !req
48. I don't know.
Copy !req
49. What's the business?
Copy !req
50. Roger and Klaus's Business.
Copy !req
51. I love it!
Copy !req
52. Right? I'm thinking we offer
a service or a product
Copy !req
53. that customers will pay for.
Copy !req
54. Shh!
Keep your voice down.
Copy !req
55. People will hear.
Copy !req
56. Thing is, I already had my
appendix out when I was a kid.
Copy !req
57. Then what did
they remove?
Copy !req
58. Some red thing—
I didn't recognize it.
Copy !req
59. But how could Francine tell
you weren't listening?
Copy !req
60. Didn't you smile while
she was speaking?
Copy !req
61. Of course.
Copy !req
62. Did you remember also to nod?
Copy !req
63. Uh, yeah.
Copy !req
64. Then that's
all you can do.
Copy !req
65. There's no third
thing to listening.
Copy !req
66. I suppose, but I'd still like
to have sex sometime this year.
Copy !req
67. She's withholding sex?
Copy !req
68. Why didn't you
say something?
Copy !req
69. Pharmacology Department?
Copy !req
70. Send up a bottle of
Estrocillin right away!
Copy !req
71. What's Estrocillin?
Copy !req
72. It's an experimental drug
the CIA has designed
Copy !req
73. to enable male agents to listen
to female intelligence targets
Copy !req
74. and actually retain the
information they tell them.
Copy !req
75. Damn it, why is this fridge
always so full?
Copy !req
76. That's it. I quit!
Copy !req
77. Wait, I can't quit.
Copy !req
78. I've got a family.
Copy !req
79. Unfortunately, I've already
accepted your resignation.
Copy !req
80. Ah, Trish. There you are.
Copy !req
81. Here's the Estrocillin
you requested, sir.
Copy !req
82. Here you go, Smith.
Copy !req
83. Take these,
and in no time you'll be
Copy !req
84. connecting with your wife
all night long.
Copy !req
85. Gentlemen,
Copy !req
86. this is the perfect opportunity,
while I have you both here.
Copy !req
87. I wanted to let
you know that...
Copy !req
88. What do you hear, sir?
Copy !req
89. Is it the hum
of an AC unit?
Copy !req
90. Actually, mine's whales.
Copy !req
91. Well, we've spent all the money,
but we have our location.
Copy !req
92. Wow. So much potential.
Right?
Copy !req
93. All that's left is to figure out
what we're gonna sell,
Copy !req
94. where we're gonna get it
and how to run
Copy !req
95. and properly manage
a successful business.
Copy !req
96. The finishing touches.
Copy !req
97. Uh, uh, wait, wait, Francine,
uh, don't go to sleep.
Copy !req
98. I never got to ask you
how your day was.
Copy !req
99. Very funny, Stan.
Copy !req
100. No, seriously.
I want to know.
Copy !req
101. How was your day?
Copy !req
102. Well...
Copy !req
103. I just wasn't feeling it.
Copy !req
104. You know what I mean?
I don't.
Copy !req
105. But I want to.
Copy !req
106. Elaborate.
Copy !req
107. then she told her
that she'd never said that
Copy !req
108. to either of them in the first
place, least of all her.
Copy !req
109. Not to her, certainly.
Oh, and, Francine,
Copy !req
110. I'm ready to take
your listening test.
Copy !req
111. Stan, there's no
time for a test.
Copy !req
112. I want you immediately.
Copy !req
113. And I, you.
Copy !req
114. But first I got to pee.
Copy !req
115. My insides are squirming
like eels.
Copy !req
116. What are you doing to me, girl?
Copy !req
117. Oh, Stan. Pee fast.
Copy !req
118. Bathroom phone.
Copy !req
119. Smith! Tell me you
haven't taken the Estrocillin!
Copy !req
120. Why? What's the prob...
Copy !req
121. Oh, my God, sir!
Copy !req
122. Either I've gone crazy,
or I've turned into a woman!
Copy !req
123. What's the difference?
Copy !req
124. Hey, screw you!
Copy !req
125. Stan, get out here
and ravage me.
Copy !req
126. I have a headache
from all that screaming.
Copy !req
127. Well, not to compete
with you,
Copy !req
128. but I have a headache
from my skull changing shape.
Copy !req
129. How did this happen?
I don't know.
