1. Smells lovely, that.Copy !req
2. Well, it is your birthday.Copy !req
3. I don't mind
giving you a full English once a year.Copy !req
4. - Happy birthday, old man.Copy !req
5. I'm married to an old man.Copy !req
6. - And you're getting younger, are ya?
- I am, you cheeky get.Copy !req
7. I'm taking a special pill.Copy !req
8. Oh, what's that? Black pudding?Copy !req
9. - From the butchers and all.
- It's very bad for me.Copy !req
10. I know, but you like it very much.Copy !req
11. I like you more, though.Copy !req
12. Yeah. Only when I'm doing you a fry-up.Copy !req
13. No, no. Christmas as well,
when you've got your suzzies on and that.Copy !req
14. Hey!Copy !req
15. You leave my suspenders out of this.
You'll get yourself excited.Copy !req
16. - What do you mean, "get myself"?Copy !req
17. Hey!Copy !req
18. - Maybe later.
- Come on, love. I'll only be five minutes.Copy !req
19. - You're never five minutes.Copy !req
20. - Five minutes.
- She won't get up till gone 12.Copy !req
21. She won't sleep till 12 on her dad's 50th.Copy !req
22. Later. Come on, be good.
Concentrate on cards. Birthday cards.Copy !req
23. You're a spoilsport.Copy !req
24. Eggs, scrambled or poached?Copy !req
25. - Fried.
- You're dying young.Copy !req
26. - I'm dyin' happy.
- [Amanda scoffs, laughs]Copy !req
27. Me dad and Jean.Copy !req
28. Written by Jean.Copy !req
29. A fiver.Copy !req
30. Can't even buy a pint
for a fiver these days, can ya?Copy !req
31. No.Copy !req
32. Aww. It's a lovely picture.Copy !req
33. He's made you look handsome.Copy !req
34. - It's good, innit?
- [Amanda, softly] Yeah.Copy !req
35. He's put the effort in.Copy !req
36. - Shit. Dad? Dad, have you seen the van?
- Eh?Copy !req
37. - The van outside. Have you seen?
- No.Copy !req
38. - I…
- Huh?Copy !req
39. [Eddie, under breath] Oh, fuck.Copy !req
40. - Dad, I…
- Shit.Copy !req
41. I'm sorry. I…Copy !req
42. - I dunno what…
- Hey, it's not your fault.Copy !req
43. - They're such dickheads.
- Hey, language.Copy !req
44. Sorry.Copy !req
45. - Did you see anything, Eileen?
- No, nothing, Eddie.Copy !req
46. - You didn't see a thing, no?
- Sorry. It's been quiet this morning.Copy !req
47. - Right, go and phone the police.
- Again, you think?Copy !req
48. That's what he said.
Anything happens, give him a ring.Copy !req
49. Okay.Copy !req
50. - Dad, I'm sorry.
- Come here. It's not your fault. Come.Copy !req
51. It's all right.Copy !req
52. Happy birthday.Copy !req
53. - They're all out, aren't they?Copy !req
54. Did you see anything, mate?Copy !req
55. - No?
- No, mate!Copy !req
56. - None of youse? Did you see anything?
- No. Sorry.Copy !req
57. Fuck.Copy !req
58. Right, a bit of soap and water
will get this off.Copy !req
59. Can't believe you never saw nothing.Copy !req
60. - When was the last time you seen the van?
- When I parked up last night.Copy !req
61. - What time was that?
- Dunno. Must've been about eight o'clock.Copy !req
62. - Eight o'clock?
- Yeah. About eight.Copy !req
63. Eight o'clock till now.Copy !req
64. "Nonce."Copy !req
65. Hang on.Copy !req
66. N-O-N-S-E.Copy !req
67. Yeah, I can see that.Copy !req
68. Well, I don't know.
Is that for me to decide?Copy !req
69. Maybe they think Jamie's a nonce.
Maybe they think Eddie's one.Copy !req
70. Do we take a picture?Copy !req
71. You don't need to come.Copy !req
72. Me husband'll take it off.
Should we take a picture?Copy !req
73. No. Sorry, love, I'm not waiting.
I'll take three pictures for you, okay?Copy !req
74. And I'll get me daughter to email them
over to you, okay? Thank you, love.Copy !req
75. Thank you.Copy !req
76. Take three pictures and email them to Sam.Copy !req
77. She's in me email contacts.Copy !req
78. Little twats.Copy !req
79. Hey.Copy !req
80. - Calm down.
- It's your birthday.Copy !req
81. Yeah, but they weren't to know that,
were they? Just calm down.Copy !req
82. Think of our Lisa.Copy !req
83. Thanks for letting me know.Copy !req
84. I'm not telling you
what you should be doing.Copy !req
85. I'm just saying,
let's think of her, shall we?Copy !req
86. - Eddie, I've had enough of this.Copy !req
87. Please, love, don't start.
Don't say anything.Copy !req
88. - What am I saying?
- Look, you know what you're saying.Copy !req
89. And it's not happening. We're not having
this conversation. Not again, love.Copy !req
90. Right?Copy !req
91. We've been through it all.Copy !req
92. He's in the dock in four weeks.
Everyone'll be having a stare.Copy !req
93. Yeah, but not at us. Right?Copy !req
94. And he's behind a big screen, isn't he?
Look, they're hiding him, that's all.Copy !req
95. Yeah, they're doing a great job.Copy !req
96. They're protecting him. We've been through
all this with the lawyers.Copy !req
97. This isn't gonna get any better.Copy !req
98. - Me mum says she can get you work.
