1. Hey.
Copy !req
2. I don't know the right words.
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3. Ought to be a septon here.
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4. You were a true knight.
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5. You never beat me
when I didn't deserve it.
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6. Fuck.
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7. Except that time
in Maidenpool.
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8. It was the inn boy
ate the widow woman's pie.
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9. Not me. I told you.
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10. Why, you...
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11. Doesn't matter now.
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12. I'd leave your sword,
but it—
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13. it would only rust
in the ground.
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14. I wish you didn't die, ser.
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15. I'll take good care
of the horses.
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16. Eat like a king
if I sold you three.
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17. For a year or two.
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18. Then what?
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19. That road ends in outlawry
or beggary.
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20. We could go to a city.
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21. King's Landing?
Lannisport?
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22. Could join the City Watch.
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23. Stop raping, ser.
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24. Fits my grip
as well as it ever fit his.
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25. And there is a tourney
at Ashford Meadow.
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26. Hello there.
Are you the stableboy?
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27. I want the palfrey
rubbed down.
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28. And oats for all three.
You tend to them?
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29. I could, if I wanted.
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30. None of that.
See to the horses.
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31. You'll get a copper
if you do well,
and a clout in the ear if not.
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32. Sit where you like.
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33. There's good lamb
roasted with a crust of herbs
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34. and some ducks
my son shot down.
Which will you have?
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35. Both.
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36. You're big enough for it.
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37. - How much farther to Ashford?
- Day's ride.
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38. Is my boy seeing to your horses
or has he run off again?
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39. No, he's there.
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40. Half the town's
gone down the tourney.
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41. Mine would, too,
if I allowed it.
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42. I swear,
I couldn't tell you why.
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43. Knights are built the same
as other men.
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44. And I never knew a joust
to change the price of eggs.
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45. Bound for
the tourney yourself?
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46. I dreamed of you.
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47. Stay the fuck away from me.
You hear?
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48. My lord?
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49. Never you mind
that one, ser.
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50. I'll see about your food.
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51. Hiya!
Take that! Yah!
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52. - Oi!
- My lord.
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53. - You thief!
- I— I did not mean
to offend you.
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54. Take that armor off you.
Now!
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55. And be glad Thunder
didn't kick you
in that fool head of yours.
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56. He's a war horse,
not a boy's pony.
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57. I could ride him
as well as you.
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58. Close your insolent mouth.
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59. I—
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60. I'm a knight,
I'll have you know.
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61. You don't look
to be a knight.
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62. - What, all knights look
the same, do they?
- No.
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63. But they don't look
like you either.
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64. Your belt's made of rope.
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65. So long as it holds
my scabbard, it serves.
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66. Are you going
to the tourney, then?
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67. Do you mean to enter the lists?
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68. Yeah, I suppose I do.
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69. Take me with you, ser.
Please.
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70. And what might
your mother say to that?
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71. Not much.
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72. She's dead.
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73. Is the innkeeper not your...
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74. You're an orphan boy.
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75. Are you?
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76. I was. Once.
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77. Till my ser took me in.
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78. Taught me arms
and riding, and...
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79. and taught me
everything, really.
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80. Best he could.
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81. If you could bring me
to Ashford,
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82. I could squire for you, ser.
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83. And you can teach me
best you can.
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84. No, I have no need
for a squire, lad.
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85. Every knight needs a squire.
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86. And you look like you need one
more than most.
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87. And you look like you need
a good clout in the ear.
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88. Fill me a sack of oats.
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89. I'm off for Ashford.
Alone.
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90. Look, lad, I promise you...
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91. you're better off not squiring
for the likes of me.
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92. For your help.
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93. Sulk all you wish.
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94. I know you'll scoop it up
as soon as I'm gone.
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95. Sorry.
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96. Piss off.
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97. Beg pardon, men.
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98. I wish to speak
to the master of the games.
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99. Oh!
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100. What do you want, man?
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101. Got you again!
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102. I, uh, came for the tourney.