Copy !req
130. All I did was take this pill,
but the woman at the lab said
Copy !req
131. nothing about recommended dosage
or possible side effects.
Copy !req
132. It's imperative that you
only take half a pill.
Copy !req
133. A whole pill will
transform you into a woman.
Copy !req
134. You know what? I'm gonna
start making them smaller.
Copy !req
135. "Increases comprehension
of female chatter."
Copy !req
136. So this is why you were
listening so well.
Copy !req
137. I'm sorry. I was just trying
to be a better husband.
Copy !req
138. Don't I get points
for effort?
Copy !req
139. Yeah, I guess.
Copy !req
140. Don't worry.
Copy !req
141. We'll figure this out.
Copy !req
142. Are... are your boobs
bigger than mine?
Copy !req
143. Just different, is all.
Copy !req
144. In size.
Copy !req
145. So what's with
the family meeting?
Copy !req
146. What the hell? Dad?
Copy !req
147. Kind of.
Copy !req
148. Kids, your father's...
Copy !req
149. a woman now.
Copy !req
150. We all need to process this
as a family,
Copy !req
151. so if you have any questions,
let's hear them.
Copy !req
152. I-I don't understand.
Copy !req
153. That's not a
question, Hayley.
Copy !req
154. And you don't have to
raise your hand, Steve.
Copy !req
155. How are you
a woman now?
Copy !req
156. In every way. From my
ridiculous split ends
Copy !req
157. to these boots I'm
already sick of.
Copy !req
158. Wait, so d-does
this mean...
Copy !req
159. Steve had his hand raised.
Steve.
Copy !req
160. So, like, are you
gonna wear a bra now?
Copy !req
161. Absolutely not. Everyone knows
if they're flawless,
Copy !req
162. you can go braless.
Next question.
Copy !req
163. Will you...
Oh, Steve beat you by a hair.
Copy !req
164. Are trains
becoming obsolete?
Copy !req
165. On the contrary, Steve.
Copy !req
166. Trains are more relevant
than ever.
Copy !req
167. Now Hayley.
Copy !req
168. A-Am I the only one
struggling with this here?
Copy !req
169. You found a book,
right, Stan?
Copy !req
170. They didn't have one
where a dad becomes a mom,
Copy !req
171. so maybe read it backwards.
Copy !req
172. How does it work
with-with you guys then?
Copy !req
173. Are you still together?
Copy !req
174. Yes. We love each other
very much.
Copy !req
175. So... you're lesbians now?
Copy !req
176. I... I don't know.
Copy !req
177. Hey! I figured out what we're
gonna sell for our business.
Copy !req
178. Stan's suits!
Copy !req
179. He's got hundreds of them
that he doesn't need anymore.
Copy !req
180. Is he dead?
Is he finally dead?
Copy !req
181. Can I go free?
Copy !req
182. No, he's a woman now.
Copy !req
183. Oh.
Copy !req
184. A woman fish?
Copy !req
185. So... lesbians?
Copy !req
186. Lesbians.
Copy !req
187. Don't-don't do that.
Copy !req
188. I-I don't feel
confident there.
Copy !req
189. Let me do this.
Copy !req
190. Hey. Ow, ow.
Copy !req
191. Stan, what are
you doing?
Copy !req
192. I don't know, but it feels like
we're trying to make a fire.
Copy !req
193. This isn't working.
Copy !req
194. Well, until the
CIA fixes you,
Copy !req
195. I guess sex is
off the table.
Copy !req
196. 'Cause we are
not lesbians.
Copy !req
197. We should tell the kids.
Copy !req
198. Kids, we are not lesbians!
Copy !req
199. We tried,
but it was a no go!
Copy !req
200. Please stop
involving me in this!
Copy !req
201. I am a child!
Copy !req
202. Agent Smith
reporting for duty.
Copy !req
203. Come in. Let me
get a look at you.
Copy !req
204. Do a quick turn for us.
Copy !req
205. You really do cut quite
a figure as a woman, Smith.
Copy !req
206. You look exactly
as I imagined.
Copy !req
207. Only I drew the
hair a bit short.
Copy !req
208. Well, that's
easily fixed.
Copy !req
209. There it is.
Copy !req
210. Any news from the lab on
reversing... all this?