- I don't need your mum to get me work!Copy !req
99. What would I want your mum
to get me work for, eh?Copy !req
100. I've got work here.
Love, I've got lads that depend on me.Copy !req
101. I know that, but—Copy !req
102. Love, she's got college, hasn't she?Copy !req
103. Right? Do you wanna take her
out of college?Copy !req
104. Do you wanna ruin her fucking life
as well, eh?Copy !req
105. And you think moving back to Liverpool
it'll be any better?Copy !req
106. Because I promise you, it'll be ten times
fucking worse, and you know that.Copy !req
107. You know that, love.
You know it'll be worse.Copy !req
108. We've done nothing wrong, have we?Copy !req
109. - Have we done anything wrong? No.
- No.Copy !req
110. No, so we're not moving.
We're not moving, Mand. End of story.Copy !req
111. - Shit.
- It's all right.Copy !req
112. I'll clean… I'm so… I'm sorry about that.Copy !req
113. I'm sorry about that. I'll clean it up.Copy !req
114. - Dad?
- Hey, what are you doing there?Copy !req
115. You shouldn't be listening.Copy !req
116. Don't worry. I'll clean this off.Copy !req
117. Did you send the email?Copy !req
118. Yeah. Yeah. Um…Copy !req
119. - There's your phone.
- Thanks.Copy !req
120. Who are you texting?Copy !req
121. Billy.Copy !req
122. Oh right. And how is that?Copy !req
123. It's none of your business.Copy !req
124. Is Dad all right?Copy !req
125. Your dad's all right.Copy !req
126. I'm just giving him space,
because that's what I do.Copy !req
127. He loves that van.Copy !req
128. He doesn't love it. It's just a van.Copy !req
129. I don't know. I don't…Copy !req
130. I don't think soap
and water's gonna do anything to it.Copy !req
131. I don't know anything about paint. Do you?Copy !req
132. - You're fuming, aren't you?
- No, I'm not.Copy !req
133. I'm not.Copy !req
134. I… just don't understand
who the nonce is meant to be.Copy !req
135. I mean, he's 13. The fucking idiots
probably don't even know what it means.Copy !req
136. And, you know, it's obviously not Dad,
and I just… Jamie, he wasn't…Copy !req
137. He…Copy !req
138. I found myself in his room the other day,
giving it a hoover.Copy !req
139. Yeah?Copy !req
140. I didn't know what to do, really.Copy !req
141. I can't go in.Copy !req
142. - You're all right.Copy !req
143. Is Billy looking after you?Copy !req
144. Mum, Billy doesn't look after me.
Can you stop saying that?Copy !req
145. I can… I can look after myself, right?
I do look after myself.Copy !req
146. You know, no one's…Copy !req
147. No one's written "nonce" on my locker
at school, so there's that.Copy !req
148. - Okay.
- Mand, where's that big sponge?Copy !req
149. It's under the sink.Copy !req
150. - It's not! I can't find it!
- It is. Just look.Copy !req
151. I'm looking!Copy !req
152. All right, I'll be down now.
I'd better go and help your dad.Copy !req
153. Want a cup of tea?Copy !req
154. No, I'm all right.Copy !req
155. Okay. I love you.Copy !req
156. I love you too.Copy !req
157. - Did you find it?
- Yeah.Copy !req
158. - Want a cup of tea?
- No, you're all right.Copy !req
159. - You all right, Eileen?
- Yeah, Eddie, thanks.Copy !req
160. - Do you want a chair, love?
- No.Copy !req
161. - A chair to rest your legs?
- No, I'm all right.Copy !req
162. - Fancy a brew, love?
- No, I'm fine.Copy !req
163. Might have a bit of birthday cake,
if you want some.Copy !req
164. No? Fuck off, then, you nosy old cow.Copy !req
165. - All right, nonce!Copy !req
166. Hey? Hey!Copy !req
167. - Hey!
- All right, nonce!Copy !req
168. Did you do that to my van?Copy !req
169. Did ya?Copy !req
170. Hey, nonce!Copy !req
171. Excuse, love. Watch out. Sorry.Copy !req
172. - It's not coming off.
- Isn't it?Copy !req
173. No.Copy !req
174. - Do you want to try some bleach?
- That won't work.Copy !req
175. Sorry.Copy !req
176. - We'll have to go to Wainwrights.
- Now?Copy !req
177. - Yeah, now. We'll have to go now.
- Why?Copy !req
178. Because I need to get it off,
Mand. I can't…Copy !req
179. I can't turn up for work
with that on my fucking van, can I? Hey?Copy !req
180. - I know, but—
- Can I? No, I can't.Copy !req
181. So, come on, let's go now.
Won't be long. Come on, let's go. Lisa!Copy !req
182. - Lisa, get downstairs, love!
- What?Copy !req
183. Put your coat on.
We're going to Wainwrights.Copy !req
184. - Can't I just stay here?
- No, you can't stay here.Copy !req
185. Someone vandalized the van.Copy !req
186. Who knows what they'll do next?
Not leaving you here on your own.Copy !req
187. Why would I wanna go?Copy !req
188. - Because I'm asking you to go!