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103. My lord's tourney
is a contest for knights.
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104. - You a knight?
- Hyah!
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105. Oi! Psst!
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106. A knight with a name, mayhaps?
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107. Uh, Dunk.
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108. Ser Dunk.
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109. I— I was squire
to Ser Arlan of Pennytree
since I was a boy.
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110. He knighted me before he passed,
with his own sword.
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111. That's his penny there
in the hilt.
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112. Well, a sword it is
for a certainty.
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113. But I've never heard
of this Arlan of Pennytree.
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114. You were his squire,
you say?
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115. He always meant for me
to be a knight one day...
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116. as he was.
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117. Am I to be a knight
one day, ser?
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118. As you are?
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119. When he was dying,
he called for his longsword
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120. and bade me kneel.
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121. Charged me
to be a good knight.
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122. To defend the weak
and the innocent.
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123. Serve the realm
with all my might.
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124. And I swore that I would.
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125. Any knight can make a knight,
it's true.
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126. Were there witnesses
to your dubbing?
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127. Only a robin in a thorn tree.
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128. This is Ashford town, lad.
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129. Know what comes to men here
who pretend at sacred oaths?
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130. - I'm— I'm not—
- We hang you
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131. naked by your hands
and your feet...
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132. lower you down asshole first
onto a sharpened point
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133. and fuck you dry.
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134. Call it the Ashford chair.
So, I ask you again.
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135. Were there witnesses
to your dubbing
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136. besides a fuckin' songbird?
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137. Well, the—
see, it was raining.
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138. - Uh—
- I'm bullshitting you.
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139. "Ashford chair."
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140. You take a boot to the head?
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141. This is the Reach,
not the Riverlands.
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142. - "Ashford chair."
- Think we're fending off
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143. some scourge of cottagers,
scuttling about,
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144. entering tourneys?
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145. You'd need coin.
Armor.
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146. Horses. Men.
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147. Training,
gods be good.
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148. Imagine the poor farmer
charging down
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149. Lyonel Baratheon
in the lists.
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150. Mm, that would be—
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151. A different sort
of entertainment.
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152. Mm. Well, I'm no farmer.
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153. Yet you've come
dressed as one.
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154. Look, man,
my Lord Ashford
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155. fancies himself of great import.
Gods know why.
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156. Well, that means
I'm to ward off
every landed knight
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157. and sellsword
vying to challenge.
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158. You understand?
There are princes about.
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159. No, of course.
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160. Your late master.
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161. He'll be known
to the true knights
here assembled?
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162. There was a pavilion
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163. flying the banner
of House Dondarrion.
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164. Aye, Ser Manfred of that house.
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165. Ser Arlan served
his lord father in Dorne
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166. a few years past.
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167. Ser Manfred
will remember us.
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168. By scent alone, no doubt.
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169. If he'll speak
to your good honor,
bring him here with you
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170. before the tourney
begins on the morrow.
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171. Leave your escorts behind.
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172. - As you say.
- Aye.
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173. You are aware that those
vanquished in tourney
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174. forfeit their arms,
armor, and horse
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175. to the victors,
and must ransom them back?
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176. - Aye.
- And you have coin
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177. - to pay such ransom?
- Oh, gods, no.
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178. I— I mean,
I won't have need of coin.
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179. Seven fu—
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180. Mind those two. Good girl.
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181. Uh, pardon, sers.
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182. I— I need speak
with Ser Manfred.
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183. Good.
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184. He's napping, ser.
Wake him for a stag.
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185. I, uh...
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186. I don't—
I don't have a stag.
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187. What kind of knight
don't got a stag?
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188. - It's a hedge knight, ain't it?
- What?
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189. It's like a knight,
but sadder.
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190. No, I'm— I'm not sad—
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191. He's gotta sleep in the hedges
'cause no lord'll have it.
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192. Aw. That is sad.
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193. And Ser Manfred's
fucked its wife, too.
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194. - No, I— I don't have a wife.