Copy !req
211. Not yet,
but I'll keep you posted.
Copy !req
212. Now off to work with you.
Copy !req
213. Go for Bullock.
Copy !req
214. Sir, we've successfully
engineered a way
Copy !req
215. to reverse the effects
of Estrocillin.
Copy !req
216. Oh, that's exciting.
Copy !req
217. Shall I notify
Agent Smith?
I'll do it.
Copy !req
218. We have a thing where he
likes to hear things from me.
Copy !req
219. It's a thing.
Copy !req
220. We have it.
Copy !req
221. This fridge is always full.
Copy !req
222. We need a second one.
Copy !req
223. That way, we could
have one for drinks
Copy !req
224. and the other one
for people's bag lunches.
Copy !req
225. Hmm, not a bad idea.
Copy !req
226. I think I should go to
the deputy director with this.
Copy !req
227. Are you done
having your idea?
Copy !req
228. Can I get the
Sriracha now?
Copy !req
229. Thanks for taking me out.
Copy !req
230. I really needed this.
Copy !req
231. The girls at work have been
really rough on me.
Copy !req
232. No respect.
Copy !req
233. I'm like the Rodney Dangerfield
of that office
Copy !req
234. because I basically
am dead to them.
Copy !req
235. Excuse me,
are you Megan Fox?
Copy !req
236. No.
Copy !req
237. So you're just
a regular fox.
Copy !req
238. Stan, as a woman
with an unnecessarily large
Copy !req
239. and perky bosom, you're
gonna get lots of attention.
Copy !req
240. Guys will say anything
to try and pick you up,
Copy !req
241. and some of it's
gonna be tempting.
Copy !req
242. So I don't look
like Megan Fox?
Copy !req
243. I know it's all new
and confusing.
Copy !req
244. Just be careful.
Copy !req
245. Hopefully, you won't have
to be a woman much longer.
Copy !req
246. I'll get us another round.
Copy !req
247. At The K&R Suit Experience,
we have hundreds of suits,
Copy !req
248. in the only color
you'll ever need.
Copy !req
249. Blue, blue, this shade of blue!
Copy !req
250. All suits in stock
are 42 regular.
Copy !req
251. Smaller than that?
Get it tailored.
Copy !req
252. There are tailors
all over the city.
Copy !req
253. Open a phone book.
Copy !req
254. Are you bigger than 42 regular?
Copy !req
255. We can't help you.
Copy !req
256. Look elsewhere!
Copy !req
257. These prices are so low,
they're driving us mad.
Copy !req
258. Why are we burning
these suits?
Copy !req
259. For warmth?
Copy !req
260. My grip on reality
is weakening!
Copy !req
261. Must... lower... prices.
Copy !req
262. K&R Suit Experience
in Little Detroit.
Copy !req
263. Next to the abandoned
police station.
Copy !req
264. If you see "God is Dead"
written on the side
Copy !req
265. of the collapsing overpass,
then you've gone too far!
Copy !req
266. What do I owe you?
Copy !req
267. Your drinks have
been paid for, miss.
Copy !req
268. Shut up.
Copy !req
269. Deputy Director Bullock.
Copy !req
270. What are you doing here?
Copy !req
271. Is there news
from the lab?
Copy !req
272. Yes, and I'm afraid
it isn't good.
Copy !req
273. There's no cure
for this.
Copy !req
274. You'll be a beautiful
woman forever.
Copy !req
275. Oh, my God.
Copy !req
276. No time for an honest
emotional response.
Copy !req
277. We also have urgent CIA
business to attend to.
Copy !req
278. Oh, uh, let me just
tell Francine.
Copy !req
279. As I said, no time.
Now let's go.
Copy !req
280. Yes, sir. I'll grab my pashmina
and meet you out front.
Copy !req
281. See that woman over there?
Copy !req
282. I'm going to rail her.
Copy !req
283. Oh! We got one!
Copy !req
284. I love the family
atmosphere here.
Copy !req
285. Have you seen
my husband?
Copy !req
286. Six foot tall?
Dark hair?
Copy !req
287. Body of a woman?
Copy !req
288. Oh, that lady.
Copy !req
289. She left about 20 minutes ago
with some guy.
Copy !req
290. What? Do you remember
anything about him?
Copy !req
291. Not much. Only that he was bald,
worked for the CIA,
Copy !req
292. and sounded like The Beatles.