- Eddie, I've got the breakfast on.Copy !req
189. Girls, please!
Please, girls, do me a favor.Copy !req
190. Please, help me out, love. I'm trying.Copy !req
191. All right. Yeah, we'll all go.Copy !req
192. - We'll get the day back.
- Yeah? Hey?Copy !req
193. - We'll get the day back.
- Okay, yeah, yeah.Copy !req
194. - Yeah.
- Get the day back.Copy !req
195. - I'll turn this off.
- It is me birthday, isn't it? Hey?Copy !req
196. Let's get the day back.Copy !req
197. So, going to Wainwrights
is some big birthday treat, then?Copy !req
198. Yeah. It is for me.Copy !req
199. I used to have fuck all when I was a kid.
Count yourself lucky.Copy !req
200. Didn't even get a tangerine, me.
Right, in you go.Copy !req
201. - Lock that door properly, love.
- I have.Copy !req
202. Keep your eye on our house,
Eileen, would you?Copy !req
203. Of course I will, love.Copy !req
204. - Yeah?
- I'll keep an eye on it.Copy !req
205. Make sure you text
Neighborhood Watch as well.Copy !req
206. Eddie.Copy !req
207. Well, just saying.Copy !req
208. - Right on the fence.
- Ta-ra, love!Copy !req
209. Fucking nosy old bag.Copy !req
210. Right. Let's get the day back,
shall we? Hey?Copy !req
211. - Yeah.
- That's what you said, didn't ya?Copy !req
212. Lise, put some music on, love.Copy !req
213. Make sure you pick a good tune
with a bass line.Copy !req
214. What are you on about?Copy !req
215. All good music
has to have a proper bass line.Copy !req
216. Know what I mean?
You need a good bass guitar.Copy !req
217. None of this plinky-plonk shite
or your drum and bass bollocks.Copy !req
218. Give me a proper bass line
I can sink me teeth into.Copy !req
219. You talk such rubbish.Copy !req
220. And another thing,Copy !req
221. when we get back from Wainwrights,
we're going on an outing.Copy !req
222. - An outing?
- Yes, we're going on an outing.Copy !req
223. A family outing.Copy !req
224. And what will you do
on your family outing?Copy !req
225. I don't know.Copy !req
226. - Climb a hill or something.
- A hill?Copy !req
227. Yeah. And we'll go to the zoo.Copy !req
228. I'm not going to a zoo.
I'm almost 18.Copy !req
229. - All right, we'll go ice skating, then.
- You, ice skating?Copy !req
230. Yeah. What's wrong with me ice skating?Copy !req
231. - All right, we'll go to the pictures.
- Yeah, I'd, um… I do that.Copy !req
232. - If I had to do anything, I'd do that.
- Yeah?Copy !req
233. - Yeah.
- Pictures?Copy !req
234. - Yeah.
- All right, sweet. Pictures it is, then.Copy !req
235. - Mand, do you fancy the pictures?
- Yeah.Copy !req
236. Yeah? All right. Have a look
on t'internet and see what's on.Copy !req
237. What's got into you?Copy !req
238. Nothing's got into me, love.Copy !req
239. I'm just… interested in solving…Copy !req
240. - Solving the problem of today.
- The problem of today.Copy !req
241. And I'm helping.Copy !req
242. Thank you.Copy !req
243. "Solving the problem of today"?Copy !req
244. - It's what the therapist has been saying.
- What are we solving?Copy !req
245. Nothing.Copy !req
246. I just think it'd be a good idea
for us to go to the pictures. That's all.Copy !req
247. Yeah. We'll have breakfast first,
though, hey?Copy !req
248. Yeah.Copy !req
249. She's making me a full English.
With black pudding and everything.Copy !req
250. - Black pudding?
- Mm.Copy !req
251. I got some in for your dad.Copy !req
252. - You know, you are dying young.
- That's what I said.Copy !req
253. And I'm having fried bread.Copy !req
254. And I've got some lovely bread in
for that as well.Copy !req
255. - She's a fine woman, your mother.Copy !req
256. So you tell me.Copy !req
257. - Hey!
- Sorry.Copy !req
258. Right, so that's it, then. Sorted.
We've got our day back, kids.Copy !req
259. Come here, get the stuff,
back to the gaff,Copy !req
260. me and our Lise'll get the paint off
while you cook the breakfast,Copy !req
261. we'll all get changed, go to the pictures,
and have a massive tub of popcorn.Copy !req
262. - Ooh, yeah.
- Can we go for a Chinese?Copy !req
263. - Yes, we can.
- Yes!Copy !req
264. What do you want?Copy !req
265. - I want all of it.Copy !req
266. - All of it?
- All of it. I'm so hungry.Copy !req
267. Okay.Copy !req
268. It's ages since I've gone to the pictures.Copy !req
269. - Yeah.
- Found a tune yet?Copy !req
270. I dunno. I don't really know
what's got bass.Copy !req
271. Put on…Copy !req
272. Just type in, "a-ha."Copy !req
273. Like, "a-ha."Copy !req
274. "Take On Me."Copy !req
275. - What? That hasn't got a bass line.
- It has!Copy !req
276. - No, it hasn't.
- It has!Copy !req
277. - They didn't even have a bass player.
- They did. Paul.Copy !req
278. - Who?
- Paul.Copy !req
279. He played the bass.
He could play the drums and everything.Copy !req
280. - Are you sure?
- I'm positive. I was in the fan club.Copy !req
281. - Oh my God.Copy !req
282. - You was as well, weren't ya?
