1. Okay, I have narrowed it down
to one movie.
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2. We are seeing The Flowers of Time,
rated PG-Ti...
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3. by the Motion Picture
Association of America...
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4. and PG-12 by Peggy Hill.
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5. When I agreed to see a movie today...
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6. I assumed it was understood
that I meant not a ladies' picture.
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7. Hank, just because it takes place
on a rose farm...
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8. does not mean it's a ladies' picture.
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9. It doesn't help.
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10. Dang it!
She's been giving me trouble all week.
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11. First it was the
distributor components...
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12. then I had to tweak
the carburetor's fuel-air mixture—
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13. Oh, for God's sake!
Just take it to a mechanic.
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14. Another man touching her all over,
playing with her manifolds?
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15. And then making Hank pay for it?
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16. - Don't tell me.
- You'll pay for it.
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17. Peggy, this truck has been through
four presidents...
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18. three Cowboy Super Bowl victories,
and zero mechanics.
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19. There she goes.
All right, everyone in, quick.
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20. To The Flowers of Time.
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21. $5 a ton if you feed it to pigs...
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22. and it's the exact same corn.
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23. And they said
nobody beats the claw machine.
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24. That's great, Son. Now
give it to Connie.
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25. No. She won it for me.
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26. This is Charlton Heston and Ethan
Hawke's third movie together.
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27. The first two went straight to video.
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28. - Dale and I are the only guys here.
- No.
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29. There are two gentlemen right over
there. The ones with the mustaches.
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30. Hank, now look. That is a pillow sham.
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31. The only thing keeping you alive
is the pressure of the tractor.
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32. Son, I never really got around
to saying a lot of things.
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33. For being 106, that man has
a magnificent head of hair.
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34. Shush, sug'.
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35. This movie is good enough
to have been based on a novel. Hank?
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36. I won't make it to
harvest this year, Son.
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37. Yes, you will. You have to.
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38. I am so proud of you...
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39. Nathaniel.
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40. You are my rose.
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41. - Hank, are you crying?
- Nope.
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42. Just watching the movie.
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43. Hank, you're scaring me.
What the hell is going on?
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44. I'm okay.
Please continue to look at the screen.
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45. Hank Hill is weeping
like a little French girl.
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46. Come see what Channel 84 calls...
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47. "a fragrant bouquet
of human emotions."
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48. Oh, Hank, come on. There's no reason
to be ashamed about your crying.
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49. - But yet, I am.
- I wasn't crying.
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50. Coming from the heat of outdoors and
then into the air-conditioned theater...
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51. is naturally gonna cause
some condensation.
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52. Now, I am not a professional psychologist,
but I am an amateur psychologist.
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53. And I think
that this spontaneous eye-watering...
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54. may have something to do
with your father.
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55. Nope. It has nothing
to do with anything.
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56. Well, think about it. You have a
strained relationship with your dad...
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57. and your greatest fear
is that he will die...
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58. without telling you
how much he loves you.
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59. You are Ethan Hawke, Hank.
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60. That's just crazy talk.
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61. Our relationship is strained but fine.
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62. Wait. I don't know why
I didn't see this.
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63. You're right. You are not Ethan Hawke.
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64. You are Charlton Heston.
Bobby is Ethan Hawke.
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65. - Yes. Done.
- No, it is not done.
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66. You and Bobby are very distant emotionally
and quite distant physically.
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67. And you know that if you were
ever pinned under a tractor...
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68. Bobby wouldn't be able to lift it...
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69. and you wouldn't be able to tell him
that you love him.
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70. - That, Hank, that is why you were crying.
- No.
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71. There is something wrong with my eyes.
Something seriously wrong.
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72. - Yep, that's it. Good night.
- Oh. Okay.
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73. So now you're the amateur doctor.
Interesting.
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74. Bill, knock-knock.
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75. - Who's there?
- Boo.
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76. - Boo who?
- "Boo-Hoo" Hank.
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77. Man, that is a good one.
Man, I got another one.
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78. What do you call the difference
between a man and a little squirt gun?
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79. - What?
- Hank.
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80. So, I forgot how long the straw was,
and it caught me in the eye.
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81. That was Sprite running down
my cheek, not tears.
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82. - Okay.
- Let's go, Hank.
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83. We have a 2:00
with an optician at the mall.
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84. He's not a doctor.
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85. But there is nothing medically wrong with
you, so it doesn't really matter, does it?
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86. How much longer would you say
you have to be this close to my face?
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87. I'm not really finding anything wrong
with your eyes, Mr. Hill.
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88. Just as I thought
and diagnosed yesterday.
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89. Are you ready to admit
you were crying, Hank?
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90. Or do we need to see a brain doctor?
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91. Because I will go right back in there
and get a referral.
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92. Okay, you were right.
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93. I am crying.
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94. - You happy now?
- Well, I'm...
