1000 Ways to Die 1x8

1. >> If you only had a half an

2. hour left to live, how should

3. you spend it?

4. >> Aah!

5. >> By Watching this episode of

6. 1,000 ways to die?

7. Duh,

8. We've got a good ol' boy who

9. doesn't use his head,

10. he loses it,

11. >> Aah!

12. >>

13. >> a couple of chinese

14. headbangers,

15. Two ozzy fans with a nose for

16. stupidity,

17. >> Dude!

18. >> And a deep-Sea diver who came

19. up for air,

20. Way too fast,

21. Death... It's a disease,

22. And we have the cure,

23. 1,000 ways to die,

24. Death is everywhere,

25. Most of us try to avoid it,

26. others can't get out of its way,

27. Every day we fight a new war

28. against germs, toxins, injury,

29. illness, and catastrophe,

30. There's a lot of ways to wind up

31. dead,

32. The fact that we survive at all

33. is a Miracle,

34. Because every day we live, we

35. face 1,000 ways to die,

36. >> Yeah, yeah, yeah,

37. Happy birthday, America,

38. >> All: Yeah,

39. >> It's the fourth of july,

40. >> Now, hurry up and cook me a

41. hot dog,

42. >> all across the country,

43. citizens are celebrating their

44. nation's birthday the best way

45. they know how,

46. >> Yeah?

47. Watch this, old Bernie got a

48. trick for ya,

49. >>

50. >>, by getting hammered,

51. >> Shut up,

52. Shut up,

53. >> The beer hammer dropped on

54. Bernie and his buddies long

55. before the sun went down,

56. >> Whoa!

57. >>

58. >> With these knuckleheads,

59. stupid is a vocation,

60. Bernie is about to show why,

61. >> I got a fourth of july for

62. ya,

63. >> Bernie has been planning the

64. mother of all firecrackers for

65. weeks,

66. >> Oh, boy,

67. >> a homemade fireworks

68. launcher, and a crudely made

69. bomb,

70. >> Look what ol' Bernie's got

71. for y'all,

72. >> Whoo,

73. >> whoo-Hoo-Hoo,

74. >> Oh,

75. homemade firecrackers!

76. >> Whoo!

77. >> Bernie Had combined ENOUGH

78. Cherry bombs to equal the

79. explosive power of a stick of

80. dynamite,

81. He clearly was not aware of the

82. reason why there's a federal law

83. banning homemade Bombs since

84. 1966,

85. >> Aah!

86. >>

87. >>

88. >> That firework probably acted

89. as a very strong, very forceful

90. projectile, almost like a small

91. cannonball taken in at a close

92. range,

93. So if you can imagine a small

94. cannonball hitting you in the

95. face at greater than 300 miles

96. per hour, that can cause some

97. pretty significant damage,

98. >> Bernie!

99. Hey, Bernie!

100. >> Besides Being severely

101. burned, Bernie's face shattered

102. from the impact, and his brain

103. Rattled inside his cranium,

104. causing fatal hemorrhaging,

105. >>

106. Hey, Bernie,

107. >> Hey, Bernie!