- I was.Copy !req
283. Your ma had posters on her wall.
She had badges, scarves.Copy !req
284. - I loved those badges.
- You have never told me that, ever.Copy !req
285. Do you know, years ago, right, early days,Copy !req
286. when me and your dad were just going out,
it was at one of our first school discos,Copy !req
287. and you decided to test me.Copy !req
288. - It wasn't a test.
- It was.Copy !req
289. It wasn't a test. I'm telling ya.Copy !req
290. Your dad, right,
he wore this daft pink wig.Copy !req
291. Everyone was laughing, but your dad
never cared when people laughed at him.Copy !req
292. - Hey, I loved that wig. That wig was boss.Copy !req
293. And it was the middle of the night,
so, like, no one was dancing yet.Copy !req
294. And we were what? About 13?Copy !req
295. - We were in third year.
- That's Year 9 in your language.Copy !req
296. And the DJ was Mr. Barnes,
our geography teacher.Copy !req
297. - Slaphead.
- Yeah. Slaphead.Copy !req
298. He was getting desperate
'cause no one was dancing,Copy !req
299. 'cause, like, everyone was just too shy.Copy !req
300. - A-ha was top of the charts at the time.
- Yeah.Copy !req
301. And your dad… This was bonkers.Copy !req
302. He starts dancing on his own
in the middle of the dance floor.Copy !req
303. - No, it wasn't like that.
- It was.Copy !req
304. Right. No, Barnesy was a great teacher,
right? But he was a crap DJ.Copy !req
305. I was just giving him a hand.
I was helping him out.Copy !req
306. And everyone was just standing there,
laughing their heads off at your dad.Copy !req
307. - They weren't laughing.
- They was.Copy !req
308. No one was laughing, love.Copy !req
309. They were loving
me Northern soul dance moves.Copy !req
310. - Northern soul?
- Yeah.Copy !req
311. - Is it that one?
- I was a brilliant dancer.Copy !req
312. - You was.
- You know I was.Copy !req
313. But then, right,Copy !req
314. he starts slipping and sliding
all over the floor.Copy !req
315. Yeah, but tell the truth why, though.
Tell her why.Copy !req
316. - Why?
- Right? No, tell the truth.Copy !req
317. I bought these pair of red
and white bowling shoes, right, from a…Copy !req
318. No, from a charity shop
to go with me wig. Right?Copy !req
319. But I had no idea that these shoes,
they had no grip.Copy !req
320. - Because they're bowling shoes!
- They had no grip.Copy !req
321. So then… he slides, slips,Copy !req
322. splits his legs in two,
landed flat on his face.Copy !req
323. - Bosh.Copy !req
324. And then he stood up,
and he'd smacked his nose.Copy !req
325. And there was just blood
hammering down his face,Copy !req
326. and everyone was just pissing themselves.Copy !req
327. And then he said, "I'm bleeding here!"Copy !req
328. For years in school, everyone'd
just shout it at you, wouldn't they?Copy !req
329. They'd be like, "I'm bleeding here!"Copy !req
330. - Fucking shitty shoes.
- It was funny, though, Ed.Copy !req
331. I'm glad you found it funny, love.Copy !req
332. I loved them all.
I would've done anything for any of them.Copy !req
333. Right. She would've done
anything for any of 'em.Copy !req
334. If your ma would've had her way,
you'd have looked completely different.Copy !req
335. You'd have looked like one of them…Copy !req
336. You'd have had a Norwegian kipper.
You know what I mean?Copy !req
337. You'd have looked like Erling Haaland
or something like that.Copy !req
338. - It's coming up now, where you slipped.
- You remember it?Copy !req
339. "I'm bleeding here!"Copy !req
340. The rest of the night,
we just stayed sat together, didn't we?Copy !req
341. I couldn't dance again
in them shoes, could I?Copy !req
342. Then you walked me home.
Well, I walked, and you slid.Copy !req
343. Your nana and granddad
were waiting up for me.Copy !req
344. Me dad said, "Have you been in a fight?"Copy !req
345. And you went, "Something like that."
Dead hard. "Something like that."Copy !req
346. - Then you snogged the gob off me.
- Dad!Copy !req
347. - Oh my God.
- You did.Copy !req
348. Dad, no, stop!Copy !req
349. She did. First time
she ever gave me a frenchie.Copy !req
350. - Dad!
- I'll never forget it.Copy !req
351. - Full tongue and everything.
- Dad!Copy !req
352. - Love, you swallowed me tonsils.
- Ugh, Dad!Copy !req
353. - Well, maybe I did.Copy !req
354. But you are really good at holding hands.Copy !req
355. - Shall we hold hands in here?
- Yeah.Copy !req
356. - No.
- Oh, why not?Copy !req
357. - No.
- We'll embarrass our daughter, will we?Copy !req
358. - No, just don't want to.
- What do you mean?Copy !req
359. You should be made up.
You're a child born of love.Copy !req
360. Dad, stop.Copy !req
361. You know, a child
made of romance and petals.Copy !req
362. No! No!Copy !req
363. - Yeah. You little love child, you.Copy !req
364. Come on.Copy !req
365. - Child made of rainbows—
- Dad!Copy !req
366. And dandelions and daffodils.Copy !req
367. Yeah, all right.Copy !req
368. So immature. The pair of you. Children.Copy !req
369. So, what exactly
are we looking for, then?Copy !req
370. Uh…Copy !req
371. I dunno. Just something
to get the paint off.Copy !req
372. - Mm.