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95. I'm happy for me, but
I am sad for you.
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96. But, honey, I promise to keep this
between you, me, Bobby...
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97. and the family therapist
we will undoubtedly have to see.
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98. I'm not crying because of Bobby.
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99. Charlton Heston isn't me or Bobby.
Charlton Heston is...
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100. ls my truck.
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101. No, this is not because
of your truck, Hank.
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102. I think somethings wrong with her.
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103. I checked this morning...
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104. and there was water in the exhaust.
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105. Oh, God!
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106. Mr. Hill, I'm afraid
the news isn't good.
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107. She's only got about 500 miles left,
600 if you drive downhill a lot.
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108. - I'm just gonna close her up.
- You're not even gonna try to fix it?
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109. It would cost more to fix this truck
than it's worth.
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110. No, sir, I do not accept your answer.
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111. This truck has given me
20 years of reliable service...
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112. and you cannot put
a blue-book value on that.
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113. Now who's gonna tow me home?
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114. Hank's never gonna let this truck go, and
we're the ones who are gonna suffer.
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115. We will now be "rides
to the Auto Zone"...
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116. and "those chumps
who will push my truck."
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117. You can't blame Hank
for being attached to his truck.
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118. He loves it. And that's what you do
when you love something.
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119. You cling to it
so it doesn't try to run away.
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120. I've had my van for 10 years.
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121. First sign of weakness,
I'll shoot her myself.
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122. Look, she's running.
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123. All I did was change
the spark plugs...
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124. adjust the valve train
and rebuild the carburetor.
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125. She's purring like Eartha Kitt.
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126. You got a dang old fire in the hole, man.
Ain't gonna do nothing but blow, man!
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127. No, nothing to worry about.
Probably just a leak in the fuel line.
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128. I'll just have to watch it
until the engine runs out of gas.
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129. Yep.
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130. - Yep.
- Mm-hm.
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131. Yep.
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132. All right, Bobby.
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133. I think the carburetor just needed
a little fine-tuning. Crank it gently.
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134. Peggy, I know you said you'd divorce
me if I got rid of the Maverick.
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135. - So I hope you were kidding.
- Hank, it's beautiful.
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136. Hey, Dale, do you mind driving me over
to the Auto Zone?
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137. I'm just gonna break down
and buy a new carburetor.
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138. And so it begins.
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139. Sorry I'm almost late, sir.
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140. I tried that new left-turn
lane on Fourth. It was okay.
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141. Yeah, yeah. I need you, Hank.
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142. Clark Mobile Homes is threatening
to cancel their account.
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143. Oh, God! They have a heated pool
and communal barbecue pits.
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144. What the...
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145. I mean, what seems to be the problem
with Mr. Clark?
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146. It seems Enrique's been
short-filling their tanks.
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147. - Why would he do that?
- Well, I told him to.
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148. Cripes almighty! it's hot in here!
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149. Really?
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150. I was just thinking
it was a little chilly, actually.
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151. Now, someone's lying to me.
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152. Let's see.
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153. Is it the girl in
Accounting, my daughter?
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154. Or you fellows?
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155. Scout's honor, Roy.
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156. If Hank says those tanks were filled,
by God, those tanks were filled!
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157. Actually, sir, if you recall,
what I said was—
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158. Whoo-ee! I don't like
to get this sweaty...
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159. lessen I have a, you know,
little lady to towel off on.
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160. We lost the account, didn't we?
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161. So I raised my hand and said:
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162. "Mrs. Donovan, I think I speak
for the whole class...
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163. "when I say the homework load
has been a little heavy lately."
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164. And the class erupted.
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165. Bobby was in the middle
of a great story.
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166. - Start again, Bobby. Lots of energy.
- Okay.
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167. It was a day like any other—
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168. Here's a story for you.
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169. I've had a long day
and I lost a big account...
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170. and I don't have the energy
to listen to any stories. The end.
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171. Bobby, honey, it is not because
he doesn't love you.
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172. I know. It's because of his truck.
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173. Well, that is
what he keeps saying anyway.
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174. But what I think would really
help your father "fix his truck"...
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175. is for the two of you
to spend some good time together.
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176. Fixing his truck?
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177. It doesn't matter what you do, Bobby.
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178. No. Wait, honey.
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179. Don't tell him any more
of those boring school stories, okay?
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180. Hey, Dad. Need an extra set of hands?
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181. That is not a toy, it's
for lying down on.
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182. Dang it, BObbV!
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183. People are gonna see this oil stain and
think I'm a drunk. Now clean it up.
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184. "We perform miracles
at Pick-Up Truck Heaven."
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185. So I called and told them
the transmission's shot...
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186. and the engine mounts are rusty,
and it was catching fire a lot...
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187. and they said, "No problem."
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188. This place is all the
way in West Durndell.
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189. I'm not gonna drive my truck 40 miles
on some magic-carpet ride...