108. >> Every fourth of july,

109. fireworks accidents fill

110. emergency rooms around the

111. country,

112. Bernie managed to skip that

113. part, and went straight to the

114. morgue,

115. Of all the stories that have

116. passed through the 1,000 ways to

117. dieresearch department, this

118. one wins the medal of weirdness,

119. Pierre, a 32-year-Old frenchman,

120. has something called pica

121. syndrome, a very bizarre eating

122. disorder,

123. >> Pica syndrome is a disorder

124. in Which someone craves or eats

125. non-Food items, such as soil,

126. dirt, clay, lead, paint, glass,

127. you name it,

128. >> For reasons unknown, Pierre's

129. favorite snack was money,

130. Metal coins,

131. His brother tried to stop him,

132. but Pierre was resourceful,

133. He would scour the house for any

134. loose change, and scarf it down,

135. >> They do not know how to

136. distinguish between food and

137. non-Food items, and what's

138. readily available are metal

139. items,

140. Coins, or bracelets, or

141. necklaces, or something of the

142. sort,

143. >>

144. >> even the dog wasn't safe,

145. >> Oh, ahh,

146. >> over several weeks, the pain

147. builds in Pierre's stomach to

148. the point where he's forced to

149. go to the hospital,

150. >>

151. >> there's catastrophic damage

152. to Pierre's digestive system,

153. The metal could not be passed

154. through the intestines,

155. The weight built up until the

156. stomach was forced against the

157. base of his pelvis,

158. Doctors at the hospital

159. performed emergency surgery,

160. But it was too late,

161. They discovered the metal

162. objects in Pierre's stomach had

163. begun RIPPING open large veins

164. and arteries,

165. Eventually, his entire blood

166. supply drained out into his

167. abdomen,

168. >> Basically, the stomach had to

169. be surgically removed from this

170. man's body, and before they were

171. able to either create a New

172. stomach or heal him, he passed

173. away in the hospital,

174. Pica syndrome affects around

175. 200,000 people in the United

176. States,

177. Once it starts, it's difficult

178. to cure,

179. So far, the only way to stop it

180. permanently is death,

181. Next up,

182. Two chinese metalheads go off

183. the deep end,

184. >> Aah!

185. >> And,

186. >> is it kind of sexy?

187. >> Historical babes light up the

188. night,

189. >> in today's world, many

190. speak the universal language of

191. rock music,

192. Beijing youths Lee and feng were

193. no exception,

194. >> I think the young people in

195. China were attracted to heavy

196. metal music, uh, for many of the

197. same reasons as anywhere,

198. It's the... the power of the

199. music, the energy of it, you

200. know, and, uh, the culture,

201. >> By day they lived lives of

202. quiet desperation, working in a

203. factory, making cheap plastic

204. toys for export to the west,

205. But at night, heavy metal was

206. their Muse, and their small,

207. seven-By-Seven concrete

208. apartment became a 60,000-Seat

209. stadium,

210. And every night, they brought

211. the house down,

212. >> Aah!

213. >> Each Axl Rose scream, every

214. Pete townshend classic windmill

215. move, brought them closer and

216. closer to rock and roll nirvana,

217. >> Waah!

218. >> In that moment, for that

219. person, there is no logical

220. mind,

221. It's just all emotion and

222. energy,

223. And I think these two... they

224. probably were not thinking very

225. logically,

226. >> One night, after banging

227. every groupie on their magic

228. bus, after smashing Their air

229. guitars into pieces, there was

230. only one thing left,

231. the encore,

232. >> Aah!

233. >> whether a sacrifice to the

234. gods of rock, or just catching

235. his knockoff nike on the edge of

236. the bed, Lee took his last stage

237. dive out the sixth-Story window,

238. feng can't bear the thought of

239. breaking up the band,

240. He gives one last chinese

241. warlord scream,

242. >>

243. >> and follows his rock and roll

244. brother out the window,

245. >> Aah!

246. >> I think whatever band that

247. they were listening to should

248. dedicate the next album to them,

249. >> Confucius once said, "music

250. produces a pleasure which human

251. nature can't do without,"

252. Unfortunately, China will have

253. to do without Lee and feng,

254. In the 1920s, women were often

255. hired to perform tasks DEEMED

256. TOO delicate or menial for men,

257. That's how Wendy got hired onto

258. an all-Female work crew at

259. radium corporation, a new jersey

260. company that made military

261. watches and clocks,

262. Wendy and her coworkers were

263. given the job of painting the

264. numerals on watch faces,

265. They used a new kind of paint

266. called "Undark,"