- I'll meet youse back here, yeah?Copy !req
373. What are we supposed to do?Copy !req
374. I dunno. Spend some money or something.
You're good at that, aren't ya?Copy !req
375. - We are. Lovely.
- We are good at that.Copy !req
376. Come on, let's spend some money.Copy !req
377. Excuse me, mate.Copy !req
378. - You all right, fella?
- Uh…Copy !req
379. Someone's put some spray paint on me van.
Wondering if you knew how I get it off.Copy !req
380. Oh yeah. Um…Copy !req
381. Not up on that really. But me colleague,
he might be able to sort you out.Copy !req
382. Okay.Copy !req
383. Quint?Copy !req
384. Where's he gone now? Quint?Copy !req
385. - Yeah, he's good with stuff like that.
- Okay.Copy !req
386. - You all right?
- Yeah, mate.Copy !req
387. Fella says he's got some spray paint
on his van. Wants to remove it.Copy !req
388. Oh no. Have you tried water and soap?Copy !req
389. Yeah, didn't touch it, mate.Copy !req
390. How powerful was your hose?Copy !req
391. I used a sponge.Copy !req
392. Okay. Well, you'll need to hose it.Copy !req
393. Then, use a paint thinner,
or strong alcohol.Copy !req
394. Vodka would do. Isopropanol, better.Copy !req
395. Then a microfiber towel.
Use that in a circular motion.Copy !req
396. What's that?Copy !req
397. We sell 'em. Um…Copy !req
398. - Follow me.
- Ta, mate.Copy !req
399. So, yeah,
circular motion with a towel.Copy !req
400. Bit of a prayer. Best you can do, really.Copy !req
401. Bit of a prayer?
Won't the towel thing get it off, no?Copy !req
402. Well, you'll probably have the residue.Copy !req
403. No, if you want it all off,
it's a respray job.Copy !req
404. What is it?Copy !req
405. A tag?Copy !req
406. God, kids.
I blame the parents, me.Copy !req
407. Can you just show me
where the blue paint is, please?Copy !req
408. Well, no, if it's paint,
like I said, you'll want it resprayed.Copy !req
409. I can't afford that, mate.
Just show us where your blue paint is.Copy !req
410. Any color will do, really.
It doesn't have to match.Copy !req
411. - I just need to get the thing off me van.
- Hey, I've just worked out who you are.Copy !req
412. I've seen photos of you on Facebook.Copy !req
413. - Can you just show us where the paint is?
- Yeah. Just up here.Copy !req
414. - Sorry, I didn't mean to embarrass you.
- It's all right.Copy !req
415. It's just, uh…Copy !req
416. Well, I'm on your side, you know.Copy !req
417. Your son's side. For what it's worth.Copy !req
418. Because he didn't do it, did he? I mean…Copy !req
419. Well, even the stab wounds,
where they said there were stab wounds,Copy !req
420. there's bone in the penetration spots.Copy !req
421. If you're making stuff up,
at least make it anatomically possible.Copy !req
422. Do you know what I mean?Copy !req
423. And, uh…Copy !req
424. Well, I've seen the photos of her.Copy !req
425. So you've got my support—Copy !req
426. - Can you just get me the paint?
- Sorry, yeah.Copy !req
427. - I just want the paint.
- Sure. Just…Copy !req
428. You should get him a good lawyer.Copy !req
429. If you crowdfund it,
lots of us would get behind it.Copy !req
430. Here's your paint.Copy !req
431. [Lisa, muffled] Dad. Dad.Copy !req
432. You know, um,Copy !req
433. I think there's people
actually here for a proper day out…Copy !req
434. - Next, please.Copy !req
435. - Anything else for you today?
- No, ta.Copy !req
436. - Interest in joining the club?
- No, you're all right.Copy !req
437. No? No worries at all, then.
£34.99 altogether, please.Copy !req
438. - Dad, you all right?
- Receipt?Copy !req
439. No, ta. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm all right.Copy !req
440. Yeah. Just… I'm just hungry, that's all.Copy !req
441. Okay.Copy !req
442. - Got a lovely plant. Isn't it lovely?
- Nice.Copy !req
443. I think a fella in tires
was eyeing me up, you know.Copy !req
444. We'll have to tell our Jane to come here.
It's a great place to pick up a fella.Copy !req
445. What?Copy !req
446. That's him, isn't it?Copy !req
447. - Who?
- Is he following me?Copy !req
448. They're taking the piss, aren't they?
Taking me for a twat?Copy !req
449. - Eddie!
- Shit!Copy !req
450. - Come here, you little shit!
- Eddie!Copy !req
451. Come here. Fucking get up!Copy !req
452. - Eddie!
- Did you do that to my van?Copy !req
453. - What?
- Did you do that to my van?Copy !req
454. - It was just a laugh.
- Well, it's not fucking funny, is it? Hey?Copy !req
455. Is it funny?Copy !req
456. Don't smile, kid, 'cause I'll slap
that fucking smile off your face.Copy !req
457. - Don't you fucking ever!Copy !req
458. Listen to me, you little twat. Get up!Copy !req
459. - Get up! Listen to me!
- All right.Copy !req
460. - You don't do that to people. Understand?