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190. so some jackass mechanic can tell me
there's nothing he can do.
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191. Come on, Dad.
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192. Your truck drove you to the hospital when
you cut your toe with a weed-whacker.
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193. You owe it to her to at least try.
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194. And you owe it to Bobby
to take him along.
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195. After all, this is his brilliant idea.
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196. I wish I could take credit for it.
Oh, I did buy the newspaper.
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197. I'm not sure.
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198. The address is either 1523...
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199. or 1528.
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200. It says,
"Look for the giant inflated gorilla."
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201. Is that it?
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202. Hello. I am Marty Mendez.
You must be Mr. Hill.
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203. I recognized your truck
from your son's description.
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204. You have my condolences.
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205. - Tell me, Marty, what do you recommend?
- A new truck.
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206. You're not a mechanic at all.
You're a salesman.
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207. I am the salesman.
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208. Salesman of the Month, March '98.
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209. I'm sure I mentioned that to your son.
I'm very proud of it.
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210. How could you?
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211. Eighty-four miles I'll never get back.
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212. It's not all my fault.
Mom did buy the paper.
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213. I'm as mad at her as you are.
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214. Come on.
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215. Bobby, take the wheel.
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216. I can't push it myself.
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217. She's too solidly manufactured.
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218. Stop making train noises.
It's not funny.
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219. Dad, it's not me. I think there's a...
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220. Bobby, get away from the tracks, now!
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221. Dad, leave it!
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222. Stop! Someone's on the tracks!
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223. Stop the train! Stop!
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224. No!
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225. So that's what it sounds like
when a train hits a truck.
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226. It was a little more trucky
than I would have thought...
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227. considering how much train there was.
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228. This is all your fault.
You killed my truck.
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229. I was just trying to help.
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230. And if it wasn't the train,
it would have been something else.
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231. That mechanic said
it only had 500 miles left.
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232. Even if he was right,
which he wasn't...
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233. if I only drove 5 miles a year, I
could have had her another 100 years.
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234. We should have asked for a lift.
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235. You just sit here
and try not to break any more trucks.
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236. You're back.
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237. Save your fancy come-ons
for the Okies, okay?
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238. I told you before, I'm not interested.
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239. And none of your song and dance
is gonna change that.
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240. Believe me, it would.
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241. Now, as long as you have come back...
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242. I feel I must tell you
that this bad boy comes...
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243. with a sunroof and seat-warmers
in its standard package.
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244. Well, sounds great. Let me just
put on a dress and hop on up.
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245. - Look, I just need a phone.
- There's one in the truck.
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246. I'm just being honest with you.
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247. I'm just gonna use the pay phone
in the showroom.
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248. Bobby, I'll just be a minute.
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249. Bobby?
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250. You looking for a little kid
about this big by this big?
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251. - He said he's walking home.
- What?
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252. - Why didn't you try to stop him?
- Looked like he could use the exercise.
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253. Red or green, honey?
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254. Well, I give up.
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255. I don't know if it was
you or the truck...
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256. but I need to test-drive this beauty
right now.
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257. I knew it.
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258. It feels like March '98
all over again. Yes.
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259. Excuse me, I'm looking for my son.
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260. A kid came running by,
asking for directions to Arlen.
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261. That's him.
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262. I pointed him north on Mariposa,
but he went west on Travis.
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263. The way I pointed.
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264. Okay, west.
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265. Bobby?
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266. Anti-lock brakes.
That's why they didn't lock.
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267. You can do it, Bobby.
Only 39 miles to go.
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268. Bobby, quick. Get in.
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269. I'm fine, thank you.
I am walking home.
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270. Bobby, you got tired
on the drive over here.
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271. Look, Bobby, I'm sorry I blamed you
for killing my truck.
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272. - I know it wasn't intentional.
- Well, you're damn right it wasn't!
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273. You think you're the only one
who loved that truck?
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274. I spent the best years of my life
in that truck.
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275. You did love my truck?
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276. I'm sorry I never got a chance
to tell her that.
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277. Come on. Why don't you climb on up?
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278. It's got seat-warmers.
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279. My butt is kind of numb.
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280. Hey, I got my own airbag...
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281. and a vanity mirror.
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282. I look pretty sweet in this truck.
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283. I found this by the tracks.
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284. You know,
maybe she died there for a reason.
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285. Like she was trying to
tell you something.
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286. Like, "Go back to the dealership
and buy a new truck.
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287. And then the train hit her.
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288. Yeah, maybe you're right.
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289. Maybe she is looking down on us
right now, from pick-up truck heaven.
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290. You know, the real one.
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291. Oh, man! There's something in my eye.
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292. Yeah, it's the new-car smell.
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293. It's very strong.
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294. - I love this truck.
- Yeah, me, too.
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295. But when we get back to the
dealership, pretend you hate it.
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296. To The Flowers of Time.
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