267. >> The glow-in-the-Dark fluid

268. that they were using to paint

269. the faces of the watch... The

270. reason that it glows is because

271. it's radioactive, and it's a

272. compound called radium,

273. What causes problems... And for

274. this woman, was that she

275. probably ingested it,

276. >> This kind of detail work was

277. exacting,

278. To keep the tip of their

279. paintbrushes pointed, the ladies

280. were taught to wipe excess paint

281. off on their lips,

282. The radium girls discovered

283. undark had a hidden benefit,

284. >> Lips, ladies, lips,

285. >> They could apply it to each

286. other and literally make

287. themselves radiate,

288. >> Once it's in the body, it

289. mimics calcium, and so your body

290. incorporates it into bone, and

291. so a lot of these women ended up

292. getting bone cancer,

293. But it would also cause damage

294. anywhere that it came in

295. contact,

296. If they were ingesting it,

297. it would cause damage in the

298. stomach and the intestines, the

299. throat, the tongue, mouth,

300. >> Wendy thought it would be fun

301. to use her new look to light up

302. her sex life,

303. >> Uh-Huh,

304. Isn't it kind of sexy?

305. >> Why don't you get over here,

306. you little glow worm,

307. >>

308. >> numerous times, Wendy and her

309. husband played Peek-a-boo with

310. the magic paint,

311. But before long, they realized

312. that something about this

313. cutting-Edge technology was

314. making Wendy bleed in the most

315. bizarre places,

316. >> Radiation causes dna damage,

317. It'll cause mutations, and

318. that's why when the radium is

319. incorporated into bone, it has a

320. long time to sit there and

321. damage the soft tissue layer

322. inside the bone, and that can

323. lead to cancer... To bone cancer,

324. >> It turns out the company knew

325. all along about the harmful

326. effects of radium, yet they

327. allowed the girls to ingest it

328. daily,

329. Wendy was one of the first to

330. die,

331. But six of her colleagues banded

332. together in the first successful

333. worker's rights lawsuit,

334. Overcoming years of denial and

335. foul play, the radium girls led

336. to higher safety standards

337. across America,

338. Coming up,

339. a sexy scuba diver can't take

340. the pressure,

341. >>

342. >> and, snorting fire ants,

343. that's gotta hurt,

344. >> Aah!

345. >> Aah!

346. >> This next story is a warning

347. to all who worship false gods,

348. It can be extremely hazardous to

349. your health,

350. Taylor and Conrad's deity?

351. Ozzy osbourne,

352. >> Oz, man,

353. >> Ozzy,

354. >> To say they are ozzy fans

355. does a huge disservice to their

356. complete obsession with the

357. aging rocker,

358. >> Oz!

359. >> They live,

360. >> ozzy,

361. >> They breathe, they eat,

362. >> Oz burgers!

363. >> Oz burgers!

364. >> 'cause they're, like, baked

365. like oz,

366. >> Their commitment to ozzy

367. knows no bounds,

368. >> I love oz So much,

369. >> I'd do ozzy,

370. But not, like, in a gay way,

371. You know, just, like,

372. >> I would do him in a gay way,

373. >> Yeah, that's cool,

374. >> Both: One, two, oz!

375. >> Today's the big day,

376. Ozzfest is in town,

377. And Taylor has a special treat

378. for his friend,

379. >> Guess what it is,

380. Guess what it is,

381. >> I know, I know, right,

382. Oz-Cream,

383. >> Rock and roll legend has it

384. that ozzy and Nikki sixx once

385. snorted a line of ants to show

386. just how hardcore they were,

387. >> It's ants, man!

388. Fire ants, man,

389. >> The decision to snort

390. ants... From all the things you

391. could enact from ozzy osbourne...

392. This probably was not the best

393. thing to go for, to begin with,

394. It would be almost a punishment

395. if there wasn't any social

396. darwinism involved, and there

397. wasn't some kind of a

398. consequence involved,

399. >> Oh, dude,

400. >> Dude?

401. Nikki Sixx?

402. >> Yeah, Nikki sixx, ozzy, ozzy,

403. yeah!

404. Dude,

405. >> Taylor and Conrad wanna be

406. hardcore too,

407. A couple of lines of fire ants

408. should do the trick,

409. >> Oh!

410. >> No, I'm gonna take one, I'm

411. gonna take it... Here we go,

412. >> Oh!

413. >> Dude,

414. >> As soon as you snort up the

415. fire ants into your nose, the

416. first thing they'll do is bite,

417. >> Ow!

418. >> And immediately upon biting,

419. they sting,

420. They'll inject as much venom as

421. they can,

422. They are very, very pissed off,

423. And rightly so,

424. >> God, what is that?

425. >> Aah!

426. >> That will cause intense pain,

427. hence the headbanging,

428. Lots of drooling, lots of

429. screaming, wrenching of the

430. eyes, trying to clear the nose

431. out,

432. You gotta have very long things

433. to get the ants out of your

434. nose, and that's just not gonna

435. happen,

436. Then the swelling starts,

437. That'll start closing up the

438. nose,

439. You can't breathe,

440. The trachea starts to close up,

441. Suffocation follows,

442. >> Aah!