- Yeah.Copy !req
461. You don't know
what the fuck I've been going through.Copy !req
462. Don't fucking laugh at me, boy!
Don't laugh at me!Copy !req
463. Don't laugh at me.Copy !req
464. - Go on, fuck off.Copy !req
465. You stay away from my family!Copy !req
466. - Come on, hurry up.
- What you doing, man? Go!Copy !req
467. Take your fucking bike as well!Copy !req
468. - Come on.
- Wait.Copy !req
469. [Amanda, muffled] What are you doing?
What are you doing? Eddie!Copy !req
470. Eddie, come on.Copy !req
471. Eddie, please. Come on.Copy !req
472. Let's just get in the van
so we can go home.Copy !req
473. Give us that plant.
Give me the plant, love.Copy !req
474. Give me the plant. Give us your bag.Copy !req
475. Give us your bag.
Come on, give me your bag.Copy !req
476. Right, come on, girls.
Get in the other side, please.Copy !req
477. - Are you gonna clean that up?
- You what?Copy !req
478. Are you gonna clean that up?Copy !req
479. - No.
- It's a mess, pal.Copy !req
480. - I've paid for it.
- You need to clean it up.Copy !req
481. - Not gonna happen.
- Eddie!Copy !req
482. - You're on camera—
- You fucking shut up, you dickhead!Copy !req
483. - You shut up and get in the fucking shop!
- You're on camera.Copy !req
484. - Get in the van!
- You and your fucking mate, weird twat!Copy !req
485. Dad, should I… should I answer?Copy !req
486. [Eddie, quietly] Go ahead.Copy !req
487. - This is a message from…
- Jamie.Copy !req
488. …at Standling Secure
Training Centre.Copy !req
489. This call is from a person currently
in a prison in England or Wales.Copy !req
490. All calls are recordedCopy !req
491. and may be listened to by a member
of prison staff.Copy !req
492. If you do not wish to accept this call,
please hang up now.Copy !req
493. Dad?Copy !req
494. Hello, lad.Copy !req
495. Just wanted to say happy birthday.Copy !req
496. Thanks, mate.Copy !req
497. Thanks for calling.Copy !req
498. Did you get my card?Copy !req
499. I did, yeah. Yeah.Copy !req
500. And did you draw it?Copy !req
501. Yeah, I did.Copy !req
502. Thought so.Copy !req
503. I said to your mum,
I thought it was really good.Copy !req
504. Forgot how much you used to love drawing.Copy !req
505. Yeah. That's why I've started again.Copy !req
506. Is everything all right?Copy !req
507. Now the noise has settled down and that?Copy !req
508. Uh, yeah. It's all right.Copy !req
509. The librarian's all right with me, butCopy !req
510. I've been getting some bother in the yard,
but it's nothing.Copy !req
511. You know what to do,
don't you, lad?Copy !req
512. Yeah. Yeah. I've got people to talk to.Copy !req
513. Good.Copy !req
514. What are you doing today, then?Copy !req
515. I was just gonna have
some breakfast.Copy !req
516. - You haven't had breakfast yet?
- No.Copy !req
517. No, not yet, lad. We've been busy.Copy !req
518. Oh.Copy !req
519. I think we're gonna go
to the pictures later.Copy !req
520. And then our Lise wants a Chinese.Copy !req
521. Kung po king prawn?Copy !req
522. Yeah, you know the order, lad.Copy !req
523. Got any good presents, Dad?Copy !req
524. No, not yet.
We haven't done pressies yet, Jay.Copy !req
525. Um…Copy !req
526. - Dad?
- Yeah?Copy !req
527. Uh, I…Copy !req
528. I… I know today's not the day for it,
but it just happened, you know, and—Copy !req
529. What's happened, lad?Copy !req
530. Just tell me.
Forget it's me birthday. What's going on?Copy !req
531. Well…Copy !req
532. Well, with it all getting closer, I…Copy !req
533. I… I've thought about it, and…Copy !req
534. Dad, I'm gonna change my plea.Copy !req
535. Hello?Copy !req
536. Dad, I'm…Copy !req
537. I'm sorry, but I'm gonna plead guilty.Copy !req
538. Hiya, son. We're here as well.Copy !req
539. - Hiya, Jay.Copy !req
540. What?Copy !req
541. Oh.Copy !req
542. Has the food got any better, love?Copy !req
543. Uh, yeah, it's fine.
I thought it was just me and Dad here.Copy !req
544. I wrote to them about your intolerances.Copy !req
545. Did you? That's fine.Copy !req
546. Are you still
in the gym all the time?Copy !req
547. Only when I'm allowed.Copy !req
548. Are you gonna turn into
a bodybuilder or something?Copy !req
549. Not really, no.Copy !req
550. Anyway… I'd better get off
'cause there's other people waiting.Copy !req
551. All right, son.Copy !req
552. Usual time, end of the week, yeah?Copy !req
553. Perfect.Copy !req
554. - Dad?
- Yeah?Copy !req
555. I'm… I'm… I'm sorry.Copy !req
556. And… and happy birthday.Copy !req
557. - Thank—Copy !req
558. Get out this side.Copy !req
559. Watch the paint.Copy !req
560. Is he gonna be all right?Copy !req
561. He'll be all right. Come on.Copy !req
562. Come on.Copy !req
563. What happened there, love?
Kids, was it?Copy !req
564. Fuck off, Eileen.Copy !req
565. He hasn't fixed these windows properly.Copy !req
566. They didn't seal it right.
Did you feel a draft last night?Copy !req
567. - Is that the top that I got ya?