- Oh!
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195. 'Cause we're used
to husbands coming 'round.
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196. Likes fucking wives,
that one.
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197. Near as much
as he likes fucking us.
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198. Told me he's on a mission
to turn the whole world red.
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199. - Well, we're already red.
- So we are.
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200. Well, um, when do you expect
Ser Manfred to wake, then?
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201. It might wanna try back
at evenfall.
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202. Evenfall.
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203. - Goodbye.
- Yeah.
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204. Arse.
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205. Why'd she say that, huh?
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206. We're not sad.
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207. Certainly not
rising-to-the-level-
of-a-comment sad.
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208. Besides, Ser Arlan
always said that...
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209. a hedge knight
was the truest kind of knight.
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210. When we win our first tilt,
we'll have the loser's armor
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211. and horse, or his gold.
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212. Won't be sad then.
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213. I know.
Said if we did win.
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214. Look, it's not a crime
against the king
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215. to enjoy a nice thought
for a trice.
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216. Do not muck about
with me, Raymun.
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217. You're a good-for-nothing
useless rat.
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218. What are you gawping at,
you blue-eyed cunt?
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219. That's a longsword you wear?
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220. Uh, yes, it is mine by right.
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221. That's an odd thing to say.
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222. I'm Ser Steffon Fossoway.
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223. Come try me.
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224. As you see, me cousin here
is not ripe yet.
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225. Do it, ser.
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226. I may not be ripe,
but my cousin's
rotten to the core.
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227. - Knock the seeds out of him.
- Quiet!
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228. I— I thank you,
but I have matters to attend.
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229. What, matters of the hedge,
I have no doubt.
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230. Fucking size of ya.
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231. Stupid bastard.
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232. Ser Grance!
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233. Perhaps we should seek
quieter accommodations.
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234. Oh. Fuck.
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235. He's napping still.
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236. - Still?
- Mm.
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237. On account of his gouty toes.
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238. One of life's absurd
little miseries, to be sure.
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239. Makes for restless nights.
The poor dear.
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240. Right, absolutely.
It's just...
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241. Well, it is of some urgency
that I speak with him,
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242. so I may enter
the lists on the morrow.
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243. - What's this?
- It means the joust.
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244. Awful dangerous, that.
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245. Yes, well, um...
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246. I'm not troubled
with a wealth of options,
am I?
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247. And if I mean
to take service in a castle—
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248. It must put its body at hazard
for the pleasure of strangers.
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249. Ain't that our job?
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250. Ah! Shut up!
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251. You're meant to be dead.
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252. Find a safer trade, lad.
You'll be happier for it.
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253. One whore to another.
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254. Must you mock me?
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255. I was only asking
for a bit of help.
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256. I'll try Ser Manfred
back in the morning.
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257. Sorry, lad.
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258. Aye.
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259. We don't mean
to mock you.
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260. - We see plenty of green boys
every tourney.
- Mm.
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261. All with glory in their minds,
but never in their hands.
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262. Well, perhaps
I will be different.
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263. Be good to your body, knight.
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264. Last one you're like to have.
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265. Our brave hero forges on,
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266. leaving all he knows behind.
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267. A father and a friend,
may seem the world unkind.
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268. Fate has set his lonely path
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269. through corridors of chance.
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270. A boy from nothing risks it all,
ignoring looks askance.
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271. Perhaps he's only stupid...
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272. holding fast
his mirror shield.
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273. Great honor his ambition,
must keep a truth concealed.
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274. For if his humble shape
is bared,
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275. a foul and fiery demise.
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276. Should the dragon discover
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277. none but a man
in great disguise.
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278. Halfman! Halfman!
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279. Do I look like
a half man to you?
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280. Aye.
Half man, half giant.
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281. Look, I'm sorry.
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282. I should not have urged you
to try my cousin.
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283. He'd have broken your hand
or a knee, if he could.
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284. He likes to batter men
in the yard,
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285. you know, in case
he meets them in the lists.