443. >>

444. >> ah!

445. >> Stupid bastards,

446. A couple hundred fire ants won't

447. necessarily kill you, but if you

448. inhale them into your nasal

449. cavity and down your throat, you

450. can't breathe, you die,

451. A couple of big jerks,

452. Ozz-Holes,

453. stay, stay,

454. >> This shapely redhead looks

455. like she's ready for her next

456. tanning session,

457. But looks can be deceiving,

458. Sandy is a deep sea diver,

459. A few hours ago, she narrowly

460. escaped death after her air

461. tanks failed at a depth of 350

462. feet,

463. She had to make an emergency

464. swim to the surface,

465. As any diver knows, this could

466. bring on a fatal attack of the

467. bends,

468. >> When we go down underwater,

469. we're absorbing more nitrogen

470. into our bodies,

471. The air that we're breathing

472. here, just in the atmosphere, is

473. about 20% oxygen, about 80%

474. nitrogen,

475. So it would be like shaking up a

476. soda bottle and trying to open

477. it up very quickly if you come

478. up to the surface really fast,

479. >> Now she's in a decompression

480. chamber, waiting it out while

481. the deadly nitrogen Bubbles

482. slowly dissolve back into her

483. bloodstream,

484. >> If you're down at, say, 100

485. feet, and you come up nice and

486. slow, the gas is gonna be slowly

487. expelled from the... the blood

488. through the lungs, and you can

489. exhale it out,

490. >> It's going to be hours before

491. she can exit the chamber,

492. But she's lucky to be alive, and

493. she knows it,

494. She'll take boredom over death

495. any day,

496. Unfortunately, the Grim reaper

497. had other plans for this sexy

498. scuba goddess,

499. A maintenance worker at the

500. scuba center accidentally opens

501. the Hatch to the decompression

502. chamber,

503. >> No!

504. >> In a nanosecond, Sandy goes

505. from sexy,

506. >>

507. >> to splattered,

508. All over the chamber,

509. >> If, uh, you were to go from

510. seven atmospheres to one

511. atmosphere in the blink of an

512. eye, it's pretty much a done

513. deal,

514. It's... It's over,

515. >> Up next, an unlucky skydiver

516. takes a really bad fall,

517. >> Can you hear me?

518. >> Did you ever have the urge to

519. try skydiving?

520. If so, you better not watch this

521. story,

522. Chris Colwell was a veteran

523. skydive teacher making a routine

524. jump, videotaping one of his

525. students,

526. >> It was different than a

527. regular routine day,

528. Uh, it was more a little bit fun

529. for me because it was... I hadn't

530. been jumping in a while,

531. I was also trying to give him

532. some skills... Some extra skills,

533. uh, to help him,

534. >> 2,000 feet into the jump,

535. Chris sees his student using the

536. wrong posture, slicing through

537. the air, down and away from

538. Chris,

539. Chris goes into a power dive to

540. catch up, quickly reaching 165

541. miles per hour,

542. But the student put his arms out

543. to slow down at the worst

544. moment,

545. Chris's neck snapped upon

546. impact,

547. >> Actual collision happened

548. very fast,

549. I-I realized I was still falling

550. to the earth, and I started to

551. have some thoughts of my life

552. ending and I was visualizing my

553. wife at the time, and friends

554. and good times that I had, and

555. at one point I just sort of let

556. go,

557. And I could see the green of the

558. earth coming up to my side,

559. I pretty much accepted I was

560. dying and I let go at that

561. point, and abruptly my parachute

562. opened up, and it was very

563. unexpected, but it opened up

564. properly,

565. >> Chris, can you hear me?

566. Chris,

567. >> Chris's body will never be

568. the same,

569. >> Help me,

570. Help m...

571. >> Okay,

572. >> Be still, we've got help on

573. the way,

574. >> Please help me,

575. >> But he's alive,

576. The accident took away his body,

577. but it revealed that Chris had

578. the mental strength to embrace a

579. new lease on life,

580. >> I tend to spend most of my

581. life now focusing on Helping

582. others live their lives versus

583. not living my life,

584. And that's basically

585. where... where I'm at and what

586. I've learned from my life now,

587. is that, uh, life doesn't end

588. because you lose a part of your

589. body,