- Should've done it meself.Copy !req
568. Yeah.Copy !req
569. - Yeah.
- It looks so lovely on you, that.Copy !req
570. You're not bad for 50.Copy !req
571. Let's leave going to the pictures.Copy !req
572. No, you're all right.
I've got changed now.Copy !req
573. It's okay. We'll just leave it.Copy !req
574. No, it's all right. We'll go.Copy !req
575. It's okay.Copy !req
576. - You sure?
- Yeah.Copy !req
577. Ta.Copy !req
578. I thought he sounded better
than last week.Copy !req
579. Didn't he?Copy !req
580. Maybe making a decision
has made it a little better, eh?Copy !req
581. - You remember what Jenny said?
- Yeah.Copy !req
582. Yeah, I do. And I'm not.Copy !req
583. I'm not blocking ya.
Honest, I'm not. I'm not doing that.Copy !req
584. - Why are you being like this?
- Being like what, love?Copy !req
585. - You were the one in with him.Copy !req
586. - I've never even seen the tape.Copy !req
587. Please, let's not do all this again.Copy !req
588. That's becoming your catchphrase,
isn't it?Copy !req
589. "Let's not do this.
Let's not do that again."Copy !req
590. I mean me being in there, you not being
in there. Can we not do that again?Copy !req
591. - That wasn't what I was saying.
- Well, what are you saying then?Copy !req
592. You saw the tape. I didn't.Copy !req
593. This isn't you.Copy !req
594. Threatening kids. Wrecking your van.Copy !req
595. I know you're angry.Copy !req
596. But him going guilty
is probably for the best.Copy !req
597. And if you were honest,
you'd see that as well.Copy !req
598. I saw what I saw.Copy !req
599. And I didn't wanna believe it.Copy !req
600. And then, when I saw it…Copy !req
601. Eddie, I've known you
since you've had bum fluff.Copy !req
602. We've gotta survive this.Copy !req
603. What if we can't?Copy !req
604. Jenny says that when we feel like—Copy !req
605. Fuck what Jenny says, love.Copy !req
606. Fuck what Jenny says.
She's not here now, is she?Copy !req
607. He never left his room.Copy !req
608. He'd come home, slam the door,
straight up the stairs on the computer.Copy !req
609. I'd see the light on
at one o'clock in the morning.Copy !req
610. And I'd knock, and I'd say,Copy !req
611. "Jamie, come on, son.
You've got school tomorrow."Copy !req
612. And the light'd turn off,
but he never said nothing.Copy !req
613. We couldn't do nothing about that.Copy !req
614. All kids are like that
these days, aren't they?Copy !req
615. You don't know
what they're watching in their room.Copy !req
616. Could be watching porn or anything.
Do you know what I mean?Copy !req
617. Look at that fella
that popped up on my phone,Copy !req
618. going on about how to treat women,
how men should be men, and all that shit.Copy !req
619. I was only looking
for something for the gym, weren't I?Copy !req
620. You can't keep an eye on them
all the time, love. We just can't.Copy !req
621. He has a terrible temper. But so have you.Copy !req
622. Don't say that.Copy !req
623. Well, I didn't give him that, did I?Copy !req
624. - What, did I give him that?
- No.Copy !req
625. But I do sometimes think
we should have stopped it.Copy !req
626. Seen it and stopped it.Copy !req
627. We can't think like that.Copy !req
628. Remember? That's what she said.Copy !req
629. It's not our fault.Copy !req
630. Can't blame ourselves.Copy !req
631. But we made him, didn't we?Copy !req
632. When I was his age,
my dad used to fucking batter me.Copy !req
633. Sometimes he'd take the belt at me,
and he'd fucking whack me,Copy !req
634. and he'd whack me.Copy !req
635. And I promised meself…Copy !req
636. I said, "When I have my own kids,
I'd never do that."Copy !req
637. I'd never… I'd never do that to me kids.Copy !req
638. And I didn't, did I?Copy !req
639. I just wanted to be better.Copy !req
640. But am I?Copy !req
641. Am I better?Copy !req
642. You tried to be.Copy !req
643. We both did.Copy !req
644. Yeah, I tried to be.Copy !req
645. I took him to footy, didn't I?
'Cause I thought it'd toughen him up.Copy !req
646. No, but he was crap.Copy !req
647. So they just stuck him in goal.Copy !req
648. And I just stood there
on the side of the pitchCopy !req
649. while all the other dads
were laughing at him.Copy !req
650. And I could feel him looking at me.Copy !req
651. And I couldn't look at him, Mand.Copy !req
652. I couldn't look at me own boy.Copy !req
653. He idolized you.Copy !req
654. And then, I took him boxing.Copy !req
655. I thought that'd make a difference.Copy !req
656. Well, that lasted ten minutes.Copy !req
657. I know.Copy !req
658. - He used to draw downstairs, remember?
- Yeah.Copy !req
659. Remember he sat at the table,
the kitchen table, and he'd draw pictures.Copy !req
660. - And he was good, wasn't he?