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286. He did not break you.
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287. I'm his blood.
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288. Though he is the senior branch
of the apple tree,
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289. which he never ceases
to remind me.
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290. Will you and your cousin
ride in the tourney?
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291. He will.
I would that I could,
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292. but I'm only a squire.
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293. Fight well for a squire.
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294. You have the look
of a challenger.
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295. Whose shield
do you mean to strike?
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296. Makes no difference.
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297. That's what
you're supposed to say.
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298. Though it makes
all the difference
in the world.
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299. You hungry?
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300. Always.
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301. Lyonel Baratheon.
The Laughing Storm,
they call him.
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302. I thought he'd be bigger.
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303. Four thousand years ago...
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304. - Four thousand years...
- Where are you going?
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305. ago— cunts.
I can't hear myself.
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306. I've had a profound thought,
if anyone would care to listen.
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307. Four thousand years ago,
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308. our ancestors
gathered in that...
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309. big field outside
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310. to blood each other with sticks
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311. and have a little bit
of gay fun.
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312. And they say it was
this country's first-ever joust.
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313. Well, I say...
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314. Uh, the fuck
was I gonna say?
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315. "First-ever joust..."
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316. Ah.
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317. Men could not have devised
such a joy.
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318. So, who was it?
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319. Huh?
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320. Who was it?
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321. Mm.
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322. Fuck it.
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323. A hundred gold
to the man, beast,
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324. or god who sticks me best.
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325. Now, eat your birds
so we can dance!
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326. You ever been punched
in the face before?
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327. I beg— I beg your pardon,
Ser Lyonel?
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328. Big men get punched
more than little men.
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329. Did you know that?
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330. No, but— but I believe it.
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331. That why you slouch?
So you don't get punched?
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332. I— I don't slouch.
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333. Oh, you've been
cowering all evening
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334. like a maiden
on her wedding night.
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335. I— I meant
no disrespect, ser, honest.
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336. Where I grew up, you—
you learn to go unnoticed,
is all.
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337. The seven above
gave you tallness.
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338. So, be tall.
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339. Or I will name you a heretic
and burn you.
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340. Drown you.
Drop you off a tall pl—
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341. I don't know.
W-What do they do to heretics?
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342. Burn them, my lord.
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343. Fine.
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344. What have you brought me?
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345. Um...
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346. Uh, ser, I...
beggin' your pardons.
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347. I— I didn't realize.
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348. You wish to curry
my favor some.
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349. Yet you come
with an empty hand.
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350. Lord Cafferen,
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351. the smug cunt in red...
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352. he is scarce
to pay his rents.
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353. His people starve each winter,
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354. yet even he shinied up this...
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355. bauble from
his family's cellars,
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356. for he understands
that all men, in their way,
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357. wish only for your help,
or your head.
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358. You've come for my head, then.
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359. W-What?
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360. No! No.
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361. Then, why the fuck
are you in my tent?
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362. S-Supper.
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363. Alright.
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364. Actually makes sense.
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365. - Supper.
- What is your name, man?
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366. Dunk— Ser Dunk.
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367. That's ridiculous.
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368. Do you like dancing?
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369. Doesn't everyone?
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370. Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
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371. The swells heaved.
You could lick
salt from the air.
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372. But I'd come to find
what men do
when they die at sea.
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373. So, drove I on
into the storm.
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374. - Weren't you afraid?
- Ahh.
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375. Within every man,
there are many men.
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376. Mm.
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377. But that I had to do,
Stormlanders had always done.
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378. And if they had done it,
I could do it, too.
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379. Hm.
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380. You know, it's best
not to agonize.
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381. Yeah, I— I agonize a lot.
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382. Mm.
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383. Sometimes, I— I think
I agonize too much,
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384. and I just end up
agonizing over that.
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385. Mm.
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386. And I'm quick and strong, sure.
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387. - Sure.
- But so are you.
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388. Sure.
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389. Plus, you've trained
sword and lance
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390. with the finest
masters-at-arms in the realm.