Copy !req
293. Not when they sing,
but when they do interviews.
Copy !req
294. Bullock!
Copy !req
295. So, what's the
urgent business?
Copy !req
296. Oh, that. Uh,
yes, well, um...
Copy !req
297. Ah. Mission cancelled.
Copy !req
298. Looks like another gumshoe
found Carmen Sandiego for us.
Copy !req
299. Well, that is good news.
Copy !req
300. I guess you can
take me back to the bar.
Copy !req
301. Or we could just
keep driving.
Copy !req
302. It's rare that I
get one-on-one time
Copy !req
303. with my employees.
Copy !req
304. Actually, I was hoping
to talk to you about a solution
Copy !req
305. to the break room
fridge problem that,
Copy !req
306. frankly, I'm pretty
excited about.
Copy !req
307. You ever see one
of these bad boys?
Copy !req
308. Not many people get the chance
to see the moon while moving.
Copy !req
309. It's...
Copy !req
310. Are you okay?
Copy !req
311. God, I am so sick
of that happening.
Copy !req
312. But let's not let
it ruin our night.
Copy !req
313. Anyway, about my idea for
the fridge in the break room...
Copy !req
314. Yes, I can't wait
to discuss it.
Copy !req
315. But we should probably
do it somewhere indoors.
Copy !req
316. Where could we go?
Where could we go?
Copy !req
317. I suppose we could
go to my place.
Copy !req
318. I mean, we're already here.
Copy !req
319. Not one customer all day.
Copy !req
320. I mean, that dog came in,
Copy !req
321. but he was just looking
for a place to die.
Copy !req
322. Eh, let's get
out of here.
Copy !req
323. Thanks a lot, Obama.
Copy !req
324. Is this the warehouse
dance party?
Copy !req
325. Huh?
Copy !req
326. Flyer says 50 bucks.
Copy !req
327. This is the place, right?
Copy !req
328. Oh, uh, yeah.
Copy !req
329. Yeah, this is the
place you think it is.
Copy !req
330. Head on in.
Copy !req
331. Head on in.
Copy !req
332. Text your friends,
tell them you found it.
Copy !req
333. Stan?
Copy !req
334. Stan?
Copy !req
335. Sorry to interrupt
your science,
Copy !req
336. but have you seen
my husband Stan Smith?
Copy !req
337. Anatomically a woman.
Copy !req
338. Agent Smith is
still a woman?
Copy !req
339. Well, yeah.
Copy !req
340. We're still waiting on a cure.
Copy !req
341. There is a cure.
Copy !req
342. A simple pill that'll
turn Stan back into a man.
Copy !req
343. Bullock was
supposed to tell him.
Copy !req
344. Apparently they have a thing.
Copy !req
345. Wait a minute.
Copy !req
346. Then Bullock's
keeping Stan a woman
Copy !req
347. so he can sleep with him.
Copy !req
348. I have to find out
where they are.
Copy !req
349. Well, if Bullock's
trying to seal the deal,
Copy !req
350. they're probably at his house.
Copy !req
351. That's where he likes
to have his sex.
Copy !req
352. There.
Two glasses of zin,
Copy !req
353. some pickled ginger,
a bowl of clementines.
Copy !req
354. The scene is set to
discuss work concerns.
Copy !req
355. Well, as we both know,
Copy !req
356. the situation with the fridge
has become untenable.
Copy !req
357. My proposal:
a second fridge.
Copy !req
358. Where would we put it,
you ask?
Copy !req
359. Put it where the Fruitopia
vending machine is.
Copy !req
360. I mean, we can keep waiting
for the guy to come back
Copy !req
361. and restock it,
but it's been 12 years.
Copy !req
362. It's time to move on.
Copy !req
363. Intriguing.
Copy !req
364. Very intriguing.
Copy !req
365. Oh, I'm so glad
you're into it.
Copy !req
366. Open.
Copy !req
367. Yes, enjoy that, Smith.
Copy !req
368. It's the last thing
you'll put in your mouth
Copy !req
369. a little at a time.
Copy !req
370. Come on, come on!
Get out of my way!
Copy !req
371. I love what
I've heard so far.
Copy !req
372. You have to
tell me more.