- Yeah, he loved it.Copy !req
661. He was really good. He loved it.
He was there for hours, wasn't he?Copy !req
662. Then he stopped that.Copy !req
663. He wanted a computer,
so we got him the computer.Copy !req
664. We got him the desk and everything.
The keyboard, the headset, all that stuff.Copy !req
665. And I used to play the footy with him.
Remember I played the footy with him?Copy !req
666. Yeah.Copy !req
667. And then the business took off, didn't it?Copy !req
668. I'd have to leave at 6:00,
and I wouldn't get back till 8:00.Copy !req
669. I was home earlier, and I did no better.Copy !req
670. You were a good mum.Copy !req
671. You are a good mum.Copy !req
672. Maybe I took my eye off the ball
a little bit.Copy !req
673. But he was in his room, weren't he?Copy !req
674. - We thought he was safe, didn't we?
- Yeah.Copy !req
675. Didn't we think he was safe?Copy !req
676. You know, what harm can he do in there?Copy !req
677. I thought we were doing the right thing.Copy !req
678. I was a good mum.Copy !req
679. - You was.
- I am a good mum.Copy !req
680. You're a good dad. A great dad.Copy !req
681. But we made him.Copy !req
682. So if my dad made me…Copy !req
683. how did I make that?Copy !req
684. Come here.Copy !req
685. We didn't know what he was gonna do.Copy !req
686. That's why he wanted you in there
with him. He knew you wouldn't believe it.Copy !req
687. He thought you'd protect him.Copy !req
688. Should I have protected him?Copy !req
689. You couldn't.Copy !req
690. - Could I have protected him?
- No.Copy !req
691. Should we have done more though?Copy !req
692. I think it'd be goodCopy !req
693. if we accepted
that maybe we should've done.Copy !req
694. I think it'd be okay for us to think that.Copy !req
695. I still see that little boy.Copy !req
696. A bit gormless.Copy !req
697. Swinging on the monkey bars.Copy !req
698. Drawing pictures downstairs of monsters.Copy !req
699. Eating choc ice.Copy !req
700. And he'd get it
all over his face, wouldn't he?Copy !req
701. It'd be all over his face.Copy !req
702. His little face.Copy !req
703. It feels like it was yesterday.Copy !req
704. It was.Copy !req
705. It was.Copy !req
706. He just kept saying it over and over.Copy !req
707. He just kept saying, "It wasn't me."Copy !req
708. "Dad, it wasn't me."Copy !req
709. And I believed him.Copy !req
710. And then I saw the tape.Copy !req
711. How?Copy !req
712. I wish it had been you.Copy !req
713. I wish he'd have picked you.
You'd have done better.Copy !req
714. - No.
- Yeah, you would.Copy !req
715. No.Copy !req
716. You'd have done better.Copy !req
717. - Are you guys all right?Copy !req
718. - Yeah. You all right, love?
- Yeah.Copy !req
719. Is that new? It's lovely.Copy !req
720. - Yeah.
- No, it's not new. I'm probably just…Copy !req
721. Probably just wearing it different 'cause…Copy !req
722. You know, guys, it's the combinations.Copy !req
723. I talk about it all the time.
Combinations are everything.Copy !req
724. I just… I just thought,
"When else do I get to look a bit nice?"Copy !req
725. It's Dad's birthday, you know.Copy !req
726. Is that the top that Mum got ya?Copy !req
727. Yeah.Copy !req
728. It's nice.Copy !req
729. - I should put something nice on as well.
- No.Copy !req
730. You look lovely as you are.Copy !req
731. Lisa, I'm sorry, love.Copy !req
732. - Them lads and this stuff with the van.
- Dad, the van…Copy !req
733. It's fine. I mean, the van looks worse,
but you can't read the word on it anymore.Copy !req
734. I'll get it resprayed.Copy !req
735. Was it them lads?Copy !req
736. Yeah, do you know them?Copy !req
737. Yeah. They're…Copy !req
738. - They're dickheads, to be honest.
- Hey, language.Copy !req
739. Sorry.Copy !req
740. - Have they caused you any trouble?
- Dad, ev—Copy !req
741. Everyone causes me trouble.Copy !req
742. Jamie's sister.Copy !req
743. But we're staying here.Copy !req
744. We're not moving. We can't move.Copy !req
745. - We could do though.
- No, Mum…Copy !req
746. Mum, if we move,
it'll be better for a bit.Copy !req
747. But then someone's
gonna find out something,Copy !req
748. and then that… that something
is gonna be everything,Copy !req
749. and then it'll just be even worse.Copy !req
750. You know…Copy !req
751. It's Jamie.Copy !req
752. Jamie's ours.Copy !req
753. Isn't he?Copy !req
754. We thought we'd leave
going to the pictures.Copy !req
755. Yeah. That's, um…Copy !req
756. That's good. We can, um…Copy !req
757. - We can rent a film here?
- Yeah.Copy !req
758. - That's a good idea.
- Yeah, we could find some popcorn.Copy !req
759. - We've got popcorn somewhere.
- Yeah.Copy !req
760. - We can get takeaway.
- Yes!Copy !req
761. - Yeah.
- Please.Copy !req
762. Prawn crackers for everyone?Copy !req
763. Prawn crackers for everyone.Copy !req
764. Shall we have some breakfast?Copy !req
765. - A sort of breakfast?
- Yeah.Copy !req
766. Come on.Copy !req
767. That black pudding
will be sprouting legs and walking soon.Copy !req
768. - Um, I'll set the table.
- Thank you.Copy !req
769. - I'll give you a hand.
- You're coming nowhere near, birthday boy.Copy !req
770. How did we make her?Copy !req
771. The same way we made him.Copy !req
772. I'm sorry, son.Copy !req
773. I should've done better.Copy !req