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391. I mean...
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392. what chance do I have?
Truly?
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393. Oh, you have no chance.
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394. But it's a great honor to test
oneself against a worthy foe.
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395. - No disrespect, ser.
- Mm.
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396. That's easy for you to say.
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397. You have a name,
an inheritance.
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398. One loss, and I won't be able
to ransom back my own horse.
Copy !req
399. A knight without a horse
is no knight at all.
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400. - Aye.
- Mm.
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401. So, what should I do?
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402. I don't know.
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403. I'm really quite drunk.
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404. Okay.
Copy !req
405. Thanks.
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406. Sorry.
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407. Ser Arlan of Pennytree.
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408. He— he served your Lord Father
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409. to hunt the Vulture King
in the Red Mountains.
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410. I— I was only a boy, but—
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411. I thought you said
you were a Dornishman.
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412. No, he said he's hung
like a Dornishman.
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413. No, I said
I've hung Dornishmen.
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414. Perhaps we would speak
on the morn.
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415. I know your
penny knight not.
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416. Nor you, brother.
Be gone.
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417. But Ser Arlan took a wound
in your father's service.
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418. How could you have
forgotten him?
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419. My lord father
took 800 swords
into those mountains.
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420. We've forgotten men
who reaped much more
than a wound.
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421. Please, ser, I— I will not
be allowed to challenge
Copy !req
422. unless a knight
or a lord will vouch for me.
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423. And what is that to me?
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424. You!
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425. What...
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426. What are you doing?
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427. Cooking a fish.
Do you want some?
Copy !req
428. No. I mean,
how did you get here?
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429. Did you steal a horse?
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430. I rode in the back
of a lamb cart.
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431. Lamb cart.
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432. - Well, you best
find another one.
- You can't make me go.
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433. I'd had enough of that inn.
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434. Now, listen,
I'll have no more
insolence from you, boy.
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435. I should throw you
over my horse
and take you home.
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436. You'd need to ride
all the way
to King's Landing.
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437. - You'd miss the tourney.
- King's Landing?
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438. - You're from Flea Bottom?
- No.
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439. Aye.
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440. What are those doing there?
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441. I washed them.
I made the fire,
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442. caught the fish,
and groomed the horses.
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443. I would have raised
your pavilion,
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444. but I couldn't find one.
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445. - There's my pavilion.
- That's a tree.
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446. Yes, and it's all the pavilion
a true knight needs.
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447. I'd sooner sleep under the stars
than in some smoky tent.
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448. What if it rains?
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449. The tree will shelter me.
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450. Trees leak.
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451. So they do.
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452. What's your name?
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453. - Dunk.
- Ser Dunk.
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454. That's no name for a knight.
Is it short for Duncan?
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455. Yeah.
Yes.
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456. Uh, Ser Duncan of...
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457. Ser Duncan the Tall.
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458. Never heard of him.
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459. Do you know every knight
in the Seven Kingdoms, then?
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460. The good ones.
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461. - You got a name, thief?
- Egg.
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462. Egg.
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463. Well, Egg, by rights,
I should beat you bloody,
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464. send you on your way.
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465. But you look as though
you don't eat much.
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466. And if you'll swear
to do as you're told...
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467. I'll let you serve me
for the tourney.
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468. After that, well...
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469. we'll see.
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470. I don't have much,
but if you prove
worth your keep...
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471. you'll have clothes on your back
and food in your belly.
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472. The clothes
might be rough-spun
and the food,
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473. salt beef and salt fish,
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474. but you won't go hungry.
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475. I promise not to beat you.
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476. Except when you deserve it.
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477. Yes, my lord.
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478. "Ser."
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479. I'm only a hedge knight.
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480. A falling star brings luck
to those who see it.
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481. Go to sleep, boy.
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482. All the other knights
are in their pavilions by now,
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483. staring up at silk
instead of sky.
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484. Do you want a clout
in the ear?
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485. S-So, the luck is ours alone?
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