Copy !req
373. Well, I'm just saying,
if we have two fridges,
Copy !req
374. then we essentially
double our capacity.
Copy !req
375. You know, I have
over four swords.
Copy !req
376. Hai-yah!
Copy !req
377. Oops.
Copy !req
378. That's the exact
same car as mine.
Copy !req
379. Oh, no!
Copy !req
380. Do I have a man's haircut?
Copy !req
381. And people don't want to put
their lunches in the door
Copy !req
382. because it sometimes
squishes the sandwiches.
Copy !req
383. So, Smith, now that you're
a woman permanently,
Copy !req
384. you and your wife probably
won't be getting it on, eh?
Copy !req
385. No, I guess not.
Copy !req
386. We'll just be friends.
Copy !req
387. Best friends.
Copy !req
388. Seems like a best friend
Copy !req
389. would want you to have
all your needs met.
Copy !req
390. Sir, what are you saying?
Copy !req
391. Look in the mirror, bro.
Copy !req
392. You're a red-hot mama and your
body is crying out for a man.
Copy !req
393. Let me be that man.
Copy !req
394. I... I-I don't know.
Copy !req
395. You're telling me you haven't
wondered what it'd be like
Copy !req
396. if one of us accidentally
changed genders
Copy !req
397. after a horrible
pharmacological mishap?
Copy !req
398. That's what I thought.
Copy !req
399. Now, what if this happened?
Copy !req
400. That's... that's not so bad.
Copy !req
401. You're right.
Copy !req
402. It's not so bad.
Copy !req
403. I bought him
in Thailand.
Copy !req
404. You can drown him
if it pleases you.
Copy !req
405. Stan! Stan!
Copy !req
406. Oh, no.
Copy !req
407. Mmm, mmm, mmm.
Copy !req
408. Still warm.
Copy !req
409. I can't believe this
is about to happen.
Copy !req
410. Wow.
Copy !req
411. When I had my idea
about the fridge, I...
Copy !req
412. I never thought it
would lead to this.
Copy !req
413. Your idea about what now?
Copy !req
414. The break room fridge.
Copy !req
415. Oh, I hate the break room
fridge; it's always so packed.
Copy !req
416. Someone's got to do
something about that.
Copy !req
417. Are you kidding me?
Copy !req
418. No!
Copy !req
419. You've just been pretending
to listen to me all night!
Copy !req
420. Do you know
how disrespectful that is?
Copy !req
421. Tell me more.
Copy !req
422. You're still
not listening!
Copy !req
423. Oh, Francine was right.
Copy !req
424. If you love someone, you have to
at least try to listen to them.
Copy !req
425. I finally know how to be
the man she deserves,
Copy !req
426. but I'm stuck
as a woman forever.
Copy !req
427. Oh, Stan.
Copy !req
428. Francine?
Copy !req
429. I heard everything,
and I'm so glad you understand.
Copy !req
430. And you're not stuck.
Copy !req
431. There's an antidote
that turns you back into a man.
Copy !req
432. Well, that's great news.
Copy !req
433. And he's known the whole time.
Copy !req
434. Is that true?
Copy !req
435. Unbelievable.
Copy !req
436. I'm keeping the sword.
Copy !req
437. I hope this won't
make things weird at work.
Copy !req
438. Wow.
Copy !req
439. Regrowing a penis was...
Copy !req
440. not as painful
as you'd think.
Copy !req
441. I'm so glad
you're back.
Copy !req
442. No, hold on.
Copy !req
443. Pop quiz.
Copy !req
444. Who did I talk
to at the CIA?
Copy !req
445. Oh, uh, you talked
to the lab lady.
Copy !req
446. Good. And her name?
Copy !req
447. Aw, come on. Um...
Copy !req
448. It starts with a letter
in the alphabet.
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449. Uh, let's see, it's...
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450. it's-it's Blowgus?
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451. The woman's name is Blowgus?
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452. You know what,
I don't remember either.
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453. We're a successful business!
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454. I knew it. I knew
we could do it!
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455. Lazer just OD'd in the bathroom.
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456. He's dead.
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457. Oh, crap! Cops!
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458. Who's responsible
for this?
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459. Who's in charge here?
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460. Oh, uh, you know, I think
it's a guy named Lazer.
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461. Haven't seen him
in a while.
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462. Bye! Have a beautiful time.
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